Suicide of teen

Discussion in 'Politics, Religion, Social Issues' started by jkcerda, Sep 12, 2017.

  1. jkcerda macrumors 6502a

    jkcerda

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    #1
    https://www.yahoo.com/news/suicide-teen-made-sex-video-shows-dilemma-schools-154148868.html
    girl in question did not know she was being recorded, kid had pics of other teens in his phone shared by others.
     
  2. Raid macrumors 68020

    Raid

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    #2
    Basically the kid had no advocate during the search of his phone, no parents, no lawyer. I don't know if the school was complicit in the search, but the officer should have known better and at the very least should have had the kids parents there. I wonder if the kid had some direct counselling and support he'd be alive. In this instance while it may be technically 'child porn' I wouldn't call it justice done.
     
  3. VulchR macrumors 68020

    VulchR

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    #3
    If I am not mistaken, in the UK minors cannot be questioned unless parents - or a suitable adult who can act as their advocate - is present. Seems reasonable...
     
  4. lowendlinux Contributor

    lowendlinux

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    #4
    If a cop needs to be in the room than the parents need to also.
     
  5. Zombie Acorn macrumors 65816

    Zombie Acorn

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    #5
    Pretty easy solution for schools: ban all cell phone usage.
     
  6. ThisBougieLife, Sep 12, 2017
    Last edited: Sep 12, 2017

    ThisBougieLife macrumors 68000

    ThisBougieLife

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    #6
    The idea that you can be in possession of "child porn" for having photos of yourself is ridiculous. To quote Family Guy on this: "the law just hasn't caught up to how cool kids are nowadays".

    But in this case, since he also had photos of others, the situation may be a bit different, especially if the parents of the other teens whose photos were on his phone get involved. In any case, I believe his parents should've been contacted and arrived before they began searching and questioning him, and they could've gone from there.

    Teens are especially prone to thinking their life is ruined when it may not actually be. But being labeled a sex offender for life is certainly grounds for having ruined one's life.
     
  7. yaxomoxay macrumors 68040

    yaxomoxay

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    #7
    Sorry for the kid, certainly not happy about his tragic death. However, old enough to drive old enough to know basic laws and rights. School was right in asking questions before raising hell and before worrying parents about something that might not even be true.
    He should've not admitted fault.
     
  8. BoxerGT2.5 macrumors 68000

    BoxerGT2.5

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    #8
    No sympathy for the kid. If he's out bragging and showing his friends and the girl ends up the one who kills herself due to the shame, his parents are going to be singing a very different tune. The kid recorded someone without their consent and shared it, he broke the law, clearly he was too mentally fragile to deal with those ramifications.
     
  9. Raid macrumors 68020

    Raid

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    #9
    I can understand why sympathy for this kid would be low, his acts were illegal and could have had much larger consequences for the victims. But to call him mentally fragile is pretty cold. He was, by many accounts, a good kid. Within minutes his prospects for a good, normal future went way down and with no one to stop him from that train of thought this was the conclusion. He deserved punishment, and he needed to make things right, but he didn't deserve to die.
     
  10. BoxerGT2.5, Sep 13, 2017
    Last edited: Sep 13, 2017

    BoxerGT2.5 macrumors 68000

    BoxerGT2.5

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    #10
    He decided to take his own life, no one else made that decision for him. Personal responsibility! I mean if a teacher gave him a final grade of a C and it ruined his chances to get into U of I and he killed himself should the teacher be held responsible? I call him mentally fragile because that is what kids are these days. You're adult enough to drive and screw, you screw up by recording a girl having sex with you (and share it with whomever) and then suddenly he's a "child" who made a mistake? So we should be sympathetic to his parents? It's horrible for a parent to lose a child, clearly they didn't know there's as well as they thought they did.
     
  11. Raid macrumors 68020

    Raid

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    #11
    Not suddenly, he was a child. His actions denote the mental capability to acknowledge his guilt, and understand the worst ramifications that might have occurred. He might not have had the chance to come to terms with that, and adults have that problem as well.
     
  12. VulchR macrumors 68020

    VulchR

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    #12
    I won't go into to specifics but one of my kids was sent pictures that resulted in the sender, another kid, getting a conviction. To me the punishment was not harsh enough in my family's case given the damage that was caused. So I know how it feels to want to see a kid punished for hurting another, believe me. Still, no matter how well-intentioned the school of the police officer were in this case, there is no way that this should have resulted in the death of anybody. Imagine how the girl in the picture sparking the complaint feels now... (no doubt the staff in the school and the police officer feel crap as well - this was a tragedy for everybody)
     
  13. BoxerGT2.5 macrumors 68000

    BoxerGT2.5

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    #13
    Hence the "mentally fragile".
    --- Post Merged, Sep 13, 2017 ---
    Don't get me wrong, I think it sucks all the way around. Do you really think we should approach all children now with the expectation that if we hand them bad news they will end up killing themselves? I mean we have college aged kids right now who need safe spaces and can't handle hearing opposing views, so maybe we should?
     
  14. Raid macrumors 68020

    Raid

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    #14
    Sounds like you jest at scars that never felt a wound. I hope all the troubles you face never appear insurmountable and permanent.
     
  15. jkcerda thread starter macrumors 6502a

    jkcerda

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    #15
    kid died by his own actions, parents SHOULD have been there and the SCHOOL should have informed them of what was going on.
     
  16. BoxerGT2.5 macrumors 68000

    BoxerGT2.5

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    #16
    I've faced plenty, never once did the thought of taking my own life enter my mind when things didn't go my way. Then again I was raised in a family that had to fight and claw their way to the middle class. I was raised that if someone knocks you down you get the **** up. You work harder than the next person and that's how you get ahead. Don't bitch and moan, no one cares. That others don't have to like you, you don't have to like others, but at least have respect for others.

    If the first thought that goes through the mind of a kid who's in trouble for the first time is to kill himself, I question what his life was like at home.
     
  17. haxrnick macrumors 6502a

    haxrnick

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    #17
    I agree with this. I have no empathy/sympathy for people who take their own lives. It's the ultimate narcissistic move one can make. I don't fault the kid, however, for making the decision he made. I fault the parents for not raising a child who knows how to cope with things when they don't get the expected outcome. Many people, and I can include myself, fault millennials for their behavior when in reality it's all they know due to the terrible upbringing from their parents. And with the advent of social media I don't see the pendulum swinging back any time soon.
     
  18. jkcerda thread starter macrumors 6502a

    jkcerda

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    #18
    don't know, can't really prepare your kids for the "you are going to spend the rest your life in jail and register as a sex offender all because you decided to record what you were doing so you could brag to others about it " blah blah blah.....
    I DID have that combo with BOTH my son & daughter, specially her as I pointed out the idiot she was in "love" with would be more than happy to share anything she gave him if things ever went south. hell I showed her https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Revenge_porn
    cops/school should NOT have been involved w/o the parents present from BOTH sides.
     
  19. blackfox macrumors 65816

    blackfox

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    #19
    So I'm a bit confused. This kid had pictures taken without consent, but minors can't give consent anyway. Are other kids being prosecuted since most of the photos on his phone were received from others? If you can't give consent as a minor, how were the Authorities able to access his phone without Legal Consent? Lastly, usually statutory-rape charges don't apply if the people in question were/are both minors and within a year os so of age with each other...shouldn't this apply to sexting also(with consent that's not legally-binding)?
     
  20. Mousse macrumors 68000

    Mousse

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    #20
    Well, not THAT specific scenario. If you do have to, then you've already screwed up as a parent.

    Anyhow, you can prepare them for hardship, toughen them up. I grew up poor, so whenever Christmas rolled around, all my classmates got great presents. (Santa Claus was an elitist bastard who gives the best presents to rich kids.:oops:) I got nut'in, zilch, nada, not even a lump of coal. What I did get was a lesson in character building. I learned to appreciate what I had: a roof over my head, a loving family, a warm bed. They taught me no matter how bad I have it, there is someone else worse off. "I was sad for I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet."

    As a parents, we need to teach our kids that when they hit rock bottom, there is nowhere to go but up. If we don't, then when they hit rock bottom, they keep on digging.
     
  21. yaxomoxay macrumors 68040

    yaxomoxay

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    #21
    Not necessarily. They better do their due dilingence before calling me at work, alleging that my son is a perv that shares porn revenge videos of minors.

    (But once they confirm it, they better save the kid from me)
     
  22. BoxerGT2.5 macrumors 68000

    BoxerGT2.5

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    #22
    I ended up being held in Rolling Meadows Jail for 4hrs in high school once They called my mother and she told them to hang on to me for a little bit and to put me in a cell with the biggest black guy they had there. lol
     
  23. HEK, Sep 13, 2017
    Last edited: Sep 13, 2017

    HEK macrumors 68040

    HEK

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    #23
    Kid should have taken counseler, teacher, dean and school cop with him. Time for victims to stand up to tormentors. The adults could have just erased the pictures video, give kid his phone back and quietly talked to parents and be done with it. But no, these holier than thou self righteous sobs have to ruin kids life to point he kills himself. Child porn my ass. Kids doing what kids do, make poor decisions. Just happens now with technology recording it now.

    I'm sure the dean and school cop were just perfect model teens, never did anything wrong. I hope parents law suit gets em all fired and closes the school. Kids, don't say a word, demand a lawyer and your parents. never unlock your phone before you have lawyer. Don't let bully cops and adult school officials BS you.
     
  24. Mousse macrumors 68000

    Mousse

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    #24
    In the adult world, such actions are called cover ups. Invariably such actions brings down not just the kid, but the entire establishment that covered up the kid's actions. The kid gambled on a bet he could not cover. Stock brokers have done the same thing and took the same actions as a consequence.

    Still I lay the blame at the parent's feet. They raised him to believe such actions like teen sex and voyeurism is acceptable. They coddled him so that he couldn't handle a little hardship. Most of us who were raised right, made stupid mistakes. Hail, I've made more than my fair share; I've peed on a lot of electric fences in my days. But unlike this kid, we owned up to our mistake. We faced the consequences, took our lumps like the men we grew up to be.
     
  25. rhett7660, Sep 14, 2017
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2017

    rhett7660 macrumors G5

    rhett7660

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    #25
    Actually case law says other wise, you do not have to notify or have them present when questioning a minor. You do have to be careful if you are venturing towards a line of questioning/interrogating/custodial interrogation then their is the question of Miranda etc, and if the police wish, the parent doesn't have to be in the same room as the minor being questioned. They can ask for a lawyer just like an adult etc. What does have to be taken into account, is the age and mental age of the minor. But that brings up a whole other line of question outside of Miranda. Gladys R. Questionnaire.

    Now there maybe a question of policy's by the agency in question, which is not stated.
     

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46 September 12, 2017