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Discussion in 'Community' started by monkeybat, Jun 30, 2004.
Do tell. For the last two years I've been feeling really depressed.
So, just wondered what you did.
Before we start exchanging tips for feeling good when occasional moods get us down, you should find out if you have a medical problem, monkeybat. If you've been feeling bad for two years, that's a big problem. You're not enjoying life as you should. Make a trip to the doctor and find out. Either way, you'll be glad to know.
Now, as for temporary mood boosters, I can think of a few, but of course what cheers someone up is a personal thing. But chances are that an occasional trip to the video store would be fun for almost anyone. Rent a movie and, while watching, you're bound to forget about the rest of the world. Comedy, drama, action, whatever you like.
Then there's the opposite approach: Get off the sofa and get out of the house. For example, exercise can make you feel better. If you join a club, you can make it a social experience too.
I hope what people suggest here will help you.
well i can try to help. Last year in september i posted a thread cause my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me and it hurt very much. got some good advice but i was still depressed, so i will shed some light on what i did.
first thing i started hanging with the guys more and more. we would hang out almost everyweekend and we would do all kinds of things. go get pizzas everyweekends, go to our schools sporting events every friday, movies all the time, it felt real great. i also started blogging. i never knew how much i enjoyed writing until i started my blog. to this day i still blog and i am about to 300 pages now and its fun to go back read and see how much i have changed.
i have found myself this year happier than i ahve ever been after she left me and even after dealing with the wreck. i am more outgoing, dated many girls during this final year of high school (waiting for some real girls in college ), went to europe, just got into skydiving, offroad alot. it took alot of time but i am extremely happy.
but a lot of this depends on what you are depressed about, whether its something like a girl, or a tragic event or whatever it might be, they all need different approaches when helping them. if you feel comfortable say what you are actually depressed about. we have a wide selection of people here on this forum and you may be surprised that someone may have gone through the same thing you did.
try to have fun and enjoy life. now im going to go back and dig up that old thread and see how much of a dork i was.
I'm with Doctor Q. If this has been a long-term feeling, then chances are, the short-term pick-me-ups mentioned here won't be of much use. You really should consult with a physician. After all, there's a possibility that the way you're feeling doesn't stem from anything psychological that could be dealt with in a typical manner; you could be experiencing a chemical imbalance of some sort. Whether it is psychological, physiological, or really nothing at all, it might be a good idea to ask someone who can make an informed diagnosis: That is, a competent physician.
I go out to eat at a restaurant that i can't afford! always makes me feel better
Duff-Man says....yeah...2 years is a long time so you should really being seeing a doctor about it. Perhaps you need to see a psychologist or counselor? Do you have any idea what has brought this on? The short-term cures for little depressions like "winter blahs" (for me it is going out and buying some new cd's and having a music marathon) are not the same as what you seem to need at this point...think about where you are at and what has brought this on, then go for the appropriate help.....oh yeah!
Sit back and appreciate being alive. No matter how bad your situation is, at least you're breathing and not ten feet under.
That might sound harsh, and some [religious] people might not agree with this assertion. This simply helps me when I'm feeling down.
You wrote my words today dude, let me give you my experience because today I feel like crap, I am about to brake down in tears and it have been like that for a few months now, actually, for a few years but moving form my country to NY and if you remember, my episode with my german girl... I feel like crap. But those are cycles.
I was taking Lexapro for a month, that si what any body is going to prescribe you:
1. Because they have to cover their backs in case you hurt yourself.
2. It is a big comision they get.
Now, I quit taking Lexapro because I couldn't feel anything, as soon I quit I felt my body going up in energy! and then it went down a week later.
Now, you want solutions and I am going to tell you what I am doing...
1. Quit thinking about the things that make you sad, raplace those ideas very fast. Yopur body will fallow your thongs specially because it is already used to feel bad.
2. It takes time for your body to eliminate the chemistry that doesn't work. It is just like exercicing, after a while you just can't stop.
3. Remember that your body learn, you have something called Endorphines, those are hormons that react by pleasure. If you feel bad you will create endorphines and your body will want more. You will have actually to desintoxicate. There are other hormones involved in to that and all of them manage your way of thinking.
4. Read Deepak Chopra books or Brian Wise or any spiritual enhancing book.
The main thing is that your internal energy is very low and your body is taking control of your mind. You need to increase your moral, that mean your spirit!
1. Remember your achivements
2. Put goals in your live and work on them
3. Isolate yourslef from other opinion, enjoy yourself.
4. Get busy during the day, work out, spend time in you.
5. Be humble to yourself, never pretend, keep a low profile, do not abuse of you.
6. Surrender to God. At night and several times a day say: Got, I surrender to you. Put your problems in his hands.
7. Do not push your self on anything.
8. Crate goals based on your self, not on others.
10. Eat! and eat 3 times a day, that would be better if you are exercising. Do not eat fast food. Eat rice and things cooked in your house. Drink coffe in the morning, that helps, but just one cup.
11. Replace thoughts, dream big and dream you succeding and achieving.
Just think about this: What Steve Jobs may have in his mind during the entire day? He is successful because he thinks successfully.
12. and may be the most important: you are not alone, friends are hidding every where.
Be brave, do what you know you have to do. If you feel like going to the doctor then go, have the experience but we still a big deal to go in our lives, we are learning as when we were kids and then teenagesr and then young adults and so on, we are learning all the time.
Give you time and do not rush... but keep moving.
Well, it sounds like others are going to give you good advice. But I highly recommend the following site for a quick laugh:
No but seriously you wrote sincere mail there mymemory.
I for myself had a hard time during the last year. I left Paris where I had been living for 5 years and lost my girlfriend in doing so. I also lost a lot of friends but it was the thing I felt I had to to. Life goes on, feelings fade.
I did everything to get myself going again.
Exercise, saw a therapeut for 2 months, went out, worked during day time, tried to sleep 8 hours per night. No more no less. I read some spiritual books spend time with friends. Life is truly beautiful even if it can be a bitch sometimes.
Just my 2 cents
Return to yourself - Know yourself - how can you help yourself if you do not know who you are. We are all individuals and while we can have connections and attachments in life they should not be who we are they should compliment us. Take time and learn about who you are and what you want -it is not about being selfish, but finding the self and being able to connect to it and grow as a person.
Philosophic blob over...
Hope you feel better, but as was said before if you have had an issue for so long and it is evident that you can not handle this or conquer these demons on your own then seek help from a professional.
Just to add weight to what the others have said... 2 years is a different experience than the occasional blahs. If you are really concerned, you should see a professional for evaluation.
I found that reading about others helped me to understand myself and to realize that I was not alone.
The Noonday Demon - Andrew Solomon
Unholy Ghost - Nell Casey
An Unquiet Mind - Kay R. Jamison
Prozac Nation - Elizabeth Wurtzel
Girl Interrupted - Susanna Kaysen
Darkness Visible - William Styron
These would get you started...
Anybody else have reading suggestions?
I would be interested...
If it has been going on for two years, others are right. You should see your doctor.
That being said, if you can pay for the visits and any drugs that are prescribed out of your own pocket if possible. In the states the medical databases that insurance companies keep can hurt you in the future for certain jobs and insurance.
Effexor XR, Effexor XR
75 mg. of this Rx product will help you. It takes about a week or more
to kick in but it will help you. It will help you deal with disappointment,
deal with depression......has none of the side effects of Prozac or Zoloft.
See the doctor and you will feel much better any other remedy than
stuffing your face with icecream,potato chips etc. I suggest you get
a gym membership too and work out on the eliptical trainer and
Remember........suicide is the ultimate expression of self piety.
1. St. John's Wart. This is natural, and if it doesn't help, at least it won't hurt. Real drugs make me paranoid.
2. Mix up your daily routine, and force yourself to indulge in things more often. (No, not drugs) This includes spending a much time as possible with people.
3. Strongbad will always put a smile on your face!
In case repetition will help:
See a doctor and/or a shrink. I'd recommend the shrink first, since, if the cause is not medical, it's always better to fix the core emotional cause than it is to take drugs to numb you. That said, if the cause is medical, drugs can be wonderful - but, again, only if they're curing an actual imbalance, not if they're masking an emotional, non-medical issue.
Aside from that, I recommend exercise. Sort of a do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do thing, as I'm sitting here on my butt on my way to burning about 300 calories today (typing isn't too strenuous), but, when you're depressed, it is the single best solution I've found. You are not only distracted, but you become focused on something besides your depression, and you get into better shape, which is always helpful. You can exercise for free. It's not a drug. It doesn't mess you up. And it works. It's best to have goals with it, though ("I want to be able to do x minutes on the treadmill at a certain speed", "I want to be able to lift y pounds", etc.). Just don't make weight-oriented goals (body weight, not lifting weight), since it takes time to lose weight - if you even want or need to - and that can be discouraging. Simple, easy-but-not-too-easy to achieve goals.
Also, get out. Even if you are alone, go to the movies, go to the park, go to the beach if you can. Go to church if you're religious. Just be around people. Isolation is, in and of itself, depressing.
Keep us informed about how you're doing.
Monkeybat... we have not heard back from you in this thread. We would like to know how you are doing.
Also, a little more information about what might be causing your depression (if you know). I know in many cases you can't actually pinpoint anything. But any interaction would help.
You have gotten some good advice here, I hope you have checked back and gotten it.
a song in my heart equals a smile on my face
cheesy i know, but music is empowering to me personally
however, i agree that you should go see someone and talk about this since it has been going on so long. It might just be that you are stuck in a routine or something, you didnt give us much info, so as others have suggested change the way you order your day, ect,ect...
good luck and feel better
Everyone has periods of depression in their life. But if I remember rightly, anything lasting longer than 2-4 weeks (especially if it doesn't seem to be situationally triggered) is most likely clinical depression. Two years....that's not a good sign. You should probably look into seeing a doctor.
mymemory has a good point about the helpfulness of a spiritual (if not directly religious) outlook. Exercise is also a good tip; studies are finding that it's one of the most natural ways to relieve depression.
I don't know what to tell you....any more than I knew what to say to my roommate when she went through a year of clinical depression (suicidal thoughts and all). But she said it helped just to have someone to listen....If you can't get hold of a doctor, at least find someone (or several someones) you can talk to. Preferably someone who will really listen, instead of trying to judge or "fix" you. Sometimes I find I can work out my own thoughts more easily in conversation.
A depressed person is not capable of truly believing that things will get better, and that they're not alone....despite all rational evidence to the contrary. But it's true: Things will get better, and you're not alone. It might sound cheesy, but there you go.
Go bungee jumping or skydiving. Sensory overload dude.
Most righteous rush.
Can snap you out of a funk.
It's not an option for everybody
But I just look at or think about my daughter...
i've had problems with clinical depression for much of my life. i've just gone into official recovery in the past month or so.
For me, it involved being more active, cutting back on recreational drugs, eating better, exercising, and giving up caffeine. The former are things you may already do, but i would definitely suggest giving up caffeine. I've found that the use of stimulants makes depression worse, in the end. After a week or two of withdrawl, i feel a lot better now.
It's such an individual thing, it depends on every factor in your life. But if your depression is a result of biochemicals, you should definitely look at medication therapy. While not for everyone, the right prescription brings a world of relief to many people. Unfortunately, you may have to try a dozen drugs (for a few weeks, at least, each) before you find the right one.
If it's depression caused by your thought processes and situation in life, talk therapy is a helpful tool. But you know that.
I do hope you find a road to recovery from depression, it's such an overwhelming disease. But after going into recovery, all of the work i've put into it has paid off.
Wow, two years. I'd talk to a doctor and maybe a counselor. But I'd be biased against taking drugs, particularly long-term.
I was depressed one time and found that changing jobs helped a lot.
I was depressed another time and found that ending an unhealthy relationship helped a lot.
Now I have things I do to try to stay positively focused.
The best is dancing. I like social dancing (swing, tango, salsa, ballroom and latin dancing, with a partner and steps) because it has a structure and there's less of the "club scene" around it. Dancing really energizes your brain because it's so complex -- you have to attend to music, move gracefully with rhythm, and attend to a partner. It's like 100% CPU utilization for your brain, at least when you're learning. It's also social and gets you out of the house, and it involves music, which is uplifting. If you're female, there is the small disadvantage that more women than men participate in dancing. If you're male, that becomes a significant advantage. Learning to dance is like learning a language; it takes sustained effort and some time before you gain confidence. The effort is absolutely worth it. I haven't really been depressed since I started dancing, which says a lot.
Music is powerful. Take some lessons, learn to play an instrument, learn to sing, join a jam session or song circle or play at open mic nights. This really helped me emerge from a protracted depression once. If you listen to a lot of music (examples include Sarah McLaughlin, the Indigo Girls, and a lot of the angst-ridden grungy nu-metal stuff) you can hear that the musician is working out depression, sadness, or angst through the vehicle of the music. This is probably better therapy for the musician than for the listener. Learning to play and sing is also a long-term investment, but worthwhile.
Exercise is crucial to your health and your mood. Find something you like to do and stay active.
Enjoy nature. Get outside and hike or row or paddle or walk on the beach. Fresh air, sunshine, the beauty of nature, and exercise all together.
Eat good food. Go to a farmer's market, buy fresh food from the people who grew it, pay a little more for organic. Avoid fast food. Personally, a good meal at an Indian or Thai restaurant sets everything right with the world.
If there is something in your life bothering you, take steps to correct it. Maybe you're in debt, a troubling job or relationship, or maybe your house is just messy and you're avoiding dealing with it -- you don't have to tolerate unhappiness or feel helpless about it. You can do something about it.
Read widely. It stimulates the mind and the imagination, gets you out of yourself.
Travel does the same.
Meet new people, and form lasting friendships with some of them. You can meet people anywhere that people congregate based on shared interests -- at the library, bookstores, ski lodges, churches, dances, discussion clubs, open mike sessions, poetry readings, political protests, the City Club or Chamber of Commerce, the Apple Store, etc.
I wish you the best of luck in overcoming your depression. There were times when I wondered if happiness was possible, and now I feel pretty positive about life. I hope the same for you!
Serously if you feel down all the time, see a doctor.
Couple of years ago my teacher took me to see the school nures as to why I was spelling so many words backwards, one thing lead to another and they discovered I had dyslexia, you never know.
I second what Paul said, drop the caffeine.
I agree with Doctor Q. Whenever a person is depressed, they should go to see a doctor. It could be related to a medical problem, which needs to be ruled out first. It is very sad that you have suffered for more than two years. I hope that you will seek professional help immediately monkeybat.