Advice on my geography project? (First go in Motion)

Hi,

I was wondering if anyone would be kind enough to give me advice on my geography project?
It was done on Motion and took about 5 hours, but it was my first go!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWFcsjPU3es&feature=youtube_gdata_player
(It's only 40 seconds, take a look! )

There are some mistakes in it that I have noticed, but luckily nobody else did when I was presenting it!:
1) Around the 0:28 mark the camera does not reach the words 'renewable energy' in time.
2) The vignette was fixed to the canvas, not the camera which it needed to be.
3) The voice over was done last minute by my friend, so is far from perfect.

I have to say, on balance, I'm very pleased with it, especially for my first attempt. Onwards and upwards!

(PS - the point of view was part of the project, not necessarily my opinion!)

EDIT: This was posted in the design and graphics forum, I presume the most relevant place? Didn't seem to fit in the video one)

Comet5o4 said:

Looks good to me. Like you already pointed out, it just needs touch-up here or there.

Typically in motion typography like this, you need to be saying the words that are appearing for good flow. The part about the dam would need to be re-read. The audio is a little choppy and there is are too many pauses in a few places, again it about flow. If you need to pause, throw in a graphic or something so that the viewer has something to watch so that it feels like there was a reason for that pause or lag.

I really like that it forms the shape of China, very nice touch because you don't realize it till the end. The music goes well with it too

All in all, great job, just needs a little tweaking.

Click to expand...

Thanks.
Next time, I will probably record the voiceover properly, as this was arranged via email and done in 5 minutes

I agree about the dam bit also sounding a bit 'messy'.