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View Full Version : an open letter to those who signed up to complain about the keynote


shecky
Jan 14, 2008, 12:55 PM
hi.

welcome to macrumors.

you just followed along with the keynote and no doubt you have decided to sign up to MR Forums just to vent your frustration with any/all of the following:

1. apple just released a new version of something you just bought a week ago.
2. apple just released a new version of something you just bought 15 days or longer ago.
3. apple just released a new version of something you just bought 7 months ago.
4. apple did not release something you totally expected them to.
5. apple did release something you totally did not expect them to.
6. apple just released something you want to buy and for a good price but with a dumb name.
7. apple just released something you want to buy and for a good price but the black one is $200 more.
8. apple released something you would have bought if only they had told you they were going to release it a few months ago, when you already spent your money on a different product that you have spent on the new thing had you known it was coming.
9. Steve looked sick.
10. Phil Schiller looked bloated.
11. you could not understand Bertrand Serlet's accent.
12. Roz Ho from MS makes you feel funny inside.
13. Jony Ive was too subdued.
14. Steve kept saying "boom".
15. Steve wore the same outfit he wore at the last Keynote.

the regulars here at MR would like to let you know the following:

a. we have heard it all before
b. apple is in a business to make a profit.
c. innovation means new product.
d. just because something new came out does not mean what you have now suddenly stops working.
e. if you knew enough to come here right after the keynote to complain, you should have also known enough to come here before you bought something to find out what the expected announcements might be.
f. apple will often let you return/exchance recently bought product for the new one (within 14 days or so.)
g. if you just ordered something from apple 3 days ago and it has not yet shipped and apple released a new one, you will most likely be getting the new one, not the old one.
h. Roz Ho makes everyone feel kind of funny inside.

other members of our illustrious family will add to this list i am sure.

welcome to apple.

welcome to MR.

we love you all.

fiftydollarshoe
Jan 14, 2008, 01:06 PM
you forgot "wow that device is awesome but only 8GB ! What's that about ? Apple has forgotten its grass roots userbase in only offering 8GB. Also the price is way too much. No one will buy this product I'm mean who would want it ? It needs 160GB hard drive and about $200 cheaper before I buy it. etc. etc. etc. etc."

Aniej
Jan 14, 2008, 01:08 PM
e. if you knew enough to come here right after the keynote to complain, you should have also known enough to come here before you bought something to find out what the expected announcements might be.

Outstanding post, maybe a day early in my view, but more importantly an great post! I think (e) pretty much defines my views on this matter, I could not have said it better myself. As if the number of posts in the last five days asking "should I buy a (insert Apple product here)" were not surprising/frustrating enough, the number of complaints articulated by Shecky boggles the mind.

However, like Shecky said, we love you and welcome. Now enjoy the show:apple:

shecky
Jan 14, 2008, 01:11 PM
Outstanding post, maybe a day early in my view

true, but i was hoping to build up the list with other people's contributions in the 24 hours before the keynote. :)

JML42691
Jan 14, 2008, 01:14 PM
lmao, this should be made a sticky in every forum once the keynote has finished.

t0mat0
Jan 14, 2008, 01:27 PM
<snip>
e. if you knew enough to come here right after the keynote to complain, you should have also known enough to come here before you bought something to find out what the expected announcements might be. <snip>
welcome to MR.

If you knew enough to come here before or after the keynote, you should check check the Buyer's Guide.

PlaceofDis
Jan 14, 2008, 01:28 PM
i got a laugh out of it. sad because its true.

dalvin200
Jan 14, 2008, 01:28 PM
If you knew enough to come here before or after the keynote, you should check check the Buyer's Guide.

as in double check the buyers guide?

i hear ya and totally agree :P

zioxide
Jan 14, 2008, 01:31 PM
Didn't Roz Ho quit?

shecky
Jan 14, 2008, 01:33 PM
Didn't Roz Ho quit?

did she? i did not know that. even so, she still gives me a residual creepy feeling.

macmike47
Jan 14, 2008, 01:35 PM
Couldn't agree more. There's nothing worse than some newbie being all :eek: and :confused: and :mad: because he made a stupid mistake.

Nice post.

tMac85
Jan 14, 2008, 01:36 PM
awesome post. ....

words out of my mouth

JML42691
Jan 14, 2008, 01:40 PM
Couldn't agree more. There's nothing worse than some newbie being all :eek: and :confused: and :mad: because he made a stupid mistake.

Nice post.
Or this:
:(:(:(:confused::confused::confused::eek::eek::eek::mad::mad::mad:

there are times when I wished that there were no smilies with the exception of the apple. (or at least a limit on number of smilies per post)

DAC47
Jan 14, 2008, 01:51 PM
You forgot the best one

.Apple just released a product and you don't like the graphics card

Dimwhit
Jan 14, 2008, 01:59 PM
Quality stuff. It will unfortunately be largely ignored by the very people it was intended for. But if it stops just one stupid post tomorrow...

Crawn2003
Jan 14, 2008, 02:12 PM
Another good one and probably can be added to what you already wrote...

Apple released a new product and in 3 months they are going to lower the price so Apple should give everyone a $100 credit just because of innovation...

And I liked the one a few above my post about the Apple not giving the graphics option, nice touch!

~Crawn

P.S. Congrats too on posting, great post. If I had posted something like this I'd been crucified and been flamed up and down (among other things) until the thread was locked for having this kind of opinion.

GoCubsGo
Jan 14, 2008, 02:21 PM
Albeit funny, an open letter should still exercise some level of punctuation.
Too bad this "letter" and any "letter" that follows suit will not reduce the amount of bitching. This site would not be what it is today if someone didn't complain about something.

iPhil
Jan 14, 2008, 02:26 PM
i got a laugh out of it. sad because its true.



But there'll be someone will be moaning on the issues of the Keynote.. And will last 'til NAB then repeat the cycle 'til WWDC and repeat ..



But you get my drift .. :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

OW22
Jan 14, 2008, 02:43 PM
Well of course in the interest of balance, there are the alternate open letters....

You know the ones where everyone says how wonderful Steve is, How hilariously funny Bertrand was and how he nailed Gates and the MS team, how wonderfully informative Scott Forestall was and just overall how earth shatteringly amazing Apple really is and how far behind the 8 Ball MS really is and how Steve seems to get on so well with the CEO's of Intel, Adobe, AT&T, Wolfram Research and whoever else gets to go up on stage....

But everyone will at least agree that Phil is way too fat!! :D

shecky
Jan 14, 2008, 03:12 PM
This site would not be what it is today if someone didn't complain about something.

thats a good point:

Albeit funny, an open letter should still exercise some level of punctuation.

thanks for keeping the tradition alive! :)

deannnnn
Jan 14, 2008, 03:19 PM
even though I'm only rated as a "macrumors member," i still loved the post =)

IEatApples
Jan 14, 2008, 03:59 PM
Very funny! :D

… and it's gonna make reading the coming (post expo) rush of posts so much funnier! :p

motulist
Jan 14, 2008, 04:02 PM
This post MUST be made into a sticky!

Hmac
Jan 14, 2008, 04:07 PM
Excellent post.

But you forgot about the new Mac user who signs up to shriek about the cost of Apple BTO RAM or hard drives.

Osarkon
Jan 14, 2008, 04:07 PM
This post MUST be made into a sticky!

Yes, can we please get this stickied.

Not that it'll stop most of the newbies who've come here to moan, but it should stop a few, and that's a few less wasteful threads.

Insatiable
Jan 14, 2008, 04:40 PM
GREAT post!!!

ThunderLounge
Jan 14, 2008, 04:45 PM
hi.

welcome to macrumors.

you just followed along with the keynote and no doubt you have decided to sign up to MR Forums just to vent your frustration with any/all of the following:



You know, I just found out why 'ol Uncle Steve gave the thumbs up for the new Keyboards.

It's easier to clean up coffee that gets on it, when it comes shooting out your nose (thanks to shecky up there), than trying to get it out of that "collection" tray.

Thumbs up shecky. I needed a good laugh. :)

TitoC
Jan 14, 2008, 06:57 PM
I know you can't tell, but I am giving you a standing ovation right now!!! Bravo, Bravo! I think your post should be posted at the beginning of every forum topic for the next few days. Maybe something like what you see at the beginning of some software that you buy, with a "I understand the conditions of these terms, etc., etc." kind of thing.

If you're taking additions to this list, here is one from me:
16. You wanted to 'dis Apple and its users by saying such things as "My Microsoft (insert product here) is a whole lot better than your (insert Apple product here)."

JML42691
Jan 14, 2008, 07:05 PM
..16. You wanted to 'dis Apple and its users by saying such things as "My Microsoft (insert product here) is a whole lot better than your (insert Apple product here)."
That CESOwhatever guy yesterday I think was the fastest blocked member yet, he had about 10 anti-mac posts/mac people are tools posts in about 5 minutes, I don't think I have ever seen a member from any forum deleted as fast as he was.

TitoC
Jan 14, 2008, 08:12 PM
That CESOwhatever guy yesterday I think was the fastest blocked member yet, he had about 10 anti-mac posts/mac people are tools posts in about 5 minutes, I don't think I have ever seen a member from any forum deleted as fast as he was.

I know. Another MR member told me about it. It went by so fast, I didn't even get a chance to read his posts. I love reading that stuff. Makes me go all "Ha Ha" inside.

NEENAHBOY
Jan 15, 2008, 01:18 AM
Didn't Roz Ho quit?

She stepped down in June and went over to the Entertainment and Devices division. Craig Eisler is her replacement.

linky (http://www.macobserver.com/article/2007/06/08.8.shtml)

technicolor
Jan 15, 2008, 01:43 AM
Great post!:D

backtothefuture
Jan 15, 2008, 01:57 AM
Best. Post. Ever.

stylum
Jan 15, 2008, 02:53 AM
The definitive newbie post collection.

MacinDoc
Jan 15, 2008, 03:11 AM
Don't forget:

Apple released the most amazing product I have ever seen, a product that could revolutionize the (insert your preference) industry, but nobody will buy it, because it is too expensive (see iPod).

BTW, here's another vote for making this a permanent sticky, this post is just too funny to let lapse. :D

fl-rv-guy
Jan 15, 2008, 01:05 PM
I don't know if this is the place to do it, but I'd like to thank MacRumors for a really slick presentation of the Keynote speech and the accompanying photos. It was close to being there, and was really appreciated. Great job!

Avatar74
Jan 15, 2008, 01:29 PM
One more thing...

Bertrand Serlet's glass eye is kind of creepy.

You know, maybe Steve can make that a running gag... a different comment about Apple staff each time:

"One more thing... Bertrand Serlet is kind of creepy, isn't he?"

"One more thing... Jony Ive we love you, but would it kill you to use a tic-tac?"

"One more thing... Al Gore did not invent the internet. I did."

"One more thing... wouldn't it be great if... ah nevermind."

"One more thing... YOURE ALL FIRED!"

"One more thing... BOOM!" *Spinal Tap emerges from a puff of smoke to play the closing song*

macfan881
Jan 15, 2008, 09:01 PM
1. apple just released a new version of something you just bought a week ago.
2. apple just released a new version of something you just bought 15 days or longer ago.
3. apple just released a new version of something you just bought 7 months ago.

a. we have heard it all before
b. apple is in a business to make a profit.


Those points should go over to the ipod Touch forums man i cant belive the crying going on over there

NC MacGuy
Jan 15, 2008, 09:05 PM
As purely a shareholder, I hope the release of these mediocre products will not hurt my investment. Last year was all iphone, this apple tv redux w. more overpriced itunes product, iphone/touch apps., steve's dream laptop (but not many others), and the best in my opinion - the time capsule. With the cash reserves and intellectual resources I expected much better and by the look of my stock price today - so did others............. Apple is forgetting the core of their success and that's computers. A bit too smarmy they are.

Shannighan
Jan 15, 2008, 09:08 PM
i watched the whole keynote and i dont think i heard him say boom once... idk

dawnraid
Jan 15, 2008, 09:17 PM
lmao, this should be made a sticky in every forum once the keynote has finished.

Definatly, A very good post too.

EricNau
Jan 15, 2008, 09:54 PM
1. apple just released a new version of something you just bought a week ago.

4. apple did not release something you totally expected them to.

9. Steve looked sick.

These seem to be people's favorites this time around (especially number 9, including its complement 9a, which would be "Steve just wasn't as enthusiastic as he should be"). Plus the generic "this keynote sucked!" and the inevitable "It's too expensive."

Great idea for a thread. :D

JonBean
Jan 15, 2008, 11:18 PM
First off, let me say that I really appreciated the live coverage of Steve's dog and pony show. I'm new to MR and after this morning I'm going to buy the bundle just to show my support.

And my other points.... If you watched the stock nosedive this morning as Steve was making his presentation you knew that the world as Mac Geeks know it was being crushed. When the stock got to $163 I couldn't stand it any longer and called my broker. Thank you bitchy geeks.

I think Apple is spot on with the Air. The economy sucks because middle income folks are afraid of losing their jobs or don't have them. If they've got any discretionary income they're buying fuel with it, saving a rainy day, or playing CYA with their home loans.

Meanwhile, the BMW folks look at the Air and don't really care what it costs. They just want the latest trophy. Same for all the other stuff announced today. Apple will make a bundle in the video market. Don't forget what they said about the iPhone. Now selling 20,000 a week?

Now if they would just release 10.5.2

Really enjoy MacRumors
Jon

smueboy
Jan 16, 2008, 12:16 AM
an open letter to those who signed up to complain about the keynote

Nice one shecky!

... of course, they didn't listen (http://forums.macrumors.com/showthread.php?t=414906) ;)

weckart
Jan 16, 2008, 03:33 AM
Yes, can we please get this stickied.

Not that it'll stop most of the newbies who've come here to moan, but it should stop a few, and that's a few less wasteful threads.

On the contrary, this whole thread is just one big moan and the contributors are just bitching like everybody else. :rolleyes:

But hey, if you all are convinced that you're above all of that, knock yourself out.