The truth is you can definitely see a difference in colour / refraction on the burned area of the disc (the underside of course, not the label side)
They aren't 'etches' per se, but they are microscopic spiral lines (working from the inside, out) where the dye inside the disk has been bubbled by the laser, creating the pits and lands that the laser reads as 0 s and 1 s. Angle the disk against the light and you can see the difference between Data and non burned areas (all data are ones and zeros, music, files, whatever). So, she's right.
Commercially pressed disks use a completely different method, no dye, no burning. The aluminium reflective layer is impressed with the data pits all at one go as the disk is assembled, so commercial disks look quite different on the underside.
Now: Listen up. View this as an opportunity. Admit you're wrong, aplogise for doubting her, praise her for being right, and let her make it up to you. I will leave you to work out the details 😉