All iPads My daughter is my star! Help me decide how best to reward her.

I remember getting a couple awards in school one month and my parents bought a toy firetruck.

That firetruck kicked ass!

...since you have disposable income....can I have $499? I did really well at work this month....100% on time!

kolakube said:

I do things a little different in my house. I dont just dish out presents for nothing. I illustrate 3 options. One small present for poor effort, then one for medium effort and a top prize for best effort.

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Why do you reward a poor effort?

RussellJones said:

So just because he buys his 5 year old daughter an iPad for doing well in school, she is going to turn into a slag. Ok then. In all fairness you may be smart, but at 16 you have no life experience. You say girls your your age who started out his daughter with parents like him, how do you even know that, if you didn't like them, you probably didn't know them well enough to know what they got when they were 5 or how there parents rewarded them.

Will people stop telling the OP how raise his children, I think that most parents would agree they would rather their children have nice things and sacrifice there own luxuries to reward their children.

Also whoever said he is going to starve and have to pawn the ipad, not true, Britain has a social welfare system.

Also +1 for iPad mini, would work much better with smaller hands

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Totally agree but for the age of 5? I'd say 8 at least in my opinion

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Brradley said:

Mental. If I did anything good when I was younger I would get a Pokemon sticker, not an iPod, and that was only a few years ago! What is she going to expect the time she does well in high school

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A car.

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darngooddesign said:

Why do you reward a poor effort?

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I think there should be no reward for poor, otherwise they'll think, that they deserve something for " poor effort"

kolakube said:

If my daughter had got 15% for effort (the only column of the report im interested in) then she'd have got a doll and nothing more.

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15% for effort

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15%

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I'm not sure you understand what 15% means. That's 0.15, 3/20, just ****ing low. I don't know how it works in the UK but here in Canada 50% means a failure. Not failure in the colloquial sense, but failure as in not passing, having to do the grade over. 15% is a lot lower than 50%. That's barely gold star for trying level. Not give my daughter a doll most children would never dream of level.

I mean no disrespect, I'd say I'm spoiled myself. I have no problem with kids using technology either, nor am I going to complain about 12 year olds with iPods and cell phones as many people do today, because I know it was the exact same way when I was that age. I'm just honestly worried the message you're giving in terms of what these numbers mean.

ob81 said:

Don't get her an iPad, get her an art table and some paint. Teach your children to produce, not to consume.

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Well said.

Get her a mini or a 200 dollar kindle fire.

All I see here are bad decisions being made by OP that are going to bite him in the *** when that little girl grows up. Below average and mediocre work deserves nothing more than a good job, a pat on the back and a do better next time talk, not gadgets worth hundreds of dollars. Also seeing as OP isn't financially secure, spending this kind of money is extremely irresponsible and only teaching his daughter nothing more than, bury yourself in debt as long as you're happy. Wrong.

At 5 I was playing with Pokemon cards and marbles. Running around outside playing with my friends and a new football. Being cooped up inside the house with technology at this age is going to make that girl a hermit by the time she's an adult. I didn't own a cell phone until I was 17 and up until then, I was perfectly content with not having one.

"I dont just dish out presents for nothing." Yes you do.

"My only concern is she has an incentive to try her hardest and realizes early on that things don't grow on trees for many of us." You're pretty much teaching her the exact opposite.

"I switch on TV and watch spoilts 16 year olds getting given Ferrari's because there spoilt rotten. How could they be anything other?" Those people have the means to support their child's greediness. You don't.

"You're just digging yourself into a hole and you'll end up with a daughter that will want every goddamn thing in the world. " -AlphaDogg

Obviously at the end of the day, you're going to do whatever you want. But I'd reconsider giving her such an expensive gift as a 5 year old does not need one. Buy her a leapfrog with those learning cartridges, if anything, kids love those.

kolakube said:

Just trying to instill the ethics into my daughter she will need.

Ie stick in and work hard and get qualified. I know with no good parenting behind me and no one giving a damn at all I had to do all of this later on in life and it was tough.

Im not trying to make her make up for my mistakes. More give her an environment that will equip her for the journey ahead.

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Respectfully, your ideas of "instilling ethics" are completely misguided. As others have already tried explaining to you - your 5 year old daughter does NOT need a $500 tablet. Once she becomes a teenager, she will have the rest of her life to be glued to electronic gadgets. This does not need to start at the age of five.

Give her something age appropriate that can stimulate her mind and creativity - an art set, a coloring book, a trip to museum, a ticket to a play. Don't give her ridiculous gifts that are not meant for someone her age. iPad is not an appropriate gift for a five year old.

Forza69 and ctyrider are spot on. An iPad is not age appropriate for a 5 year old. Frankly, it's ridiculous. I'm glad I didn't have all this tech as a child growing up. I think an art set would be the best thing.

She is 5....! Give her a new pencil and a book... Talk about first World problems!!

I remember getting 98% as a child and my parents asking where the other 2% was.

If I don't get straight A's, I get punished.

So the reward for getting straight A's and not getting punished.

kolakube said:

Im not very wealthy at all. Infact thanks to the recession and loosing my job ive never been more skint. But it is my duty to reward this.

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Dude please please please do not spend money you do not have to teach your child a lesson about how hard work leads to high tier consumer products. I understand you want to do everything you can for your daughter but children are smart and will learn that aspect of spending money when its not practical from you too.

Get her some of the other things suggested in this thread, and let her know how proud you are every chance you get. but the best you can do for *everyone* is to teach your child realistic rewards for the work produced, and that the feeling of accomplishment is part of the reward, establish in her a good internal sense of value, provide a strong parental role and transfer the knowledge that you care about her deeply and without a price tag. Otherwise what will happen when she hits the real world, does something incredible and even one time doesn't get her... Whatever the 18 year olds version of the ipad is- a new car?

And for people saying its his business... This is a public forum where he asked for opinions. In the end this his decision but as long as its not rude and jerky these types of opinions should be heard as well.

How about the op buys the pad for the family and his daughter can get time on it as a reward? Had a great day in school? Half an hour on pad before dinner. Got int trouble, no pad today. After all, she's 5. Isn't he gonna run out of things to buy for these rewards?

Spend your money however you want. I personally would want to ensure my kid can write with a pencil before letting them learn to type, but that's just me.
The iPad mini is a good choice I think.

An ipad reward for good grades? What the heck she deserves a 32" 4k tv for $5,500 don't you all agree????? She's 5 years old get her a Barbie doll and wrapping paper

Kilamite said:

Nexus 7.

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You're right, she really needs to customise her device more than she needs a simple device with a wide array of apps

Take her to toys r us and let her pick out any toy. Maybe even two.

Dont use your daughters good efforts as a rationalization for buying an iPad. Considering her age I doubt she asked for an iPad

adildacoolset said:

You're right, she really needs to customise her device more than she needs a simple device with a wide array of apps

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She doesn't HAVE TO customize it. She could have an easier to hold device for her smaller hands at a reasonable price.

adildacoolset said:

You're right, she really needs to customise her device more than she needs a simple device with a wide array of apps

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Eh? I hardly suggested it because Android is more customisable.

Nexus 7 is $150 or so cheaper than the iPad mini.

SeanR1 said:

She doesn't HAVE TO customize it. She could have an easier to hold device for her smaller hands at a reasonable price.

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But if the ipad has more and better apps, then that makes it a better device

adildacoolset said:

But if the ipad has more and better apps, then that makes it a better device

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Better is subjective, but it's the OP's money, he certainly will do what he wants.

adildacoolset said:

You're right, she really needs to customise her device more than she needs a simple device with a wide array of apps

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You realize we are talking about a 5 year-old, right?

kolakube said:

One small present for poor effort.

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Why?

Ridiculous

I was honestly shocked when I saw this thread. Like really? A 98% in effort in what pre-school, and your gonna go out and buy an iPad for your 5 year old daughter when you're about to lose your job? I bet like 90% of 5 year olds get a 98% or better for effort in pre school because, hey , ITS PRE-SCHOOL. Im in high school now, and if I were to get honor roll right now, most i would get is probably 50 bucks. This is why people are losing there homes and everything, useless spending. I'm not trying to sound mean or anything, but this is just ridiculous, especiually when your not even wealthy.

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And one more thing, like the poster above me just said, one small present for poor effort, thats rewarding her for doing bad. anyone with any common sense would know that rewarding someone for doing poorly, especially at age 5, will not have any god outcome, so I wouldnt be suprised if your daughter in 5 years from now will be doing bad in school