Critique my Song

[bowens]

I just recorded a song that I had written a while back. I've never been on this side of recording before. I have recorded some stuff before but I didn't have to do any of the mixing or any of that. So please, anybody that has more experience than me, tell me what I'm doing wrong or right or anything that can be improved. Here is the link to the song. http://www.macjams.com/song/24308

I'm hoping to get another one up this afternoon. I'll post it here if I do.

 

[bowens]

I just added two more. Everything to Me and The End

Please tell me what you think.

 

[chasemac]

I just recorded a song that I had written a while back. I've never been on this side of recording before. I have recorded some stuff before but I didn't have to do any of the mixing or any of that. So please, anybody that has more experience than me, tell me what I'm doing wrong or right or anything that can be improved. Here is the link to the song. http://www.macjams.com/song/24308

I'm hoping to get another one up this afternoon. I'll post it here if I do.

I think you have done a pretty good job here. One thing I noticed is when the backup vocals come in they kind of jumped out and startled me. Maybe, bring that part down a bit with some reverb added to give some depth. Nice job.

 

[calculus]

Well it's nicely recorded and well played and sung. For me there are a couple of points where it sounds as if you are trying to cram in too many syllables. Also it could do with a middle eight to add some variety.

 

[bowens]

Well it's nicely recorded and well played and sung. For me there are a couple of points where it sounds as if you are trying to cram in too many syllables. Also it could do with a middle eight to add some variety.

Thanks. I know it's kind of repetitive, but it is a praise song for church so it really needs to be. It was meant to be simple and easy. I know what you mean about the syllables, but I couldn't find a better way to fit in what I wanted to say.

 

[e-clipse]

The song itself is great! The recording is really good. I think the recording could use a little more depth. Like maybe a vocal reverb or slight delay on the tail end. I am hearing Jars of Clay when I hear this track. ...Wonderful job!

 

[e-clipse]

Everything to me has a great message of love built through HIM. This song could definitely make it on a young adult Christian radio station. Here in Nashville, we have a radio station named WAY FM. This song needs more accompaniment and back up harmonies on the chorus. I really love your voice.

 

[e-clipse]

The End reminds me of Soundgarden, STP, RATM,and Filter. The track itself is arranged well, but is missing the rage of the guitars. The vocals need to be saturated with layers of warm distortion. I dig the track.

 

[bowens]

I just posted a new song. I didn't want to start a new thread for it, so I just brought this one back. This one is called Prey. It's kind of acoustic rock style. Please let me know what you think.

 

[zimv20]

Prey.

i'm going to comment what i heard sound-wise, not song-wise....

the best thing you've got going on is your voice, it's got a really nice quality to it. processing-wise, i think there's too much reverb. i think you'd do better by playing with some very small and subtle delays to create some space around it, so you can back off the reverb. i also don't think the mic you're using is doing your voice any favors, it's not capturing what would probably be a very nice body and i can hear too much sibilance.

sounds to me that your levels were too low on the acoustic and you're not getting enough signal to noise. i.e. the acoustic track has too much self-noise (from what i can hear, i realize i may not be hearing it right). maybe you can talk a little bit about mic placement and we can see if improvements can be made there.

the last thing that jumps out is the cymbal sound, it's a little too splashy imo.

here's the good news -- overall, i think you've got a pretty good sense of engineering and, with practice and better gear, could turn out some really nice-sounding stuff. imo, you're at the enviable stage of having outgrown your gear. (too many people have good gear but no sense of what to do with it)

 

[bowens]

i'm going to comment what i heard sound-wise, not song-wise....

the best thing you've got going on is your voice, it's got a really nice quality to it. processing-wise, i think there's too much reverb. i think you'd do better by playing with some very small and subtle delays to create some space around it, so you can back off the reverb. i also don't think the mic you're using is doing your voice any favors, it's not capturing what would probably be a very nice body and i can hear too much sibilance.

sounds to me that your levels were too low on the acoustic and you're not getting enough signal to noise. i.e. the acoustic track has too much self-noise (from what i can hear, i realize i may not be hearing it right). maybe you can talk a little bit about mic placement and we can see if improvements can be made there.

the last thing that jumps out is the cymbal sound, it's a little too splashy imo.

here's the good news -- overall, i think you've got a pretty good sense of engineering and, with practice and better gear, could turn out some really nice-sounding stuff. imo, you're at the enviable stage of having outgrown your gear. (too many people have good gear but no sense of what to do with it)

I appreciate the comments. I really don't know anything about recording. I've done a couple songs like this. All I have now is a Mac Mini and a Samson C01U USB mic. I don't know anything about placement or anything like that. Any advice you could give me would be appreciated. I agree with you about the reverb. I knew the vocals needed something to make them fuller. I also agree about the cymbals, but that is the best I could find in GarageBand.

 

[zimv20]

I don't know anything about placement or anything like that.

i think this is probably a good start.

I agree with you about the reverb. I knew the vocals needed something to make them fuller.

<trade secret>
use two delays for the lead vox, panned hard L and R. for the delay amount, they should have a 2:1 ratio (no hard rule on which is which). initially, try shooting for one at a quarter note, the other at an eighth, but this can vary based on the song style.

set the feedback so you get several repeats on each, but i like to vary the number (one may have 3 repeats, the other 5, for example. again, doesn't matter which is which).

with the lead vox and delays solo'ed, bring down the level of the delays such that you can still hear them, but not so much that they sound like obvious delays. we're talking subtle here.

now bring in the rest of the mix. what you should hear is the lead vox having a different sense of space -- its own -- but not the delays themselves. the delays are something you should sense, not hear.

after that, you can send just a bit of the (non-delayed) lead vox to the reverb buss, to help it sit in the soundstage. it should be a good deal less than you "needed" before.
</trade secret>

an example of this technique can be heard here.

 

[bowens]

Thanks, zim. I really appreciate. I am, hopefully, going to mess with this tonight. I have to put on a suit and go to some stupid chamber of commerce banquet tonight. My wife's bank is getting "Business of the Year." These things alway suck. Hopefully I will get home early enough to try this out, though.

Thanks again.

 

[zimv20]

Hopefully I will get home early enough to try this out, though.

don't be afraid to experiment, and do stuff like balance one delay side with the guitar reverb on the other (and stuff like that). it's by no means a formula, what i wrote above is just a starting point.

have fun!

 

[bowens]

don't be afraid to experiment, and do stuff like balance one delay side with the guitar reverb on the other (and stuff like that). it's by no means a formula, what i wrote above is just a starting point.

have fun!

Well, I got home late last night (stupid banquet) so I didn't get to work on it. I definitely will during the 3 day weekend though.

 

[SkyBell]

The End

I Love this song! I've already downloaded it!

 

[Quboid]

Pretty neat song. Love the message too.

 

[bowens]

I Love this song! I've already downloaded it!

Thanks, I hope you enjoy it. You're from Arkansas? I have a friend who used to play in my band that went to school in Searcy and is now living in Little Rock. I'll be heading up there in a couple months.

Pretty neat song. Love the message too.

Thanks, alot. I really enjoy playing and sharing the love of God through music.