Girlfriend takes me over school! [Archive]

tkepongo

Jan 30, 2008, 06:17 PM

119576

Jan 30, 2008, 06:20 PM

You could just study with her.

RHD

Jan 30, 2008, 06:20 PM

long story, short: my gf is putting me first over school. she always wants me to be there with her but i dont want to see her fail so i tell her to study for her tests when they come then she gets all moapy and starts saying "you always push me away"

what can i say that will make her get her act together?

Threaten to break up with her if she's not in the top 6 of her class at the end of the year.
It's for her own good.

(PS I'm a girl and she'll thank you when she's older and trying to get a job)

letsgorangers

Jan 30, 2008, 06:21 PM

Threaten to break up with her if she's not in the top 6 of her class at the end of the year.
It's for her own good.

Ding ding ding.

tkepongo

Jan 30, 2008, 06:31 PM

threaten to leave? i'll put that as plan B. Does anyone have any other solution?

xUKHCx

Jan 30, 2008, 06:34 PM

threaten to leave? i'll put that as plan B. Does anyone have any other solution?

I'd put that as plan never to be used. If you start making threats like that it is a slippery slope and undermines the relationship if you ask me.

I would talk to her about how you view the current situation and try and convey why you "are pushing here away" but obviously don't phrase it like that. If possible try out tiredhorses idea.

Prof.

Jan 30, 2008, 06:37 PM

tkepongo

Jan 30, 2008, 06:39 PM

i get all my studying finished at work during the day so... i cant really study with her at night since i got nothing to study

themadchemist

Jan 30, 2008, 06:39 PM

Threaten to break up with her if she's not in the top 6 of her class at the end of the year.
It's for her own good.

(PS I'm a girl and she'll thank you when she's older and trying to get a job)

Hahahaha, eeeexcellent. Oh, how we love the meritocracy.

tMac85

Jan 30, 2008, 06:40 PM

Say... "I don't want to see you fail so I want you to concentrate on your school work and not so much me. I am not 'pushing you away', I love you soo much.

Something like that.;)

They don't call me "Prof" for no reason ;)

yeah something like this.

or study with her. or really explain how this is somewhat upsetting you. or both.

xUKHCx

Jan 30, 2008, 06:41 PM

i get all my studying finished at work during the day so... i cant really study with her at night since i got nothing to study

So you can directly help her with hers. obviously not every night but now and again.

decksnap

Jan 30, 2008, 06:42 PM

i get all my studying finished at work during the day so... i cant really study with her at night since i got nothing to study

Yeah I think the point is you can help her study her stuff. Not that I think that's a great deal for you.

Prof.

Jan 30, 2008, 06:43 PM

So you can directly help her with hers. obviously not every night but now and again.
*gasp*

STUDY BUDDIES!!!!!:p

*anchorman jump*

YAYYY!!!

herr_neumann

Jan 30, 2008, 06:46 PM

long story, short: my gf is putting me first over school. she always wants me to be there with her but i dont want to see her fail so i tell her to study for her tests when they come then she gets all moapy and starts saying "you always push me away"

what can i say that will make her get her act together?

Ummmmm... Just break up with her for being too needy. This is only going to get worse...

Prof.

Jan 30, 2008, 06:47 PM

Ummmmm... Just break up with her for being to needy. This is only going to get worse...
That is the worst advice I have ever heard.:eek:

themadchemist

Jan 30, 2008, 06:50 PM

Yeah I think the point is you can help her study her stuff. Not that I think that's a great deal for you.

Yeah, it sucks for the OP. Especially if the OP does better than his gf in school, and there's always a presumption that he'll manage to pull through. That said, tutoring someone else can be fun--to an extent.

vanmacguy

Jan 30, 2008, 06:50 PM

Stay with her while she studies and read a book or something. But stay out of her way and tell her to concentrate if she starts talking to you.

Cheers.

odagled

Jan 30, 2008, 07:13 PM

Cheat on her with the librarian.

iDAG

Jan 30, 2008, 07:21 PM

You should tell her that if she fails then she would never make it in life. BTW I'm not the greatest person to ask because my girlfriend is in the top ten at my high school. :)

nickster9224

Jan 30, 2008, 09:14 PM

*gasp*

STUDY BUDDIES!!!!!:p

*anchorman jump*

YAYYY!!!

i thought it said study BOOBIES. lmao

ewxlt

Jan 30, 2008, 09:17 PM

Make a study schedule with her....

David G.

Jan 30, 2008, 09:19 PM

Haha, when I saw this thread title in Forum Spy i thought it was going to be something about your GF flying you over your school in a helicopter or an airplane. Silly me.:o

Abstract

Jan 30, 2008, 09:44 PM

threaten to leave? i'll put that as plan B. Does anyone have any other solution?

Make that Plan C. RHD may be a girl, but that doesn't mean she's right.

I'm sorry, but making her feel as though you can leave her at any time -- at the snap of the finger -- is not the answer. If she thinks it's that easy for you to leave, then what you'll end up with are trust issues, a fear of losing you, a fear of you walking away, of you "pushing her away" ......all bad news.

She seems a bit (too) dependent on you, but is threatening to walk away the right way to treat a person who doesn't want to leave you? DUHHHHHHH..........

Just tell her, "Hey, you know what? I think we should either study together at the library, or study separately, but give ourselves 3 hours at night to spend time together."

That way, you'll still get your message across, but by suggesting that you still make time for each other, you're also not pushing her away.

Prof.

Jan 30, 2008, 09:47 PM

i thought it said study BOOBIES. lmao
Well, we know what you can't stop thinking about.:p

letsgorangers

Jan 31, 2008, 08:53 AM

That is the worst advice I have ever heard.:eek:

Why?

While I was joking when I chimed in about breaking up with her, I think herr_neumann has a point. No, don't go and break things off with her right this instant, but there appear to be some larger issues at work here. If she wants to be around you so much that her school work is taking a hit, there's a problem. Maybe she feels like you don't give her enough attention or something. Whatever it is, it doesn't look like it's about school. I'd just sit her down and talk to her and find out what the real issue is. Give her affirmation that you love her and want to be around her as much as possible, but make it clear that her school work should always come first. Or if she's not easily distracted, offer to come over with your laptop (if you have one) and just sit around on your computer or watch tv while she works. That way she gets her work done and you are still there with her.

RHD

Jan 31, 2008, 11:34 AM

You are both still at school and have years ahead of you. Messing up your education over a boy (or a girl for that matter) is not clever, and I know because I did it.

You are obviously very caring of her and I'm sure you both be OK in the long run.
Have a good talk with her and say how worried you are for her that she is neglecting her studies because of you.

galganog

Jan 31, 2008, 12:52 PM

Tell her that she is doign a good job and to get back in the kitchen?

dukebound85

Jan 31, 2008, 12:54 PM

Say... "I don't want to see you fail so I want you to concentrate on your school work and not so much me. I am not 'pushing you away', I love you soo much.

Something like that.;)

They don't call me "Prof" for no reason ;)

good advice buuuuuuut i think you call yourself "prof" lol

Virgil-TB2

Jan 31, 2008, 01:00 PM

That is the worst advice I have ever heard.:eek:Sounded good to me. ;)

Hard to tell, but from what the OP is saying she sounds kinda immature and self-centred. If she thinks he is always "pushing her away" then either he kinda secretly is (or would like to) push(ing) her away, or she is a bit on the paranoid/clingy side as well.

Not exactly a match made in heaven.

Prof.

Jan 31, 2008, 04:03 PM

good advice buuuuuuut i think you call yourself "prof" lol
No. People in school called me Prof cause for some reason, they thought I was really smart.:rolleyes: Plus, I was known to fix relationships.:cool:

Sounded good to me. ;)

Hard to tell, but from what the OP is saying she sounds kinda immature and self-centred. If she thinks he is always "pushing her away" then either he kinda secretly is (or would like to) push(ing) her away, or she is a bit on the paranoid/clingy side as well.

Not exactly a match made in heaven.
Oh, I didn't think about that.:eek:

The love, the clinging, the failing, the pushing - GLAVIN!!!!

themadchemist

Jan 31, 2008, 04:11 PM

Plus, I was known to fix relationships.:cool:

Then shouldn't they call you Dr. Phil? :p

Prof.

Jan 31, 2008, 04:14 PM

Then shouldn't they call you Dr. Phil? :p
I take that as an insult.:p

Dr. Phil doesn't even have a PhD or MD. Well, neither do I but that's beside the point.;)

todd2000

Jan 31, 2008, 04:19 PM

No. People in school called me Prof cause for some reason, they thought I was really smart.:rolleyes: Plus, I was known to fix relationships.:cool:

Oh, I didn't think about that.:eek:

The love, the clinging, the failing, the pushing - GLAVIN!!!!

Pumping is hard...... - GLAVIN!!!

Carry On.......

themadchemist

Jan 31, 2008, 04:23 PM

I take that as an insult.:p

Dr. Phil doesn't even have a PhD or MD. Well, neither do I but that's beside the point.;)

He does actually have a PhD. What he doesn't have is a license...Or credibility...Or integrity...

So my bad for the comparison. Just a little joke.

Prof.

Jan 31, 2008, 04:26 PM

Pumping is hard...... - GLAVIN!!!

Carry On.......
Ummmm... okay, that was random.:confused:

*carries on*

So my bad for the comparison. Just a little joke.
Don't worry, I was JKing :D

ReanimationLP

Jan 31, 2008, 04:28 PM

No cuddling and kisses unless your grades are high enough.

No hanging out at all if you're failing.

Thats personally what I'd say.

todd2000

Jan 31, 2008, 09:19 PM

Ummmm... okay, that was random.:confused:

*carries on*

Don't worry, I was JKing :D

Wasn't random (ok maybe a little for this thread) But you started it :)
http://www.internerd.com/media/frink/wav/pumping.wav

Move along..... :)