Chuck Norris is terrible

Discussion in 'Community' started by AngryLawnGnome, Feb 22, 2004.

  1. AngryLawnGnome macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2004
    #1
    I've seen a lot of those workout machine commercials with Chuck Norris lately. He makes me want to get fat because he's such a bad actor. When he climbs rocks, he does it silly: http://www.chucknorris.com/

    Can anyone back me up?
     
  2. Counterfit macrumors G3

    Counterfit

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    #2
    I suppose the question should be: why do we care? If you have something against him, make your own page :p
     
  3. Inspector Lee macrumors 6502a

    Inspector Lee

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    #3
    Just out of curiosity...

    Do you have a beef against "biggies?" You mention "fat" twice - in the post and in your signature.

    Personally, if I was watching a lot of Chuck Norris commercials , I wouldn't be thinking about packing on 50lbs., I'd be thinking about jumping in front of the nearest train (preferably one with a cattle-catcher on the front).

    Do yourself a favor and kick that sh**box to the curb.
     
  4. gwuMACaddict macrumors 68040

    gwuMACaddict

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    #4
    what are you talking about...?

    i LOVE his painted on goatee... ;)
     
  5. Counterfit macrumors G3

    Counterfit

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    #5
    If I were going to jump in front of a train, I'd choose this. Of course, it helps that it operates in my area (Boston during the week, and in RI, about 5-10 miles from the line on weekends/vacations)
     
  6. virividox macrumors 601

    virividox

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    #6
    he a b movie actor, so what, his movies are fun to watch for a laugh
     
  7. eyelikeart Moderator emeritus

    eyelikeart

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    Metairie, LA
    #7
    One thing about him, he's in pretty damned good shape for his age. I will admit, his beard is a bit odd looking.
     
  8. wdlove macrumors P6

    wdlove

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    Oct 20, 2002
    #8
    I think that his beard looks very distinguished. It takes a lot of work to keep it so neatly trimmed. Goo d for him for keeping his body in such good shape.
     
  9. Counterfit macrumors G3

    Counterfit

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    #9
    The shape and all looks like a normal goatee to me, it's the color that seems a bit odd, like sandpaper kinda...
     
  10. iJon macrumors 604

    iJon

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    Feb 7, 2002
    #10
    hahaha remember sidekicks. if i saw that on dvd i would probably buy it, such a great movie and so cheezy.

    iJon
     
  11. Counterfit macrumors G3

    Counterfit

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    #11
    Hmm, trying to remember....

    Nope, the closest thing I can think of is the Three Ninjas :( What a ****ty set of movies...
     
  12. Inspector Lee macrumors 6502a

    Inspector Lee

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    #12


    That has to be the slickest train I have ever seen bar none. There exist 2 prerequisites if one plans on leaping in front of it:

    1) You have to be wearing a suit
    2) You must have a smoke going on impact.

    I can see the job posting for operators - "potential candidate must be willing to be coked up 24-7..."
     
  13. MrMacMan macrumors 604

    MrMacMan

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    1 Block away from NYC.
    #13
    I agree he is terrible.

    I don't know, any of his movies... cheezy cheese w/ cheese and hold the cheddar, cause is bites.


    :p
     
  14. whocares macrumors 65816

    whocares

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    #14
    No, No! You want to throw yourself under this one.
    It's the fastest train in the world (record of 313mph - commercial speed of 185+ mph :eek: ).
     

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  15. latergator116 macrumors 68000

    latergator116

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    Sep 30, 2003
    Location:
    Providence, RI
    #15
    Yeah, those things go realy fast. I was in the Kingston (RI) trains station and you could feel the whole station shake as the train went by. It must have been doing at least 125mph. I've actually been in the older diesel style Amtrak train that they have now retired on the northeast corridor. got to pull the horn too!:p

    As for Chuck Norris, I think he is *ok*. Has anybody ever seen Walker Texas Ranger? I loved that show... though it was very easy predict what would happen next.
     
  16. Counterfit macrumors G3

    Counterfit

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    #16
    Funny thing is, I've been on the TGVm but not the Acela :p I don't think we ever made it up to 180MPH from Paris -> Lyon or Grenoble -> Paris, but it was still damned fast.
     
  17. whocares macrumors 65816

    whocares

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    #17
    Considering its about 280 miles between Paris and Lyon and it takes less than 2 hours, that's an average speed of 140mph. This is including the really slow exit from Paris and slowing down into Lyon. So I guess you must have gotten pretty damn close to 180mph :eek: ;) :p

    <even more OT, sorry>
    Did you go to Grenoble? I spent 3 years studying there (or should I say three years snowborading?).
    What did you do there, if it's ok to ask?
    </OT>
     
  18. Counterfit macrumors G3

    Counterfit

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    #18
    It's perfectly fine to ask, but better suited to another thread or PM :)
     
  19. Judo macrumors regular

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    New Zealand
    #19
    You guys should watch out.

    He'll kick all your asses
     
  20. themadchemist macrumors 68030

    themadchemist

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    Chi Town
    #20
    I followed the link and I noticed his "Farewell Letter to Walker, Texas Ranger Fans." I have included it here for your pleasure and delight.

    First let's look at grammar. "I know the let down of Walker being over will be very emotionally hard on me, just as it did when I retired as a fighter..." When what did? And "did"? There was nothing doing anything. Something WAS. It WAS emotionally hard for you. Get a tutor for your press people, for goodness sakes!

    But it doesn't end there. "I hope whenever my acting career goes that I will still have your support!" I guess this one is dubious. I assumed he meant "wherever" but that he didn't have a good command of English (nor did his minions). HOWEVER, maybe this is an implicit, subliminal even, admission that his acting career is stalled right now. Maybe he is asking for support when it gets going, which will likely be never.

    But what's most disturbing is the whole thrust of the letter. Not that he's a role model to anyone really (well, you never know; after all, I'm sure there are kids out there to whom Tyson and R. Kelly are role models), but think of what he's advocating. That's right kids, prestige and being on top are the most important things. If something requires a risk, avoid it. End on top and don't take a chance. What kind of excuse is that?! I was afraid I was going to suck, so I quit!

    Jeez, I'm going to quit now, because my rant's been reasoned thus far, and maybe it will be if I continue, but then again, maybe it won't.
     
  21. vollspacken macrumors 65816

    vollspacken

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    #21
    there is a guy in my hometown who makes his living by being a CHUCK NORRIS IMPERSONATOR!!! can you believe that??? no kidding, we have a newspaper article about that guy (a former truck driver) on the bathroom wall next to the toilet seat...

    mawharharhar, and this is not a joke (but all my friends are laughing their heads off, everytime they have to go our bathroom...

    vSpacken
     
  22. AngryLawnGnome thread starter macrumors regular

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    Jan 5, 2004
    #22
    I certainly don't. I myself am fat, and enjoy it. Chuck Norris, though, gets me steamed, not because of his good body for his age but for his ruining cowboy hats. To tell you the truth, I just think he's a big goon with a silly beard. I wanted to post his site because of what he says when the site opens - it's simply unecessary and ridiculous. You're advice to Chuck fans, I feel, is well thought out and a good idea. Those cattle catching things are a funny idea, that a train would just catch a cow that wanders onto the tracks.
     
  23. Counterfit macrumors G3

    Counterfit

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    #23
    Oh he could/ But would he? ;)

    lawngnome: those cattle catchers were there to *gasp* CATCH CATTLE! :eek: Well, not much use for them anymore, seeing as there aren't 60 million buffalo roaming the plains anymore...
     
  24. Gaffa Bug macrumors newbie

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    Feb 27, 2004
    #24
    Re: Chuck Norris is terrible

    This is the all time funniest post I've seen anywhere!
     
  25. JamesDPS macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2004
    Location:
    Irvine, CA
    #25
    angrylawngnome, I agree... acting so bad, should be tried for Crimes Against Humanity. But that's why we have hundreds of channels to choose from! Just block the ones he's on :D (Yes, I choose to deal with problems by ignoring them and pretending they don't exist).
     

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