over reacting girlfriend joke

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by cantthinkofone, Jan 24, 2007.

  1. cantthinkofone macrumors 65816


    Jul 25, 2004
    Missouri, USA
    does anybody have that joke about that over reacting girlfriend? the one where the guy and girl are driving back from a date and the guy is thinking about how the mechanic that worked on his truck or car might have over charged him. and she thinks hes mad at her over somthing. anybody? :p
  2. Zwhaler macrumors 603


    Jun 10, 2006
  3. twoodcc macrumors P6


    Feb 3, 2005
    Right side of wrong
    me too :)
  4. shecky Guest


    May 24, 2003
    Obviously you're not a golfer.
    staple the baby to the chicken?

    wait............ wrong joke. nevermind.
  5. twoodcc macrumors P6


    Feb 3, 2005
    Right side of wrong
    wait....did someone say something about a baby and a blender?.....whoops
  6. Abstract macrumors Penryn


    Dec 27, 2002
    Location Location Location
    What happens when you put a baby in a microwave?

    Wha? Mechanic babies what?
  7. UKnjb macrumors 6502a


    May 23, 2005
    London, UK
    Hi. I am sure you're thinking of the "Elaine & Roger" one. I have attached it as a .pdf.

    Hope I've go the right one for you - if not, enjoy this one! :)

    Attached Files:

  8. phungy macrumors 68020


    Dec 5, 2006
    Bwahaha, that was hilarious!
  9. cantthinkofone thread starter macrumors 65816


    Jul 25, 2004
    Missouri, USA
    YES!! thats the one. Thanks alot!!
  10. StokeLee macrumors 6502


    May 30, 2005
    Stoke-on-Trent. Midlands, UK
    oooerrr, Ive heard one really similar to that. Ive whited out his side of the story.. :D

    Her Side of the Story:

    He was in an odd mood Sunday night. We planned to meet in a bar for a drink. I spent the afternoon shopping with the girls, so I thought it might have been my fault because I was a bit later than I promised, but he didn't say anything much about it. I don't remember doing anything to make him upset, but could tell there was something wrong. The conversation was quite slow going, so I thought we should go off to some place intimate to talk more privately. We went to this restaurant and he was still acting a bit funny. I was getting really worried. What did I do? What was bothering him? Was he mad at me? I tried to cheer him up.

    Was it me or something else? I asked him if he was upset with me, and he said no. But I wasn't really sure. In the car on the way home I said that I loved him deeply, and he just put his arm around me. I didn't know what that meant because he didn't say it back or anything.

    We finally got back home and I was wondering if he was going to leave me! So I tried to get him to talk, but he just switched on the TV. Reluctantly, I said I was going to bed. Then after about 10 minutes he joined me, and, to my surprise, we made love. But he still seemed really distracted, so afterward I just wanted to comfort him, but instead I just cried myself to sleep. I just don't know what to do anymore. I mean, I really think he's seeing someone else.

    His Side of the Story

    Played badly today-shot 87-can't putt. Felt kinda tired. Got laid though
  11. swiftaw macrumors 603


    Jan 31, 2005
    Omaha, NE, USA
    I thought this was blank until I released there was hidden text underneath
  12. twoodcc macrumors P6


    Feb 3, 2005
    Right side of wrong
    thanks. i read it. not too bad
  13. comictimes macrumors 6502a


    Jun 20, 2004
    Berkeley, California
    damn... I was so proud of myself for having found the joke online from just remembering the "did elaine ever own a horse?" line, but apparently UKnjb got to it way before me. Ah well, still a hilarious joke in my opinion...
  14. shoestring macrumors newbie

    Jan 24, 2007
    Screaming it from the top of a mountain
    Awesome.. sending this off to my girlfriend right now.
  15. MongoTheGeek macrumors 68040


    Sep 13, 2003
    Its not so much where you are as when you are.
    So are you trying to ruin the relationship?
  16. Tymmz macrumors 65816


    Jan 6, 2005
  17. Baron58 macrumors 6502

    Feb 19, 2004
    Let's say a guy named Roger is attracted to a woman named Elaine. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else. And then, one evening when they're driving home, a thought occurs to Elaine, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud: "Do you realize that, as of tonight, we've been seeing each other for exactly six months?" And then there is silence in the car.

    To Elaine, it seems like a very loud silence. She thinks to herself: Geez, I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he's been feeling confined by our relationship; maybe he thinks I'm trying to push him into some kind of obligation that he doesn't want, or isn't sure of.

    And Roger is thinking: Gosh. Six months.

    And Elaine is thinking: But, hey, I'm not so sure I want this kind of relationship, either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I'd have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going the way we are, moving steadily toward . . . I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person?

    And Roger is thinking: . . . so that means it was . . . let's see ...February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer's, which means... Lemme check the odometer... Whoa! I am way overdue for an oil change here.

    And Elaine is thinking: He's upset. I can see it on his face. Maybe I'm reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment; maybe he has sensed -- even before I sensed it -- that I was feeling some reservations. Yes, I bet that's it. That's why he's so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. He's afraid of being rejected.

    And Roger is thinking: And I'm gonna have them look at the transmission again. I don't care what those morons say, it's still not shifting right. And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What cold weather? It's 87 degrees out, and this thing is shifting like a damn garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves $600!

    And Elaine is thinking: He's angry. And I don't blame him. I'd be angry, too. God, I feel so guilty, putting him through this, but I can't help the way I feel. I'm just not sure.

    And Roger is thinking: They'll probably say it's only a 90-day warranty. That's exactly what they're gonna say, the low-lifes.

    And Elaine is thinking: Maybe I'm just too idealistic, waiting for a knight to come riding up on his white horse, when I'm sitting right next to a perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a person I truly do care about, a person who seems to truly care about me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centered, schoolgirl romantic fantasy.

    And Roger is thinking: Warranty? They want a warranty? I'll give them a damn warranty. I'll take their warranty and stick it right up their ....

    "Roger," Elaine says aloud. "What?" says Roger, startled. "Please don't torture yourself like this," she says, her eyes beginning to brim with tears. "Maybe I should never have...Oh God, I feel so....." (She breaks down, sobbing.)

    "What?" says Roger.

    "I'm such a fool," Elaine sobs. "I mean, I know there's no knight. I really know that. It's silly. There's no knight, and there's no horse."

    "There's no horse?" says Roger.

    "You think I'm a fool, don't you?" Elaine says.

    "No!" says Roger, glad to finally know the correct answer.

    "It's just that . . . It's that I . . . I need some time," Elaine says.

    (There is a 15-second pause while Roger, thinking as fast as he can, tries to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he thinks might work.)

    "Yes," he says.

    (Elaine, deeply moved, touches his hand.)

    "Oh, Roger, do you really feel that way?" she says.

    "What way?" says Roger.

    "That way about time," says Elaine.

    "Oh," says Roger. "Yes."

    (Elaine turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him to become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she speaks.)

    "Thank you, Roger," she says.

    "Thank you," says Roger.

    Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted, tortured soul, and weeps until dawn, whereas when Roger gets back to his place, he opens a bag of Doritos, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply involved in a rerun of a tennis match between two Czechoslovakians he's never heard of.

    A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever understand what, and so he figures it's better if he doesn't think about it. (This is also Roger's policy regarding world hunger.)

    The next day Elaine will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of them, and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyze everything she said and everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every word, expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering every possible ramification. They will continue to discuss this subject, off and on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any definite conclusions, but never getting bored with it, either.

    Meanwhile, Roger, while playing racquetball one day with a mutual friend of his and Elaine's, will pause just before serving, frown, and say: "Norm, did Elaine ever own a horse?"

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