25 years from now...


macrumors 6502a
Original poster
Nov 6, 2001
The year is 2029... !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia formally known as California. White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

Baby conceived naturally . . . scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of the Middle East, Irafsyle (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being overtaken by Jamaica.

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.

Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.

Capitol Hill intern indicted for refusing to have sex with congressman.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Florida Democrats still don't know how to use a voting machine.

The Los Angeles Bills win the Super Bowl


macrumors 68030
Jan 31, 2003
Chi Town
Not-too-subtle liberal bashing, I see...But first things first, it's still 2004 and we haven't legalized pot yet, so stop smoking it! :rolleyes: ;)

Blue Velvet

Moderator emeritus
Jul 4, 2004
25 years from now...

I'll still be reading these 'hilarious' posts that seem clipped straight from the 'Reader's Digest'.



macrumors 68030
May 11, 2004
fig tree
os xx is now 90% market share and full of viruses*

*psyche. it's 90% but no viruses at all because the "7eet haxors" still write for windows:p
homerjward said:
os xx is now 90% market share and full of viruses*

*psyche. it's 90% but no viruses at all because the "7eet haxors" still write for windows:p
Well sounds like a good thing a great idea :) ... Well maybe... Well who knows what Apples OS will be after X, I mean OS 11, 12, 13, etc... Does not look good... Well they might just stay on 10 and have deamels such as 10.5.2, 10.6.1... ETC... It would be interesting.


macrumors regular
Jul 26, 2004
Sydney, Australia
In 25 years time I'll be 42. I hope to have made a positive difference in the lives of one or two, maybe even more.

Sheesh, 2029 seems so far away. The next thing we'll know it'll be just around the corner.


macrumors 603
Jun 19, 2003
Chicago, IL
In 25 years I'll be 53. I hope they make some serious progress in medical science because with my family's history I'm screwed otherwise. As for the rest....

The year is 2032......

-In a historic moment Sharese Erickson is sworn in as president. This represents the first time in American history that a black woman has become president.

-Texas fed up with the rest of the country secedes from the Union. Texas unanimously votes George W. Bush as king. The rest of the union chips in to build a Berlin-esk wall from Louisiana to New Mexico. Scientists are currently trying to determine the best method of physically separating Texas from the rest of the Union.

-Apple finally ships the PowerMac with a two-button mouse. Steve Jobs proclaims the world is now smart enough to use one. Historian's note: Windows moved to a thought based tracking system 6 years ago however Jobs proclaimed it too difficult for users to use.

-In a bold move the Independent party nabs the Republican Party in a hostile takeover. Ralf Nadar still grabs only 1.586% of the votes. While Steve Jobs collects a respectable 27%

-In northern Minnesota white tail deer have mutated. Scientists have found deer with a thumb and index finger. In other unrelated news late last week a hunting "accident" claimed the life of a local Minnesota man. The man of 26 died under mysterious circumstances. Police aren't ruling out a possible homicide but there are currently no suspects.

-In entertainment news Disney is close to releasing Lion King XXI: Search for Aladdin's Lamp. Initial critics review praise it as a masterpiece of digital effects. Oddly though no one talks about the plot.

-Congress passes the no child left without the internet act that provides one computer for every grade school/high school child in the US. Due to Microsoft license restrictions though the computer ships without an OS. "Mommy. Why does the screen say please load OS?"

-RIAA files its next round of lawsuits. Courts judges nation wide band together to ignore the RIAA.

-Fiber optic connections to the American home surpasses 80%. Porn industry booms.

-The last of the tectonic shocks from California's separation from the North American mainland have died down to shocks less then 2.0 on the Richter scale. Historian's note: The big one came in 2026. Apple inc was the only company to realize this coming catastrophe and consequently moved their HQ to the Lake Superior shoreline in Minnesota. (Hey! A guy can dream can't he!?!?)

-The RIAA establishes A-PAS. Anti-piracy action squad. The group of ex-law enforcement mercenaries have been given the blessing of congress and the RIAA to see out and destroy any source of music piracy on the net. Their first target was a suburban home just outside Detroit. The dawn raid, in the opinion of the squad commander, went well.
"The kid didn't want to part with his computer but a tazer and a little C-4 on the hard drive was all we need to do to take care of business. When asked how many illegal songs the misguided youth had his response was somewhat bewildering "Don’t know. Don't care. I just follow my orders. I was told to take out the target and I did."

-SCO announces that they have discovered a patent in their archives that proves they own the symbol $. Any program that uses this symbol in their source code must pay a license fee.

-Civil war still rages in Iraq after the reinvasion by the new "Coalition of the Willing" in 2016 spearheaded by Gov Jeb Bush. It is believed that with the Bush brothers out of the picture; Jeb moving to Texas, that peace may actually occur in Iraq.

-In a landmark event historians nation wide have come to a consensus on the presidency of George W. Bush: "Bush was the stupidest president to occupy the oval office but his effective bull$**t campaign and his laid back somewhat common man personality was what allowed him to win in 2000 and 2004." Historian's Note: We are still trying to clean up budge nightmare George left behind.


macrumors 6502
Jun 25, 2003
Mr. Anderson said:
are these things you made up or found somewhere else?

some are quite Onionesque :D

Most of them are headlines from the year 2035


But it has mutated in the web, people have added some, and changed the date for some reason:



macrumors 68020
Aug 5, 2003
-Microsoft claims to bring a new graphic technology named Exposure.

-Develo *cough* pers, Deve *cough* lop, *cough* loper ...

-isn't that *cough* cool? it's *cough* amazing!

-One more *cough* thing.

according to reliable sources apple will introduce a new vPod mini at MWSF 29, 80 GB mini hard drives are expected.

iLife'29 will include a tenth unknown iApp ... could it be finally iwrite?


macrumors 65816
Jun 3, 2002
Sorry, this thread can't have anything to do with liberal bashing. The opening comment didn't say anything about liberals banning the bible. Afterall, that's what we liberals want to do :rolleyes:
-Accidents from cloning create super smart cats, cats now legally recognized as citizens in many countries.

-Kim Jong IL XI proclaims that he is able to feed his entire country for a change.

-There are now 300 countries after Russia broke into many small warring republics

-Super Bowl VII^2 ends in a tie after the Trenton Senators were unable to convert a 2 play against the Crawford Oil-men.

-MR membership dips in 2020 after the great purges of computer users, forums recover slowly thanks to announcements of new Powerbooks next Tuesday

-OS XX is released, Jobs is quoted why he went back to XX, because after version XXIX he did not want Apple to be associated with porn

-All of New Jersey's super fund sites are finally cleaned up

-Space-flight to Mars becomes popular after the journey was shortened from 1 year to 1 month

-After the disappointment of the Summer Olympics of 2028 the IOC announces the Olympics will be held every year in randomly drawn countries

-The latest iPod features a 10TB HD, critics claim its overpriced and too pretty looking