Bush Suffers Breakdown On TV, Wins Debate

Discussion in 'Politics, Religion, Social Issues' started by meta-ghost, Sep 30, 2004.

  1. meta-ghost macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2002
    Location:
    San Francisco
    #1
    AP - In a stunning display of raw emotion never before seen on national television, President George W. Bush appeared to suffer a psychological breakdown during last night's square-off with Democratic nominee John Kerry.

    Political commentators were quick to agree that Bush *won the debate.

    Observers first suspected a change in Bush's emotional state when, following a blistering attack from Kerry, a large, apparently wet stain began to appear on the front of the President's pants.

    Laying his head upon the podium, Bush began to speak in a soft, high-pitched voice. *His microphone was able to pick up questions apparently aimed at his father, former President George H.W. Bush, rather than his opponent. "Daddy. *Daddy. *Daddy, why don't you love me? " Bush whimpered.

    Cokie Roberts, in a post debate roundtable on ABC, *stated that such actions "clearly presented a softer, sensitive side" of Bush, *"that every man in America will identify with."

    Moments later Bush appeared to regain his energy, bolting upright and loudly asking "What's a ***** got to do to get a drink around here?" *He then began pounding on the podium while chanting "Jack and Coke, Jack and Coke, Jack and Coke" repeatedly.

    MSNBC's Chris Matthews was quick to point out how the alcohol reference would resonate with "Joe Six-pack," while CNN's Wolf Blitzer heralded Bush's use of "the `N' word," as "an appeal to the hippity-hop generation."

    As Bush crumpled to the floor, his rival, Massachusetts Senator John Kerry, implored the audience to "give the President some air." *Kerry also called out to the audience, asking "Is there a doctor in the house?" a clear violation of the debate rules.

    FoxNews anchor Brit Hume lambasted Kerry for his "patronizing attitude," while ABC's Peter Jennings stated that he felt that "No American watching is going to want to vote for a candidate who doesn't know if a doctor actually is in the house, I'm sure aboot that."

    On CBS, Dan Rather told his network's viewers that the debate was being carried via a pool arrangement of cameras, and that he could not verify that Bush actually was curled up in a fetal position.

    Bush's debate performance was seen by most as dealing a harsh blow to Kerry's presidential aspirations.

    "If a soiled heap of laundry on the floor isn't what we need in our war against those who would do us harm, I don't know who is," stated debate moderator Jim Lehrer.
     
  2. blackfox macrumors 65816

    blackfox

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2003
    Location:
    PDX
    #2
    Your material meta-ghost?

    Damn good regardless, although obviously depressing...

    thanks anyways...
     
  3. meta-ghost thread starter macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2002
    Location:
    San Francisco
    #3
    i wish it was mine. it's from dailykos.com
    i'm beginning to think tonight might be a knife fight.
     
  4. Backtothemac macrumors 601

    Backtothemac

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2002
    Location:
    San Destin Florida
    #4
    Tonight is going to be the ugliest of the debates because it is on National Secrurity. The others will be mild. Expect Bush to attack Kerry and Kerry to swing back even harder.

    Nasty will be a good word to describe it.
     
  5. meta-ghost thread starter macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2002
    Location:
    San Francisco
    #5
    yeah, all of the talk is about how the rules will constrain the speakers. but the thing about that is that it makes any situation of stepping outside all the more powerful.

    there is way too much at stake here for someone to have to stop talking because the little light in front of them goes on. i'm looking for a little chaos...
     
  6. IJ Reilly macrumors P6

    IJ Reilly

    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2002
    Location:
    Palookaville
    #6
    We shall see. The format of the debate is so constrained, that nearly anything the candidates say beyond the packaged answers they already have prepared will be a violation of the rules. I just hope to God that neither candidate tries to bring an unapproved pencil to the debate. I wouldn't want to see Jim Lehrer grabbing it out of his hand and breaking it in half on the edge of the podium. Now that would be really ugly.
     
  7. takao macrumors 68040

    takao

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2003
    Location:
    Dornbirn (Austria)
    #7
    boy i really hope that something dramatic happens because i'm gonna stay up because of the debate and the debate starts at 3 am here
    (i already start to make up my tv 'programm' up untill then )

    are there commercial breaks during the debate ? how many minutes will it take ?
     
  8. krimson macrumors 65816

    krimson

    Joined:
    Oct 29, 2003
    Location:
    Democratic People's Republic of Kalifornia
    #8
    this will be a 2 hour long commercial for both campaigns. they should remove any reference to "debate" from this event.
     
  9. SiliconAddict macrumors 603

    SiliconAddict

    Joined:
    Jun 19, 2003
    Location:
    Chicago, IL
    #9
    Why do they even bother with the façade? I mean it is Thursday after all. Have them hold it in the WWE wrestling ring with Ross Perot as the ref.
     
  10. 3rdpath macrumors 68000

    3rdpath

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2002
    Location:
    2nd star on the right and straight till morning
    #10
    i'm skeptical this debate will be worthwhile. both candidates have agreed to so many rules and regulations that it hardly seems more than a well-rehearsed regurgitation of canned statements.

    i'll be pleasantly surprised if we see some figurative full-body contact.

    as a precaution, i'm removing any small throwable objects from the room...it's the only way i can watch and listen to bush without destroying my television.
     
  11. MattG macrumors 68040

    MattG

    Joined:
    May 27, 2003
    Location:
    Fletcher, NC
    #11
    I'm not even going to watch because I already know what to expect. I've already witnessed 4 years of Bushie's bull**** lies and deceit; I don't feel the need to watch it in debate-format. Besides, I already know who I'm voting for.

    I think I'll watch my brandy new Mr. Show Season 4 DVD that I just got in instead. :cool:
     
  12. solvs macrumors 603

    solvs

    Joined:
    Jun 25, 2002
    Location:
    LaLaLand, CA
    #12
    It was no Mr. Show (I loved that show, BTW).

    But it was fun none-the-less. Kerry actually has me wanting to vote for him, and watching Bush pause so much was pretty entertaining. I liked it when he just said the same thing over and over again. And Kerry's response to the flip-flopping...

    If this doesn't change people's minds about him, nothing will.

    (not one to correct spelling and grammar and such, but it's NUCLEAR, not NUCUELAR)
     
  13. meta-ghost thread starter macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2002
    Location:
    San Francisco
    #13
    a better debate than most expected. bush looked awful...
     
  14. Thomas Veil macrumors 68020

    Thomas Veil

    Joined:
    Feb 14, 2004
    Location:
    Reality
    #14
    Back to the category of satire...

    From the MSNBC/Newsweek web site:


     
  15. 3rdpath macrumors 68000

    3rdpath

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2002
    Location:
    2nd star on the right and straight till morning
    #15
    "Even the simplest tasks remain well beyond his reach."

    such as eating a pretzel...
     

    Attached Files:

Share This Page