Cosby for President!

Discussion in 'Politics, Religion, Social Issues' started by dukebound85, Sep 12, 2008.

  1. dukebound85 macrumors P6

    dukebound85

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    #1
    A friend sent this email and I thought it was pretty good lol


    I HAVE DECIDED TO BECOME A WRITE-IN CANDIDATE.
    HERE IS MY PLATFORM:

    (1) "Press 1 for English" is immediately banned. English is the official language; speak it or wait at the border until you can.

    (2) We will immediately go into a two year isolationist posture to straighten out the country's attitude. NO imports,! no exp orts.
    We will use the 'Wal-Mart's policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't need it.'

    (3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.

    (4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one of our many observation towers on the southern border. (six month tour) They will be under strict orders not to fire on SOUTHBOUND aliens.

    (5) Social security will immediately return to its original state. If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. The president nor any other politician will not be able to touch it.

    (6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of the 40 hour school week and the successful completion of urinalysis and a passing grade.

    (7) Professional Athletes --Steroids - The FIRST time you check positive you're banned for life.

    (8) Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method, the first time you steal, you lose your right hand. There is no more life sentences. If convicted, you will be put to death by the same method you chose for your victim; gun, knife, strangulation, etc.
    (9) One export will be allowed; Wheat, The world needs to eat. A bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.

    (10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately cease, and the saved money will pay off the national debt and ultimately lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll ask the American people if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and each citizen can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.

    (11) The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school and every day in Congress.

    12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc.

    Sorry if I stepped on anyone's toes but a vote for me will get you better than what you have, and better than what you're gonna get. Thanks for listening, and remember to write in my name on the ballot in November.
    God Bless America !!!!!!!!!!!
    Bill Cosby!!!!!!!!
     
  2. it5five macrumors 65816

    it5five

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  3. dukebound85 thread starter macrumors P6

    dukebound85

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    #3
    ha probably why i like it (well majority of the points lol)
     
  4. PlaceofDis macrumors Core

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  5. mkrishnan Moderator emeritus

    mkrishnan

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  6. MacNut macrumors Core

    MacNut

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  7. PlaceofDis macrumors Core

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    #8
    well its good to know that he didn't actually write that, that kinda scared me right there. :p
     
  8. zap2 macrumors 604

    zap2

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  9. leekohler macrumors G5

    leekohler

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    #10
    Umm...wow. I used to like Bill Cosby. I hope he was joking.
     
  10. Peterkro macrumors 68020

    Peterkro

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    #11
    Cosby is a bit of a dick but I don't think he's actually insane so it didn't occur to me he may have written it.
     
  11. noaccess macrumors 6502

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    #12
    Looks like he didn't write it at all.
     
  12. skunk macrumors G4

    skunk

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    #13
    Did you say that out loud?
     
  13. dukebound85 thread starter macrumors P6

    dukebound85

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    #14
    i agree with points 5, 6 (to an extent), 10, 11 and 12. the other ones are a little too extreme for my liking

    i somewhat support point 1, however the points about being no import/export, crime punishments, steroids and guards serving the southern boarder are a little too extreme for me
     
  14. CalBoy macrumors 604

    CalBoy

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    #15
    I doubt you agree with it on principle, but rather that it affirms some basic fears that many Americans share.

    Points 1 and 4 deal with a swelling Latin-American immigrant population, which threatens many people not because they are xenophobic, but because they fear a changing of cultural values. Similar things were felt by the 1840s New York population when the Irish arrived in droves, and for America as a whole during the late 1800s/early 1900s when Eastern European immigrants began to arrive en masse. The feeling will pass once people realize how universal culture really is.

    Points 5 and 6 deal directly with an issue that many Americans seem to love to hate: the welfare state. It's ironic because the very reason Americans hate the welfare state is because they don't get many direct benefits from it, while European (or rather non-US) systems have benefits that cover everyone, not just the poor or elderly.

    Points 2, 3, 9, and 10 all show a general fear among Americans that we are losing importance on the World Stage as other economies overtake us and we are crippled by rising energy costs. On these points, we can only blame ourselves and Republican administrations, because there were ample steps that could have been taken to prevent such calamities long ago (namely building infrastructure, investing in education, and working to retrain rather than neglect former industrial workers).

    Point 7 really has nothing to do at all with politics in my opinion, because that's a matter for sports leagues to figure out on their own.

    Point 8 is really just there to appeal to our ethos, even though most of us realize that such a criminal "justice" system would be quite contrary to modern interpretations of 'cruel and unusual punishment.'

    Points 11 and 12 are really remarkable, because they are possibly the most un-American ideas I've ever read. Freedom and liberty are only worth a dime when you defend those whose position you hate.
     
  15. it5five macrumors 65816

    it5five

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    #16
    The pledge, seriously? I stopped reciting that nationalistic tripe when I was in kindergarten.

    It reminds me of an absurd law that was passed here in AZ a few years back, requiring the flag and constitution to be posted in every single classroom on college campuses. It was an incredible waste of money and a huge hassle for large universities (like Arizona State) to coordinate it all.
     
  16. skunk macrumors G4

    skunk

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    #17
    I hesitate to even engage you on this, since it seems superfluous to make a serious argument about something which in any other country in the world would be regarded as out-and-out satire, but the mere fact that you can (a) contemplate this, and (b) admit to it, demonstrates - if demonstration were needed - how far off the rest of the world's scale "mainstream" US politics has strayed. Anywhere else, these views would be classified as "extremist", and anyone who held them would be regarded as a certifiable lunatic. In the USA, however, a major political party can espouse such views, together with a literal interpretation of the bible and an absolute faith in the fairy stories of the Trinity and the Last Days, and still be taken seriously by half the population. When half the voting population of the most powerful country in the world are so dangerously delusional, all of us are in deep doodoo.
     
  17. dukebound85 thread starter macrumors P6

    dukebound85

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    #18
    yes i support saying the pledge of allegiance
     
  18. CalBoy macrumors 604

    CalBoy

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    #19
    For whom?

    And, why?
     
  19. leekohler macrumors G5

    leekohler

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    #20
    It didn't seem like he did. Sounds more like a job for O'Reilly or Limbaugh.

    The original version, or the one with "under God" added? Oh- and why?
     
  20. MacNut macrumors Core

    MacNut

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    #21
    This is America and people should have to learn the language.

    I think tis is a little strong but we do need to produce more at home.

    There should be some tax but not that much.

    That one seems like a waste of time.

    It should be get out of it what you put into it.

    Why should we just hand out checks if people won't work for them.

    Makes sense.

    A little harsh but it would give criminals something to think about.
    I don't see how veasible that would be.
    How can you argue this one?

    agreed

    agreed
     
  21. skunk macrumors G4

    skunk

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    #22
    I am completely gobsmacked. None of these notions is remotely defensible, let alone desirable.
     
  22. dukebound85 thread starter macrumors P6

    dukebound85

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    #23
    extreme? ill go over the points i agreed with

    5) what is wrong about wanting social security to be there when i need it? rather than have it leached out by those who get much more than they put in. I pay ss from every paycheck but it is widely believed it will not be there when i need it

    6) what is wrong with making sure those that need welfare are trying to better their lives than rely on welfare as their "job". i believe there should be effort on the individual's part to get off welfare. how is that extreme?

    10) what is wrong with wanting to get our nation out of debt (over 9.6 trillion) with our tax money rather than spend that money on causes around the world with no say from the public? this debt is one contributing factor for the state of our dollar right now which IS having a direct impact on my life. what's so wrong wanting to fix that?

    11) what is wrong with saying pledge of allegiance to the country which gives you freedoms we enjoy as Americans. i realize some of you may not agree but that is how i feel.

    12)what is wrong playing the national anthem at events? its done so already at every spoting event, olympics, etc. are you against building a sense of nationality within a community? i dont know about you and your country but i am proud to say i am an American. without some things like this, it would be difficult to have the people of a nation all feel connected in some way. did you see the public's immediate reaction to 9/11 when the whole country came together? flags outside every house? that is what i am talking about, a common bond and feeling for a whole as a country

    how is that too extreme? how is this "lunacy" as you say it? please enlighten me
     
  23. rdowns macrumors Penryn

    rdowns

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    #24
    Wow, was pretty easy to find an appropriate image.
     

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  24. PlaceofDis macrumors Core

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    #25
    what language is that? we have no national language.
     

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