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Discussion in 'MacBytes.com News Discussion' started by MacBytes, Nov 16, 2005.
Link: PodDater: video dating via iPod
Posted on MacBytes.com
Approved by Mudbug
Maybe I'm old, maybe I have social skills, but I just don't get it.
I'm not old, and I don't get it either. Of course, I have social skills as well, but still...
oh my goodness...
/me lowers head and walks away slowly...
Actually I think this is a great idea!
I really, really don't get it. Never understood the whole internet personal thing, especially when there are 16 and 17 year olds with their entire life history for anyone to see.
An oportunity for a diferent form of 'video' dating There is always the traditional form of meeting people face to face
This way is safer and you can get yourself out to more people faster. Plus the person on the receiving end of one of these personal video ads has the option to turn it off if one finds it uninteresting. Hard to do in a face to face meeting.
/Is that my cellphone ringing?
//* I don't think so.
///Let me take the call. I'll be right back.
//// [doesn't come back]
Not to mention, some peoples' lives and schedules makes meeting people face to face easier than for others. Online matching/searching is far from a perfect plan, but cruising bars for random strangers is hardly an ideal scenario either.
Maybe I've missed something... but how does watching a video of someone on your iPod constitute 'dating' anyway?
I think it's to meet them, not to start dating them. Although, certain types of videos could lend themselves to dating I suppose
I'm not sure about the thing entirely, but I sure like 'Adrian' from 'Chicago' who is in 'commercial real-estate'
Jesus. H. Christ.
True although I met my better half through a social events company for singles after I had been single for 32 years of my life. We have now been together for 3.5 years and will be married on Feb 4th 2006
Awesome, there's hope for me yet!
I always am curious to know if those dating resources work or if they are just the equivalent of a semi-returning scam to take money for depressed people. I know a few of them claim to run all these compatibility tests and such, but I'm still skeptical.
I don't know, but doesn't making out with your iPod ruin the controls?
Funny you should ask I find the subject interesting--for personal reasons AND as a sociological question. Lots of people I know have been trying these services or looking into them. On the surface, targeted mass-searching sounds great--a real advantage over any in-person venue. And there is some value to that, but reality of course falls short. My semi-scientific analysis:
Approach with extreme skepticism, and remember the business model: They make money from dangling the hope of meeting someone, but they STOP making money if you actually do. Be aware of high male-to-female ratios that don't benefit either party: women get bombarded with contacts that aren't serious, and men get lost in the stampede of other men. Fake profiles (phishing scams etc.) are common, and not always obvious. And membership tends to be low outside of big cities: lots of results may appear, but in fact they are almost all people who have left the site and will not return.
That's not to say it's useless, just approach it realistically: be on your guard and treat it as "what the heck, why not give it a try?" Avoid anything that will auto-renew charges on your credit card. At the same time, don't rely on the free trial services, because things are often set up so that free contacts are ignored while paid ones have a (small) shot at being effective. Browse for free and don't pay at all until you find a few people who are worth paying to contact--and who have been active on the site within a week (otherwise they are likely never to get your message anyway). And do post a picture: people are shallow, and tend to ignore all but the supermodels. However, better to have them ignore you from the start than to cut you off later when they see your picture. At the same time, don't trust others' pictures: they are likely several years old. And ignore compatibility tests--they're often hilarious, but seldom accurate.
Last but not least: people are a) anonymous and b) frustrated with the system. That brings out the worst in people. They will be rude, and they will be dishonest (about age, income, marital status, etc.). Even if they start out friendly, the moment they are no longer interested they will lose all courtesy. Don't take it personally. Make the experiment with an open mind, and--like any other way of meeting people--expect nothing, but there's always a chance. Just be safe--if you meet someone, do it in public and tell people where you are.
Don't reject the idea, but do approach it in the right way. Take time to figure out the systems, pick the best one(s), and learn to make the most of them. Expect only a trickle of meaningful responses--connecting with someone still takes a lot of time and luck, no matter what the method.
Well that certainly takes all the fun out of those 'discreet contacts' I was looking to make
All good advice, if you were interested in joining a site like that. I was interested to know if it worked out for others (one already in this thread) but not so much for myself. I still struggle with paying a middle-man to get me dates/contacts, but that's just me. I'd rather just wait 'til I'm older and attract a hot young model with all of my bitter-old finances
Now, see, that's a good strategy too!
Absolutely! I have discovered that it is more likely to happen when your not actually trying to meet someone. Between the ages of 25-32 I was trying too hard to meet 'miss right' then I gave up and BAM! I found her!
The company I went for was an events based company as opposed to a dating agency. The idea being that you go out on a trip to the beach, or evening boat cruise or wine trail or pub night etc with a group of like minded similar aged single guys and girls and just aim to have a good time without necessarily aiming to 'meet' and 'date' a perspective partner. If you meet that person on one of the events you can make arrangements to catch up with each other in your own time and take it from there otherwise you just keep going along to the various functions and events and enjoy yourself until you meet someone that you 'click' with.
Of course, it never happens when you want it to. When I don't want a girl she will want me...but when I want a girl really bad, like now for holidays , she will never want me.
What a damned vicious cycle. I hate this....more...porter
Ah yes been there, done that, It's known as the 'desperate' phase and girls can see it in a guy. When your 'not interested' in them you give of a 'aura' of confidence or dis-interest which girls seem to be 'intriged' by and therefore more interested in you... go figure ( I guess it breaks down to them wondering why your not appearing to be attracted to their feminine qualities...)
Finally when your 'not looking' you give of the contented, confident and 'semi-disinterested' look which is what attracts girls. I think they like a guy who has or appears to have a certain level of self confidence and possibly an ability to provide and stable relationship and/or income/house to support a potential family. Whether any of this actually works out to be true or not depends entirely on the situation. In my case most parts of that equation have worked out, took a loooooong time to get there and realise it though, VERY frustrating inbetween (also known as growing up, maturing, and becoming more settled)
I realize those points, they don't make the holidays any easier though
I know that confidence, not arrogance however, is very attractive, as is stability and in a lot of cases wealth/success. Being attracted to those traits is not inherently bad, however if that is all you looked at I would have to believe that you would be cutting out many decent and potential people.
I want a girlfriend over the holidays, it feels nice and content, but I'm not looking for one and even if one strolled up I would probably postpone starting anything until post-New Year simply due to hectic-isity and lack of time in the coming months.
I suspect that all our trying and analyzing is like a butterfly in a hurricane, with the real factors being 75% random and 25% out of all possible control
The entire contents of this forum can be summed up with those words, especially all of the 'Next Tuesday' and 'No Intel Sticker' threads
Without our pointless analyzation what does that leave us with?