Your Own Personal Internet

Discussion in 'Politics, Religion, Social Issues' started by mactastic, Jul 3, 2006.

  1. mactastic macrumors 68040

    mactastic

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    #1
    Simply amazing...
    WTF is this guy on? It's a series of tubes??? :eek: :confused: :rolleyes:
     
  2. celebrian23 macrumors 65816

    celebrian23

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    #2
    My brain hurts. I cannot even process this article. :confused:
     
  3. Jaffa Cake macrumors Core

    Jaffa Cake

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    #3
    That's the one that caught my eye too. I'm going to have to use it next time I'm explaining internets to someone. :)
     
  4. jsw Moderator emeritus

    jsw

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    Andover, MA
    #4
    Would someone please explain to me how this works when I use a computer without any tubes connected to it? Does the computer somehow throw little internet balls through the air into the tubes in that box with the antennas? Are they so tiny that the antennas are actually filled with little holes I can't see that the balls go into? Will my children get hurt if they get between my computer and the antenna thing?

    I'm now afraid and will plug the tube back into my computer.

    Also, when I empty the Trash, does that flush the garbage down the tubes? If so, and if the tubes get filled up with commercial stuff, can it back up into my computer so stuff comes out of my Trash?

    Thanks for your answers.
     
  5. mactastic thread starter macrumors 68040

    mactastic

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    #5
    I get the feeling Stevens sees the internet as something similar to the Central Filing room from Futurama.

    The scary bit is this guy is in charge of the Senate Commerce Committee that oversees things like the 'net neutrality legislation currently being debated in Congress. His committee will have a large say in if/how things get priority when they travel through those tubes...
     
  6. XNine macrumors 68040

    XNine

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    Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?
    #6
    his colleagues sent him an
    ? **** an A. I want one too!
     
  7. dornoforpyros macrumors 68040

    dornoforpyros

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    Calgary, AB
    #7
    What?!?!? an internet was sent by your staff? So the people who make the laws, for the most powerful nation on earth, can't even get a basic grasp on how the net works that they have had it dumbed down to the point that they believe they are "sending an internet"

    Simpsons quote time:

    Frank Grimes: I've never seen him do any work. What's his job?
    Lenny: Safety inspector.
    Frank Grimes: That irreponsible oaf?! A man who by all means should have been killed dozens of times by now?!
    Lenny: Umm. 316 times by my count.
    Frank Grimes: That's the man in charge of our safety? It boggles the mind!
    Carl: Yeah, it's best not to think about it.
     
  8. aquajet macrumors 68020

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    #8
    It's best not to tinker with these things. Leave them for the professionals...
     

    Attached Files:

  9. CorvusCamenarum macrumors 65816

    CorvusCamenarum

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    #9
    There should be an IQ test for government employees, with rising higher standards for senators and the like. We can call it the No Congressman Left Behind Act.

    It doesn't go through the internet, just a place on it. Umm ok.

    Could someone refresh my memory as to what ".com" stands for?

    This just in, the internet is made out of manacotti.

    My brain hurts now. I'm going to ruin my diet and have some ice cream, and remind myself never to go to Alaska, if this is the best they have to offer to represent them.
     
  10. yg17 macrumors G5

    yg17

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    #10
    I'm confused. One minute, it looks like he's talking about Netflix, and then just all of teh internets the next :confused:
     
  11. rdowns Suspended

    rdowns

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    Jul 11, 2003
    #11
    I'd expect nothing less from Senator Bridge to Nowhere. How the hell do these cretins keep getting re-elected?
     
  12. zimv20 macrumors 601

    zimv20

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    #12
    fred upton's in charge of the subcommittee that actually oversees it. and he's no smarter than stevens. the telecom lobbyists are running circles around these guys in terms of "what's best", and it's going to end up screwing all of us once the telecoms get their way.

    mac -- when i read the thread title, i thought it was referring to the idea that, once the internet is ruined, there are enough computers and wireless nodes to set up a pretty hefty alternet (i just made that up) that would be a true grassroots network. it'd be interesting to see how far such a thing could extend itself until it's killed by legislation.
     
  13. yg17 macrumors G5

    yg17

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    #13
    So my question is, when we get all of our personal internets, will information on my internet be able to communicate with information on your internet or will I have to fly to your place and connect our internets with a tube? I hope airport security lets teh internets on the plane.
     
  14. Ugg macrumors 68000

    Ugg

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    #14
    Stevens is viewed by many Alaskans as the bringer of federal dollars and their eternal hope that ANWR will be opened before the north slope runs dry.
     
  15. eva01 macrumors 601

    eva01

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    Gah! Plymouth
  16. zimv20 macrumors 601

    zimv20

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    #16
    the payroll of the telecoms.
     
  17. Peace macrumors P6

    Peace

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    #17
    I don't know what this guys on..
    Remember.....Al Gore invented the internet.:D
     
  18. FFTT macrumors 68030

    FFTT

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    #18
    The guy doesn't seem to know the difference between " The Internet"
    and a private "Intranet".

    He probably still thinks a server is the person who waits on him at a restaurant.
     
  19. Thomas Veil macrumors 68020

    Thomas Veil

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    #19
    I saw this idiot throw a tantrum on the floor of the Senate because people had dared to criticize his Bridge to Nowhere. That confirmed for me what a jerk this guy is. Now I know he's totally clueless as well.

    You should be scared. As president pro tempore of the Senate, he's third in line of succession for the presidency.
     
  20. Queso macrumors G4

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2006
    #20
    No, the DOD has it's own wide-area network with built-in redundancy, possibly even using their own dedicated cabling, high-bandwidth backbones and held together by exterior routing protocols such as BGP, but I'm pretty sure they actually have that to prevent outsiders listening in on data transmission rather than making sure their e-mails arrive quickly. If something behaves like The Internet, it doesn't make it AN Internet. It's just a very large internetwork.

    But what would I know? I've never even had an Internet arrive in my Inbox, so I'll bow to the Senator's greater knowledge :p
     
  21. FFTT macrumors 68030

    FFTT

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    #21
    Not only is it scary to think guys like this are involved in important decisions, but just imagine how vulnerable we are to an EMP weapon.

    Everything they are counting on would be worthless.
     
  22. skunk macrumors G4

    skunk

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    #22
    That's right. The only thing you'll be able to count on is an abacus.
     
  23. Queso macrumors G4

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    Mar 4, 2006
    #23
    Frank Herbert had the right idea. Mentat schools NOW!!
     
  24. Boggle macrumors 6502

    Boggle

    #24
    Son of a bitch! That rat bastard was in my bathroom for ages, and I later discovered all my dilaudid missing. It is now apparent where it all went. And it's my understanding that members of congress are forbidden to be "on the floor" under the influence of narcotics. :D
     
  25. mactastic thread starter macrumors 68040

    mactastic

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    #25
    I wish I could find it now, but I was reading a description of the hearing where net neutrality was being debated. Something along the lines of 10-20 telecom lobbyists per Senator, with aides passing arguments straight from the lobbyists to the Senators, who would then proceed to read from the telecom lobbyists argument into the Senate record.
     

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