Apple should fight back with some Mac vs. PC-style ads like they had several years ago.
Samsung guy: The Galaxy has a 4.8" AMOLED display!
Apple guy: You look like you're having trouble holding that with one hand. Hey, why is the screen so dim? Why don't you turn the brightness up.
Samsung guy: It is all the way up.
Apple guy: Oh, that's as bright as it goes?
Samsung guy: Well yeah, but it has S-Beam! I can share photos with you just buy touching our Galaxies together.
Apple guy: [confused look] But..I don't have a Galaxy. Why don't you just send them to me as an SMS?
Samsung guy: Okay, just a sec, my phone is frozen. Let me reboot (fumbles with it with one hand and drops it)
Come on Tim Cook, hire me