Guess Who Wants My Resume

[patrick0brien]

Don't Click Here! (http://www.microsoft.com)

:eek:

This is far too interesting to not toss out here. They approached me!

I've already sent my resume in. My boggle is what the heck am I going to do if I actually score an offer!

I'll keep you posted...

[Mr. Anderson]

Ha, damn funny. But they do make things for macs, Office you know?

So why do they want you?

D

[pseudobrit]

Originally posted by patrick0brien
I've already sent my resume in. My boggle is what the heck am I going to do if I actually score an offer!

Simple... bring it down from within... Mwhahahahahhaa!

[NavyIntel007]

Yeah dude, be a corperate spy for apple.

[boskie]

Install trojans, format their c drives and place half eaten apple's as a calling cards on every desk.

[GeneR]

Originally posted by boskie
Install trojans, format their c drives and place half eaten apple's as a calling cards on every desk.

That sounds like a winner idea to me! Sit tight, become a sponge, vaccuum up all the tidbits of info that you can and share it with the rest of the world.

hee hee hee! ;)

[patrick0brien]

Originally posted by dukestreet
So why do they want you?

-Duke

They're very keen on my consulting experience.

And let's be honest, they need good people. (I hope I'm a good person :D )

[ewinemiller]

A buddy of mine went to work there a few years ago when the tech startup we worked for folded. It's great as long as you are a real MS employee, not one of the contractors. He loves it, lots of really smart people who are passionate about their jobs.

[G4scott]

Originally posted by ewinemiller
A buddy of mine went to work there a few years ago when the tech startup we worked for folded. It's great as long as you are a real MS employee, not one of the contractors. He loves it, lots of really smart people who are passionate about their jobs.

Too bad they have to work under the rule of Steve-o-Ballmer.

The images still haunt me...

[Spock]

Originally posted by NavyIntel007
Yeah dude, be a corperate spy for apple.

Yeah too bad thats against the law.

[wdlove]

Originally posted by patrick0brien
-Duke

They're very keen on my consulting experience.

And let's be honest, they need good people. (I hope I'm a good person :D )

You are a good person patrick0brien! ;) Congratulations on having Microsoft requesting a resume from you, it must give you a good feeling.

I'm sure that the job will be beneficial to your future career and resume. Keep us posted on your progress!

[jefhatfield]

Originally posted by G4scott
Too bad they have to work under the rule of Steve-o-Ballmer.

The images still haunt me...

i know a couple of people who work for ms now (here in no cal and seattle area) and i could tell you the one calling the shots is not ballmer...gee...i guess it could be that guy...that we all fondly know as...oh, no...i can't mention his name here on these forums ;)

but anyway, working for ms can't be a bad thing...you get real IT experience and ms is no longer apple's arch enemy anymore...only that now ms has won the game and has the reputation as the high tech field's 800 lb. gorilla, their low pay for the job title you get...as compared to other companies much less well known...has given the company the name "microserf" by its own employees...take from that what you can figure out

but apple is not known for their high pay either and there are a lot of highly paid people who work in and around silicon valley who once worked for apple and they have a similar attitude..."Hey, you work for apple, therefore, we can pay you way less...for the experience you are getting"

go to ms for the experience and do not pay that much attention to what they pay...your ms mark on your resume can help you land a "really" lucrative job worth your skills somewhere else someday

i have my undergrad bachelor's degree in hr and used to work for uncle sam looking over resumes, so PM me with your info and i can give you some tips

one thing...keep it to one page...not matter what...and good luck:D

[shadowfax]

do they know you post on mac rumors yet?

[guitargeek]

Release their source code.

[MrMacMan]

Originally posted by guitargeek
Release their source code.

Oh hell yes, nah how about something they really would get steamed about, maybe something about Longhorn or heck
The 1024 Bit X-Box encryption! :eek:

Hehe, M$ aint that bad, as long as you work for the M$ MacBU. (business unit)

ahh (http://www.microsoft.com/mac/)

[patrick0brien]

Originally posted by jefhatfield ...keep it to one page...

-jef

I understand this sentiment. However, my resume takes no less than exactly two, and I will not pare it down for the likes of them. If they can't take it, oh, well. I will not compromise myself for a job, because that leads to other compromises.

I will stand on my own two feet.

Jef, I hope you don't think I am angry at you at all, I appreciate your tips and advice. I for one, from the world of companys bigger (yes bigger) than MS, knows the importance of sticking to one's guns.

Originally posted by Shadowfax
do they know you post on mac rumors yet?

Probably. But I've nothing to hide. :D

[shadowfax]

Originally posted by patrick0brien
Probably. But I've nothing to hide. :D
wait till we dig out the dirt when they contact us about all those PMs you "haven't" been sending us.... :p :p :p

[scem0]

change all the 'endl's to end1's and mess around with brackets.

^^ 2 annoying things to fix ^^ :)

[GeneR]

Get in good with the Office development team for Windoze, and then when they're about to ship the darn thing make certain that the default fonts for each application is 18pt (really childlike and cartoony) and a really unusual font at that!

Additionally, intercept memos meant for the the Windoze Office team regarding possible upgrades and new bells and whistles for the Windoze-only version, and make altered duplicate memos to send to the Mac Ofice Business unit instead.

Heck, why not reverse the annoying childish practices M$ has been pulling on Apple users for these last few years?

:D

[jefhatfield]

Originally posted by patrick0brien
-jef

I understand this sentiment. However, my resume takes no less than exactly two, and I will not pare it down for the likes of them. If they can't take it, oh, well. I will not compromise myself for a job, because that leads to other compromises.




good luck anyway...there is no "one" way to land a job anywhere

i have known people who landed jobs with 2 pagers and some with no resume:D

[rainman::|:|]

In the past couple of years 2-page resumes have caught on to some extent. For the sake of presentation, consider going double-sided... on heavier weight paper.

sorry, i do this sort of thing for a living :)

anyway, as to the job, i say go for it. if nothing else, you'll have valuable insight into one of the biggest influences in the industry... good or bad...

plus, think of how good that wil look on a resume... maybe it'll land you a job at apple :)

plus, it'd be interesting to have a MS employee around the boards... if they didn't assimilate you...

:)
pnw

[patrick0brien]

Originally posted by paulwhannel
... if they didn't assimilate you...

-Heck no!

I've had Apples since the ][ Plus.

Resistance is not futile! (I hope :D )

[wdlove]

Originally posted by patrick0brien
-Heck no!

I've had Apples since the ][ Plus.

Resistance is not futile! (I hope :D )

Hopefully they will put you on a project that will support Apple. They may want to take advantage your knowledge in that area!

[jefhatfield]

Originally posted by patrick0brien
-Heck no!

I've had Apples since the ][ Plus.

Resistance is not futile! (I hope :D )

don't succumb...you know bill gates IS darth vader;)

may the force be with you

[GeneR]

Originally posted by jefhatfield
don't succumb...you know bill gates IS darth vader;)

may the force be with you

Don't you mean "Darth Vader is Bill Gates"?

;)

[shadowfax]

Originally posted by GeneR
Don't you mean "Darth Vader is Bill Gates"?

;)

darth vader bill gates is ;)

[wdlove]

So can we put Steve Jobs in as Luke Skywalker?

[shadowfax]

Originally posted by wdlove
So can we put Steve Jobs in as Luke Skywalker?
why not yoda now?

[wdlove]

Originally posted by Shadowfax
why not yoda now?

I see your point Shadowfax afterall Yoda was the master of the force, a teacher of the jedi knight! You are correct! ;) Although would you consider that Luke Skywalker did the fighting against the dark side?

[scem0]

Maybe Woz as Yoda. Steve as Luke. Vniow as Leah?

This is sounding good...

[shadowfax]

Originally posted by wdlove
I see your point Shadowfax afterall Yoda was the master of the force, a teacher of the jedi knight! You are correct! ;) Although would you consider that Luke Skywalker did the fighting against the dark side?

but if steve is luke, wouldn't he have to have a cybernetic hand? quick, somebody figure out which hand it is and try to cut off steve's hand!

[scem0]

violence is not the answer.

:)

[shadowfax]

Originally posted by scem0
violence is not the answer.

:)
mindless truisms don't count as posts!

....oh wait. crap! you got me. ;)

who said anything about violence? you're obviously predisposed with it, since you just assumed it. you should have yourself checked up :p. this could just as well be a discreet surgical procedure. i leave the methods to you.

[GeneR]

Darth = Dark?
Vader = Father?

Thus Darth and Bill Gates in the same name sounds redundant.

However,

DarthVaderisBillGates sounds okay to me.

So does Arthdae, Adervae, isae, illbae, atesgae, sounds okay too.

Gee whiz, I just lost five minutes of my life thinking that one up.
:( :) ;) :D

[scem0]

Originally posted by Shadowfax
mindless truisms don't count as posts!

....oh wait. crap! you got me. ;)

who said anything about violence? you're obviously predisposed with it, since you just assumed it. you should have yourself checked up :p. this could just as well be a discreet surgical procedure. i leave the methods to you.

You, sir, need to learn the definition of vilence.

try to cut off steve's hand!

and if a surgeon told me before an operation "Well, Im just gunna
cut your arm right off, and attach that red thing to that other
red thing" I would be scared... very scared.

I would be more comfortable with "I am going to make a small
incision at the top of the 4th quadrant of your femur, and attack
the outer pulminary artery to the" etc, etc, etc.

So, are you saying we should 'incise' Steve Jobs hand off?;)

[shadowfax]

Originally posted by scem0
You, sir, need to learn the definition of vilence.



and if a surgeon told me before an operation "Well, Im just gunna
cut your arm right off, and attach that red thing to that other
red thing" I would be scared... very scared.

I would be more comfortable with "I am going to make a small
incision at the top of the 4th quadrant of your femur, and attack
the outer pulminary artery to the" etc, etc, etc.

So, are you saying we should 'incise' Steve Jobs hand off?;)

never heard of vilence, but violence i've definitely heard of:
1. Physical force exerted for the purpose of violating, damaging, or abusing: crimes of violence.

it's all in the purpose :p. you make the interpretation. sure, what i said rather connotes more violence than a clinical procedure, but it doesn't mandate it.

[scem0]

Hmmmmmm, vilence.... Never thought I would stoop to that level,
but look at me... Oh well.

[wdlove]

Originally posted by scem0
Hmmmmmm, vilence.... Never thought I would stoop to that level,
but look at me... Oh well.

Why I never thought of you as a violent person! :p

[shadowfax]

Originally posted by scem0
Hmmmmmm, vilence.... Never thought I would stoop to that level,
but look at me... Oh well. you should tape a camera to your forehead when you sleep at night, maybe you're secretly a mass murdered in your sleep as you dream about lilies and insanely attractive women.