Okay, I wasn't gonna say anything about this, but...
Bill and I were at this bar a couple weeks ago, and we were joking around about how we could drink each other under the table. Well, about a half-dozen shots later, we're kinda getting a good buzz going, right? Bill looks at me with this kind of beady-eyed look, you know? Not like his regular beady-eye look, but more sinister. Anyway, he says to me, "Dude, If I lose, you can HAVE Microsoft." I'm like whoa, dude, you're trippin'. And he says, "No dude, I'm serious. I am soooo friggin tired of all this lawsuit BS, the government gettin' all in my s**t. I want out, dude...seriously." "And my wife too. Take her. I just want to take some time off. Retire maybe. Buy South America and retire."
So I'm like, "You're on, man. But you're gonna regret it."
A couple hours later, Gates is passed out. So I figure I'm the new head of Microsoft now, right? So the first thing I did was bought everyone a round to celebrate. It felt good, you know? A while passes and he's still out like a light. So I toss him the keys to my Dodge and snatch the keys to his Mercedes and head home...to my new home.
The next day, he calls me and says, "Hey dude, I was just kidding about that handing over Microsoft s**t." Needless to say, I'm kinda bummed at this point. I mean, I had a pedicure scheduled for later and had already sent the plane over to Japan to pick up some sushi for dinner.
The way I figure it, a deal's a deal. My word is my bond. And I think Bill should be held to the same standard. As far as I'm concerned, Microsoft should be mine. I had big plans. I had sushi on the way.
I was thinking about getting a lawyer, but...you know, Bill's a friend. An Indian giver yeah, but a friend. I guess on the plus side I got the chance to live the life of a multi-bizzilionaire for a day. But if you asked me, it's not really all it's cracked up to be. Family always calling asking for money. Every ten minutes a lawyer's calling about some BS lawsuit thing. And you know the weirdest thing of all...you know his wife?
Fembot. Yeah...never could get her going for nothin'. Not even a little handy.
