Would you ever date a girl you're going to be sharing a house with at college/uni?

ethical

macrumors 68000
Original poster
Dec 22, 2007
1,661
1
Situation: You and this girl are friends, and you both really like each other. You flirt a lot when you go out, but nothing comes of it because you know that in September you're going to be in the same house together with 6 other people, for a year. If you do go out, and break up, it could be very awkward still having to live in the same house. But...then you remind yourself how great she is and how much you like her....so a part of you thinks it could work anyway.
 

bamaworks

macrumors 6502
Nov 9, 2007
391
1
Lexington, KY
Situation: You and this girl are friends, and you both really like each other. You flirt a lot when you go out, but nothing comes of it because you know that in September you're going to be in the same house together with 6 other people, for a year. If you do go out, and break up, it could be very awkward still having to live in the same house. But...then you remind yourself how great she is and how much you like her....so a part of you thinks it could work anyway.
In short, yes.
 

bamaworks

macrumors 6502
Nov 9, 2007
391
1
Lexington, KY
This is how me and my girlfriend of 3.5 years met. :)
This is how me and my wife met. Living together teaches you things about a person you can't learn any other way. Sounds like you're young with all kinds of time to make mistakes (if this happened to become one). Don't live your life wondering what might have been. Find out.
 

stridemat

Moderator
Staff member
Apr 2, 2008
11,201
629
UK
This is how me and my wife met. Living together teaches you things about a person you can't learn any other way. Sounds like you're young with all kinds of time to make mistakes (if this happened to become one). Don't live your life wondering what might have been. Find out.
Exactly, I learnt to love this girl while living with her, this has helped our relationship in the long run. I hope she would say the same thing.

After graduation this year we plan to move into our own house.
 

bamaworks

macrumors 6502
Nov 9, 2007
391
1
Lexington, KY
Exactly, I learnt to love this girl while living with her, this has helped our relationship in the long run. I hope she would say the same thing.

After graduation this year we plan to move into our own house.
Welcome to my life story. We lived together in college with a few other friends over the course of four years, graduated and moved into a house together, I proposed, the rest is history.
 

longball11

macrumors 6502a
Feb 3, 2009
656
0
I don't know about ya'll but im a senior in college. Freshmen year, my first roommate was cool (didn't drink or do drugs) had a girlfriend of 4 years. They were like obsessed with each other. They visited each other every day and night. Then sophomore year I got sick and tired of them being around each other ALL THE TIME. She slept in my dorm room in his bed (with him) every night.
I requested to move to another room. I eventually got my request. Later, I found he and his gf broke up. I was actually shocked.
I then move into my first apt last summer for senior. My roommate took total advantage me by getting their first to get the biggest room, etc. Then I find out he got a puppy and his gf is living there...............I imploded (cant see my anger). Now with just 2 weeks of college left for me. The girlfriend is gone (broke up) and there was an additional dog and cat added to the family that were gone as well.
I've never had a gf but I always have a girl around me....that I wasn't interested in.
 

dukebound85

macrumors P6
Jul 17, 2005
18,155
1,501
5045 feet above sea level
6 people in a house? wow

here in Fort Collins, we have an ordinance that no more than 3 unrelated can live in same place due to the college kids having say 6 people live at a house lol

with that said, i would have NO issue with it
 

0098386

Suspended
Jan 18, 2005
21,574
2,909
Think that could be awkward? Try dating the only gamer/geek girl in the area whilst she lives in a student house with 2 other lads who declare their undying love for her causing an almighty torrent of uncomfortablenessism.
Personally I wouldn't do it. I'm all for a simpler life.
 

Tomorrow

macrumors 604
Mar 2, 2008
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Always a day away
This is one of those times where the answer seems so obvious, you wonder why someone bothered to ask it - then something tickles your brain into thinking, Hey, is this a trick question?
 

Abstract

macrumors Penryn
Dec 27, 2002
24,415
124
Location Location Location
If you want a less risky option, then I think you should start a relationship with this girl only after moving in together. Get a feel for whether you two would drive each other nuts being I. such close proximity every day. If you think the living situation may actually drive you two apart (sometimes this happens to friends as well), then I guess you shouldn't date.

Personally, I'd rather date soon and take whatever comes my way in the future. Even if it ends in failure, there's no official rule that says you can't make mistakes in life. ;)
 

dmr727

macrumors G3
Dec 29, 2007
8,634
46
NYC
Personally, I'd rather date soon and take whatever comes my way in the future. Even if it ends in failure, there's no official rule that says you can't make mistakes in life. ;)
I agree with this. Now is the time make these kinds of mistakes anyway, and who knows - it might turn out just fine.
 

ethical

macrumors 68000
Original poster
Dec 22, 2007
1,661
1
6 people in a house? wow

here in Fort Collins, we have an ordinance that no more than 3 unrelated can live in same place due to the college kids having say 6 people live at a house lol

with that said, i would have NO issue with it
Actually, there's 8 of us :p Me, her and 6 others.

Too bad it's the only place to live. That must be a really small town. :rolleyes:
It's funny when people make sarcastic comments, and don't understand the whole situation. Makes them seem like bit of a plonker...... we've already signed the contracts and paid the deposit.

This is one of those times where the answer seems so obvious, you wonder why someone bothered to ask it - then something tickles your brain into thinking, Hey, is this a trick question?
I was after opinions not answers, most people on here seem to have been able to manage that ;) Thanks for playing though.

If you want a less risky option, then I think you should start a relationship with this girl only after moving in together. Get a feel for whether you two would drive each other nuts being I. such close proximity every day. If you think the living situation may actually drive you two apart (sometimes this happens to friends as well), then I guess you shouldn't date.
Not saying the living conditions specifically might drive us apart, people break up for all sorts of reasons. My last relationship had a very clean ending actually, we stayed friends.... but there is always the risk that it could be a messy break up, making things awkward. But, a lot of you guys are saying we're young so should risk it anyway, which I like the sound of :D
 

Tomorrow

macrumors 604
Mar 2, 2008
7,154
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Always a day away
I was after opinions not answers, most people on here seem to have been able to manage that ;) Thanks for playing though.
Oh, I'm terribly sorry to have misinterpreted that little round squiggly marker at the end of the sentence which represents the title of this thread, which you yourself created. :rolleyes: Although, far be it from me to just follow along with what OTHER people are doing, and address a ****ing question when it's asked. What the hell was I thinking?

You can come down from your high horse now.
 

GoCubsGo

macrumors Nehalem
Feb 19, 2005
35,741
146
Has anyone said "don't **** where you eat" yet? If not then there you have it.
 

-aggie-

macrumors P6
Jun 19, 2009
16,795
50
Where bunnies are welcome.
You can come down from your high horse now.
Can he? What if this girl he is friends with is already off the horse? Should he wait until she leaves? Or is the ground now sacred and he must stay on the horse forever? What if he gets off the horse and falls on the girl? Will she get pregnant?

Come on, Tomorrow, we'll need another thread before he can come off this horse. There are complex questions to answer.
 

ethical

macrumors 68000
Original poster
Dec 22, 2007
1,661
1
Oh, I'm terribly sorry to have misinterpreted that little round squiggly marker at the end of the sentence which represents the title of this thread, which you yourself created. :rolleyes: Although, far be it from me to just follow along with what OTHER people are doing, and address a ****ing question when it's asked. What the hell was I thinking?

You can come down from your high horse now.
Wow, who pissed in your Cheerios this morning?
You didn't follow along though did you? Your comment wasn't helpful.... in fact it wasn't even relevant. If it's so obvious then why have people been on both sides of the fence. Some saying go for it, it could be worth the risk...others saying don't do it. That's why I wanted opinions. Have people been in this situation before? What would you do if you were in this situation?

Can he? What if this girl he is friends with is already off the horse? Should he wait until she leaves? Or is the ground now sacred and he must stay on the horse forever? What if he gets off the horse and falls on the girl? Will she get pregnant?

Come on, Tomorrow, we'll need another thread before he can come off this horse. There are complex questions to answer.
Seriously? If you think it's so trivial and stupid then don't bother posting. One guy has already said a relationship of over 3 years started this way...and another married the girl.
I think you need to get off the horse, and stop thinking your 'grown-up' life is the only sort of life with issues, and that anything younger is juvenile and foolish.
 

-aggie-

macrumors P6
Jun 19, 2009
16,795
50
Where bunnies are welcome.
Wow, who pissed in your Cheerios this morning?
You didn't follow along though did you? Your comment wasn't helpful.... in fact it wasn't even relevant. If it's so obvious then why have people been on both sides of the fence. Some saying go for it, it could be worth the risk...others saying don't do it. That's why I wanted opinions. Have people been in this situation before? What would you do if you were in this situation?


Seriously? If you think it's so trivial and stupid then don't bother posting. One guy has already said a relationship of over 3 years started this way...and another married the girl.
I think you need to get off the horse, and stop thinking your 'grown-up' life is the only sort of life with issues, and that anything younger is juvenile and foolish.
You miss the point entirely. I'm trying to tell you that you're being too serious. If us "older" people could do things over, we'd make sure we enjoyed things more, but life happens, and at the time it's hard to know or think that. I'm certainly not implying your troubles are trivial. You have a chance to maybe be with your soulmate, but you're over-thinking everything, much like an "older" person might do. Act young, be young. Ride the bike, fall off the bike. Learn from mistakes, but take chances.
 

Tomorrow

macrumors 604
Mar 2, 2008
7,154
1,324
Always a day away
You didn't follow along though did you?
I pay much closer attention than I'm sure you realize. But that's okay.

Your comment wasn't helpful.... in fact it wasn't even relevant.
Sorry it was lost on you. If you really feel like something is unhelpful and irrelevant, then you could save some effort by ignoring it instead of trying to start a pissing match over it. But again, I'll chalk it up to inexperience on your part; that's still okay.

Seriously? If you think it's so trivial and stupid then don't bother posting.
Pot, meet kettle.

I think you need to get off the horse, and stop thinking your 'grown-up' life is the only sort of life with issues, and that anything younger is juvenile and foolish.
I think if you'd bother to listen to those who've been where you are now, you might just get the knowledge you seek. I remember being in my 20's, and I'm sure -aggie- does, too. But he can speak for himself here:

You miss the point entirely. I'm trying to tell you that you're being too serious. If us "older" people could do things over, we'd make sure we enjoyed things more, but life happens, and at the time it's hard to know or think that. I'm certainly not implying your troubles are trivial. You have a chance to maybe be with your soulmate, but you're over-thinking everything, much like an "older" person might do. Act young, be young. Ride the bike, fall off the bike. Learn from mistakes, but take chances.
QFT. Well said.
 
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