mnkeybsness
Apr 3, 2003, 02:47 PM
quote from david hyatt's weblog (http://www.mozillazine.org/weblogs/hyatt/)
The next release of Safari will be fully embracing Web standards by dropping all support for tables. From now on, any pages that use tables will cause Safari to play a very loud raspberry sound and refuse to display the page.
Auto width tables will actually cause Safari to crash, accompanied by a loud explosion. Safari will then search your hard drive for all files that contain the word "table" and it will replace them with Egyptian hieroglyphics.
For all sites that attempt to nest tables more than four levels deep, Safari will play a loud flushing sound, and it will remove itself from the dock and erase itself from your system in order to protect itself from your bad taste.
I had the opportunity to announce my plans to drop table support to the WASP (We Annoy Safari Programmers), and they applauded the move. "It's high time someone took a stand and stopped supporting these unpredictable monstrosities," said John Feldman, one of the most outspoken members of the WASP. "Who really knows how to build a site using tables anyway?"
Unfortunately word also leaked to the TAG (Table Advocacy Group), and they were outraged. Jim Lerners-Lee had this to say. "I hate all this newfangled crap. XHTML2, XFORMS, CSS3. It's all so complicated. Me, I like tables. Good old-fashioned tables. Especially when used with the blink tag. Safari is obviously taking a dangerous stance by dropping support for tables, since everyone knows they are the backbone of the modern Web."
Despite protests from some individuals, we're not backing down. You'd better get those pages converted. You have been warned.
this IS and april fools joke
The next release of Safari will be fully embracing Web standards by dropping all support for tables. From now on, any pages that use tables will cause Safari to play a very loud raspberry sound and refuse to display the page.
Auto width tables will actually cause Safari to crash, accompanied by a loud explosion. Safari will then search your hard drive for all files that contain the word "table" and it will replace them with Egyptian hieroglyphics.
For all sites that attempt to nest tables more than four levels deep, Safari will play a loud flushing sound, and it will remove itself from the dock and erase itself from your system in order to protect itself from your bad taste.
I had the opportunity to announce my plans to drop table support to the WASP (We Annoy Safari Programmers), and they applauded the move. "It's high time someone took a stand and stopped supporting these unpredictable monstrosities," said John Feldman, one of the most outspoken members of the WASP. "Who really knows how to build a site using tables anyway?"
Unfortunately word also leaked to the TAG (Table Advocacy Group), and they were outraged. Jim Lerners-Lee had this to say. "I hate all this newfangled crap. XHTML2, XFORMS, CSS3. It's all so complicated. Me, I like tables. Good old-fashioned tables. Especially when used with the blink tag. Safari is obviously taking a dangerous stance by dropping support for tables, since everyone knows they are the backbone of the modern Web."
Despite protests from some individuals, we're not backing down. You'd better get those pages converted. You have been warned.
this IS and april fools joke
