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MacBytes
Feb 13, 2009, 10:33 AM
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Category: Humor
Link: 10 Ways Microsoft's Retail Stores Will Differ From Apple Stores
(http://www.macbytes.com/link.php?sid=20090213113338)
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Posted on MacBytes.com (http://www.macbytes.com)
Approved by Mudbug

edesignuk
Feb 13, 2009, 10:34 AM
Hysterical :rolleyes:

MacTheSpoon
Feb 13, 2009, 10:47 AM
That was pretty funny. :)

IJ Reilly
Feb 13, 2009, 10:50 AM
The "Excuse Bar."

Very good.

edesignuk
Feb 13, 2009, 10:59 AM
The "Excuse Bar."

Very good.About as good as the "Genius" bar.

stagi
Feb 13, 2009, 11:03 AM
Thats great!

IJ Reilly
Feb 13, 2009, 11:06 AM
About as good as the "Genius" bar.

I've used this service a few times and had a good experience each one. Sorry!

Anyway, mildly amusing at least.

Theophany
Feb 13, 2009, 11:07 AM
Some 'journalists' have way too much time... :rolleyes:

AppleMacTheBest
Feb 13, 2009, 11:22 AM
The Xbox and the RROD cracked me up. MS hardware is a joke.

plumbingandtech
Feb 13, 2009, 11:30 AM
11) Their stores will suck. While Apple's don't*


*Unless some snotnose is hogging up a new mac you want to check out by looking at his worthless waste of time facebook page.

bobsentell
Feb 13, 2009, 11:42 AM
11) Will sell 10X the merchandise of the Apple store.

plumbingandtech
Feb 13, 2009, 11:52 AM
11) Will sell 10X the merchandise of the Apple store.

:eek:REALLY?

....Uh so.

Ford sells 10x more then BMW.

Which car company would you rather be?

stevearm
Feb 13, 2009, 11:59 AM
11) Will sell 10X the merchandise of the Apple store.


Nice! :D

sanPietro98
Feb 13, 2009, 11:59 AM
I think another regulation is that to buy anything in the MS Store, you first pay for it, then you exit the store. You then re-enter the store and pick up your merchandise. This will be used to remind customers that after installing anything, they must reboot their computer before they can use it!

Sijmen
Feb 13, 2009, 12:04 PM
I want less stores where they shovel their crap under your nose with fake plastic shells and taped-on 'screen shots' and more stores where you can actually use the product and get a feel for it before spending three or four figures.

Like right now I'd like to buy a console. My friends aren't gamers for the most part so I can't play with any console (except the Wii, which I already have) to see how I like it. Now what am I supposed to do? On the official web sites they only have some staged pictures of people having fun, and in the stores the only thing they let me see is the box art. Of course there's reviews and forums but I want to see the things for myself. Hand me a controller and let me explore the console.

So, go go go Microsoft!

AppleMacTheBest
Feb 13, 2009, 12:11 PM
I want less stores where they shovel their crap under your nose with fake plastic shells and taped-on 'screen shots' and more stores where you can actually use the product and get a feel for it before spending three or four figures.

Like right now I'd like to buy a console. My friends aren't gamers for the most part so I can't play with any console (except the Wii, which I already have) to see how I like it. Now what am I supposed to do? On the official web sites they only have some staged pictures of people having fun, and in the stores the only thing they let me see is the box art. Of course there's reviews and forums but I want to see the things for myself. Hand me a controller and let me explore the console.

So, go go go Microsoft!

That would be really really bad idea for Microsoft. Till now they've been selling Xboxes because of marketing and buying out developers, typical of MS. If they actually opened up a store and let people try it out before buying, they would realize on what a bad piece of kit it is and no one would buy it. It would put off buyers like nothing.

Actually, as a Apple fan, I would love to see that happen.

So, go go go Microsoft!

Gleadr
Feb 13, 2009, 12:19 PM
the funniest thing would be if microsoft retail stores actually had brushed metal walls that had holes in them XD that article was pretty funny, and i bet there will be more like it soon. I can't wait!!:p

netdog
Feb 13, 2009, 12:23 PM
11) There will be a Zune bar.

t0mat0
Feb 13, 2009, 12:30 PM
11) There will be a Zune bin.


An Amnesty of sorts...

Lisa-Vet
Feb 13, 2009, 12:49 PM
Has Microsoft ever had an original idea?

Eventually their logo will include an apple with bite removed.

kastenbrust
Feb 13, 2009, 12:49 PM
11) You'll be scanned by the genuine advantage tool before entering to see if you've actually got any money to spend.

Sijmen
Feb 13, 2009, 12:59 PM
“How's the store, zune anything nice?”

cjm3113
Feb 13, 2009, 01:03 PM
Has Microsoft ever had an original idea?

No, they are just really good at copying ****. That is why they made what? 20 billion dollars profit last year?

I'm sorry, I'm as big of an Apple person as the next guy (and a PS3 owner mind you :D), but the Microsoft jokes get old. They are obviously very successful for a reason. All the jokes/criticism make Apple "fanboys" look even more like Apple "fanboys."

That said, parts of the article were pretty funny.

pilotError
Feb 13, 2009, 01:18 PM
Continuing with the Life without Walls theme, Microsoft Stores will have windows suspended from the ceiling by wire in the food court of most major malls.

They will have 24 hour support because there's no doors to close.

zag
Feb 13, 2009, 02:01 PM
I have only one question: do I need to buy points or can I use cash? :p

ArtOfWarfare
Feb 13, 2009, 03:25 PM
I have only one question: do I need to buy points or can I use cash? :p

XD

You use the cash to buy points. Then you use the points to actually choose which of their 6 terrible operating systems you want.

Tallest Skil
Feb 13, 2009, 03:28 PM
11. Apple Stores will actually sell product.

Jetson
Feb 13, 2009, 03:42 PM
deleted

Jetson
Feb 13, 2009, 03:43 PM
What's really funny are the angry comments by Microsoft fanboys:

kutts says:
Fri Feb 13 08:26:19 PST 2009
This is the most ridiculous and cheap journalism I have seen in a long time. This reporter has no idea of anything about either Microsoft or Apple and just for cheap publicity and inviting viewers with a slanted title wrote this piece of CRAP.

Both MS and Apple have their own value and atleast MS is humble in its approach to customers.

Please learn to write sensible journalism and not use the Microsoft powered PC to type some CRAP like this.


seilerbird1 says:
Fri Feb 13 08:40:22 PST 2009
You have to feel sorry for Apple fanboys that this is how they waste their lives away proving to the entire world how jealous they are of Microsoft. You could have just bought a real PC to begin with and then you would have a life.


stellis11 says:
Fri Feb 13 08:45:24 PST 2009
Actually, Windows has better security than Mac OS X. Why don't you ever criticize Apple products? I think I'm going to finally unsubscribe from PC World news because it's constantly harping on how great Apple is. I'm sick of it.


:D

spikedscott
Feb 13, 2009, 03:51 PM
I love that article so much, definitely agree with the 'excuse bar' from past experience with vista problems

bluesTank
Feb 13, 2009, 04:09 PM
11) won't sell a bunch of overpriced crap that looks pretty, but you really don't need

12) won't be filled with a bunch of stuck up, annoying high school kid employees who think they are god

rfruth
Feb 13, 2009, 04:15 PM
Rotflmao !

dejo
Feb 13, 2009, 04:17 PM
11) won't sell a bunch of overpriced crap that looks pretty, but you really don't need
Yeah, it'll just be a bunch of overpriced crap that looks ugly and you really don't need... ;)

iParis
Feb 13, 2009, 04:32 PM
Hahahaha! Hilarious! Even the comments are good.
Anybody want to add some stuff to the list?

TheSlush
Feb 13, 2009, 05:34 PM
It's hilarious to see how defensive the Microsoft fanboys got in the comments! It must just be constantly frustrating to be pro-PC. They can't even read a silly blog post without bristling!

rhett7660
Feb 13, 2009, 06:00 PM
It's hilarious to see how defensive the Microsoft fanboys got in the comments! It must just be constantly frustrating to be pro-PC. They can't even read a silly blog post without bristling!

Same goes for apple fanboys............ It swings both ways, lets not kid ourselves.

bluesTank
Feb 13, 2009, 06:26 PM
Same goes for apple fanboys............ It swings both ways, lets not kid ourselves.

I agree. Now I use macs, so you can't label me as a PC fan boy, but I find that the attitude with PC users is that they typically don't really give a *****, while mac users are CONSTANTLY trying to prove that they are far superior (talk about fanboy!). How are you supposed to respond when you are being told basically that what you are using sucks?

kastenbrust
Feb 13, 2009, 06:34 PM
Actually, Windows has better security than Mac OS X

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Funny man.

http://www.roundtripsolutions.com/blog/wp-images/mar2007/mss-windowsnet-090307.jpg

iSaygoodbye
Feb 13, 2009, 06:44 PM
11) Their stores will suck. While Apple's don't*


*Unless some snotnose is hogging up a new mac you want to check out by looking at his worthless waste of time facebook page.

out my apple store they blocked myspace not sure about face book though

galstaph
Feb 13, 2009, 07:03 PM
:D good laugh from that one :D

MisterMe
Feb 13, 2009, 09:00 PM
It's hilarious to see how defensive the Microsoft fanboys got in the comments! It must just be constantly frustrating to be pro-PC. They can't even read a silly blog post without bristling!No sooner said.

Same goes for apple fanboys............ It swings both ways, lets not kid ourselves.
I agree. Now I use macs, so you can't label me as a PC fan boy, but I find that the attitude with PC users is that they typically don't really give a *****, while mac users are CONSTANTLY trying to prove that they are far superior (talk about fanboy!). How are you supposed to respond when you are being told basically that what you are using sucks?

cathyy
Feb 13, 2009, 09:17 PM
It's hilarious to see how defensive the Microsoft fanboys got in the comments! It must just be constantly frustrating to be pro-PC. They can't even read a silly blog post without bristling!

I'll bet we'll see a lot more Mac users getting defensive if the blog post was talking about OS X instead.

DMann
Feb 13, 2009, 09:33 PM
I agree. Now I use macs, so you can't label me as a PC fan boy, but I find that the attitude with PC users is that they typically don't really give a *****, while mac users are CONSTANTLY trying to prove that they are far superior (talk about fanboy!). How are you supposed to respond when you are being told basically that what you are using sucks?

It seems a vast majority of derogatory comments have been, and continue to, proliferate from ex-Windows users, many who have experienced an enormous improvement in productivity, functionality, and overall efficiency after abandoning the Windows platform, not to mention a significant upgrade in user experience. Can't say I blame them, or myself, for that matter.

bluesTank
Feb 13, 2009, 10:05 PM
It seems a vast majority of derogatory comments have been, and continue to, proliferate from ex-Windows users, many who have experienced an enormous improvement in productivity, functionality, and overall efficiency after abandoning the Windows platform, not to mention a significant upgrade in user experience. Can't say I blame them, or myself, for that matter.

I'm an ex-windows user and you don't see me making fun of anyone else for using a PC...

I use my own computer, and whatever other people use is up to them. I don't have to insult their computers in order to feel good about mine.

Seriously, who gives a damn about what other people are using. Why do all mac fanboys feel like they have something to prove against windows users?

Every single freakin time I hear someone in my classes interact with someone using a PC its always "oh I don't know how to do that on your inferior machine" or something along those lines...:mad:

rhett7660
Feb 13, 2009, 11:21 PM
I agree. Now I use macs, so you can't label me as a PC fan boy, but I find that the attitude with PC users is that they typically don't really give a *****, while mac users are CONSTANTLY trying to prove that they are far superior (talk about fanboy!). How are you supposed to respond when you are being told basically that what you are using sucks?

I don't. I smile. :)

DMann
Feb 14, 2009, 01:33 AM
Seriously, who gives a damn about what other people are using. Why do all mac fanboys feel like they have something to prove against windows users?

For many, it's vocal defiance in retort to the several myths which had kept them from switching sooner, such as:

There are so few programs available for the Mac.
Macs are not compatible within the business sector.
Mac's are not suitable for serious computer users, or real work.
Mac's cannot run Legacy programs.
Mac's are extremely limited in function, and do not integrate well in a Windows world.

Hundreds of production hours/year have been compromised for many users due to downtime, defragging, disinfecting, re-installing, restarting, virus and spyware scanning, and installing peripherals, all of which have placed a heavy damper on productivity. For those who have found an alternative, a bit of contempt tends to emerge toward the company in question which endorses standards which are, by comparison, substandard.

MisterMe
Feb 14, 2009, 11:21 AM
I'm an ex-windows user and you don't see me making fun of anyone else for using a PC...

... Why do all mac fanboys feel like they have something to prove against windows users? ....:mad:It is amusing that a Windows user comes to a Mac fan site to accuse the people here of being Mac fanboys. The technical phrase for this is "picking low-hanging fruit."

Is life really so unpleasant at the Windows sites?

AppleMacTheBest
Feb 14, 2009, 11:54 AM
It is amusing that a Windows user comes to a Mac fan site to accuse the people here of being Mac fanboys. The technical phrase for this is "picking low-hanging fruit."

Is life really so unpleasant at the Windows sites?

He said he uses a Mac.

chrismacguy
Feb 14, 2009, 11:56 AM
Shame how us Mac "fanboys" have to put up with this ridiculousness, not that I wouldnt enjoy being paid to write that sort of stuff...;)

rdowns
Feb 14, 2009, 12:12 PM
All customers entering the store will be given a Microsoft branded surgical mask to prevent the spread of virus'.

MacsRgr8
Feb 14, 2009, 02:39 PM
Has Microsoft ever had an original idea?


Yes... To copy Apple.
It really was their genuine original idea... ;)

Denholm
Feb 14, 2009, 07:29 PM
Really looking forward to one of these Microsoft stores opening in my town. ;) Got lots of questions for these Microsoft 'Genius' people. :rolleyes:

MisterMe
Feb 14, 2009, 09:07 PM
He said he uses a Mac.They don't cut-up your Windows fanboy card for using a Mac.

Pikemann Urge
Feb 15, 2009, 12:13 AM
The problem with fanboydom is not that certain things shouldn't be celebrated. After all, there's a counterfanboydom where people pretend like nothing matters and everything's good (preferences aside).

The problem is that people are reactionary and can't keep their mouths shut. Same with religious fanatics. For them, 'truth' matters more than people. For me, people matter more than truth or what computer they use. If I'm asked "What should I buy," I'll answer that all things being equal, get a Mac, and discuss the issue. No big deal.

And if someone who uses a PC needs my help I'll give it. Simple! Some people help you as a means to get you to consider their particular religion or thing or whatever. Be a good neighbour because it's a good thing to do, not because you're softening someone else up to deliver your propaganda message.

iParis
Feb 15, 2009, 12:17 AM
The problem with fanboydom is not that certain things shouldn't be celebrated. After all, there's a counterfanboydom where people pretend like nothing matters and everything's good (preferences aside).

The problem is that people are reactionary and can't keep their mouths shut. Same with religious fanatics. For them, 'truth' matters more than people. For me, people matter more than truth or what computer they use. If I'm asked "What should I buy," I'll answer that all things being equal, get a Mac, and discuss the issue. No big deal.

And if someone who uses a PC needs my help I'll give it. Simple! Some people help you as a means to get you to consider their particular religion or thing or whatever. Be a good neighbour because it's a good thing to do, not because you're softening someone else up to deliver your propaganda message.

I do that, but I'm the other person.
I occasionally ask for help with my PC, I'm amazing with computers so I don't really need help often, I sometimes ask if the person ever has this problem and they say "No, I have a Mac." Damn that pisses me off, because I want a Mac sooo bad.

Come one Mac mini! I'm waiting for you to be updated! GRrr!!!

Luftwaffles
Feb 15, 2009, 04:48 AM
:eek:REALLY?

....Uh so.

Ford sells 10x more then BMW.

Which car company would you rather be?


Well actually, I'd rather be Ford. Why? Pic related.
http://www.atyourcurb.com/images/FordF350DuallyPic2.JPG
I think "Toyota vs. BMW" is a much more appropriate comparison. ;)


Microsoft stores will definitely sell 10 times more than Apple stores. It's inevitable. Then again, their "Excuse Bar" will have 100 times more usage than the average Genius Bar. ;)

rdowns
Feb 15, 2009, 05:30 AM
Wonder how they'll handle all the iPod/iPhone owners coming in who are having problems using it with a Windows box. :D

ogee
Feb 15, 2009, 06:12 AM
I hope some MS Stores are next to Apple stores, so people can go to both and compare.

Then the customers can see just how bad MS software really is.

bluesTank
Feb 15, 2009, 10:24 AM
They don't cut-up your Windows fanboy card for using a Mac.

I never said that mac doesn't make some good quality stuff, nor did I say that Microsoft hasn't had its share of bad stuff either.

I am talking about the attitude. It seems like a lot (not all of course) of mac users I have encountered are stuck up pricks (look at any mac store genius) that feel it is their duty in society to make fun of other peoples computer's.

It is like someone who wears the latest, most expensive fashion clothes (regardless of how good it actually looks) and makes fun of people who wear stuff from Target or whatever, who are actually perfectly happy with their clothes, and the extra dollars they saved from shopping there.

MisterMe
Feb 15, 2009, 11:31 AM
... It seems like a lot (not all of course) of mac users I have encountered are stuck up pricks ....That has more to do with you than with them.

As a Mac user of 20 years and an owner for nearly as long, I have endured life in a World made-up primarily first of MS-DOS users, and now of Windows users. On the job, there is pressure to join the horde. For Windows users, a telephone call brings over an IT staff member to help with the even the least significant of their platform's various and sundry problems. For us, if we don't fix our own problems, then they don't get fixed. However, Apple design and engineering stands the test of time. We rarely have a problem.

A more vexing problem is the fact that we often find that our firm requires mission-critical software that runs only on Windows. Even in the face of growing Mac marketshare, developers abandon the platform. Mac marginalization (http://www.macintouch.com/readerreports/macmarginalization/index.html) is a major topic of discussion on Macintouch.com (http://www.macintouch.com/).

We also endure the profoundly stupid comments from our Windows-using colleagues, friends, and family. Comments borne of simple lack knowledge often open a dialog. Comments borne of fear that we have not joined the Windows herd may degenerate and lead to hard feelings. I like to think of myself as tolerant of those who suffer simple lack of knowledge as well as those who are threatened by my independence. I have converted the former into Mac users. There may be no hope for the latter. However, it is understandable that not all Mac users are so forgiving.

SnowLeopard2008
Feb 15, 2009, 12:04 PM
That article was hilarious. Six entrances? Note to Microsoft: Fix up your crap so you won't be the butt of all the jokes in the tech world.

alphaod
Feb 15, 2009, 05:35 PM
Has Microsoft ever had an original idea?


Did Apple?

DMann
Feb 15, 2009, 07:28 PM
Did Apple?

Seems they did - The all-in-one computer design, the internal floppy drive, the development of Firewire, Quicktime, MacPaint, several innovative features within OS X such as Exposé, implementation of Dashboard, Time Machine,The iPod’s innovative design and integration with iTunes, implemetation of multi-touch in a small hand-held device, and Unibody laptop designs, to name a few.

MisterMe
Feb 15, 2009, 10:07 PM
Seems they did - The all-in-one computer design, the internal floppy drive, the development of Firewire, Quicktime, MacPaint, several innovative features within OS X such as Exposé, implementation of Dashboard, Time Machine,The iPod’s innovative design and integration with iTunes, implemetation of multi-touch in a small hand-held device, and Unibody laptop designs, to name a few.Don't forget AppleTalk, QuickDraw, QuickDraw GX, TrueType, TrueType GX, the single-button mouse, the trackpad, HyperCard, the Newton, and so much more.

Pikemann Urge
Feb 16, 2009, 05:14 AM
Don't forget AppleTalk, QuickDraw, QuickDraw GX, TrueType, TrueType GX, the single-button mouse, the trackpad, HyperCard, the Newton, and so much more.
Bah. That's the past! You're living in the past! Quit living in the past! ;)

MAGICMOXTER
Feb 16, 2009, 05:31 AM
Did Apple?

Not to forget they actually invented the personal computer, or the PC

No1451
Feb 16, 2009, 09:42 AM
That would be really really bad idea for Microsoft. Till now they've been selling Xboxes because of marketing and buying out developers, typical of MS. If they actually opened up a store and let people try it out before buying, they would realize on what a bad piece of kit it is and no one would buy it. It would put off buyers like nothing.

Actually, as a Apple fan, I would love to see that happen.

So, go go go Microsoft!

Fanboys should all die. The 360 is a good console, I bought mine after trying out my friend's and haven't looked back.

A MS store might be nice as they do have some good products that I wouldn't mind trying before buying.

bluesTank
Feb 17, 2009, 12:17 AM
Fanboys should all die. The 360 is a good console, I bought mine after trying out my friend's and haven't looked back.

A MS store might be nice as they do have some good products that I wouldn't mind trying before buying.

I love my 360 as well :)

I also love my macbook and iPhone :D

I also think my wifes Dell XPS is amazing... is the universe going to explode?

roach
Feb 17, 2009, 02:51 AM
It is amusing that a Windows user comes to a Mac fan site to accuse the people here of being Mac fanboys. The technical phrase for this is "picking low-hanging fruit."

Is life really so unpleasant at the Windows sites?

Ha! Ha! Ha! I was thinking the same thing, but opposite! A Mac site with so many thread with Microsoft in its title. It's a case of inferior complex where one makes fun of the other to make himself feel better. The technical phrase for case of "inferior complex." Elementary playground stuff.

ritzuk
Feb 17, 2009, 05:19 AM
Ha! Ha! Ha! I was thinking the same thing, but opposite! A Mac site with so many thread with Microsoft in its title. It's a case of inferior complex where one makes fun of the other to make himself feel better. The technical phrase for case of "inferior complex." Elementary playground stuff.

I have an idea - let's all start pissing into the wind!