Apple or OS X jokes

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by DavieBoy, Apr 3, 2009.

  1. macrumors 6502

    DavieBoy

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2009
    Location:
    New Jersey
    #1
    I guess I just want to see if any of us have any good apple related jokes or quotes or one liners...

    I don't have any yet but I will try to work on some.

    The only reason I thought of this is because of a conversation I had the other day.

    Friend: What is your favorite game on the mac?

    Me: I dunno, Activity Monitor?
     
  2. thread starter macrumors 6502

    DavieBoy

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2009
    Location:
    New Jersey
    #2
    There was also a Simpsons episode recently that poked fun at apple.

    Mapple Employee: Who dares question the boss we fired 10 years ago and then bought back?

    Comic Book Guy: (at "brainiac bar"): My question is the following statement; Operating system 4.2 has sloppier architecture than a Tijuana ant hill.

    Lisa: 1200 dollars? But I only downloaded 1212 songs! oooohhhh
     

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  3. macrumors 65816

    Lurchdubious

    Joined:
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    Location:
    The Gem State
    #3
    Lol. I like that episode. "I'm sorry sir, that machine is turned off." Homer: "Then why is it glowing?"
    "That light is to confirm that the machine is turned off." lol.


    MAC = Mean Ass Computer
    PC = Piece of Crap
     
  4. macrumors 6502a

    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2008
    #4
    Guy 1: Hey, how much did you pay for that mac?
    Guy 2: $1500
    Guy 1: So it must have a nVidia 8800 and like 4GB of RAM right?
    GUy 2: No, onboard graphics and 1GB of RAM
    Guy 1: So why was it so much?
    Guy 2: The keyboard is nice
     
  5. macrumors 68030

    kastenbrust

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    Location:
    North Korea
    #5
    I dont get it?
     
  6. macrumors 6502a

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    Aug 9, 2008
    #6
    Mac's are so overpriced, they just have the good OS and nice looks, the parts are not that great
     
  7. macrumors 68030

    kastenbrust

    Joined:
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    Location:
    North Korea
    #7
    hahaha some Windows fanboys crack me up
     
  8. macrumors P6

    iJohnHenry

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    #8
    Lisa's last pic should read iBill. FAIL!!!!:p
     
  9. macrumors P6

    twoodcc

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    #9
    yeah that was a funny episode
     
  10. macrumors 6502a

    Keniff

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2008
    Location:
    United Kingdom
    #10
    How many Apple Mac user's does it take to change a Light Bulb?

    Just 1.

    And 300,520 to go onto an Internet Forum and discuss how crap it is, and then contradict themselves and buy one a few days later....

    --

    Stephen Hawking may be a genius, but he is not setting much of an example to kids by just sitting at his MacBook Pro all day.

    --

    I was using my Grandmothers iMac today, when I suddenly found loads of porn.

    To be honest I thought I'd deleted it.

    --

    I've just installed a Princess Diana screensaver, now my iMac keeps crashing....

    --

    My old Apple G3 Tower has become so slow.

    This morning I logged into "Just 18" porno website.

    By the time the first page had loaded, all the girls looked like they were in their mid 40s.
     
  11. macrumors 65816

    Lurchdubious

    Joined:
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    Location:
    The Gem State
    #11
    Oooookaay.
     
  12. macrumors 6502a

    theDUB

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    Location:
    SLT, CA
    #12
    You think of those yourself, Keniff?

    Don't quit your day job.
     
  13. macrumors 68000

    Demosthenes X

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2008
    #13
    :rolleyes: Someone clearly hasn't seen the episode...
     
  14. macrumors 6502a

    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2008
    #14
    I'm not a fanboy, but it's true, I love my mac, but I find it overpriced, we payed $900 for my macbook, and 500 for my sisters laptop, she got better parts, but I got OS X :)
     
  15. macrumors P6

    dukebound85

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    #15
    well its true
     
  16. macrumors P6

    dukebound85

    Joined:
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    Location:
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    #16
    i dont find any of those humourous:confused:
     
  17. macrumors 6502a

    maclover001

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    Location:
    Vancouver, Canada
    #17
    I guess one could make the statement that a sleeping MacBook is breathing while pointing at the pulsing sleep light.
     
  18. macrumors 6502a

    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2008
    #18
    I found the last one funny, the others were not so good.
     
  19. macrumors 6502a

    Keniff

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2008
    Location:
    United Kingdom
    #19

    Oh sorry, but the I thought this was a thread about "Apple or OS X jokes"
    And thats what I did, I don't see you trying to come up with some comedy.
    If you don't like the thread, then don't read it, or respond to it!
    And if you want to say something, get involved and tell us a joke?

    I DARE YOU?!

    ffs
     
  20. macrumors 6502a

    theDUB

    Joined:
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    Location:
    SLT, CA
    #20
    I think you should read this.
     
  21. macrumors 65816

    Lurchdubious

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    Location:
    The Gem State
    #21
  22. macrumors 68000

    Mr. Giver '94

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    Location:
    London
    #22
    I find this to be the best post of the thread. :)
     
  23. macrumors P6

    IJ Reilly

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Palookaville
    #23
    Okay, an actual Apple-related joke:

    Three Apple engineers and three Microsoft engineers are about to board a train to a computer conference. The Microsoft engineers notice that the Apple engineers bought only one ticket between them. The Microsoft engineers ask the Apple engineers how they plan on getting to the conference. "Watch and learn," one of the Apple engineers tells them.

    As soon as the train leaves the station, the three Apple engineers rush from their seats and all squeeze into one restroom. When the conductor comes through the car he knocks on the restroom door and says "ticket please!" The door opens a crack and the one ticket is handed to the conductor. The Microsoft engineers are impressed, and decide that's what they will do on the trip back.

    Then on the return trip, the Microsoft engineers notice that the Apple engineers haven't bought any tickets. "How do you plan on getting home without any tickets?" they ask. "Watch and learn," one of the Apple engineers tells them.

    As soon as the train leaves the station, the three Microsoft engineers hurry for the restroom. A few moments later, one of the Apple engineers gets up from his seat, knocks on the restroom door and says, "ticket please!"
     
  24. macrumors 6502a

    Keniff

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2008
    Location:
    United Kingdom
    #24


    LOL?

    Yeah, good call, you posted up a link!?

    This is a thread is about jokes...
    I think you're missing the point.
     
  25. macrumors 601

    sammich

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Sarcasmville.
    #25
    Rofl.
    Thank you! That brightened my day :D
     

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