California politician arrested

Discussion in 'Politics, Religion, Social Issues' started by jkcerda, Dec 14, 2018.

  1. Raid macrumors 68020

    Raid

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2003
    Location:
    Toronto
    #51
    This is what works better in the long run IMHO, people may feel it's the touchy-feely way of coddling a child but it really isn't. You teach them the consequences to their actions, make them atone for their misdeeds and get them to understand the reasons why the rules like that are in place. This takes a hell of a lot of effort on behalf of the parent and the child, but the child is always the better for it. Now there maybe a time and place for immediate correction but a spanking shouldn't be the go to solution... maybe the three strikes solution when the time for a sit down, and atonement isn't quite possible.
     
  2. Sydde macrumors 68020

    Sydde

    Joined:
    Aug 17, 2009
    Location:
    Velvet Green
    #52
    Spanking (when a child is able to communicate reasonably) simply reinforces the concept of violence as a way to deal with problems, and punishment that is not proximal to the offending behavior is ineffective in all situations.
     
  3. VulchR macrumors 68020

    VulchR

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2009
    Location:
    Scotland
    #53
    I come from the generations when teachers meted out corporal punishment - in my primary school this amounted to spanking with a ping-pong paddle (because I was a 'beastly nuisance'). However, what adults seem to be trying to accomplish with spanking won't happen. Adults want the kid to associate their bad behaviour with the punishment, but that is not what happens, particularity if there is a delay between the offending behaviour and the punishment. What does happen is the kid associates the adult with the punishment, because the specter of a full-blown adult many times the kid's mass getting ready to hit is the most salient thing on the kid's mind, not some memory of past mischief. Perhaps at a very superficial level spanking might make the kid 'respect' the adult, but more likely it will cause faux-respect based on conditioned fear, stress and avoidance when the kid interacts with the adult again. What it specifically won't do is cause the kid to associate the bad behaviour with a negative outcome.

    IMO spanking only really works block ongoing self-reinforcing patterns of bad behaviour (e.g. destructive tantrums that risks causing harm to the kid or others). Basically, it's only good to grab the kid's attention long enough so that they stop acting like a demon-spawn and listen to the adult. Once you can break the cycle of the self-reinforcement of the bad behaviour, you can then explain things to the kid and inform them what will happen if they do it again. I don't think spanking and smacking should be illegal, but as a strategy to make kids behave, it is bound to fail.

    FWIW those of you with young kids: in my experience you can have fully rational conversations with kids when they reach the age of 23 or so, so there's hope....
     
  4. bambooshots Suspended

    bambooshots

    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2013
    #54
    Stop. You're giving me flashbacks!
     

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