server logistics
http://www.serverlogistics.com/software.php
this is THE place to go for mysql, php, tomcat (java) and cocoon (xml). all the installers there configure to work with each other. it is trully a turn-key installation--it just works! i used the installers there for my server at home, and we used it at work for out intranet. so easy! i had a little trouble with tomcat, but i think that was my fault.
as far as learning it, do you have any previous experience with something like asp or jsp? if not, i would reccommend a wrox book. i've had nothing but good experiences with them. if you're taking previous experience and "moving over" to php, php.net is probably all you will need. the api is explained reasonably well and it provides just-ok examples. it is perfect if you already know a little bit about programming. o'reilly makes great books for the non-beginner, but they probably wouldn't have anything you can't find at php.net or some php online forum site.
one more thing, if you already know asp, google for asp2php. (i'm too lazy to do it for you!) i learned a great deal using it when i moved over from asp. i could write 100% asp, drag and drop the file to asp2php, and voila, a php page. then i could see what to do to make the switch. (am i a swicher? asp2php-resistance is not futile!)
anyway, i'm rambling... if you need anything else, just let me know via email. i enjoy helping out, plus i usually end up learning something by showing someone else how. good luck!