Greatest message board thread ever?

Discussion in 'Community' started by miloblithe, Mar 30, 2005.

  1. Blue Velvet Moderator emeritus

    Jul 4, 2004
    Those conditions sound pretty stacked against the adult so I would say, for me, probably 3-4, tops.
  2. Manzana macrumors 6502a


    Jul 19, 2004
    Orange County, CA
    think of neo vs "the smiths" in (i can't recall which) matrix, they call it the burly brawl.

    honestly, i could probably go for 20 minutes before i got tired! let's say 80 kids
  3. wordmunger macrumors 603


    Sep 3, 2003
    North Carolina
    Maybe not even one, if it was this kid

    P.S. That's a pretty funny thread, in an incredibly sick way.
  4. miloblithe thread starter macrumors 68020


    Nov 14, 2003
    Washington, DC
    This actually happened to me (sort of) when I was in elementary school. I was only 11, so not an adult, but somehow I pissed off a pack of first graders and they started chasing after me. Much to my surprise, they somehow cornered me and all attacked me. It was one of those not-very-violent types of fights, but whatever the scale, I was certainly the loser.

    Ah, memories...
  5. Sun Baked macrumors G5

    Sun Baked

    May 19, 2002
    Sorry, I think I'll skip playing this game.

    Because it sounds like one of Michael Jackson's wet dreams... [​IMG]

    You freaks. :p
  6. plinden macrumors 68040


    Apr 8, 2004
    Much as I would like read through and laugh at that thread (as I would have, say three years ago), I now find the whole idea disturbing and nauseating. I guess it's something to do with having become a father twice in the past three years.
  7. MongoTheGeek macrumors 68040


    Sep 13, 2003
    Its not so much where you are as when you are.
    It really depends on how fast they come. The solution is to have 3 or 4 grab each arm and leg to immobilize the adult and the start taking him/her apart. One arm/leg free I can clobber, maybe throw small ones. Both arms then I can heave just about any of them into others and use the smaller ones to clear areas.

    Given that... Probably a good 40 or so until I get tired.
  8. mgargan1 macrumors 65816


    Feb 22, 2003
    Reston, VA
  9. zelmo macrumors 603


    Jul 3, 2004
    Mac since 7.5
    A highly disturbing proposal, since I have a 4 year old son at home.

    OTOH, If I were to set aside my distaste for the idea, I might venture to say I could probably knock out 35-40 of the little buggers before getting tired. If they swarm you, they are as apt to hit one another as land a solid damaging blow on you. Regarding the value of their training, I don't see there being a lot of retention, if my son and his friends are any indication. Ultimately, it would come down to your stamina and your willingness to render little people unconscious.
  10. stoid macrumors 601


    Feb 17, 2002
    So long, and thanks for all the fish!
    I think that the key part of the equation is footwear. If the kids are wearing shoes, it would give them a great advantage. Without shoes, I don't think that they could kick hard enough anywhere except stomach for it to really hurt.
  11. redeye be macrumors 65816

    redeye be

    Jan 27, 2005
    feet, knees, fists, elbows and as a last resort the head.
    I think i could handle a few. I have some experience in a youth movement (hehe sounds cool, doesn't it) with 6-7 year olds. If you can't hurt them (and they had no training) when they swarm you it's hard to stay up against 20 of them. If all is allowed i'd say 50 would be possible.

    Where do i sign up? ;)
  12. Mr. Durden macrumors 6502a

    Jan 13, 2005
    I cant get the link to work, but I'm speewing Pepsi out of my nose just reading these posts (a winning iTunes Pepsi at that). I've got a near 5 year old at home and we wrestle all the time, so I'm using that experience and I'm gonna say that if I backed into a corner so they couldnt come from every direction, and was able to actually knock one out and use it as a weapon (this is so sick), I could take out at least 50 - 60 maybe more, depending on how quickly I got tired.

    And I think, just for fun, I would let them all pile on early on so I could do the Matrix Burly Brawl move where you get up really fast and make the explosion of bodies flying everywhere, like Neo did.
  13. Lacero macrumors 604


    Jan 20, 2005
    This is the oddest subject. I guess depending on the size of the 5 year olds I could take on probably 10 at one time. If they were fat, and they all swarmed on me at the same time, it would be pretty difficult to say the least.

    20 would just be way too overwhelming. That's like an entire classroom of children!
  14. Jaffa Cake macrumors Core

    Jaffa Cake

    Aug 1, 2004
    The City of Culture, Englandshire
    Me? I'm going to stick my neck out and say two – possibly three on a good day.

    Just so long as I had the element of surprise...
  15. homerjward macrumors 68030


    May 11, 2004
    fig tree
    hmm...if they're anything like my 10 yr old brother, i'd say 10-15. if the stipulation about the cup weren't there id say 3-5. i know that sounds 10-15 sounds like a lot but when you think about it they cant all get to you at once unless you're hella fat so they'll have to come in waves and if you knock one wave down they'll fall into the next. once they're on the ground it's a simple matter of kicking them in the face repeatedly or throwing them against a wall.
  16. mcadam macrumors 6502a


    Apr 3, 2004
    In my experience kids fall over pretty easily. And I reckon they are not to hard to knock out. So if they have to run a bit to get to me, they'll get spread out and I'll have time and space to swing some big ones at them. I'm not in particularly good shape, all in all I think I'd get very exhausted dealing 40 hard hits. Max 45.

    If they manage to attack me in a more dense formation, then I don't know, maybe just a few before they would have swarmed me completely. They can be pretty nasty up close, especially if they're trained. I would go down heroically fighting though.


    edit: on second thought - 40-45 is completely unrealistic. I've read the rules again, on a basketball court I would have to run around (remember: you can always outrun a kid) to keep them spread out, which would add to the exhaustion. I'd say 30 tops.
  17. MacAztec macrumors 68040


    Oct 28, 2001
    San Luis Obispo, CA
    I think I could take about 25 or so. But, think of this..

    Anyone watch ultimate fighting? I mean, the REAL show, not the crap they show on standard cable. I would LOVE to match an Ultimate Fighter up against the 5 year olds. I bet he could take 100. No joke, they are trained killers.
  18. PlaceofDis macrumors Core

    Jan 6, 2004
    i have no idea how many i could take, maybe 20 or so before i got worn down, i was a wrestler in h.s. so i might have some edge on 'em here

    Off Topic:

    did you guys see the mario avatar? talk about WRONG!!!
  19. MacAztec macrumors 68040


    Oct 28, 2001
    San Luis Obispo, CA
    i was thinkin about wrestling, but that would be worse. once you are on the ground you are done.

    the best would be a fist fighter/boxer.
  20. quackattack macrumors 6502a


    Aug 13, 2004
    Boise, ID
    This is the funniest thing I have ever read. I think you guys are over estimating how long you can go without getting tired. There would be a lot of movement involved in fighting them off. Especially if you had them surrounding you. I think that getting a limb free would be challenge enough.

    That said I'm going to say 10-15, after that I think I would be way too tired to fend the little buggers off. ;)
  21. killuminati macrumors 68020


    Dec 6, 2004
    Thats what i was going to say,

    he was taken on by about 15. But they all had marshal arts training
  22. clayj macrumors 604


    Jan 14, 2005
    visiting from downstream
    Heck, that was the best part of the thread! I saved a copy of that to my HD for future use. :)
  23. PlaceofDis macrumors Core

    Jan 6, 2004

    it got a chuckle out of me but the 10pts was just too much for me!!!

    hey at least we all know that mario got the goods in the end and all wasnt for just a cake or a kiss LoL
  24. PlaceofDis macrumors Core

    Jan 6, 2004
    yeah, the only good thing about wrestling experience are the upper body throws that would help you with your momentum and balance

    i also think because i was a wrestler i have pushed my level of stamia further than most people so that would be very helpful as well, not to mention im used to taking a beating :D

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