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Discussion in 'Community' started by LethalWolfe, Aug 28, 2005.
I read this article in the Boston Globe about a week ago. Thought that it was a good idea. Trying to find a middle ground is often very difficult. At some point the parents need to learn to give their children space.
Having became a TA at my university recently, we had to attend various meetings on what to expect as a teacher.
We were told that if a parent calls asking about grades, etc. that we can not give them any information. Personally, i think it is amazing that the university in the article is giving the parents any information.
Interesting link LethalWolfe. Amazing how times change (ie- parents having 24/7 access to their children nowadays, compared to the 70's/80's where having contact once a week was hard).
I like the term "Helicopter Parents". Hopefully they stay away from the college that I am attending.
yeah, my dad (professor) was tellign me about the grades thing. FERPA or something like that--need the student's consent to give out grades. i, as a highschool student whose grades can easily be seen by my parents anytime) think that's awesom, but of course my parents think otherwise
Heck, you don't even have to go back that far. When I started college in '97 e-mail and cell phones were still pretty fledgling in terms of being main stream.
What's ironic is that the baby-boomers have gone from rebellious youths to neurotically over protective parents.
Amazing to think that's only been 8 years. I was in college then too, and we were still doing everything manually, lining up or phoning in to register for classes, you never heard a cell phone ring in class, and while I had email, none of my professors had any reason whatsoever to have it. And then of course there was high school where the guys with the pagers were the dope dealers...
Perhaps because they personally have some idea of the depths one can sink to?
Besides, are today's HS graduates being born to Baby Boomers so much anymore? Most of this year's grads were born circa 1987. Lotta the Boomers I know are grandparents...
My brother was born in 1987, and my father's a baby boomer (born 1947 - I assume that still counts?)
But my parents were slightly older than the norm when they had him, and seeing as I'm 27 they could very well have been grandparents today.
Ya, that is rather ironic.
Yep probobly because they remember what bad things they did in there younger years. (which is sick to think about my parents doing)
I think a lot of this concern also revolves around the fact that the parents are shelling out as much as $50K a year to send their kids to college... a lot of them are taking out second mortgages (a.k.a. home equity loans) or giant college loans and putting themselves into a LOT of long-term debt. They want to make sure that they're getting their money's worth, and that their kids are not frittering away their college education.
I totally understand this, but if the children are over the age of 18, then the parent has no right to any of their students information. This kind of sucks for the parents, but makes sense in other ways.
As a student who has earned his B.A., is in his second year of masters work, and will be going for his doctorate in about a year, i understand the very high cost of college. I am not a parent, so i can not speak for them, but i think it would be fairly easy to tell if your child was screwing around at college. I can understand the parents concerns, but things like this are just crazy:
Parents like the one mentioned in the above quote need to get an reality check.
And the parent also has NO obligation to pay for their college education, either. Once you're 18, any remaining desire to take care of their kids is strictly voluntary.
If I was shelling out $40K a year or more for a really good college education, I would insist on seeing their grades. It's MY money, so I want to make sure I'm getting what I'm paying for (an education).
True, but there is no, i mean, zero legal responsibility for the student to show their grades to their parents.
My point is, the parents can pay, but they do not have the right to see their kids grades. Am i agreeing with kids that do not show their parents their grades, even when their parents are footing the bill? No. I would be wary of any kid that refused to show their parents their grades.
So badger your child for their grades, not the university. University's are there to educate, not baby sit, not spy, educate. I feel sorry for these institutions. The same @sshole parents that turn violent at little league games and ran rough shod over k-12 teachers have now "graduated" to collegiate levels. The "me generation" at it's best, "Everyone should give my child what I think my child deserves. And if my child does not get an "A" in chemistry or a starting spot on the team it is obviously someone else's fault, and certainly not my child's, because I know my child deserves those things irregardless of my child's actual performance."
Unfortunately, I agree. If the parents are paying for the education of the child, I'd hope that the parents would be allowed to see their children's grades. If their children refuse, they can refuse paying for Uni. I would also be wary of any child who refuses to show their parents their grades. If the grades were good, they probably wouldn't mind so much.
I also wonder why people spend $50k a year on their child's Uni education so that they can go to Princeton and graduate in Slovak Studies with a minor in Russian Literature or something. Its not even an investment anymore, because the child isn't going to earn a high enough salary later on to justify such an expense right now. And if it's an investment......it's a bad investment. I don't want to cap what a parent should spend on educating a child, but it gets to the point where the cost is ridiculous, particularly in the US.