I graduated high school and immediately went to college. I worked extremely hard my first semester and wasn't interested or learning anything. I was a computer science major but I was taking religious studies, economics, art, etc. I really struggled socially as I never left my house in high school just focusing on building computers, jailbreaking iOS devices. My idea of a good time was going to a best buy playing with various types of technology for hours on end. My interest in technology became an obsession, as did my love for NFL football. I left college after my first semester because I didn't socialize with anybody and I wasn't learning anything. I always knew I wanted to do something with technology I just didn't know what. I had it pounded in my head during high school that people who don't go to college are failures which made me proceed to go back the following summer only online. I stopped again because I wasn't learning a thing. Lucky for me I have under 4k in student loan debt. Here I am a year and a half later and i'm just trying to find my way. I read a good 13 hours a day about technology, whether or not god exists, origins of the universe, theoretical ideas such as multiverses, and sports. I feel extremely envious over people who socialize, party, etc and excel in school without their mind wandering on and on and on about things. I'm on iTunes U reading about topics that interest me to a point of obsession trying to figure out what it is I want to do when it comes to technology. I want to work for myself in some way, shape, or form with technology. I've always been petrified of driving and would love to work remotely at home providing a service of some kind. I'll have one idea, analyze it all day everyday until I find something wrong. I think and think and think and it's getting me nowhere. I'm looking for small technological services you can provide from home is where i'm getting at. I love everything about technology except for software development. I had gotten proficient in python but found programming incredibly dull. I just want to do my own thing and put my passion and obsessiveness into something I love doing. Happiness is all that matters to me, but i'd like to be able to support myself on my efforts. Other than my Apple gadgets I'd like to live as simply as I can. I don't care about cars, houses, having a girlfriend, etc. I've talked about stuff like this in therapy and didn't get anywhere in two years even being compliant and doing everything they said. I feel a strong existential void that I believe is doing ok for myself and just living. Some outsider train of thought from a couple people would be great. Anything. Thought's, anything at all that might be useful or helpful. Don't worry about hurting my feelings just be honest. Just thought i'd post this and maybe it'd be productive. Thank you so much.