Band performance reviews. First of many.

[Renderz]

I've just completed the first of many Band reviews from a photographer's perspective. I have a freelance writer on board so that should up new content. The first review is of a London based band Slashed Seat Affair during their video shoot. Let me know you think, suggestions welcome.

www.terrylee.net/music/ssavideo/

http://www.smugmug.com/photos/360342614_9qSF5-XL-2.jpg

[termina3]

The photography is awesome; the personal close-ups, use of shadow and perspective all combine to give enviable depth.

Your writing, however, is confusing.

Aside from the poor grammar (word choice, tense confusion, redundancy), I can't figure out if you're looking to a) teach others how to approach a band shoot, b) self-promote, or c) promote the band. While there's no problem combining those, the essay goes from teaching to self-promotion to band promotion back to self-promotion/editorializing; you're punishing your reader with illogical transitions.

If your goal is to self-promote (which is fine, and definitely displays business-smarts), clean up the grammar--it makes some cringe to read "I took along my very impressive assistant along."