Ransom Note

Discussion in '4,000,000 Post Contest' started by Doctor Q, Aug 6, 2007.

  1. Administrator

    Doctor Q

    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2002
    Location:
    Kepler-452b
    #1
    August 6, 2007

    Apple Inc.
    1 Infinite Loop
    Cupertino, CA 95014

    Dear Apple,

    I demand that you announce 20" and 24" brushed-metal Penryn-based iMacs with a newly designed keyboard tomorrow. I also demand that you release new 20", 24", and 32" Apple displays with builtin iSights, plus a Mac Pro speed bump and new .Mac features.

    If you don't do as I instruct, I will shave this mustache off, ruining my rugged yet sophisticated look, and you'll be sorry. Don't make me do it!

    Sincerely,

    Doctor Q

    Qustache.jpg

    ========

    August 8, 2007

    Apple Inc.
    1 Infinite Loop
    Cupertino, CA 95014

    Dear Apple,

    Your half-hearted attempt to meet my demands, by releasing new iMacs, a new keyboard, new .Mac features, and updates to iLife and iWork yesterday, wasn't good enough. You didn't take me seriously and now you'll have to face the consequences. I've done just as I threatened, mutilating myself in protest. I don't know how you'll live with yourself now.

    As I face the shame of my new appearance, at least I'll know that without my action you would not have released any new products, so customers with new iMacs and software will have benefited.

    Sincerely,

    Doctor Q

    Qnostache.jpg

    ========

    Contest notes:
    • As an administrator, I am not eligible for the contest.
    • I had no inside information about Apple's plans.
    • Photos are real, taken August 6 and August 8.
    Extra credit - not for contest.
     
  2. macrumors 68040

    Killyp

    Joined:
    Jun 14, 2006
    #2
    :D I'm sure you've got Apple quaking in their boots Q :D
     
  3. Moderator emeritus

    mkrishnan

    Joined:
    Jan 9, 2004
    Location:
    Grand Rapids, MI, USA
  4. macrumors P6

    Peace

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2005
    Location:
    Space--The ONLY Frontier
    #4

    Man! I'M quaking in my boots!! :eek:
     
  5. Administrator emeritus

    xUKHCx

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2006
    Location:
    The Kop
    #5
    You look legendary. I doubt apple would want to take the blame for ruining such a look. Your wishes will come true.
     
  6. macrumors P6

    IJ Reilly

    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2002
    Location:
    Palookaville
    #6
    More likely, he'd be Doctor Ow.
     
  7. thread starter Administrator

    Doctor Q

    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2002
    Location:
    Kepler-452b
    #7
  8. macrumors 65816

    steamboat26

    Joined:
    May 25, 2006
    Location:
    Arlington VA
  9. macrumors 68030

    iPhil

    #9
    Q: I think your close on  release items.. Well only 16 hours-30 mins to go 'til the event .. ;)
     
  10. macrumors 603

    SkyBell

    Joined:
    Sep 7, 2006
    Location:
    Texas, unfortunately.
    #10
    Could you find it in your heart to put "and update the mini and don';t discontinue it"?:D
     
  11. thread starter Administrator

    Doctor Q

    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2002
    Location:
    Kepler-452b
    #11
    I've updated my first post. It now includes my second letter to Apple.

    Just for Cassie, I arranged for the Mac mini to be continued.

    I hope my mostly-nonviolent protest did some good. I now live in great fear of upper lip sunburn! :eek:
     
  12. macrumors P6

    IJ Reilly

    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2002
    Location:
    Palookaville
    #12
    You were smiling more with the mustache than without. I do hope you will soon get over your loss. :)
     
  13. macrumors G4

    skunk

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2002
    Location:
    Republic of Ukistan
    #13
    I see you had to change your shirt to hide the bloodstains. Never mind, the first time is always a bit bloody.
     
  14. Moderator emeritus

    mkrishnan

    Joined:
    Jan 9, 2004
    Location:
    Grand Rapids, MI, USA
    #14
    I think you went from looking rugged and sophisticated to youthful and sophisticated. :)
     
  15. macrumors 6502a

    djstarrock

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2006
    Location:
    UK, Scotland, Glasgow
    #15
    Not to be rude but in the first pic you kinda look like Mario.
     
  16. thread starter Administrator

    Doctor Q

    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2002
    Location:
    Kepler-452b
    #16
    I smile all the time, even after being slashed by razors, but I knew I had to avoid my usual Alfred E. Neuman grin in order to give Apple an appropriately serious message. ;)

    Luckily, Apple won't bother reading the rest of this thread, since they have other work to do. :cool:
    Plumbers make lots of money (at least the one we call does). Perhaps I should have kept the Mario look for career reasons.
     
  17. macrumors P6

    IJ Reilly

    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2002
    Location:
    Palookaville
    #17
    Maybe I should get my avatar to shave off his mustache.

    On second thought, he's scary enough already. :eek:
     
  18. thread starter Administrator

    Doctor Q

    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2002
    Location:
    Kepler-452b
    #18
    Some people were just meant to have mustaches. For example, without a mustache, Snidely Whiplash wouldn't be able to do his job:

    [​IMG]
    Image from dudley-do-right.com.
     
  19. macrumors 65816

    Genghis Khan

    Joined:
    Jun 3, 2007
    Location:
    Melbourne, Australia
    #19
    one of my friends surnames is qu (pronounced 'q')...is that yours as well?

    but nice try:)
     

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