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View Full Version : Remember the Virgin Mary cheese toastie ?




Chappers
Apr 28, 2005, 10:25 AM
Well now the woman who made it, is selling the frying pan she used.

http://www.local6.com/slideshow/news/3745342/detail.html?qs=;s=42;p=news;dm=ss;w=320;tn=b

The Holy Pan - she calls it.

I'm speechless..... which is rare.



mad jew
Apr 28, 2005, 10:31 AM
How many can you order?

I've been in the market for Holy Pans for about six months now and I just haven't found one with a comfortable handle yet...

bousozoku
Apr 28, 2005, 12:00 PM
Yes, that's been a while now. You have to wonder about the people living in Floriduh. I certainly do. <looks in mirror>

Glad to see the local t.v. news website is making its way across the Atlantic.

emw
Apr 28, 2005, 12:03 PM
Did she wash it, or does it still come with the holy butter used to grease the pan? Or is that sold separately? :rolleyes:

Time to get the T-shirt machine rolling again.

Applespider
Apr 28, 2005, 12:18 PM
I've been in the market for Holy Pans for about six months now and I just haven't found one with a comfortable handle yet...

That's where you're going wrong. You need a Holy Pan with a cast iron handle. Put it on the stove with the heat full on, and then try to pick it up. I guarantee you'll hear imaginative callings on various forms of the Lord! ;)

FoxyKaye
Apr 28, 2005, 12:29 PM
See - that's what I'm talking about! As I've said before, I've got to get on the Virgin Mary Train (kinda like Crazy Train). There's gold in them thar hills!

I love it: religious fanatisism meets rampant capitalism with a dash of stupidity! Wasn't it PT Barnum who said a sucker is born every minute?

Wait, I think I see the Virgin Mary in my Mini's "Flurry" screen saver - gotta run! Time to cash in...

mactastic
Apr 28, 2005, 12:35 PM
Yeesh... someone oughta lob a holy hand grenade her way.

Just kidding of course.

emw
Apr 28, 2005, 12:40 PM
I love it: religious fanatisism meets rampant capitalism with a dash of stupidity! Wasn't it PT Barnum who said a sucker is born every minute?That's just it - if it were morons seeing the VM in everything from used Kleenex to crop circles, I'd be okay with them just being imbeciles.

But then selling it to make a buck? Some "holy" article of faith. :rolleyes:

virividox
Apr 28, 2005, 12:46 PM
haha thats hilarious whats next the spatula she used?

emw
Apr 28, 2005, 12:55 PM
And now for sale, the dentures worn to take that first fateful bite when she realized she was eating the Virgin Mary!

FoxyKaye
Apr 28, 2005, 12:57 PM
...But then selling it to make a buck? Some "holy" article of faith. :rolleyes:

Well, I suppose for the true believers this is the case - doesn't the Bible have something in it about moneychangers?

But I've gotta say as a complete non-Christian, there's real money in this - it would be just like a story out of those Chick Tracts: http://www.chick.com/catalog/tractlist.asp - which are also an amazing moneymaking enterprise.

Imagine, me, a poor Witch from Oakland doing nonprofit management work for a lefty (and therefore Godless) organization. One innocent day I'm munching on some Cheerios and soymilk, when suddenly BOOM! I gaze into my half-empty bowl and see a perfect outline of the Virgin Mary. She "Speaks To Me" and I change my heathen ways to become a "True Believer". Immediately, I quit my job, dump my girlfriend and run to the nearest church with my discovery. Suddenly, people want to see my Virgin Mary Cheerios and believe for themselves (for which I charge a small "maintenance fee" in order to keep them perfectly preserved in a sealed, temperature controlled, humidity controlled container). I go on the college speaking circuit and talk to all the chapters of Campus Crusade for Christ (for which I charge a small speaking fee, of course, to help me support my new life). I sell relics from the Cheerios bowl, I form an organization (with me as its Director) that does something Virgin Mary-related and has a small "membership fee", and so forth.

Of course, I'd rather chew off two or three of my own fingers. But hey, gotta give the girl credit for striking while the iron is hot.

mcadam
Apr 28, 2005, 01:06 PM
Well now the woman who made it, is selling the frying pan she used.

http://www.local6.com/slideshow/news/3745342/detail.html?qs=;s=42;p=news;dm=ss;w=320;tn=b

The Holy Pan - she calls it.

I'm speechless..... which is rare.

Well - she's not the only nutcase out there, browsed through the slideshow and came across this:
http://www.local6.com/slideshow/news/3745342/detail.html?qs=;s=46;p=news;dm=ss;w=320;tn=b

An Indiana pet store owner says a turtle that was the only animal to survive a fire at the shop has developed an image of Satan's face on its shell.

wonder how much that will go for on ebay...

A

emw
Apr 28, 2005, 01:11 PM
Hmmm. Maybe I'll buy both. I wonder what cosmic disarray would occur if you fried up the satan turtle in the virgin mary pan?

FoxyKaye
Apr 28, 2005, 01:13 PM
Hmmm. Maybe I'll buy both. I wonder what cosmic disarray would occur if you fried up the satan turtle in the virgin mary pan?

Thanks emw - that really made me laugh. :D :D :D

mcadam
Apr 28, 2005, 01:15 PM
And more...

http://www.local6.com/slideshow/news/3745342/detail.html?qs=;s=56;p=news;dm=ss;w=320;tn=b

Families in Texas are traveling to pray around a tree at a home that appears to show the image of the Virgin Mary and the finger of God pointing to the sky

It's funny how things depend on the eyes that see - to me it looks like something slightly different. I guess this just tells us that the good christian Texans really are good christian Texans...

A

mcadam
Apr 28, 2005, 01:36 PM
Hmmm. Maybe I'll buy both. I wonder what cosmic disarray would occur if you fried up the satan turtle in the virgin mary pan?

Good and bad would equalize each other, a ying-yang symbol would be seen in the frying oil and the world would finally be in harmony... Fellow macrumians - I think we're on to something big here, it's our moral duty to get the pan and the turtle and do what has to be done. So, who's in?

A

emw
Apr 28, 2005, 01:41 PM
Good and bad would equalize each other, a ying-yang symbol would be seen in the frying oil and the world would finally be in harmony... Fellow macrumians - I think we're on to something big here, it's our moral duty to get the pan and the turtle and do what has to be done. So, who's in?

A
Well, I hear turtle tastes like chicken, so count me in.

Of course, all any of us seem to be able to give here is about 2 cents, so it might take awhile to get up enough cash :p

mcadam
Apr 28, 2005, 01:45 PM
Well, I hear turtle tastes like chicken, so count me in.

Of course, all any of us seem to be able to give here is about 2 cents, so it might take awhile to get up enough cash :p

Perhaps if we explain everything to the owners (leaving out the bit with the ying yang) they would donate the stuff to us - we should have a fair chance that they can see the sense in our theory.

A

wdlove
Apr 28, 2005, 05:55 PM
Some individuals are just so susceptible. Jesus is the one to be honored and not the Virgin Mary. Just can't imagine falling for something like this. Jesus said to beware of false prophets. This is something that will spoil. The only real value is if the item could be sold again for a higher amount.

CorvusCamenarum
Apr 28, 2005, 08:52 PM
I love it: religious fanatisism meets rampant capitalism with a dash of stupidity! Wasn't it PT Barnum who said a sucker is born every minute?


Actually it was the Knights Templar who got started with that idea. A law unto themselves, and the world's first international bankers.

But as for this, it's just more proof that stupid people will buy anything, like rednecks at a yard sale.

Mechcozmo
Apr 28, 2005, 08:52 PM
The only real value is if the item could be sold again for a higher amount.

I've got a piece of paper that, after coming out of my printer, miraculously has the image of the Virgin Mary on it. It cost me a few bucks for the Holy Ink™ and the Praying Paper™ but I'd be willing to give it to you...... for a price.

SodaPopMonster
Apr 28, 2005, 10:28 PM
Does anyone besides me think that god it trying to send us ANOTHER message? :D

BrianKonarsMac
Apr 28, 2005, 11:43 PM
Does anyone besides me think that god it trying to send us ANOTHER message? :D
is it a middle finger, a penis, or the virgin mary? the first one seems most likely considering how "religious" religious people really are.

Mechcozmo
Apr 29, 2005, 03:31 AM
is it a middle finger, a penis, or the virgin mary? the first one seems most likely considering how "religious" religious people really are.

If we're talking about priests lately, then the second one you mentioned might be correct.... :rolleyes: