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View Full Version : Russian blows off ex-boyf's todger with firecrackers




edesignuk
May 29, 2009, 05:41 AM
It's about time there was another good junk related story...poor fellow...
A spurned Russian woman whose boyfriend declined to take her hand in marriage responded by blowing off his penis with firecrackers, Mosnews reports.

Victim Alik D. had been shacked up with Kira V. for about two years when she began to suggest that they should tie the knot. Mr D declined, and indicated he'd rather go back to his wife and child.

Ms V suggested a farewell dinner, and following "a hearty meal and some heavy drinking", Alik crashed out. Kira then tied said fireworks to his todger and lit the fuse.

Intensive care operatives are fighting for Alik's life. Kira faces 12 years' hard time - even if her ex survives.The Register (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2009/05/29/russian_firecrackers/).

In Mother Russia, you never say no to your woman. [BANG!]



NC MacGuy
May 29, 2009, 07:06 AM
Those must have been some big ass firecrackers. Must've wanted to make sure the job got done.

Sesshi
May 29, 2009, 07:09 AM
Perhaps codpieces need to make a sartorial return after all. For the truly paranoid, armoured varieties...

rdowns
May 29, 2009, 07:32 AM
Hard time? Heh.

iBlue
May 29, 2009, 07:40 AM
Man, that's seriously messed up.

Hard time? Heh.

At least one of them still can.

yg17
May 29, 2009, 08:58 AM
Todger? That's a new word for me.

yellow
May 29, 2009, 09:01 AM
Those must have been some big ass firecrackers.

Not necessarily. ;)

Raid
May 29, 2009, 09:31 AM
Maybe Alik didn't want to marry Kira because she gives the worst bangs ever!

:D

Melrose
May 29, 2009, 09:35 AM
I can't help imagining the outcry that would be heard around the world if a man did something like that to a woman.

Hard time? Heh.
Not anymore.. :D

Yellow: LOL

leekohler
May 29, 2009, 09:38 AM
I can't help imagining the outcry that would be heard around the world if a man did something like that to a woman.


Exactly. And my cousin wonders why her husband sleeps with his hands over his penis all the time. This is horrible. This guy is now maimed for life and some people think it's funny.

Melrose
May 29, 2009, 09:40 AM
Exactly. And my cousin wonders why her husband sleeps with his hands over his penis all the time.

If that's true they need help..

themoonisdown09
May 29, 2009, 09:41 AM
That sounds nice, I think I'm going to try that on myself and see if it's arousing.

Unspoken Demise
May 29, 2009, 09:41 AM
Exactly. And my cousin wonders why her husband sleeps with his hands over his penis all the time. This is horrible. This guy is now maimed for life and some people think it's funny.

The only thing that is funny about this thread is the word 'todger.' Everything else is pretty horrible.

leekohler
May 29, 2009, 09:42 AM
If that's true they need help..

I think after Lorena Bobbitt, a lot of guys started sleeping like that.

But you're right- had a man done this to a woman, the outrage heard around the world would be so loud we'd all go deaf.

iBlue
May 29, 2009, 09:43 AM
I can't help imagining the outcry that would be heard around the world if a man did something like that to a woman.


I thought that too actually, but then I remembered that double standards will always exist, no matter how BS they are, and I didn't say anything.

There are plenty of stories featuring women being horrifically abused. In fact, I'd wager there are more incidences of woman being mistreated/harmed, and that's not entirely fair either.

</devil's advocate, or something>

Melrose
May 29, 2009, 09:45 AM
I thought that too actually, but then I remembered that double standards will always exist, no matter how BS they are, and I didn't say anything.

There are plenty of stories featuring women being horrifically abused. In fact, I'd wager there are more incidences of woman being mistreated/harmed, and that's not entirely fair either.

</devil's advocate, or something>

Right.. I'm not trying to make some political point or anything. I guess if you dig deep enough anywhere you find it.

Double standards are so damn confusing.

leekohler
May 29, 2009, 09:46 AM
I thought that too actually, but then I remembered that double standards will always exist, no matter how BS they are, and I didn't say anything.

There are plenty of stories featuring women being horrifically abused. In fact, I'd wager there are more incidences of woman being mistreated/harmed, and that's not entirely fair either.

</devil's advocate, or something>

Remember that men are far less likely to report being abused by women. It's impossible to get any real numbers because of that.

iBlue
May 29, 2009, 09:50 AM
^ I don't really want to go back and forth on it but I did want to point out that double standards are everywhere.

I think the word 'todger' is what set the humour in motion. Words for penises tend to bring that out in people, as it were.

leekohler
May 29, 2009, 09:56 AM
^ I don't really want to go back and forth on it but I did want to point out that double standards are everywhere.

I think the word 'todger' is what set the humour in motion. Words for penises tend to bring that out in people, as it were.

True enough, but if someone had said vajayjay in a thread about physical abuse against a woman, how many people would be laughing?

Oh- and I'm not meaning to go back and forth. I was just pointing out that men are far less likely to report abuse, that's all. Look how difficult it is to get women to report it.

iBlue
May 29, 2009, 10:00 AM
^ No, I totally hear ya, Lee. :)

themoonisdown09
May 29, 2009, 10:01 AM
True enough, but if someone had said vajayjay in a thread about physical abuse against a woman, how many people would be laughing?


Oprah, is that you?

Abstract
May 29, 2009, 10:05 AM
I think after Lorena Bobbitt, a lot of guys started sleeping like that.


No, Melrose is right. That's pretty weird, unless your hand is always near that area, ready for action.

sushi
May 29, 2009, 10:14 AM
I think after Lorena Bobbitt, a lot of guys started sleeping like that.
But at least she used a knife.

I knew of a fellow in Korea, in a similar circumstance where his GF used a pair of kitchen scissors to do the dead. :eek:

I think the word 'todger' is what set the humour in motion.
Agree.

No, Melrose is right. That's pretty weird, unless your hand is always near that area, ready for action.
I am sure stories like this make some men wonder how soundly they sleep at night. ;)

Melrose
May 29, 2009, 10:18 AM
I am sure stories like this make some men wonder how soundly they sleep at night. ;)
I never understood how that could happen either - I mean, if you're drunk yeah, but just in the middle of the night if someone start touching my stuff I'd be awake before you could say 'pruning shears.' Seriously. Those guys must have the sleep of the dead.

Oprah, is that you?
Close enough. ;)

Blue your avatars get better every time. :D

raggedjimmi
May 29, 2009, 10:24 AM
I can't help imagining the outcry that would be heard around the world if a man did something like that to a woman.


Bingo.
Poor guy, hope she gets a lengthy spell in jail.