Letter to Tech Support

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by orangemacapple, Feb 16, 2007.

  1. orangemacapple macrumors 6502

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2006
    Location:
    Raleigh
    #1
    From: TechSupport@rumors.com
    Subject: Letter to Tech Support
    Date: February 14, 2007 9:01:44 PM EST

    Dear Tech Support:

    Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 . I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity in applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6

    I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!

    Thanks,
    A Troubled User.



    ______________________________________

    REPLY:
    Dear Troubled User:

    This is a very common problem among new users of this program.

    Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

    You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this action. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear 3.7" to alleviate software conflicts.

    The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

    Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

    However, be very careful how you use these programs . Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

    WARNING!!! DO NOT , under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

    Best of luck,
    Tech Support
     
  2. ezzie macrumors 68020

    ezzie

    Joined:
    Sep 7, 2006
    Location:
    Baltimore, MD
    #2
    heh....i fully expected to see a mean and nasty letter to applecare. :p

    as a semi-newlywed and a freaking computer nerd, i appreciated this very much. :D thanks for posting!
     

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