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greatdevourer
Mar 21, 2006, 09:59 AM
/* Source Code Windows 2000 */

#include "win31.h"
#include "win95.h"
#include "win98.h"
#include "workst~1.h"
#include "evenmore.h"
#include "oldstuff.h"
#include "billrulz.h"
#include "monopoly.h"
#include "backdoor.h"
#define INSTALL = HARD

char make_prog_look_big(16000000);
void main()
{
while(!CRASHED)
{
display_copyright_message();
display_bill_rules_message();
do_nothing_loop();

if (first_time_installation)
{
make_100_megabyte_swapfile();
do_nothing_loop();
totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();
search_and_destroy_the_rest_of-OS2();
make_futile_attempt_to_damage_Linux();
disable_Netscape();
disable_RealPlayer();
disable_Lotus_Products();
hang_system();
} //if
write_something(anything);
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
do_some_stuff();

if (still_not_crashed)
{
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
basically_run_windows_31();
do_nothing_loop();
} // if
} //while

if (detect_cache())
disable_cache();

if (fast_cpu())
{
set_wait_states(lots);
set_mouse(speed,very_slow);
set_mouse(action,jumpy);
set_mouse(reaction,sometimes);
} //if

/* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.1"); */
/* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11"); */
/* printf("Welcome to Windows 95"); */
/* printf("Welcome to Windows NT 3.0"); */
/* printf("Welcome to Windows 98"); */
/* printf("Welcome to Windows NT 4.0"); */
printf("Welcome to Windows 2000");

if (system_ok())
crash(to_dos_prompt)
else
system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp",O_CREATE);

while(something)
{
sleep(5);
get_user_input();
sleep(5);
act_on_user_input();
sleep(5);
} // while
create_general_protection_fault();

} // main

:D



odedia
Mar 21, 2006, 10:35 AM
Excellent :)

liketom
Mar 21, 2006, 10:38 AM
so true , so funny


:D

Josh
Mar 21, 2006, 11:30 AM
OS X Source Code

#include <update>
#include <graphics>

int main()
{ float their_price,our_price;
float their_performance,our_performance;

if(their_price < ourprice && their_performance > our_performance)
{ while(reality_distortion())
{ pretty_graphics();
update_frequently();
make_new_obsolete();
force_upgrade();
}

return 0;
}

bool reality_distortion()
{ string lies,lies2,lies3;
bool customer_tricked;

while(lies || lies2 || lies3)
customer_tricked = true;

return true;
}

jtalerico
Mar 21, 2006, 12:44 PM
OS X Source Code

#include <update>
#include <graphics>

int main()
{ float their_price,our_price;
float their_performance,our_performance;

if(their_price < ourprice && their_performance > our_performance)
{ while(reality_distortion())
{ pretty_graphics();
update_frequently();
make_new_obsolete();
force_upgrade();
}

return 0;
}

bool reality_distortion()
{ string lies,lies2,lies3;
bool customer_tricked;

while(lies || lies2 || lies3)
customer_tricked = true;

return true;
}



Nice :)

HiRez
Mar 21, 2006, 03:57 PM
Hehe...funny!

But hey, who says Macs can't run Windoze software?- (void)runWindowsSimulation {
[crashView lockFocus];
[[NSColor blueColor] set];
NSRectFill([crashView bounds]);
[crashView unlockFocus];

[crashTextField setTextColor:[NSColor whiteColor]];
[crashTextField setStringValue:@"A fatal exception 0E has occurred at 0292:DBAA4C16. The current application will be terminated."];

BOOL done = NO;
while (!done) {
[self release];
}
}

Benjamin
Mar 21, 2006, 03:59 PM
oh yeah, thats been around a few times. I remember seeing basically that when the win2k source code was leaked and it was on /., its funny alright.