Register FAQ / Rules Forum Spy Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read
Go Back   MacRumors Forums > Mac Community > Community Discussion > Politics, Religion, Social Issues

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old Sep 29, 2013, 02:47 PM   #26
citizenzen
macrumors 65816
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Quote:
Originally Posted by decafjava View Post
I hate to say this but it really sounds like an North American issue. Canada is similar.

Here on the old continent, would bat an eyelid at that remark.
Well, we are somewhat repressed and sensitive here in the U.S. I won't deny it.

But that being the case, it pays to be bit cautious in the workplace.

I know some think that's a horrible imposition on them. But really, it's not too much to manage.
citizenzen is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 29, 2013, 02:58 PM   #27
hulugu
macrumors 68000
 
hulugu's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: the faraway towns
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thomas Veil View Post
Depends on the work relationship. I had one female co-worker with whom I used to joke around a lot, who might let me get away with that term. I wouldn't try it with anybody else. Too risky and unprofessional.
Right. It depends on the person and the relationship. I have female colleagues and we make hysterical and juvenile jokes about sex.

On handing a female colleague a 300mm lens, she said: "Wow, it's bigger and heavier than it thought it would be."
"Wait till you see the lens darling." And, she burst out laughing for a good couple of minutes.

But, we've worked together for years and a friendship that knows its bounds and when we can each get away with it.
__________________
I look like a soldier; I feel like a thief
hulugu is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 29, 2013, 11:03 PM   #28
PracticalMac
Thread Starter
macrumors 68020
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Quote:
Originally Posted by citizenzen View Post
S
Here's an idea ... instead of saying that eating the salad looks like an "orgasmic experience" say instead, "Wow. That salad looks really delicious."
That sounds so ordinary, like salad without dressing.

Well, some just don't like any sexy/flirty banter.
There is another at work who we joke to each other much of the time in flirty ways, good fun.

To each their own.

----------

Quote:
Originally Posted by hulugu View Post
Right. It depends on the person and the relationship. I have female colleagues and we make hysterical and juvenile jokes about sex.

On handing a female colleague a 300mm lens, she said: "Wow, it's bigger and heavier than it thought it would be."
"Wait till you see the lens darling." And, she burst out laughing for a good couple of minutes.

But, we've worked together for years and a friendship that knows its bounds and when we can each get away with it.
If women where more at ease about sexual comments, they can make great retorts and will have a good laugh and go about the business.
__________________
FireWire 1394 Intelligent network guaranteed data transfer, 1500mA power, Ethernet compatible
Read: 160 files, 650MB total, FW400 70% faster then USB2
Write: 160 files, 650MB total, FW400 48% faster
PracticalMac is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 29, 2013, 11:17 PM   #29
Technarchy
macrumors 68040
 
Technarchy's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Quote:
Originally Posted by likemyorbs View Post
Honestly anyone offended at the word orgasmic needs to grow up. You seriously think that's a form of harassment?! I think thats completely ridiculous. People need to learn to act like grow ups. I'm not a fan of this rigid politically correct society of your dreams. Sounds uptight and annoying.

I absolutely despise people like the woman in question. If she can't learn to work in a world with adults, just stay home.
That's life in corporate America. Remember when HR only existed to handle your benefits? Now they are a weapon for the PC crowd that gets offended by literally everything.

This is a big reason why I love my smartphone. All my conversations, messages, emails, social network comments and hobby interests are 100% private between me and my device. Cuts down dramatically on encounters with the thought police waiting to file a anonymous discrimination or harassment complaint with "HR"
__________________
Steve Jobs, January 9th 2007, 10:44am: "We filed for over 200 patents for all the inventions in iPhone and we intend to protect them."
Technarchy is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 01:27 AM   #30
citizenzen
macrumors 65816
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Quote:
Originally Posted by PracticalMac View Post
That sounds so ordinary, like salad without dressing.

Well, some just don't like any sexy/flirty banter.
There is another at work who we joke to each other much of the time in flirty ways, good fun.

To each their own.
The key being identifying which is which before testing out the sexual innuendo.

It helps to cut back on the number of horrified looks one receives.

----------

Quote:
Originally Posted by Technarchy View Post
That's life in corporate America. Remember when HR only existed to handle your benefits? Now they are a weapon for the PC crowd that gets offended by literally everything.
Actually, efforts through HR are spurred by lost court cases, not some overzealous desire to spread PC throughout the land.

If you want to blame any institution, blame the judicial system for awarding plaintiffs in lawsuits, not HR for trying to minimize the number lawsuits and damages suffered by the company.
citizenzen is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 06:30 AM   #31
Gutwrench
macrumors 6502a
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Quote:
Originally Posted by likemyorbs View Post
Honestly anyone offended at the word orgasmic needs to grow up.
Actually I think the use of the word is rather sophomoric itself. But to each their own.

Quote:
Originally Posted by likemyorbs View Post
You seriously think that's a form of harassment?!
Continued use of double entendres with a sexual context certainly could be. You want to throw the dice over your job and potential financial future be my guest. You'll often find the people who like to play with fire in the workplace will stand around scratching their head in disbelief when they finally get burned.
Gutwrench is offline   1 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 08:41 AM   #32
splitpea
macrumors 6502a
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Among the starlings
Quote:
Originally Posted by Solomani View Post
I know an openly gay co-worker who has the habit of saying "Dear" and "Honey" to just about everyone he interacts with at work. Now of course, him being a gay man, those terms are meant as casual terms of endearment, not meant to be derogatory at all. Would you believe that upon using such a term towards an OLDER female co-worker (she did not know him very well), he was then summoned to Human Resources with a sexual harassment charge? He was investigated and was forced to defend his actions.
I'd chalk that up to the history of misogyny in the workplace -- an older woman is likely to have started her career at a time when women in the workplace were very condescendingly called things like "dear" and "honey" (and also assumed to be incompetent). I could understand why that might set her off, even if not actually meant that way.
__________________
What's the point of a sig showing the system I owned in 2006?
splitpea is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 09:52 AM   #33
Happybunny
macrumors 65816
 
Happybunny's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: 's-Hertogenbosch Netherlands
Quote:
Originally Posted by decafjava View Post
I hate to say this but it really sounds like an North American issue. Canada is similar.

Here on the old continent, would bat an eyelid at that remark.
I couldn't agree more, IMO this prudish attitude to sex, is more prevalent in the English speaking countries. But I have to agree keeping a work place professional should be the main goal.
__________________
'You cannot undo history, but you can learn from it'
Happybunny is offline   1 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 10:29 AM   #34
citizenzen
macrumors 65816
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Quote:
Originally Posted by Solomani View Post
I know an openly gay co-worker who has the habit of saying "Dear" and "Honey" to just about everyone he interacts with at work. Now of course, him being a gay man, those terms are meant as casual terms of endearment, not meant to be derogatory at all. Would you believe that upon using such a term towards an OLDER female co-worker (she did not know him very well), he was then summoned to Human Resources with a sexual harassment charge? He was investigated and was forced to defend his actions.
Over the years I've taken a number of sexual harassment training courses and can tell you that one of the measures by which something is determined to be harassment is that it is "unwelcome". Did the older female co-worker express to the gay man that she didn't want to be called "Dear" and "Honey" and he persisted to do so?

I sincerely doubt that he was forced to "defend" calling people "Dear" and "Honey" and was instead instructed to call people by their name ... something that shouldn't be too difficult, even for a gay man.
citizenzen is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 10:59 AM   #35
VulchR
macrumors 68000
 
VulchR's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Scotland
Don't forget as well that any comment must be put into a context. If a woman is surrounded by relatively more powerful men all day, and subjected to a litany of lewd comments, then she might find a given comment more objectionable than if she were in an environment which power and the sex ratio is even.

In the end, whether or not a comment is offensive is in the eye of the beholder. If you meant no offense, but caused offense, then all you can do is apologize and promise not to repeat the behaviour. After all, if you meant no harm, you would surely want to minimize the potential for future harm. I honestly do not know of a single person where I work who has not react positively to such an apology & promise (I once made a joke about Germans in the UK to which somebody took great offense. I mean the comment as banter to counter the anti-American crap I get all day, but clearly it upset the person. A (public) apology sorted things out fairly quickly.)
__________________
My first was a Mac+. Now I own an iPhone with 3.5x the pixels, a colour display, WiFi, 512x the RAM, >1500x the data storage, and 100x the speed. And it fits in the palm of my hand.
VulchR is offline   1 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 01:13 PM   #36
Gutwrench
macrumors 6502a
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Quote:
Originally Posted by citizenzen View Post
Over the years I've taken a number of sexual harassment training courses and can tell you that one of the measures by which something is determined to be harassment is that it is "unwelcome".
I agree but would also include the word "persisting".

And also being from California, about every six months The City had us in some type of mandatory sensitive training...be it sexual, gender, or cultural. Boy did white males get hammered in there. Ha ha.
Gutwrench is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 01:44 PM   #37
splitpea
macrumors 6502a
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Among the starlings
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gutwrench View Post
I agree but would also include the word "persisting".
Depends on how blatant it is. A single case of unmistakably grabbing someone's ass or boobs could and I think one could make a very strong argument should be grounds for firing (adults should know that that's totally inappropriate anywhere except one's own bedroom).

Using a word like "orgasmic" is much more subjective, and a firing or lawsuit after the first use would be disproportionate (unless it's part of an already identified pattern of borderline sexual language or harassment and comes after some sort of warning or clear request to desist).
__________________
What's the point of a sig showing the system I owned in 2006?
splitpea is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 01:54 PM   #38
citizenzen
macrumors 65816
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gutwrench View Post
I agree but would also include the word "persisting".
Yup.

Quote:
Originally Posted by splitpea View Post
Depends on how blatant it is.
Yup.

The key word used is "reasonable" ... as in how a "reasonable" person would react to or view the [potentially] harassing behavior.
citizenzen is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 04:45 PM   #39
aerok
macrumors 65816
 
aerok's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
I never had such issues where small comments like ''this food was orgasmic'' got me in trouble.

I often break out such comments on a daily basis and not once in my life have I ahd someone complain to me about it. Not even from very religious people (I know a lot of veiled muslims).

I guess it really depends on where you are and also what kind of person you are.
__________________
Kangmlee Photography Blog
Macbook Pro 13 - iPhone 5S - iPad Air - Samsung Note 8
aerok is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 05:15 PM   #40
thekev
macrumors 603
 
thekev's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gutwrench View Post
I agree but would also include the word "persisting".

And also being from California, about every six months
The City had us in some type of mandatory sensitive training...be it sexual, gender, or cultural. Boy did white males get hammered in there. Ha ha.
That was actually persistent across jobs? I've never experienced issues like that. Also what do you mean with the last part? It was just about racial and sexual issues? I'm just wondering. I look fairly white.
__________________
world's largest manufacturer of tin foil hats, none of that aluminum foil crap.
thekev is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 07:58 PM   #41
Gutwrench
macrumors 6502a
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Quote:
Originally Posted by thekev View Post
That was actually persistent across jobs? I've never experienced issues like that. Also what do you mean with the last part? It was just about racial and sexual issues? I'm just wondering. I look fairly white.
While in California I only worked for a city government, so I have no experience in private industry. We were constantly hammered with sensitivity training over sexual harassment, sexual orientation, and cultural matters. I witnessed the city and department lose millions over a pretty (in)famous sexual harassment case and so the city had good reason to pound us with it, especially considering the predominantly male dominated field we worked in.

As for my tongue in cheek comment about being white...while sitting through hours and hours of that training it always felt directed toward white males. A few classes sometimes got a bit heated which was always a bit entertaining.
Gutwrench is offline   1 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 08:02 PM   #42
fun173
macrumors Demi-God
 
fun173's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Quote:
Originally Posted by practicalmac View Post

couples will go in a box, have sex where the audience will hear them, them come out (i assume not naked), and talk about it.
While it has become gossip in the us, the produces state they have a noble reason.
bahahahahahahahahahaha
__________________
Download the Bitcoin Guide Today!
fun173 is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 09:01 PM   #43
thekev
macrumors 603
 
thekev's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gutwrench View Post
While in California I only worked for a city government, so I have no experience in private industry. We were constantly hammered with sensitivity training over sexual harassment, sexual orientation, and cultural matters. I witnessed the city and department lose millions over a pretty (in)famous sexual harassment case and so the city had good reason to pound us with it, especially considering the predominantly male dominated field we worked in.

As for my tongue in cheek comment about being white...while sitting through hours and hours of that training it always felt directed toward white males. A few classes sometimes got a bit heated which was always a bit entertaining.
Ahhh that just sounds so boring and annoying to sit through. I've never worked for directly for the city or any government, but I am in California.
__________________
world's largest manufacturer of tin foil hats, none of that aluminum foil crap.
thekev is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 09:18 PM   #44
Gutwrench
macrumors 6502a
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Quote:
Originally Posted by thekev View Post
Ahhh that just sounds so boring and annoying to sit through. I've never worked for directly for the city or any government, but I am in California.
Don't let me give you too wrong of impression...there's value to much of the training, at least the first time you hear it. When it comes to sexual harassment and sexual orientation it's all pretty common sense. But you'd be surprised the number of knuckle heads in this world. The cultural training wasn't too informative in my opinion. SF is an international city so I guess it helps when dealing with some circumstances. But it often boiled down to race issues and sometimes the fur would fly.

I've been through so much sensitivity training I'm pretty desensitized.
Gutwrench is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Sep 30, 2013, 10:11 PM   #45
citizenzen
macrumors 65816
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gutwrench View Post
Don't let me give you too wrong of impression...there's value to much of the training, at least the first time you hear it. When it comes to sexual harassment and sexual orientation it's all pretty common sense.
That's been my experience too: mostly common sense.

Though there are some points, such as the need to work with HR on even seemingly small matters or procedural "don'ts" like not promising confidentiality that are helpful to reinforce.

But the training is boring. There's no denying that.
citizenzen is offline   0 Reply With Quote
Old Oct 7, 2013, 08:37 PM   #46
stylinexpat
macrumors 6502a
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Quote:
Originally Posted by PracticalMac View Post
One time during lunch she was enjoying her salad, and I said it must be an "orgasmic experiance". Just just looked at me, and left. Then threatened she will go to boss and accuse me or sexual harassment.

She never once said anything I was bother her
If you were gay it probably would have been acceptable by her lol.
__________________
2010 MacBook Pro 13"
2.66GHz
4GB RAM
200GB Vertex 2 SSD RAID
stylinexpat is offline   0 Reply With Quote

Reply
MacRumors Forums > Mac Community > Community Discussion > Politics, Religion, Social Issues

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Similar Threads
thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
[UK] Cameron to put porn censors on ISPs, ban possession of porn depicting rape 0dev Politics, Religion, Social Issues 50 Aug 6, 2013 04:25 AM
Consumer Backlash Against Apple Maps Surprised Waze CEO MacRumors MacRumors.com News Discussion 147 Apr 18, 2013 11:58 AM
Efforts by Apple and Foxconn to Improve Electronics Industry Labor Conditions Starting to Take Hold MacRumors MacRumors.com News Discussion 60 Feb 4, 2013 09:26 AM
Should I be worried about the backlash from scuff gate? Jacoblee23 iPhone 6 Sep 25, 2012 09:03 PM

Forum Jump

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 08:21 AM.

Mac Rumors | Mac | iPhone | iPhone Game Reviews | iPhone Apps

Mobile Version | Fixed | Fluid | Fluid HD
Copyright 2002-2013, MacRumors.com, LLC