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Lord Jesus Christ Hit By Car

Discussion in 'Current Events' started by mactastic, May 7, 2010.

  1. macrumors 68040


    For reals:
  2. macrumors G4


    He must have forgotten to turn the other cheek. He'd have seen the car otherwise.
  3. macrumors 68030


    The second coming is a lot less elaborate than I had been led to believe.
  4. macrumors 68040


    God shoots, Jesus saves.
  5. macrumors 68040

    Been making the rounds on the local news around here..He probably was floating a foot off the ground before he stepped off the curb..
  6. macrumors 6502


    Thats exactly why "He" was supposed to walk like everyone else and not float in the air.
  7. macrumors G4

    Lord Blackadder

    Odd that he needed hospital treatment, though there is no biblical evidence that healing powers can be directed upon onesself.

    It appears that this man has literally taken the Lord's name in vain, in that his name is Lord Jesus Christ - but he was still injured.
  8. macrumors 68030

  9. macrumors member


    That's one hell of a name. :p
  10. macrumors 6502a

    Before the night is out, one of you will crack me with a Y-reg Astra...
  11. macrumors 68040


    I once made a business card for a man who's legal name was Shalom Dreampeace Compost. Some kind of county employee position. :p
  12. macrumors G4

    Lord Blackadder

    Sounds like a damned dirty hippie to me. Maybe he worked in recycling?
  13. macrumors G5

    Was he taken to the hospital on this?


    I'm going to hell....
  14. macrumors G3


    ^ Took me a second to get that. :D

    Gretzky scores on the rebound.

    Jesus saves, Moses invests.
  15. macrumors 6502


  16. Guest


    ^^^^^ He's just following the money.......

    Not if you don't believe in hell.......:D

    I saw Jesus at Cedars Sinai Hospital a few weeks ago..... he was holding a cell phone and reading the bulletin board.
  17. macrumors 68000


    Wait, that wasn't the real Jesus... Right? :confused:
    He, like, just has the same name, right??? :eek:
    I mean, why would Jesus get run over? He like, would've known it was coming.
    *hits bong*
  18. macrumors 601

    Ah, metaphysical subjective idealism! So, that tree doesn't make a sound, eh? ;)
  19. macrumors 6502


    The real question is who is Jesus using for his personal injury attorney?:p
  20. macrumors 603


    Has anyone seen his dad?
  21. macrumors 601


    Wouldn't have happened if god had been the driver's co-pilot ;)
  22. macrumors member


    Oh wow. xD
  23. macrumors 68040


    It's the end result of the mother being asked what the child's name is while she's still in labor.
  24. macrumors 68040


    I want to know what words were used in the seconds before the accident.

    Driver: Jesus Christ! Get out of the way!!!

    Pedestrian/Victim: Oh my God!

    Screeching tires......... CRASH!!!
  25. macrumors 68020

    I hope he forgave him for she does not know what she had done.

    But seriously who names there child lord Jesus Christ (exept for the real Jesus of corse) how do u go through life like that.

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