$id = "62" ; $title = "StarFleet Redneck" ; $restricted = "0 " ; $keywords = "star fleet starfleet redneck trek specials" ; $type = "4" ; ?>
You know a member of StarFleet is a redneck when... |
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Curticy of the offical Anonymous! If you wrote this please contact me! |
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You know a member of StarFleet is a redneck when: His shuttle craft has been up on blocks for over a month He paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles He refers to Klingons as "Critters" He refers to Photon Torpedoes as "Popguns" He has the sensor array repaired with a bent coat hanger and aluminum foil He installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the saucer section He says "Got your ears on, good buddy" instead of "open hailing frequencies" He hangs fuzzy dice over the view screen He rewires his communicator into his belt buckle He keeps a six-pack under his command chair and a gun rack above it He says "Yee-Ha!" instead of "Engage" He has a hand-tooled holster for his phaser He insists on calling his executive officer "Bubba" He sets the foreword view screen to reruns of "Bassmaster" He programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens He refers to a Pulsar as a "Blue Light Special" His moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale His idea of a dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls He wears mirrored shades on the Bridge He sets his phaser to "Cajun"
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