Tips on dating persons from foreign countries?

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by princealfie, Jul 11, 2006.

  1. princealfie macrumors 68030

    princealfie

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    Mar 7, 2006
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    Salt Lake City UT
    #1
    Being a matchmaker, I was wondering if anyone could provide advice on dating people from a foreign country relative to yours (non-UScentric question here)... What type of cultural differences/similarities did one/you have to overcome? And immigration laws?
     
  2. Black&Tan macrumors 6502a

    Black&Tan

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    Mar 4, 2004
    #2
    I think this is a waaay too open question. What I think you really need to consider is the individual, local culture and how that affects behavior and values. Every country is different and I would hate to see this turn into stereotypes of the French, the Italians, etc.
     
  3. cleanup macrumors 68030

    cleanup

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2005
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    Toronto
    #3
    KOREAN GIRLS DO NOT SHARE THEIR FEELINGS.

    Holy God. What a mess.
     
  4. Doctor Q Administrator

    Doctor Q

    Staff Member

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    Location:
    Los Angeles
    #4
    I assume there are websites that cover information like this. Perhaps some of our members know where to find them.
     
  5. princealfie thread starter macrumors 68030

    princealfie

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    #5
    This is more of a personal experience type of question, not a generalization thing here :) That was the intent.
     
  6. 2nyRiggz macrumors 603

    2nyRiggz

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    Aug 20, 2005
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    Thank you Jah...I'm so Blessed
    #6
    Love is so strange....ahhh...sorry dude I can't help you...


    Bless
     
  7. Chacala_Nayarit macrumors 6502

    Chacala_Nayarit

    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2005
    Location:
    Lakewood, Washington
    #7
    Some of the top spots on the planet for poon:

    Mar de Plata, Argentina

    Brasil

    Biarritz, France

    Ibiza, Spain

    South Beach, Miami, Florida, USA

    ;)
     
  8. d wade macrumors 65816

    d wade

    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2006
    Location:
    Boca Raton, FL
    #8
    you know how we do it in south fla :)

    my ex gf: from south africa

    my current gf: from turkey

    i like exotic chicks.

    advice: as long as you can put aside cultural differences and be opened minded (and try to understand his/her parents' heavy accents) then you should be ok
     
  9. floriflee macrumors 68030

    floriflee

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2004
    #9
    I'm married to an Indian born and raised in America. Yet, there are still a few cultural differences between our families. The ones I've faced as a result of being in a relationship with the hubby directly have been minimal--how we expect to be handled after death, for one. The ones I've faced as a result of being in a relationship with his family (especially extended) have been a bit bigger. Don't get me wrong--I love my in-laws, but the father-in-law and I don't see eye to eye on a lot of things. Then again, the rest of the family doesnt see eye to eye with the FIL on a lot of things either. I'll just keep it at he's very set in his ways and often single-minded. A lot of his mannerisms and ways are very traditionalist Indian male (as has been pointed out by several Indian friends).

    On the other hand, I have a good friend from Russia who was here on an H-1 visa. She got married this year to a U.S. citizen. I think as a result she will be able to get her permanent residency more quickly than if she were unmarried or married to another non-resident. She's adapted pretty well to the culture here, but that's mostly been because she's been in the States for several years (i.e., since college) and worked to assimilate herself. I don't think she had too many cultural things to overcome by the time she met her hubby and got married. If anything, her kids will get to be multi-lingual. :)

    All in all, I think that generally the longer a person is in the country they are living in the easier it will be to match up with a resident of that country--so long as the person has not isolated him/herself. They will generally have a better idea of how things work and how people in the country think/talk/interact. A lot also depends on how different the cultural differences are and how traditional the person is. The more alike the cultures the faster the persons will adapt to each other. As far as family is concerned, I think it also helps when they are exposed to the cultures. I found that while my in-laws living in the States were generally accepting and understanding of me the extended family living overseas certainly had a lot more misconceptions about how things work here, about people in general, and about me. Likewise, my family had a lot of questions and ideas about the Indian culture when they found out that I was involved with an Indian.

    My advice to anyone getting involved in a multi-cultural relationship is to be patient--very patient, and to do what you can to understand as much about the other culture and how things work both in the culture and in the family with whom you will be involved. Those who get involved in any relationship with someone from a different background (be it culture, religion or whatever) will need to learn perserverance.

    I don't know if that is the information you are looking for, but that's my $.02.
     
  10. quigleybc macrumors 68030

    quigleybc

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    Jun 17, 2005
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    Beautiful Vancouver British Columbia, Canada
    #10



    .....My Korean girl shares her feelings a little too much for my liking....
     
  11. Josh macrumors 68000

    Josh

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    Location:
    State College, PA
    #11
    My advice: Make sure you both are able to speak at least one of the same languages :)
     
  12. Gil Bates macrumors newbie

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    Frozen Wasteland
    #12
    How many Korean girls do you know, anyway :confused:
     
  13. rtjstevens macrumors regular

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    Apr 20, 2004
    Location:
    Sheffield + Bath UK
    #13
    Dating an American

    Why not look at it from the other way. What advice would you give to a 'foreign' male? (I'm British - so don't consider myself foreign anwhere - a hangover from the old days of Empire:) ), trying to date an American woman?

    Bw

    RTJ
     
  14. cleanup macrumors 68030

    cleanup

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    Location:
    Toronto
    #14
    A lot, but I've only dated two.

    But these aren't girls from the U.S. or who have lived in western countries. They're from Korea, and we live in Shanghai. It's a little different.
     
  15. kevin.rivers macrumors 6502a

    kevin.rivers

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2005
    #15
    Stay away from Japanese girls who are crazy about foreigners. They will want to marry you in about 2 days.

    These are the ones that will approach you. Which is a big red flag, because Japanese people, especially women do not do this. It takes time to get to know people in Japan. If someone wants to date you after about an hour there is something wrong. Run.

    If you are looking to get laid, these women are prime candidates however.

    So there is my advice.

    I do not endorse casual sex, or taking advantage of women who will let you take advantage of them.

    As far as cultural differences. If the two people are open minded people, there should be no problem.
     
  16. yojitani macrumors 68000

    yojitani

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    Apr 28, 2005
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    An octopus's garden
    #16
    Prefer to stay out of the share my experiences stuff... however, immigration to the US...

    Tips:
    Assuming you are married or intend to marry, your partner should try to get his/her greencard/ papers in their home country. In the US, it takes YEARS!

    US immigration can be quite nosey about some relationships (not mine thankfully), so you might want to make sure you document the early stages of your relationship (pictures are very helpful).

    Be prepared to fork out a small fortune (or about one Macbook worth) on absurd 'health check' requirements.

    If you are a gay couple, i have no idea, but immigration must be an unfriendly place... Move to England?

    Make sure upon immigrating that your partner has access to foodstuff from his/her country/region. US food, frankly, is horrible unless you've lived with it a long time - especially the so called 'ethnic' kind. Your partner may actually end up feeling very sick and unhappy as a result of not being able to get the food s/he is used to.

    Also, make sure that your loved one will be able to find a community of people who speak the same language.

    Learn your partner's language. Instead of wasting your time trying to understand 'their culture,' understand your partner, your partner's family, the family customs/habits etc. That is, always deal in particulars. Neither your partner nor his/her family are automatons obeying this thing called culture.

    Incidentally, if you are abroad, never listen to what ex-pats have to say about local men/women. They seem to forget that the rest of the world is not all that different.
     
  17. princealfie thread starter macrumors 68030

    princealfie

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    Salt Lake City UT
    #17
    sweet, ironic that I can get better advice here than a lot of other places :)
     
  18. Abstract macrumors Penryn

    Abstract

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    Dec 27, 2002
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    Location Location Location
    #18
    Yeah, but one I've met was quite forward. She wanted to date me and she was 16. I was 25. Guess what happened?

    (nothing)


    Japanese girls are crazy. Easy to take advantage of, but that's only a good thing if you're a complete ***hole. :rolleyes:
     
  19. scem0 macrumors 604

    scem0

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    Jul 16, 2002
    Location:
    back in NYC!
    #19
    Erm. Long distance relationships are hard :(. That's not to say that they can't be good - on the contrary, they can be great. But distance is always hard to deal with. That's all I have to say.

    e
     
  20. Black&Tan macrumors 6502a

    Black&Tan

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    Mar 4, 2004
    #20
    There is a difference between love & lust. Some cultures see nothing wrong with having sex with someone and still having a loving relationship with somebody else. The difference between physical and emotional needs...
     
  21. cait-sith macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2004
    Location:
    canada
    #21
    My experience dating a girl that did not speak english as her first language was a poor one -- it was really really difficult to overcome the communications gap.

    So my advice is: stay away from political and religion discussions, make sure your partner is cool with your lifestyle and religion, and visa-versa, and try really hard to communicate. Try learning their language, as was suggested earlier.
     
  22. yojitani macrumors 68000

    yojitani

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    Apr 28, 2005
    Location:
    An octopus's garden
    #22
    Not sure why it is that Asian women, usually Japanese but Korean too in this thread, seem to get labeled in such a way. There are slappers everywhere of both genders.

    I should take offense, but am sadly used to it. :(
     
  23. yojitani macrumors 68000

    yojitani

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    Apr 28, 2005
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    #23
    Scem0, do you know if the US gives any rights to same-sex partners of US citizens to immigrate? Considering how uptight people/politician are about marriage and even civil unions (not to mention simple visitation rights etc.) I'd imagine that there are none at all. I suggested England earlier because there are now legal, same sex civil unions there.. I suppose, that affects immigration laws as well.

    yt
     

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