What's harder? Coming out bisexual, gay or telling someone about a fetish?

Discussion in 'Politics, Religion, Social Issues' started by Liquinn, Jun 26, 2015.

  1. Liquinn Suspended

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    #1
    What's harder? Coming out bisexual, gay or telling someone about a fetish?
     
  2. iBlazed macrumors 68000

    iBlazed

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    #2
    Fetish. Telling someone you're gay doesn't expose intimate details about your sex life. Telling someone your fetish involves going into much more embarrassing detail.
     
  3. mobilehaathi macrumors G3

    mobilehaathi

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    #3
    Just give up on shame altogether, makes life easier. ;)
     
  4. mudslag macrumors regular

    mudslag

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    #4

    It's entirely subjective to each person. There is no one answer fits all.
     
  5. Micky Do macrumors 68000

    Micky Do

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    #5
    Coming out as plain old vanilla heterosexual in this a day and age when being kinky in some way or another seems to be the new norm…..
     
  6. Meister Suspended

    Meister

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    #6
    Now I am curious. Why does the OP want to tell people about his fetishes?
     
  7. Liquinn thread starter Suspended

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    #7
    I don't. I think telling someone about a fetish could be easier than coming out but it depends.
     
  8. Liquinn thread starter Suspended

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  9. Eraserhead macrumors G4

    Eraserhead

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    #9
    Why would you tell anyone other than a significant other or someone at a sex party about your fetishes
     
  10. mobilehaathi macrumors G3

    mobilehaathi

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    #10
    You know what? Where I put my pineapples is my business.
     
  11. noodlemanc macrumors regular

    noodlemanc

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    #11
    Well, it depends on what the fetish is... If it's a pretty vanilla fetish then it would be easier, but if it's something really depraved then coming out as gay would be easier I'd imagine.
     
  12. jkcerda Suspended

    jkcerda

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    #12
    Very few understand when sheep are involved
     
  13. Praxis91 macrumors regular

    Praxis91

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    #13
    How about keeping all of that stuff to yourself?
     
  14. Grey Beard, Jun 27, 2015
    Last edited: Jun 28, 2015

    Grey Beard macrumors 65816

    Grey Beard

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    #14
    How very Australian of you.

    KGB:cool:
     
  15. dec. Suspended

    dec.

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    #15
    Well at some point it's something one would like to be able to discuss with his/her (potential?) sex partner (no matter if spouse, casual love interest or plain f**k buddy (yes, some people are able to enjoy sex with a good friend, hell, some even enjoy it with a total stranger, whatever floats their boat)) and I do think that it can be quite an issue in a relationship at some point when you discover that you have some sexual interests that you are too shy to talk about with your spouse/partner/etc. . Yes, I understand that certain crowds cannot imagine anything beyond "regular intercourse", it's fine, but for those who do enjoy it a bit more experimental, it can be very tough to get over the inhibitions and address those interests, even when you're together with someone open minded.But even on a small scale within the regular household sex I think that a lot of people still are very shy about being able to say what they'd like to do. On the other hand, some sexual fantasies definitely are more fun if they stay exactly that...

    The opening question itself is unfortunate as it kind of implies two different levels of privacy. It's one thing to share your sexual orientation with others (and in general for those slightly slow people who keep on whining about "rubbing it in their face" - if gays hadn't been as open as they were over the past few decades, the current changes would not have happened, so really, no one gives a f**k if you're offended by someone who is "out", as it's in their/our interest, successfully, which must really piss some idiots off! Ha!), but sexual interests themselves are independent from that.
     
  16. noodlemanc macrumors regular

    noodlemanc

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    #16
    Da-dum Tch!
     
  17. lostngone, Jun 28, 2015
    Last edited: Jun 28, 2015

    lostngone macrumors demi-god

    lostngone

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    #17
    Depends on the fetish.
    If someone likes masks in bed or maybe likes a few toys is one thing. If someone like to dress up like and be called Adolf Hitler, beaten with rubber hoses while they recite versus from the Codex Gigas, that might be a little harder than telling someone they are bisexual.

    But then again, that is just my opinion.
     
  18. Liquinn thread starter Suspended

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    #18
    Is it me or do I accept anyone regardless of what their sexuality or fetishes are? 99% of the time so to say - maybe I'm very open minded and I don't want to be judged for mine so I don't judge others. Is it good not to judge? =)
     
  19. Ulenspiegel macrumors 68030

    Ulenspiegel

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    #19
    Nolite iudicare, ut non iudicemini.
     
  20. samiwas macrumors 65816

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    #20
    Well, it appears that some of us are a bit more social than others, and some feel the need to completely close off from others.

    To what level do people need to "keep things to themselves"? Should no one even give a hint that they are gay, talking about their boyfriend or whatever? Should I never mention my kid at work, or that my wife and I went to an awesome concert or something? Should the gay co-worker never say what he and his boyfriend did over the weekend because it might be all gay and stuff?

    Indeed. I have friends who are gay, bisexual, transexual, prudish, hyper-sexual, swingers, bland, fetishists...you name it. And I guess I'm lucky enough to have friends who are open and social about it for the most part. I, myself, am pretty open, although I don't generally discuss my own fetishes.
     
  21. ElectronGuru macrumors 65816

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    #21
    One is who you are (public) and the other is what you enjoy (private). You can buy and sell private enjoyment but being forced to see someone is usually limited to public aspects. The interesting thing about homosexuality is that it's being changed from a private aspect to a public one.
     
  22. AlliFlowers Contributor

    AlliFlowers

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    #22
    Every time I see this thread title scroll by I have to roll my eyes.

    You can't compare apples and oranges. What you are dealing with is obviously the most difficult.
     
  23. sim667 macrumors 65816

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    #23
    Because at some point you may have to explain to the supermarket checkout person why you keep buying pineapple and KY.
     

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