I had the same problem with this game, all of which you guys have described. However after a real ballache which involved copying files from a Windows version I had (it's not a native port, just cider wrapped), I've got it working on Mid-2012 MacBook Pro without any online problems, graphics problems or crashing problems.
What I did took weeks to do and I don't have the memory to backtrack everything. Therefore what I'd like to do is upload it as a private torrent and email people the torrent file.
Mods, PLEASE can you let me know if this is acceptable? I've been in trouble before for breaking the forum rules with torrents, but EA are a crap company and they've stopped support of this. I want to share this great game with other members of MR and all I can think of doing is uploading the .app file to do this.
If you guys could also PM me I'll be happy to zip up the app and email you, or whatever. I don't know, I can just tell you my copy works after weeks of ballache and I sincerely hope it works for you as well, so it can't hurt if I share it with you.
Please flag/quote this so mods can let us know what would be acceptable.
EDIT: mid 2012 MBP, 650M, OS X 10.8