Am I Being Unreasonable? Loud kid next door

jeremysteele · Nov 13, 2014

(TLDR below)

So, I recently (a month ago) moved into a new apartment complex (super nice place, full of young professionals).

My next door neighbors have 2 kids - one is a newborn and the other is around 3 years old. The baby cried a lot at first... but not as much anymore... which I'm fine with (babies cry). The 3 year old, on the other hand, is an issue...

I made a noise complaint a couple weeks ago after she spent 2 hours one night running around, into walls, kicking doors, etc. According to the management, the parents said she had a friend over and was playing loud. Thankfully that ridiculous-loudness hasn't happened again...

...however...

Now she lets out a loud scream every few minutes for about 1-2 hours... every night. It's not a constant scream, just a loud yelp every few minutes. Probably just playing loud or something (doesn't sound like she's getting abused or anything... just an annoyingly loud child)

Thinking of doing another noise complaint - simply because it interferes with my own livelihood and it is nearly every night from 6pm-7:30 or so. The kids bedroom is right next to my living room... so watching TV, reading books, etc is difficult to do with her yelping.

Basically when I come home from a long day I'm stuck hiding in my home office to avoid that noise until 8pm or so, when she finally stops.

---

Part of me really feels like doing this complaint, but another part of me thinks I'm just being unreasonable. I've lived in apartments before and have dealt with noises before (music, talking, bed-hitting-wall-love-making) ... just nothing quite as annoying as this....

And before you say it - I haven't talked to them directly.... I've had bad experiences with that in the past and as a result feel more comfortable going through management.

After the first complaint management told me if I have another issue they would pull the parents in more formally and threaten them a bit... which leads me to believe I'm not the only one who has complained.... but I'd hate to be the one to get a family kicked out... you know?

So what do you think? Am I being the grinch... or does it sound like this is a legitimate complaint?

---

TL;DR: Neighbors have loud 3-year old who yelps really loudly every few mins for 1-2 hours a night. Made one complaint already after a terrible episode. Should I do another, or am I being a dick?

hallux · Nov 13, 2014

Do you have other neighbors that may be hearing the same thing? Are you relatively friendly with them and have you talked to them about it?

senseless · Nov 13, 2014

I endured this in an apartment once. It feels as if your space is invaded and every sound becomes an irritation. The child may have a behavior issue that cannot be fixed. More likely, the parent(s) are mostly absent or clueless.

You are not unreasonable. Try and save for a single family home of your own. Apartment living was a series of aggravations for me.

n8mac · Nov 13, 2014

I have lived in nothing but apartments from 1999 until this year. Kids slamming doors that shake your unit, playing right outside your backdoor, people taking your parking space, stealing your newspapers, the list goes on. I finally got so fed up I moved into a house (rental) and things are sooo much better, and quiet. Would highly recommend as I am paying about the same as some of the apartments I lived in before. Sure I gave up a pool and now have a lawn to mow but the peace is so worth it.

VI · Nov 14, 2014

Yell back. Loudly.

Roller · Nov 14, 2014

hallux said:
Do you have other neighbors that may be hearing the same thing? Are you relatively friendly with them and have you talked to them about it?

Great advice. If you're the only one complaining to the building manager, it'll carry less weight than if other neighbors are unhappy as well. Also consider recording the noise as evidence and bring that with you when you lodge a complaint. As well, take a copy of your lease and highlight the part that mentions the tenants' right not to be disturbed (and/or their obligation not to disturb others.)

richwoodrocket · Nov 14, 2014

VI[emoji769 said:
;20352539]Yell back. Loudly.

This is my suggestion.

Mildredop · Nov 14, 2014

Why on earth does the kid want to yelp loudly for 1-2hrs a night?!

satcomer · Nov 14, 2014

Mildredop said:
Why on earth does the kid want to yelp loudly for 1-2hrs a night?!

One simple word, attention!

TheAppleFairy · Nov 14, 2014

satcomer said:
One simple word, attention!

At ease.

jeremysteele · Nov 14, 2014

hallux said:
Do you have other neighbors that may be hearing the same thing? Are you relatively friendly with them and have you talked to them about it?

Barely even see my other neighbors. About 90% of this complex are young professionals aged 20-35 who all work insanely long hours. Not very many kids here either.

VI™;20352539 said:
Yell back. Loudly.

Did something similar a couple years ago. A Neighbor made loud "nightly-love" noises at 2am every other day... to the point of being obnoxious. In that instance other neighbors had also lodged complaints, but management thought everyone was overreacting. Even tried leaving notes, but the people ignored it and actually got louder.

I took the sarcastic advice of some Internet people and pointed giant speakers at my floor, right above their bedroom, and played incredibly loud nature sounds (was some track I found of African animals like lions, hippos, etc), right at the peak of their "enjoyment". Next thing I heard was "holy )$*%)#"

Never heard a peep out of them after that.

Neighbor next door thanked me about a week later for taking care of that annoyance. Seriously... they were so loud they woke the damn building up.

----

Last night I got annoyed enough I finally yelled "Wahh wahh" loudly back, and that made the kid shut up for about 20 minutes at least.

On the bright side at least she doesn't yell all night.... so there's that.

chown33 · Nov 14, 2014

jeremysteele said:
I took the sarcastic advice of some Internet people and pointed giant speakers at my floor, right above their bedroom, and played incredibly loud nature sounds (was some track I found of African animals like lions, hippos, etc), right at the peak of their "enjoyment". Next thing I heard was "holy )$*%)#"

Never heard a peep out of them after that.

Seems like a good idea. I assume you still have the giant speakers. If you're looking for content to play for the yelping kid, I suggest an audiobook recording of "Go the **** to Sleep".

Best case, the kid goes to sleep. Worst case, the kid learns to swear like a sailor. Or I might have those reversed.

Huntn · Nov 14, 2014

VI™;20352539 said:
Yell back. Loudly.

Yeah, but that abandons the quiet standard.

Noise complaint seems to be the way to go to me. My brother lives in a townhouse and when visiting, all we hear is the tromp tromp, bump bump, pitter patter of little kids running next door. Seems to come with the territory unless you live in a no kids complex, which only seems to apply for retirement communities.

hallux · Nov 14, 2014

I guess I've been lucky with my neighbors, though I only have 3 others I share a building with and the other buildings around me have been generally decent (for the last year, the REAL scumbags got booted out last summer).

Scepticalscribe · Nov 14, 2014

Well, for a somewhat drastic or radical solution I can refer you to the poetry of Harry Graham (who wrote under the pseudonym of Col. D. Streamer) and whose wonderful book Ruthless Rhymes (a work which I must say I absolutely adored as a child, as did my brother) contained a poem which went as follows:

Father heard his children scream
So he threw them in the stream
Saying, as he drowned the third,

"Children should be seen, not heard!"

Renzatic · Nov 14, 2014

jeremysteele said:
I took the sarcastic advice of some Internet people and pointed giant speakers at my floor, right above their bedroom, and played incredibly loud nature sounds (was some track I found of African animals like lions, hippos, etc), right at the peak of their "enjoyment". Next thing I heard was "holy )$*%)#"

Never heard a peep out of them after that.

You, sir, are my hero. RESPECT!

Scepticalscribe · Nov 14, 2014

chown33 said:
Seems like a good idea. I assume you still have the giant speakers. If you're looking for content to play for the yelping kid, I suggest an audiobook recording of "Go the **** to Sleep".

Best case, the kid goes to sleep. Worst case, the kid learns to swear like a sailor. Or I might have those reversed.

This very (perhaps unworthy, but altogether appropriate) thought also occurred to me, earlier, when reading the thread.

Apple_Robert · Nov 14, 2014

Anytime there is an ongoing noise problem, you should be documenting (written and audio) each occurrence in detail and notifying management in writing. It would also be wise to send any contact with the management company via certified letter.

Check your lease to make sure you understand your duties and responsibilities as a tenant. Do not do anything that is going to give management a reason to look at you in a negative light. That means don't retaliate or aggravate the situation.

If you make several complaints to management and they fail to act, call the police and let them know you have a noise problem. A lot of times, the police showing gets results.

If the problem becomes one in which it affects your use and function of your apartment, then you have may have cause to break your lease and move elsewhere. The important thing, is having documented proof.

A good management company will do all it can to address any problems in a forthright manner, as it is more costly for them to get new tenants.

sdilley14 · Nov 14, 2014

Unfortunately this is the "give and take" with apartment living as opposed to owning your own place. In my opinion, pretty much any noise that isn't clearly ridiculous and unreasonable is fair game until 9-10PM. Unless it is flat out screaming for extended periods of time, night after night, or consistent banging on the walls, something like that - I think it is a fair level of noise for an apartment. They're disrupting your quiet time, and you're disrupting they're (fairly reasonable noise level) family/play time by filing complaints.

davidoloan · Nov 14, 2014

Damn 3 year olds. You could always move to the countryside, but then there is always the sound of the cows mooing.

jeremysteele · Nov 14, 2014

sdilley14 said:
Unfortunately this is the "give and take" with apartment living as opposed to owning your own place. In my opinion, pretty much any noise that isn't clearly ridiculous and unreasonable is fair game until 9-10PM. Unless it is flat out screaming for extended periods of time, night after night, or consistent banging on the walls, something like that - I think it is a fair level of noise for an apartment. They're disrupting your quiet time, and you're disrupting they're (fairly reasonable noise level) family/play time by filing complaints.

A noise so loud you can hear it over noise-suppressing headphones from 2 rooms away is a bit excessive. But at the same time, as you said - it is probably their play time...

Did talk to management again today, apparently another neighbor also mentioned it yesterday. We'll see I guess...

---

A few have mentioned trying to do recordings... need to get a good mic for that though. Tried with my iPhone but unfortunately it's little microphone just isn't good enough.

satcomer · Nov 15, 2014

davidoloan said:
Damn 3 year olds. You could always move to the countryside, but then there is always the sound of the cows mooing.

I lived on a farm for 18 years. We never heard cows EVER! However we did SMELL them! Ah the memories of "fresh country air".

kazmac · Nov 15, 2014

unfortunately

OP, I've been going through this for years with our downstairs and next door neighbors who have cost me days at work because noise etc. at all hours. I do not feel you are being unreasonable.

BasicGreatGuy has some swell suggestions.

OP, I would follow BasicGreatGuy's lead or just go back to those awesome nature sounds, it worked once already. I wish you luck.

sdilley14 · Nov 15, 2014

jeremysteele said:
A noise so loud you can hear it over noise-suppressing headphones from 2 rooms away is a bit excessive. But at the same time, as you said - it is probably their play time...

Did talk to management again today, apparently another neighbor also mentioned it yesterday. We'll see I guess...

---

A few have mentioned trying to do recordings... need to get a good mic for that though. Tried with my iPhone but unfortunately it's little microphone just isn't good enough.

Eeesh, that's louder than what I thought. I wouldn't really consider that a "reasonable" level.

jeremysteele · Nov 15, 2014

sdilley14 said:
Eeesh, that's louder than what I thought. I wouldn't really consider that a "reasonable" level.

Yeah... It's just hard because I can hear the parents over there trying to get the kid quiet... so at least they aren't ignoring her. They just suck at parenting

If they were completely ignoring her yelping I would have filed another complaint right away.... guess I just feel bad because their kid is a pain. They are probably fed up with her too.

Guess we'll see what happens.

Am I Being Unreasonable? Loud kid next door

Cancelled

macrumors 68040

macrumors 68000

macrumors 6502

macrumors 6502a

macrumors 68030

macrumors 68020

macrumors 68020

Suspended

Suspended

Cancelled

Moderator

macrumors Core

macrumors 68040

macrumors Ivy Bridge

Suspended

macrumors Ivy Bridge

Contributor

macrumors 65816

Suspended

Cancelled

Suspended

macrumors G4

macrumors 65816

Cancelled

Our Staff