Stripper goes to nursing home, elderly resident's son goes to court

iBlazed

macrumors 68000
Original poster
Feb 27, 2014
1,593
1,224
New Jersey, United States
Not sure how I feel about this one. On one hand, the entire 16 member resident panel unanimously approved it and have done this on multiple occasions in the past without issue. On the other hand, the woman in the photo has dementia, but then you factor in that she must have decided to keep the photo and never complained about it. Her son is the one who's outraged. What do you think? Legit complaint or obvious money grab?

(CNN) -- Somebody at a New York nursing home apparently thought it would be a great idea to bring in a young hard body for the elderly residents to watch dance.
In other words, a male stripper.
But after a man found a picture in his 86-year-old mother's belongings of a man wearing only "tighty whiteys" hovering very much in his mom's personal space, the lawyers got involved.
Bernice Youngblood, the wheelchair-bound resident whose son, Franklin, is suing the home on her behalf, told CNN affiliate WCBS, "I felt terrible. I was shaken and going on."
WCBS reported that the East Neck Nursing and Rehabilitation Center in West Babylon said all 16 people on a panel of residents approved the show.
"There is nothing inappropriate about it," the facility's attorney, Howard Fensterman, told reporters on Tuesday.
Fensterman, according to the WCBS report, said that Bernice Youngblood enjoyed the event and was chaperoned by her son's live-in girlfriend, who the nursing home said appears in the photo.
The family said the woman in the photo is a nursing-home staff member.
According to a lawsuit filed last month, Bernice Youngblood, who the suit says has partial dementia, was "confused and bewildered" when the stripper approached her and directed her to "place her hands about and upon his body, including his genital area."
The suit contends the home has hired male strippers on other occasions for the "perverse pleasure of the defendant's staff."
Franklin Youngblood said his mother was forced to tip the stripper with her own money, which is supposed to be locked away at the nurses' station.
"There's too much sex and craziness that's going on. Now they're bringing it to the nursing home, and it don't belong here," he told WCBS.
The suit is asking for a financial judgment of unspecified amounts from a jury at trial. It is unclear from the legal documents when the stripping incident occurred.
Link
 

Nov 28, 2010
22,668
27
located
And another example of people being afraid of sex, understandably of course, since they do not have sex and old people definitely should not have sex.

It is just a misguided person doing this, but sadly, even those get guided by the blind.

At least it is only happening in the greatest, ahem, biggest, ahem, in that country that ****s itself quite often.
 

ElectronGuru

macrumors 65816
Sep 5, 2013
1,492
360
Oregon, USA
Two thoughts...

This is a 'volutaryness' test. If the stripper wanted it and the mom wanted it, whats the problem? Now if the place was using the son's money for a service that wasn't listed, that gets more complicated.

Each time the baby boomers go through a life stage, they tend to revolutionize both what the participants of that stage can do and how society views the stage. Im looking forward to see how they change old age.
 

iBlazed

macrumors 68000
Original poster
Feb 27, 2014
1,593
1,224
New Jersey, United States
Each time the baby boomers go through a life stage, they tend to revolutionize both what the participants of that stage can do and how society views the stage. Im looking forward to see how they change old age.
Me too. My mom is in the baby boomer generation and she said she would have no problem with this. They might end up being fun old people.
 

quagmire

macrumors 603
Apr 19, 2004
6,256
1,061
Simple. His mother beat his ass when she caught him with porn, etc when he was younger. Now its time for revenge and why not make some money while doing it? :p
 

NukeIT

macrumors regular
Mar 20, 2013
233
0
Son is just upset that momma was getting a little action that wasn't daddy!!
 

rdowns

macrumors Penryn
Jul 11, 2003
27,345
12,408
And another example of people being afraid of sex, understandably of course, since they do not have sex and old people definitely should not have sex.

Why shouldn't old people have sex? Must be an example of being afraid of sex. :rolleyes:
 

Shrink

macrumors G3
Feb 26, 2011
8,914
1,596
New England, USA
Why shouldn't old people have sex? Must be an example of being afraid of sex. :rolleyes:
I think the comment was meant ironically...or, at least, I hope so.:D

In Mass, Nursing Homes are, in theory, supposed to provide some privacy arrangement for a resident to engage in sexual contact with a spouse or significant other.

In my experience, I've never been aware of this actually happening...but it is supposed to be available to residents.
 
Last edited:
Nov 28, 2010
22,668
27
located
Why shouldn't old people have sex? Must be an example of being afraid of sex. :rolleyes:
Me afraid from sex: definitely, but I do not care if others have sex, unless I shall be involved.

I think the comment was meant ironically...or, at least, I hope so.:D

In Mass, Nursing Homes are, in theory, supposed to provide some privacy arrangement for a resident to engage in sexual contact with a spouse or significant other.

In my experience, I've never been aware of this actually happening...but it is supposed to be available to residents.
I rarely mean something not ironic, except battery viruses.
 

stylinexpat

macrumors 68000
Mar 6, 2009
1,578
2,426
Now here a business to open up lol.. Happy nursing homes :p nursing homes for happy endings :p I could see this doing well in Japan lol..

Happy endings meaning entertainment during their last remaining days in nursing homes.
 

EvilQueen

macrumors 6502
Aug 15, 2013
261
21
In my own world
Yep, when I worked as the maintenance manager at a nursing home we were sued because we took a group to a bar for lunch. They old guys wanted a bar burger and a beer and wanted to watch some baseball.

So we took them. They are adults. We got papers served to the home from a woman that didn't even have a family member in the home.
 

stylinexpat

macrumors 68000
Mar 6, 2009
1,578
2,426
Yep, when I worked as the maintenance manager at a nursing home we were sued because we took a group to a bar for lunch. They old guys wanted a bar burger and a beer and wanted to watch some baseball.

So we took them. They are adults. We got papers served to the home from a woman that didn't even have a family member in the home.
Are you in America? Lol..
 

Southern Dad

macrumors 68000
May 23, 2010
1,532
547
Shady Dale, Georgia
Yep, when I worked as the maintenance manager at a nursing home we were sued because we took a group to a bar for lunch. They old guys wanted a bar burger and a beer and wanted to watch some baseball.

So we took them. They are adults. We got papers served to the home from a woman that didn't even have a family member in the home.
Isn't our legal system wonderful? The only people who made money on that lawsuit were the lawyers.
 

rdowns

macrumors Penryn
Jul 11, 2003
27,345
12,408
Yep, when I worked as the maintenance manager at a nursing home we were sued because we took a group to a bar for lunch. They old guys wanted a bar burger and a beer and wanted to watch some baseball.

So we took them. They are adults. We got papers served to the home from a woman that didn't even have a family member in the home.

Would seem to me that the lawsuit would be thrown out as the woman would have no standing.
 

jkcerda

macrumors 6502a
Jun 10, 2013
682
38,955
Criminal Mexi Midget
Two thoughts...

This is a 'volutaryness' test. If the stripper wanted it and the mom wanted it, whats the problem? Now if the place was using the son's money for a service that wasn't listed, that gets more complicated.

Each time the baby boomers go through a life stage, they tend to revolutionize both what the participants of that stage can do and how society views the stage. Im looking forward to see how they change old age.
how does anyone know if the mom "wanted" it? from link

According to a lawsuit filed last month, Bernice Youngblood, who the suit says has partial dementia, was "confused and bewildered" when the stripper approached her and directed her to "place her hands about and upon his body, including his genital area."
if the lady is not "all there" then she is being taken advantage of.

I might have to reconsider my beaner ways, family does not believe in nursing homes, we die at home :D
 

tshrimp

macrumors 6502
Mar 30, 2012
366
2,657
how does anyone know if the mom "wanted" it? from link

if the lady is not "all there" then she is being taken advantage of.

I might have to reconsider my beaner ways, family does not believe in nursing homes, we die at home :D
I was kind of on the side of "who cares", but you made a good point. What if the person is not all there? Many in Nursing Homes are fine, but some are there because ... well...because they are not all there. If the case is that the person is 100% in their right mind then who cares, but if they are not then it is a problem.
 

Shrink

macrumors G3
Feb 26, 2011
8,914
1,596
New England, USA
I might have to reconsider my beaner ways, family does not believe in nursing homes, we die at home :D
It's not an issue of "believing" in Nursing Homes for many people. The years of 24/7/365 care required by many people as a result of Alzheimer's Disease, for example, is not something many families can provide. We're not talking about a terminally ill person with cancer, for example, who wishes to die at home, it is more the constant care required by many dementia patients that goes on for many years, and requires that there be someone present 24 hours a day, as the individual cannot ever be left alone because they might hurt themselves (and possibly others through fire, for example). Not all families are in the position of either having a family member present at all times, or the expense of hiring someone to fulfill that function.

It's not the dying at home that is the issue, but the many years leading up to that eventuality.

Please understand, I am not questioning the desirability of being cared for at home over being cared for in a Nursing Home. And your family (and cultural) tradition of dying at home is to be desired, and envied. It is, however, not always possible.
 

jkcerda

macrumors 6502a
Jun 10, 2013
682
38,955
Criminal Mexi Midget
I was kind of on the side of "who cares", but you made a good point. What if the person is not all there? Many in Nursing Homes are fine, but some are there because ... well...because they are not all there. If the case is that the person is 100% in their right mind then who cares, but if they are not then it is a problem.
that was the ONLY reason I objected, Seniors are taken advantage of all the time, http://www.ftc.gov/news-events/press-releases/2014/03/ftc-stops-mass-telemarketing-scam-defrauded-us-seniors-others-out they are pretty vulnerable.

----------

It's not an issue of "believing" in Nursing Homes for many people. The years of 24/7/365 care required by many people as a result of Alzheimer's Disease, for example, is not something many families can provide. We're not talking about a terminally ill person with cancer, for example, who wishes to die at home, it is more the constant care required by many dementia patients that goes on for many years, and requires that there be someone present 24 hours a day, as the individual cannot ever be left alone because they might hurt themselves (and possibly others through fire, for example). Not all families are in the position of either having a family member present at all times, or the expense of hiring someone to fulfill that function.

It's not the dying at home that is the issue, but the many years leading up to that eventuality.

Please understand, I am not questioning the desirability of being cared for at home over being cared for in a Nursing Home. And your family (and cultural) tradition of dying at home is to be desired, and envied. It is, however, not always possible.
I completely understand that, mom has the beginnings of Alzheimers, we are lucky I have 2 sisters & one brother who CAN care for her 24/7, mom is 92 Y/O, she still smokes like there is no tomorrow but her mind is going :(
 

Shrink

macrumors G3
Feb 26, 2011
8,914
1,596
New England, USA
I completely understand that, mom has the beginnings of Alzheimers, we are lucky I have 2 sisters & one brother who CAN care for her 24/7, mom is 92 Y/O, she still smokes like there is no tomorrow but her mind is going :(
I'm very sorry to hear about you mom. I'm also very happy for her that she will be able to be cared for at home. Nursing Homes are a necessity for many...but far from the ideal solution, and not a place that I would want to end up.

If your mom made it to 92...aside from the possible issue of fire caused by her smoking and possibly putting a lit cigarette down in the wrong place...the hell with it! Let her enjoy her cigarettes (sorry for the second hand smoke)!

When my mom was about 95, it drove me nuts that her doc was giving her grief about her cholesterol level and telling her to cut down on problematic foods. What crap! If I make it to 95, not only will I eat whatever the hell I want, I will smoke, drink, and do heroin if I want!:D