First REAL song I've made. Any brutal comments are encouraged!

[Bobdude161]

Besides the Borat Remix I've done, this is an instrumental song that is to hopefully redeem myself from utter humilitaion in my amateur music writing. The song is called "The Liberators". Completely instrumental and the main influence from it, I think, is the MechWarrior 2 soundtrack that came with the game, sounds corny but I loved it. The song is a little short I guess, but that's for you to decide. Please leave all your negative comments in this thread thanks!

Link to song (http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=162539125). And sorry it's on MySpace but it's the only place I could think of to share it. :o

[PreacherKane]

Hello there, big Bob. Nice song. The intro is subtle and warm. The melody is interesting. I like that at about 1.54 minutes it changes to almost an Middle Eastern song.
In my most humble opinion, the sound isn't big enough. I would have dropped some heavy drums after the intro, brought in some real loud rock guitars and then faded with strings, probably cello's, to make tha audience want more. I don't believe in too much negative comments, they don't allow the musician to grow and get better. If your using a Mac and GarageBand, allow yourself to customise the track fully. Add instruments and sounds that normally wouldn't blend and you will make something unique to you.
Speaking of game soundtracks, I really like the Halo music. Loud, powerful and inviting.
Keep doing what your'e doing, and don't forget to watch the sky.!!!!!

Support Your Local Musician on MacRumors:apple: :D .com

[dllavaneras]

Interesting... a bit weak IMO, though. The background music is a bit monotonous, and there's one thing that bothers me about the piano playing. The melody is not bad per se, but the piano is meant to be played with two hands, and that sounds like it was played only with one hand. There's no subtle piano music that complements the main melody, which makes it feel a bit empty. Also the violin-like synth sounds wash out the paino melody, and it's hard to clearly hear either one. The song could benefit from some percussion, not necessarily a battery, but maybe something more symphonic. Finally, if you insist on keeping the one-handed piano melody, it needs a bit more energy, maybe not so many silent spaces (or maybe add a bit to the background music).

Don't get the wrong idea, you have a very good solid base to make that song into a masterpiece :)

[Sutekidane]

It has a good sound to it, but as others say it needs to be more dramatic. I kept waiting for the song to pick up and... it never came. Great start though!

[Counterfit]

but the piano is meant to be played with two hands, and that sounds like it was played only with one hand.

Cough (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piano_Concerto_for_the_Left_Hand_(Ravel)).

I think, in regards to the piano line you have there, you should be a little more careful with the articulations, and try not to accent the lowest note in the melody.

[rdowns]

I agree with the others. Fear not, you don't have to do good music to get famous. Have you tried a crotch shot while exiting your car or shaving your head?

[Bobdude161]

First of all, like to thank all of you on your input. I waited a few days before touching the song so I wouldn't feel rushed to complete it, like if I had a deadline. :rolleyes: Second of all it seems my song has mutated into techno. The first 2 minutes are the same, but it just randomly switches to techno. lol. I don't know how it happened... sounds all right to me though. Very dark in a sense.


Cough (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piano_Concerto_for_the_Left_Hand_(Ravel)).

I think, in regards to the piano line you have there, you should be a little more careful with the articulations, and try not to accent the lowest note in the melody.

Thats great advice. I remember my piano teacher saying this YEARS ago. Too bad my keyboard doesn't detect differing velocities. I'll have to manually do it on GB.

Still a bit more work to do, I suppose, but quite fun all-in-all. :D

Re-link to song (http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=162539125)