My life suck.

chrismarle · Feb 15, 2013

Sorry folks, I just needed a place so share stuff about my boring and ****** life.

So, I'm a 21 years old guy who hates his job (in a grocery store) but currently has no choice to work there. Being paid 11,25$/h and working only week ends from now on since I'm going back to school next week, I don't have any choice but to stay at my mom's house.

Since I'm starting school next week, I won't get a real career before being 27 years old which is kinda old for me to start a career and I'm really disappointed.

Also, I have pretty much no friends. I used to have a few but since I dropped school 2-3 years ago, I've kinda stopped to hang out with them. Most of my friends are actually my girlfriend's friends or her brother's. I have one good friend but we were only seeing ourselves at work (since I was working with me) but since he left, I probably won't see him as much.

And what's worst is that my girlfriend left me on Tuesday and 3 years and 3 months of relationship. I think that there are chances that she would take me back so I'm doing everything I can to make that happen. Honestly, I love her so ****ing much. I got back to school because I want to have a future with her and a career to be able to, one day, buy a house and start a family. That's everything I always wished for. She is my motivation. Without her by my side, I don't give a **** about what's happening in my life.

So, that's what I'm doing on a Friday night, complaining on a tech forum about my pathetic life.

demosthenes80 · Feb 15, 2013

Could always be worse. Could be in Syria or starving in the Sudan. Always look on the bright side of life <cue whistle>

P.S. Don't get back with your ex, that's the worst ********** thing you could possibly do.

Krafty · Feb 15, 2013

chrismarle said:
So, I'm a 21 years old guy who hates his job (in a grocery store) but currently has no choice to work there. Being paid 11,25$/h and working only week ends from now on since I'm going back to school next week, I don't have any choice but to stay at my mom's house.

At least you have a job.

I'm a 23 year old college graduate who's umeployed and living with my mom, still. I'm freelancing but its not $11/hr steady paycheck. I've never had a girlfriend or a sex life.

Just like they say, **** could be worse.

A good place to go would be /r/relationships, and other sub-forums for venting.

I just lurk, I have no balls anymore to even post about my problems.

wordoflife · Feb 15, 2013

Just keep working hard. It'll pay off at some point.

ideal.dreams · Feb 15, 2013

Toughen up; let all of the things you think are wrong with your life motivate you to work hard at your job and in school to achieve a better future. It'll pay off.

spork183 · Feb 15, 2013

chrismarle said:
Sorry folks, I just needed a place so share stuff about my boring and ****** life.

So, I'm a 21 years old guy who hates his job (in a grocery store) but currently has no choice to work there. Being paid 11,25$/h and working only week ends from now on since I'm going back to school next week, I don't have any choice but to stay at my mom's house.

Since I'm starting school next week, I won't get a real career before being 27 years old which is kinda old for me to start a career and I'm really disappointed.

Okay, can't help you with the others, but as far as the career thing: The time is gonna pass. When you 27, you can have that career, or you can look back and go, "Damn, I should have stuck it out and I'd have a career now." Sometimes you just have to put your head down and keep pushing forward. One thing my daddy taught me was put your head down and keep working. Best of luck and post back when you 28 and on top of the world!

Or, in the words of Cuba Gooding Jr.,: Early to bed, early to rise, work like a dog, and advertise...

tech4all · Feb 16, 2013

This isn't meant to sound harsh, just putting things into perspective for you.

chrismarle said:
So, I'm a 21 years old guy who hates his job (in a grocery store) but currently has no choice to work there. Being paid 11,25$/h and working only week ends from now on since I'm going back to school next week, I don't have any choice but to stay at my mom's house.

You have a job and place to call home.

chrismarle said:
Since I'm starting school next week, I won't get a real career before being 27 years old which is kinda old for me to start a career and I'm really disappointed.

You're going to be getting an education and will have a career within a few years.

chrismarle said:
Also, I have pretty much no friends. I used to have a few but since I dropped school 2-3 years ago, I've kinda stopped to hang out with them. Most of my friends are actually my girlfriend's friends or her brother's. I have one good friend but we were only seeing ourselves at work (since I was working with me) but since he left, I probably won't see him as much.

Make new friends. And maybe try to stay in contact with that friend that left your job.

chrismarle said:
And what's worst is that my girlfriend left me on Tuesday and 3 years and 3 months of relationship. I think that there are chances that she would take me back so I'm doing everything I can to make that happen. Honestly, I love her so ****ing much. I got back to school because I want to have a future with her and a career to be able to, one day, buy a house and start a family. That's everything I always wished for. She is my motivation. Without her by my side, I don't give a **** about what's happening in my life.

Time will heal. It's not the worst thing in the world.

chrismarle said:
So, that's what I'm doing on a Friday night, complaining on a tech forum about my pathetic life.

That means you have access to a computer. And people replied and care.

rei101 · Feb 16, 2013

That is how 21 actually feels like, I was just the same.

Do not tie yourself to things o be happy (having a girlfriend, a career), because things changes and is easy to feel frustrated and depress when things are not as we wanted. Things will change, we commit errors, we will be lonely here and there.

Have your girlfriend, feel happy and enjoy he moment, you will meet people in your school who feel the same. Join clubs, don't be needy (spiritual vampire), instead be creative and forgive yourself.

I am 37 and started to have a career 2 years ago after 3 college titles. But life is about attitude.

glocke12 · Feb 16, 2013

Life at 45 isnt that much different for me...Working 10-12 hour days during the week leaves me with very little time, interest, or energy to go out and tear it up with people (something I've always felt is pretty much overrated anyway).

To be honest though, you are not in the bad of a situation. You are young and healthy, you have a job and are going to school so it's not as if you are some sort of leech. You are actively trying to improve your lot in life.

27 years of age is not that late to be starting a career...I did not start mine until I was close to 30..started college at 22 actually, finished at 27 and it took me 2 years or so to find a full time position in a company (worked temporary jobs in my industry those two years).

As far as the "not having friends" part, learn to be "your own friend" and be comfortable and confident with yourself and being by yourself and than you will have an easier time making friends. Also, don't be afraid to be adventurous, sign up for group activities of some sort or find hobbies that you think you might like to do, you will undoubtedly find people who share those interests.

As far as girlfriends go, same advice applies...

"Honestly, I love her so ****ing much. I got back to school because I want to have a future with her and a career to be able to, one day, buy a house and start a family. That's everything I always wished for. She is my motivation. Without her by my side, I don't give a **** about what's happening in my life.
"

Also, FWIW, don't live your life for other people, or live to be dependent or needy on other people. Living that way will just leave you feeling let down time and time again. Live your life for yourself first (in a non-selfish way)..

iBreatheApple · Feb 16, 2013

One thing to realize is that by being depressed and inundating yourself in everything that's not going well in your life right now is going to do nothing but make you feel worse. Most all of us have been at points in our life where we feel like things cannot and will not get better. It's hard to rationalize this when you're feeling the way you are but know that it will. It always does... at some point. While it would have definitely been better to start school earlier, you are still young and starting a "true" career before 30 is still great. Just know that you cannot change choices of the past so don't sulk in them.

Also, sitting at the house does nothing for you and your state of mind. Get out and find something to do. You don't have spend money. Go hiking. Or purchase something that will require a one-time payment that you can use all the time; a kayak, for example. I just purchased a nice one for under $300. I can take it in the surf, the bay, the river, etc., and it doesn't cost a thing. Even if those things don't interest you. Get out of the house and occupy yourself. I guarantee it will help.

I commend you for realizing you need to get an education and get your life straight. Many people wait until it's too late; for you, it's not.

chrono1081 · Feb 16, 2013

OP I would suggest job hunting. Lots of times a change in "scenery" helps get you out of a rut.

Try for a state job. I don't know about your state but in PA if you pass the civil service test for a particular job you're put on a list to be hired regardless of past qualifications. This could be a way out of your grocery job.

Kissaragi · Feb 16, 2013

Seems more like your just (understandably) upset that you split up with your long term girlfriend. You will get over it, it just takes time.

Does however sound a bit like youve focused too much on your gf over these last few years. You need to keep up other friendships and solo activities, not just give your life over to one person. Obviously this is just my opinion and theres a high chance im wrong, i certainly dont mean to be insulting.

likemyorbs · Feb 16, 2013

You're not in a bad situation at all. 27 is not late to start your career, it's pretty normal these days actually. I won't graduate college until I'm 25 and then might go to grad school. Don't look at other people and compare yourself to them, I'm doing things at my own pace and I have no regrets. Just take it day by day and stop thinking so hard about it. Things always fall into place, your situation could be so much worse. You have a lot to be thankful for in your life.

Oh, and as for the gf issue. It's over, if you have to force something to work then that means it was never meant to be.

Hastings101 · Feb 16, 2013

Get a dog, your life will improve by like 1000%

PinoyAko · Feb 16, 2013

Me being coming from a third-world country, your life seems great! You are a lucky man!

dma550 · Feb 16, 2013

That's a tough spot, my life was very up and down at that your age too. Add in a failed young marriage and family troubles and you'd have me.

Maybe you;re just a late bloomer, life at 45 is exciting, I feel like it's just starting all over again with some recent DEEP challenges. Its all just a cycle, hang in there!

Mac'nCheese · Feb 16, 2013

You made it to Demi-god in two years. Perhaps you should get off the computer and go make some real friends and stop your complaining.

iBreatheApple · Feb 16, 2013

Mac'nCheese said:
You made it to Demi-god in two years. Perhaps you should get off the computer and go make some real friends and stop your complaining.

Demi-God is an alternate title for a contributor. That has nothing to do with post count. And why are you kicking someone's knees from under them when they are clearly already down (regardless if they brought it on themselves or not)? Not cool, man.

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For becoming a Demi-God and supporting the site, contributing members gain access to the Private Forums and have advertisements removed from the MacRumors front page and the MacRumors Forums. They can customize their profile page and photo album pages. Optionally, contributing members also get their user title changed to macrumors Demi-God, macrumors Demi-Goddess or Contributor. There may be other perks for Contributors from time to time, but these are not revealed to members until they contribute. One of the recent perks Contributors had was the ability to test the MacRumors Forum Spy.

Mac'nCheese · Feb 16, 2013

iBreatheApple said:
Demi-God is an alternate title for a contributor. That has nothing to do with post count. And why are you kicking someone's knees from under them when they are clearly already down (regardless if they brought it on themselves or not)? Not cool, man.

I stand corrected. I thought it was post count. And I'm not kicking someone when they are down. Its what I would tell anyone. some people call it tough love. Not cool? Not cool is not giving sound advice to someone because you're (no you personally) afraid of hurting their feelings. This guy has it pretty good, get off of the boards, man up and be grateful for what you have and change the things you don't like.

iBreatheApple · Feb 16, 2013

Mac'nCheese said:
I stand corrected. I thought it was post count. And I'm not kicking someone when they are down. Its what I would tell anyone. some people call it tough love. Not cool? Not cool is not giving sound advice to someone because you're (no you personally) afraid of hurting their feelings. This guy has it pretty good, get off of the boards, man up and be grateful for what you have and change the things you don't like.

It's not about "hurting their feelings". I work in an ER Trauma Center and see people with suicidal ideations, depression, etc. on a daily basis. Depression is real, regardless of what some might think, and it consumes certain people. I know the OP didn't say anything about SI, but I'm just making a point. Regardless of your intentions, or "tough love" or whatever you call it, you came across very rude. You don't know the person sitting behind the screen and you don't know what kind of hurtful statements can push them over the edge. The OP clearly needs some support. So try to show some empathy or just simply ignore the post.

Mac'nCheese · Feb 16, 2013

iBreatheApple said:
It's not about "hurting their feelings". I work in an ER Trauma Center and see people with suicidal ideations, depression, etc. on a daily basis. Depression is real, regardless of what some might think, and it consumes certain people. I know the OP didn't say anything about SI, but I'm just making a point. Regardless of your intentions, or "tough love" or whatever you call it, you came across very rude. You don't know the person sitting behind the screen and you don't know what kind of hurtful statements can push them over the edge. The OP clearly needs some support. So try to show some empathy or just simply ignore the post.

Support doesn't mean hugs and kisses always. Sometimes people need a kick in the butt. Looking for advice about life on an apple site? Please. Expect all kinds of advice. Mine does come from empathy. I work with people who complain about their jobs all day long. I tell them they are crazy. In this economy, you're complaining about what? The break room is too small. You work four days a week, get paid Well, have insurance, a 401k and sit on your butt all day next to friends. Look on the bright side. This guy has a job, a family, about to get an education, has his whole life ahead of him. Look on the bright side for crying out loud.

Kissaragi · Feb 16, 2013

Hastings101 said:
Get a dog, your life will improve by like 1000%

Unless your allergic to dogs of course

Koodauw · Feb 16, 2013

Well if you want to have a pity party go right ahead. What you stated above as fact simply arent true.

You can find another job. You can start a new career and your own business tomorrow if you want to.

It all up to you to change your circumstances.

That said you prob are battling some form of depression, and having a counselor or someone to confide in right now is probably your number one priority.

roadbloc · Feb 16, 2013

OP. You'll get over her. Your life doesn't suck.

chrismarle · Feb 16, 2013

Thanks for the support. I know my situation could be much worst and a lot of people are probably facing terrible situation that are much harder to deal with in their lives than mine. However, that doesn't mean that I can't be sad about my current situation, I think.

For the job, those of you that suggests that I should check for a new one are right. Recently, I was thinking about going to apply to work in a Rogers retail store. It would be a much better job for my interests (tech, mobile industry). Being a sale man would be a new challenge for me, especially in a domain that I have some knowledge.

Some of you are believing that the worst thing I could do is getting back with my girlfriend. On that subject, I won't talk much because it's getting a lot personal but I'll say this: it's my fault. I've never cheated her. Sometimes I was just acting like an idiot for various reasons. Now, what I'm trying to prove to her is that I'll start to act like a man and not like the lame guy I used to be. It's not much, it's just that I was dumb and it has to change.

Actually, I'm pretty excited to start school. I quit school back in 2010 and this time, I'm motivated to success. The reason I complain here is that most of my (ancient) friends are at University and I'm beginning CEGEP (in Quebec, it's a step between High School and University and it takes 1.5-2 years to get through). It's just that it's a shame for me to be that late.

For the Demi-God title, I decided to pay 25$/year to support and contribute to the website. I love MacRumors and I think that they deserve it.

Oh... And no, I don't want any dog. Just lost ours 2 years ago. She died at 14 and was with us since she was just a few weeks old and I was 4 years old at this time. It still hurts but we have some priceless and wonderful memories with her.

My life suck.

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