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204467
Aug 23, 2008, 05:15 PM
I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad if they haven't lost it yet, I'm simply curious. Please also say whether you're male or female; I want to know if there's a significant difference between the two demographics. And please, keep responses civil and clean, I don't want any smut in this thread.

I'm 16, but I lost it at 15. I'm a male.

tecknical
Aug 23, 2008, 05:36 PM
kinda awkward question...i'm male and it happened a little after my 17th birthday

Gray-Wolf
Aug 23, 2008, 05:37 PM
I don't think that this is an appropriate topic here.

dukebound85
Aug 23, 2008, 05:38 PM
why does it matter?

who would benefit from knowing?

why ask really personal questions?

thechidz
Aug 23, 2008, 05:41 PM
:rolleyes:agreed... this is not the place to discuss these issues. It cool that this site has a wide age range but some topics deserve a private chat room... so I reported the thread sorry. besides, when you grow up you'll realize it isn't as big a deal as when you found out santa clause doesn't exist

204467
Aug 23, 2008, 05:44 PM
I've seen strange topics on this forum before, like the shaving thread and to what music did you lose your virginity. I didn't really see a difference. And for those interested, I just thought it was an interesting topic, that would probably be answered truthfully, due to the anonymity of the internet.

leekohler
Aug 23, 2008, 05:45 PM
17- who cares anyway?

Lau
Aug 23, 2008, 05:49 PM
I've seen strange topics on this forum before, like the shaving thread and to what music did you lose your virginity. I didn't really see a difference.

No, quite right no one's forced to answer and it's hardly the most racy of subjects. I don't see the outrage by the above posters myself...

204467
Aug 23, 2008, 05:50 PM
17- who cares anyway?

Sex and the mindset of sex interests me; that's why I was so pissed when I kept missing the VH1 sex mini-series. However, I have to ask; if you don't know who cares, then why did you respond? :rolleyes:

204467
Aug 23, 2008, 05:53 PM
No, quite right no one's forced to answer and it's hardly the most racy of subjects. I don't see the outrage by the above posters myself...

Hey, thanks for the support. I though I had crossed a major line there; maybe the first posters were just a little more conservative than I.

However, I can't help but notice that you didn't answer the question...;)

rdowns
Aug 23, 2008, 05:56 PM
I don't see anything wrong with this thread given we've had a thread on a MacBook Pro damaged by female juices recently. :D

I lost mine in 8th grade. I guess I was 15.

cleanup
Aug 23, 2008, 06:02 PM
Senior highschool year, age 17.

Iscariot
Aug 23, 2008, 06:06 PM
I was born in a small town, and I grew up in an only slightly larger town, so there was certainly a bit of a conservative trend, and the first couple of girls I dated were very much catholic. I lost my virginity literally the first time I got out of that bubble on my own. I think I was eighteen.

204467
Aug 23, 2008, 06:08 PM
I don't see anything wrong with this thread given we've had a thread on a MacBook Pro damaged by female juices recently. :D

I lost mine in 8th grade. I guess I was 15.

NY school system confuses me sometimes, coming from Philly. I didn't turn 15 until 9th grade, I don't understand how you were 15 in 8th (unless you got held back?). Then again, if it's something personal, you don't have to tell me.

BTW: MBP damaged by female juices? Do you have a link to that thread? That is far too intriguing of a topic not to get further information.

iJohnHenry
Aug 23, 2008, 06:08 PM
A closed poll might be more acceptable to the more "sensitive" members present??

kixsand
Aug 23, 2008, 06:09 PM
You should also be asking how large the community was in which the person grew up...single biggest factor in my opinion. The bigger the city the longer they wait.

My town only had 3000 people and I was one of the ugly ones...so I had to wait till I was 14 to get busy.

:-)

LeahM
Aug 23, 2008, 06:15 PM
If you really want answers, I would suggest a poll, then the conservative members would more likely respond

cleanup
Aug 23, 2008, 06:16 PM
You should also be asking how large the community was in which the person grew up...single biggest factor in my opinion. The bigger the city the longer they wait.

My town only had 3000 people and I was one of the ugly ones...so I had to wait till I was 14 to get busy.

:-)

So you're saying the good looking of those 3000 people were getting down at age 11? 12? It's not unheard of, but if you're one of the ugliest (and by your conjecture, one of the latest to lose their virginity), then that's one peculiar town, to say the least.

Melrose
Aug 23, 2008, 06:46 PM
I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad if they haven't lost it yet....

First of all, it's nobody's business whether I am or not.

secondly, if you are, be proud of the fact you've hung onto it and will make the first time with the right woman (eg: your wife and best friend.. and by saying that I'm not pre-judging those that have given theirs up) special. Virginity isn't something to be ashamed of.

I resent the phrasing of that remark.

iJohnHenry
Aug 23, 2008, 06:53 PM
There is a flourishing business, plastic surgeons "repairing" the hymen.

So much for honesty in a relationship.

bigandy
Aug 23, 2008, 06:54 PM
It was about 6:30 on a Wednesday afternoon.

rdowns
Aug 23, 2008, 07:00 PM
It was about 6:30 on a Wednesday afternoon.

It was over at 6:31 on said Wednesday. :D

bigandy
Aug 23, 2008, 07:01 PM
It was over at 6:31 on said Wednesday. :D

If only you'd managed to last a little longer, I might have been somewhat satisfied.

:p

redwarrior
Aug 23, 2008, 07:02 PM
It was over at 6:31 on said Wednesday. :D
No inside info allowed.:eek: Someone slap me, I'm getting out of line again.:o

Dang, bigandy beat me to it.

dukebound85
Aug 23, 2008, 07:03 PM
First of all, it's nobody's business whether I am or not.

secondly, if you are, be proud of the fact you've hung onto it and will make the first time with the right woman (eg: your wife and best friend.. and by saying that I'm not pre-judging those that have given theirs up) special. Virginity isn't something to be ashamed of.

I resent the phrasing of that remark.

the op probably thinks hes "cool" since he lost it at 15 when he was a child and wants to tell everyone how much of a "man" he is lol

personally, i believe if you dont have the means to support any consequences of your decisions, you shouldnt be engaging in the practice

bigandy
Aug 23, 2008, 07:04 PM
No inside info allowed.:eek: Someone slap me, I'm getting out of line again.:o

Dang, bigandy beat me to it.

Still, I'm not as 'fast' as rdowns :p

Melrose
Aug 23, 2008, 07:05 PM
perrsonally, i believe if you dont have the means to support any consequences of your decisions, you shouldnt be engaging in the practice

I would have to agree with you. Well said.

Xander562
Aug 23, 2008, 07:06 PM
Aren't these questions getting a bit personal?

skunk
Aug 23, 2008, 07:06 PM
Bloody ages ago.

skunk
Aug 23, 2008, 07:08 PM
Aren't these questions getting a bit personal?You don't have to answer.

TuffLuffJimmy
Aug 23, 2008, 07:08 PM
Well I lost my virginity to a boy at the age of 17... I guess I'll never do it with a girl now. Which I don't know what to feel about that since I wanted to do that at least once, just to feel the water.

204467
Aug 23, 2008, 07:09 PM
If you really want answers, I would suggest a poll, then the conservative members would more likely respond

Yeah, but that doesn't show gender, which is one of the big things I'm interested in.

First of all, it's nobody's business whether I am or not.

secondly, if you are, be proud of the fact you've hung onto it and will make the first time with the right woman (eg: your wife and best friend.. and by saying that I'm not pre-judging those that have given theirs up) special. Virginity isn't something to be ashamed of.

I resent the phrasing of that remark.

Sorry about the phrasing, I didn't mean anything by it. I know some people put first-time sex on a big pedestal and I don't agree with that. I'm not afraid to admit it, the first time I got any, I didn't last very long at all (though she still got off; I've got hands for a very good reason ;)). However, once I lost it, I didn't feel any different (except maybe tired; ha ha ha). Besides, I was glad I waited, because I still can't think of a better woman I would have wanted to lose it to than the one I did. Of course, that opinion might change if we break up, but that's not a definite thing that I'm not going to worry about.

Anyway, I didn't mean to offend anyone, though I just have to bring logic into this; if you don't think it's anybody's business if/when you lost it, why exactly did you reply to this topic? Just to tell me off? I don't even know why you would bother, then.

Lau
Aug 23, 2008, 07:09 PM
personally, i believe if you dont have the means to support any consequences of your decisions, you shouldnt be engaging in the practice

Presumably people who believe this also don't drive, as the consequences of a 'mistake' driving is arguably far worse than a 'mistake' during sex. I imagine it's more likely as well.

BoyBach
Aug 23, 2008, 07:11 PM
131467

Honest.

dukebound85
Aug 23, 2008, 07:14 PM
Presumably people who believe this also don't drive, as the consequences of a 'mistake' driving is arguably far worse than a 'mistake' during sex. I imagine it's more likely as well.

well i pay car insurance for that reason.

are you advocating for 15 year olds to get pregnant or something?

i dont see how my view is out of line in the least......if anything it benefits all parties involved

TuffLuffJimmy
Aug 23, 2008, 07:20 PM
well i pay car insurance for that reason.

are you advocating for 15 year olds to get pregnant or something?

i dont see how my view is out of line in the least......if anything it benefits all parties involved

That's not the point of this thread. If you want to argue about that take it somewhere else. You're going to get this thread locked by a moderator and wasteland'd if you don't stop this argument.

Lau
Aug 23, 2008, 07:26 PM
well i pay car insurance for that reason.


I'm sure an insurance payout would be of great comfort to the person who dies in a hideous car crash.

Of course I'm not advocating anyone (of any age) get pregnant by mistake, but there are a hell of a lot of ways to make it as close as risk free as it gets. Far more so than many of the things we do every day, such as driving. The idea that people are denying themselves one of life's great pleasures because they've been educated to fear everything to do with sex is just kind of saddening, really, when far more things people do every single day are far more risky.

nick9191
Aug 23, 2008, 07:28 PM
Well I lost my virginity to a boy at the age of 17... I guess I'll never do it with a girl now. Which I don't know what to feel about that since I wanted to do that at least once, just to feel the water.
Give it a go. Girl secks rox :p

Then again so may boy secks, however I don't really fancy that.

204467
Aug 23, 2008, 07:29 PM
the op probably thinks hes "cool" since he lost it at 15 when he was a child and wants to tell everyone how much of a "man" he is lol

personally, i believe if you dont have the means to support any consequences of your decisions, you shouldnt be engaging in the practice

No, I don't think I'm "cool" because I lost it then; in fact, I didn't tell anyone about it until I was directly asked about it. And even then, I wasn't bragging, I basically went "Yeah, [girlfriend's name] and I had sex about a week ago. Can I change the subject now?" (though a friend of mine heard the news and hugged me upon hearing it, which still makes me laugh).

As to your second point, I have never gotten my girlfriend pregnant, we always use condoms (spermicidal too, just for extra protection) and since we were both virgins, neither of us has any STD's. Also, by your reasoning, that means poor people shouldn't have sex, since a condom could break and they would have trouble affording an abortion (or however they would take care of it).

Anyway, that's just my thoughts. Oh, and if your remark was sarcastic, sorry; I really hate the word lol. Much prefer emoticons; plus, for some reason, "lol" and people who say it a lot (especially in real life) piss me off. Anyone agree with me?

Sorry for the long post, hope I didn't put you to sleep while you read it.

That's not the point of this thread. If you want to argue about that take it somewhere else. You're going to get this thread locked by a moderator and wasteland'd if you don't stop this argument.

Thank you! Do not argue, forum fights suck, I had enough of that $h!t in the piracy thread (which thankfully has died down. Hmm, is a resurrection needed? ;)). I'd like this thread to remain open, I'm interested in the responses from a purely clinical/scientific standpoint, I don't want any arguments.

Hawkeye411
Aug 23, 2008, 07:37 PM
Can't remember that far back.

iJohnHenry
Aug 23, 2008, 07:42 PM
Well I lost my virginity to a boy at the age of 17... I guess I'll never do it with a girl now. Which I don't know what to feel about that since I wanted to do that at least once, just to feel the water.

Such a shame.

You should not let the libido of your aggressive (?) partner define your life.

Not to disrespect the Gay members of this community, but sex with the opposite gender is something to be treasured. Not just a "release" of sexual urges. But something more.

TuffLuffJimmy
Aug 23, 2008, 07:48 PM
Such a shame.

You should not let the libido of your aggressive (?) partner define your life.

Not to disrespect the Gay members of this community, but sex with the opposite gender is something to be treasured. Not just a "release" of sexual urges. But something more.

Well my partner and I aren't really together anymore. It's more of: at one time I thought I had an interest in girls, but I have found that I really don't. As much as I believe for 'most' people that sex with the opposite sex is something to be treasured, personally I feel like I would feel dirty afterwards, because of course I would have been lying to myself and my partner.

Sex with the same sex can also be a treasure ;)

bigandy
Aug 23, 2008, 07:48 PM
Not to disrespect the Gay members of this community, but sex with the opposite gender is something to be treasured. Not just a "release" of sexual urges. But something more.

And I'm sure those members of the community would point out that for them, relations with someone of the same sex can be something to be treasured, be something more.

I don't really see how your comment can be construed as anything other than an alternative way of saying "I don't believe sex between two men, or two women, can be as 'deep' and 'treasured' as an experience between a man and a woman. But don't take any offense to that."


Not trying to start a fight, just pointing it out.

Frisco
Aug 23, 2008, 07:48 PM
26 years old and so not worth the wait.

dukebound85
Aug 23, 2008, 07:50 PM
That's not the point of this thread. If you want to argue about that take it somewhere else. You're going to get this thread locked by a moderator and wasteland'd if you don't stop this argument.

good call. its easy to get off topic on issues like this

iJohnHenry
Aug 23, 2008, 07:52 PM
Not trying to start a fight, just pointing it out.

Point taken.

Just an subjective view on sexual life, as is it today.

Rhosfelt
Aug 23, 2008, 07:58 PM
I was probably 15 as well, and when I look back on it I really wish I would have said no. She ended up cheating on me and all this other stuff.

However about two years later I ended with with another girl, and I wish I would have waited for her. Though we are not together anymore, that time was probably the best relationship wise for me. :)

So kids the moral of the story is make sure you know who your partner is, and be sure about it!

OscarTheGrouch
Aug 23, 2008, 08:02 PM
I was 14 almost 15, in a movie theater during the movie "Man Trouble"

Rhosfelt
Aug 23, 2008, 08:03 PM
I was 14 almost 15, in a movie theater during the movie "Man Trouble"

That bad of a movie?

yg17
Aug 23, 2008, 09:28 PM
With our hand or with someone else? :D

iToaster
Aug 23, 2008, 09:39 PM
With our hand or with someone else? :D

Uh, perhaps you need to look up virginity (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virginity).

yg17
Aug 23, 2008, 09:46 PM
Uh, perhaps you need to look up virginity (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virginity).

Uh, perhaps you need to look up joke (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joke). ;)

Dagless
Aug 23, 2008, 09:47 PM
I'm waiting and I'm 22. But I've always been a little conservative in myself like that, waiting till I'm engaged to the girl I want to spend the rest of my life with and such.

But for funs - first kiss at 14, first other stuff at 18.

iTeen
Aug 23, 2008, 09:53 PM
I'm 15...and I have to opportunity to lose it very soon.

But I am going to wait...I just don't think its right at this point.

:o

And I am a straight boy btw.

apsterling
Aug 23, 2008, 10:01 PM
Still Virgin, and probably will be for a while- I'm not sure whether to go by the morality of the church, standard American morality, and even so I'm not in any position to granted I have no girlfriend.

Not been kissed either. I'm 15 at the moment.

sushi
Aug 23, 2008, 10:02 PM
I was a late bloomer. Glad that I waited.

One thing about loosing your virginity, is that once you've lost it, it's gone and can never be regained. So I would offer, that when you loose it, do it with someone special for the right reasons.

tMac85
Aug 23, 2008, 10:03 PM
I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad if they haven't lost it yet, I'm simply curious. Please also say whether you're male or female; I want to know if there's a significant difference between the two demographics. And please, keep responses civil and clean, I don't want any smut in this thread.

I'm 16, but I lost it at 15. I'm a male.




im sorry, i just dont think that you at age 16, being that you probably did it once, have the need to post a thread about this, or even act like you are so knowledgeable about this subject. not that i have anything against your personal life or know you at all. but it just sounds like you are want to brag. youre 15 and you have so much ahead of you. take your time.

male

Dagless
Aug 23, 2008, 10:17 PM
Still Virgin, and probably will be for a while- I'm not sure whether to go by the morality of the church, standard American morality, and even so I'm not in any position to granted I have no girlfriend.

Go at your own pace :) Don't let anyone rush you into something you're not comfortable with. But by all means if you want it then go for it :p


One thing about loosing your virginity, is that once you've lost it, it's gone and can never be regained. So I would offer, that when you loose it, do it with someone special for the right reasons.
This is my thinkings. I wish my first kiss never happened, wrong person completely. That kind of disaster made me think that yea - once it's gone it's gone. No amount of reconstructive surgery or hypnosis can bring it back :p

iToaster
Aug 23, 2008, 10:20 PM
Uh, perhaps you need to look up joke (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joke). ;)

Ha! Got me, I've dealt with too many teenagers that don't know the difference between the two... those are always fun conversations... :rolleyes:

sushi
Aug 23, 2008, 10:28 PM
Go at your own pace :) Don't let anyone rush you into something you're not comfortable with.
Good advice.

This is my thinkings. I wish my first kiss never happened, wrong person completely. That kind of disaster made me think that yea - once it's gone it's gone. No amount of reconstructive surgery or hypnosis can bring it back :p
Kind of like your first murder. Once you do it, it's easy to do another. :p

My point is that once you cross the line, the line no longer becomes a barrier.

If I had it to do all over again, I would have been a virgin when I was married.

However, to know this, I had to loose my virginity before hand. And while I was a late bloomer, I did make up for lost time. :)

Iscariot
Aug 23, 2008, 10:34 PM
One thing about loosing your virginity, is that once you've lost it, it's gone and can never be regained. So I would offer, that when you loose it, do it with someone special for the right reasons.

This is my thinkings. I wish my first kiss never happened, wrong person completely. That kind of disaster made me think that yea - once it's gone it's gone. No amount of reconstructive surgery or hypnosis can bring it back :p

No offense to either of you (or anyone else) intended, but virginity is not something that is special by nature; it is special only if you consider it as such. I lost my virginity at the culmination of an amazing and life-changing journey, the likes of which I have never experienced in the many years since. I also lost it to the right person (they were the right person at the time) under the right circumstances in a situation that was so "magical" it could be a Hollywood movie. The story was so amazing it still touches people to this day.

Despite that, I have had sex that has been vastly more special since then, and with different people no less. The beauty of life is that special is what we make it. You can have amazing and truly touching sex with someone you've known all your life, or someone you've known for ten minutes. I certainly respect that you have both made your own decisions and I am in no way trying to tell you that you're wrong, but in this thread and in others there seems to be a sense of moral superiority from both sides of the fence. Waiting for sex isn't necessarily going to make it more special, unless that's what special means to you.

TSE
Aug 23, 2008, 11:09 PM
is it ok that im 15 and still havent lost it? :(

TuffLuffJimmy
Aug 23, 2008, 11:13 PM
is it ok that im 15 and still havent lost it? :(

It's more than okay... I wish I had waited. Sure I really liked the person that I was with, but I don't think he liked me as much as I liked him.

204467
Aug 23, 2008, 11:42 PM
With our hand or with someone else? :D

Ha! Good one!.

im sorry, i just dont think that you at age 16, being that you probably did it once, have the need to post a thread about this, or even act like you are so knowledgeable about this subject. not that i have anything against your personal life or know you at all. but it just sounds like you are want to brag. youre 15 and you have so much ahead of you. take your time.

male

Ugh... Read some of my later posts in this thread, not just the first one. I believe that I offer good reasons as to the point of this thread; reasons you mights agree with, had you taken the time to read them.

I normally don't do this, but since you kind of pissed me off, you spelled "you're" wrong; you need an apostrophe.

is it ok that im 15 and still havent lost it? :(

Of course! I don't see anything wrong with that in the slightest! Of course, don't listen to me. However, I'm sure when you meet the right person, you'll find it's right and it will be good.

adk
Aug 23, 2008, 11:51 PM
The real travesty is how long it's been since the last time I've been laid.

Abstract
Aug 24, 2008, 12:13 AM
well i pay car insurance for that reason.

are you advocating for 15 year olds to get pregnant or something?

i dont see how my view is out of line in the least......if anything it benefits all parties involved

Who cares? THAT is off topic.

If people want to discuss this, they can discuss it. The topic is in the thread's title. You should have avoided it if you had a problem with it. It's none of our business, but then again, if someone comes into this thread and posts the info, they've made it our business. Some people feel differently.


I don't really see how your comment can be construed as anything other than an alternative way of saying "I don't believe sex between two men, or two women, can be as 'deep' and 'treasured' as an experience between a man and a woman. But don't take any offense to that."


Have you only just figured that out? :p

Still, I'm not as 'fast' as rdowns :p

Who, old Quick-Draw? ;)

I was a late bloomer. Glad that I waited.

One thing about loosing your virginity, is that once you've lost it, it's gone and can never be regained. So I would offer, that when you loose it, do it with someone special for the right reasons.

Losing your virginity isn't the same as physically losing something. It's more of a mental thing, IMO. Even if it was with someone who, in hindsight, you feel was a mistake, it's not a big deal.

is it ok that im 15 and still havent lost it? :(

Of course it is. You're still VERY young. I wouldn't worry about it until you're 17 or 18. :p No no, there's no right age.


I "lost" mine when I was 18. I don't miss it, either.

ladylove
Aug 24, 2008, 12:15 AM
I was 15 and wish I waited a little longer.

dukebound85
Aug 24, 2008, 01:04 AM
That's not the point of this thread. If you want to argue about that take it somewhere else. You're going to get this thread locked by a moderator and wasteland'd if you don't stop this argument.

good call. its easy to get off topic on issues like this

Who cares? THAT is off topic.

If people want to discuss this, they can discuss it. The topic is in the thread's title. You should have avoided it if you had a problem with it. It's none of our business, but then again, if someone comes into this thread and posts the info, they've made it our business. Some people feel differently.



comeon abstract lol ive acknowledged it. just sometimes its easy to get off topic with issues like this

carry on people:)

Abstract
Aug 24, 2008, 01:09 AM
^^^ Listen, just because I replied before reading the entire thread doesn't mean I can't have my go at giving you a hard time, OK? ;)

Iscariot
Aug 24, 2008, 01:09 AM
I "lost" mine when I was 18. I don't miss it, either.
I HAVE YOUR VIRGINITY. IF YOU EVER WANT TO SEE IT ALIVE AGAIN, I REQUIRE TEN THOUSAND COLA NUTS WRAPPED IN BROWN PAPER. YOU CANNOT TRACK US. YOU CANNOT TRACE US. SINCERELY, ISCARIOT.

Abstract
Aug 24, 2008, 01:16 AM
Dear Sir/Madam,

I will send the cola nuts to your Nigerian address by tomorrow. Please do not harm my virginity. It's fragile, weeps often, and gets hungry very quickly. It has a verocious appetite for poonany, as it always cries out for more "poonany", or sometimes, "poontang". I don't know what this "poonany" is, but after seeking the advice of a linguist, it likely refers to something of Indian origin. Perhaps this should be investigated further.


Sincerely,

Abstract

sushi
Aug 24, 2008, 01:26 AM
The real travesty is how long it's been since the last time I've been laid.
Got a copy of last year's calendar? :p

Losing your virginity isn't the same as physically losing something. It's more of a mental thing, IMO.
Well, it is a physical activity with someone else, is it not?

It's also mental.

Virginity is something that is religious and culturally driven for sure. But I would also say, that it is very personal the first time.

tresbien
Aug 24, 2008, 02:10 AM
Ya wanna know what pisses me off?! The fact that guys can sleep with whomever they want to, and pretty much as early as they want to...and they'll get high-fived, and receive some "way to go!"'s. And yet, in (high)school, if poeple find out that a girl has sex with someone, she is automatically dubbed a slut, and people lose respect for her. Now, whats up with that! :mad:


anyways, I'm a virgin, and I've got no problem with waiting it out.

noaccess
Aug 24, 2008, 02:45 AM
tresbien: You know, it doesn't surprise me. Intolerance of all sorts is everywhere. But I agree, it's revolting, and it makes no sense at all.

On a related note, Sex and The City would have been *nothing* without Samantha. Awesome character. :)

EDIT: Of course, I forgot the juicy details: 18 year old, guy, virgin. SSRI antidepressants are partly to blame, and their (semi)permanent side effects. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PSSD)

Mord
Aug 24, 2008, 02:50 AM
18, wasn't until I was 19 that it got particularly physically enjoyable and that was with the same person primarily, it takes a while to work out what works for you and that's difficult when people's egos are so frail. Sex shouldn't be a race to orgasm, it's far more enjoyable when it's spanned out over hours possibly with multiple ones if you can :P

sushi
Aug 24, 2008, 02:53 AM
Ya wanna know what pisses me off?! The fact that guys can sleep with whomever they want to, and pretty much as early as they want to...and they'll get high-fived, and receive some "way to go!"'s. And yet, in (high)school, if poeple find out that a girl has sex with someone, she is automatically dubbed a slut, and people lose respect for her. Now, whats up with that! :mad:
Agree. Sad fact of life it seems.

anyways, I'm a virgin, and I've got no problem with waiting it out.
Good for you. :)

penter
Aug 24, 2008, 02:56 AM
I think that your gender and age, and all the anxiousness associated with them are fitting justification for the nature of such post.
I shouldn't even be talking, though. I'm only 18. It's not like i don't have all that built up anxiousness or curiosity.
Also, to the really conservative ones out there: chill out. If you don't wanna answer, then don't.

I lost it shortly after my 14th B-day.
At the time the idea of having lost it at 14 was awesome (still is).
The experience itself was horrible, though...

Ya wanna know what pisses me off?! The fact that guys can sleep with whomever they want to, and pretty much as early as they want to...and they'll get high-fived, and receive some "way to go!"'s. And yet, in (high)school, if poeple find out that a girl has sex with someone, she is automatically dubbed a slut, and people lose respect for her. Now, whats up with that! :mad:


anyways, I'm a virgin, and I've got no problem with waiting it out.


What you are describing is inherent of the still-largely patriarchal society that we live in. Latin countries tend to be much worse in that aspect, though, consider yourself lucky.
I've always thought about that. In a way , however, girls are at fault for this, too, because they - for most part - chose to conform to the norms of this society in fear of being dubbed as sluts, or whatnot.

motulist
Aug 24, 2008, 03:05 AM
Ya wanna know what pisses me off?! The fact that guys can sleep with whomever they want to, and pretty much as early as they want to...and they'll get high-fived, and receive some "way to go!"'s. And yet, in (high)school, if poeple find out that a girl has sex with someone, she is automatically dubbed a slut, and people lose respect for her. Now, whats up with that! :mad:

Men get some advantages that women don't get, and women get some advantages that men don't get. It's a two way street. IMO, it all balances out.

Abstract
Aug 24, 2008, 03:12 AM
True.

Besides, I don't fully agree with what was said regarding men and women, because when I hear of 22 year olds who have slept with 50+ people, I'm disgusted whether it's a man or woman. Maybe I'm just a prude. I don't know.

It really depends on what sort of people you deal with. There are girls who would give a girl lots of credit if she was able to hook up with a hot guy.

SpaceMagic
Aug 24, 2008, 03:23 AM
:rolleyes:agreed... this is not the place to discuss these issues. It cool that this site has a wide age range but some topics deserve a private chat room... so I reported the thread sorry. besides, when you grow up you'll realize it isn't as big a deal as when you found out santa clause doesn't exist

He doesn't :o. That's rubbish! Cos I lost my virginity to one of his elves!

204467
Aug 24, 2008, 03:23 AM
Ya wanna know what pisses me off?! The fact that guys can sleep with whomever they want to, and pretty much as early as they want to...and they'll get high-fived, and receive some "way to go!"'s. And yet, in (high)school, if poeple find out that a girl has sex with someone, she is automatically dubbed a slut, and people lose respect for her. Now, whats up with that! :mad:


anyways, I'm a virgin, and I've got no problem with waiting it out.

I think that's really unfair as well; believe me, as long as it's consensual, I see no reason with either men or women having sex with a lot of people. However, I don't like the idea of a man-whore anymore than I like the idea of a female slut; to me, both ideas are pretty despicable.

Funny thing, though; my girlfriend's previous ex lost his to a hooker. Since I really hate the guy (he's a total dick) I love to joke about it to people who know him (and also hate him) or just make fun of him to his face about it.

Dagless
Aug 24, 2008, 03:42 AM
Funny thing, though; my girlfriend's previous ex lost his to a hooker. Since I really hate the guy (he's a total dick) I love to joke about it to people who know him (and also hate him) or just make fun of him to his face about it.

Now that's a shining example of maturity.

powerdave
Aug 24, 2008, 04:50 AM
True.

Besides, I don't fully agree with what was said regarding men and women, because when I hear of 22 year olds who have slept with 50+ people, I'm disgusted whether it's a man or woman.

Haha, first time I read this I interpreted it as 22 year olds sleeping with people over the age of 50. Yuck.

Surprised with the amount of 14 and 15s in the thread! I think that's too early. It seems like some people view virginity as a ticking timebomb and wander around thinking "gottaloseit gottaloseit gottaloseit gottaloseit". Take it easy!

I was 18 when I lost mine, took a few goes to get into the rhythm of things :P I think I've refound it...

TomsMacBook
Aug 24, 2008, 05:01 AM
I'm 16, so earlier this year.

Nice Scottish lass, still dating her, so it's all good. I don't like being a 'Wham-Bam-Thankyou-Mam' dude, hahaha.

h?
Aug 24, 2008, 05:44 AM
18 and i still have it. I don't care about it at the moment. I would rather have an emotional relationship with someone before a physical one. I think sex is all about trusting the other person completely and i would rather get to know them than have a one night stand

Neil321
Aug 24, 2008, 05:49 AM
I was 16, her name was sharon

Kardashian
Aug 24, 2008, 06:00 AM
Wow.

There's a lot of irritated responses here.


If you don't like the thread - don't post. Then you've not 'lowered' yourselves.
You're on an internet chat room - there's nothing to really be embarrassed about. It's not being broadcast on the 10 o'clock news with your name and picture.


Anyway.

I'm male. Gay. 19. I lost my virginity at 18, and did the other stuff around 14.

leekohler
Aug 24, 2008, 07:24 AM
Sex and the mindset of sex interests me; that's why I was so pissed when I kept missing the VH1 sex mini-series. However, I have to ask; if you don't know who cares, then why did you respond? :rolleyes:

Because really, it's kind of silly. It would be more fun to ask how many partners people have had. ;) Does it really matter at what age one has lost his/her virginity? You'll get roughly the same answers from most people. If you want to know about the "mindset of sex", this is hardly the question to ask. It's boring, to tell the truth. Ask something more fun and you'll have my attention. Of course, I'm baiting you. ;)

Ya wanna know what pisses me off?! The fact that guys can sleep with whomever they want to, and pretty much as early as they want to...and they'll get high-fived, and receive some "way to go!"'s. And yet, in (high)school, if poeple find out that a girl has sex with someone, she is automatically dubbed a slut, and people lose respect for her. Now, whats up with that! :mad:


anyways, I'm a virgin, and I've got no problem with waiting it out.

So go be a "slut" then. Why do you worry about what others think of you? I'm serious. I'm a gay man who came out when AIDS happened in the early 80's. I don't need to tell you what people said about us during those days (and indeed still do). I protected myself and slept with tons of guys. I've done full frontal nudity in a few films as well. I'm now in my 40's and completely healthy. I like who I am and could give a ******* what people think of me.

You wanna get laid, go do it. But if you're going to sit around later and worry about what people are gonna think of you, please don't. You obviously aren't ready.

Markleshark
Aug 24, 2008, 07:32 AM
Erm, 18 I think. For what it's worth...

tMac85
Aug 24, 2008, 09:01 AM
Ha! Good one!.



Ugh... Read some of my later posts in this thread, not just the first one. I believe that I offer good reasons as to the point of this thread; reasons you mights agree with, had you taken the time to read them.

I normally don't do this, but since you kind of pissed me off, you spelled "you're" wrong; you need an apostrophe.



Of course! I don't see anything wrong with that in the slightest! Of course, don't listen to me. However, I'm sure when you meet the right person, you'll find it's right and it will be good.


i read the entire thread. and i still dont think you understand that sex is a serious thing. The way your post read are all in a joking manner, a childish manner, a "awesome i can talk about this now"tone. Like i said i dont know you and i am not telling you to not, but be mature about it, there is no need to brag about it, ( not that you are) or tell everyone.( i understand you are not, but it comes across that way.) It should be a personal thing, private, and somewhat special. (not that it wasnt for you) Lets just not look back in 5 years and regret talking about it so casually. ( i know you are interested in the conversation about it, i just feel that you are so young, and mistakes happen. dont take it so personal, just look how you are coming across. (on a computer forum, of all things)

as for YOURE - YOUR'E. I dont put the apostrophe. just like i dont capitalize my "i"s That doesnt mean i spelled it worng. Atleast i put the "e" in the word and know the difference between YOUR and YOUR'E. half the kids on this forum dont.


sorry if i offended you, i was not making fun of you.

204467
Aug 24, 2008, 09:24 AM
Because really, it's kind of silly. It would be more fun to ask how many partners people have had. ;) Does it really matter at what age one has lost his/her virginity? You'll get roughly the same answers from most people. If you want to know about the "mindset of sex", this is hardly the question to ask. It's boring, to tell the truth. Ask something more fun and you'll have my attention. Of course, I'm baiting you. ;)
<snip>

I would ask more personal and interesting questions, but I get the feeling people would start reporting me to the mods left and right if I started very personal sex-related threads every which way. Besides, I would just get more flack from the people who think that my questions are too personal and would consequentially reply to flame me, but not answer the question giving me and the thread an unwanted bad rep.

i read the entire thread. and i still dont think you understand that sex is a serious thing. The way your post read are all in a joking manner, a childish manner, a "awesome i can talk about this now"tone. Like i said i dont know you and i am not telling you to not, but be mature about it, there is no need to brag about it, ( not that you are) or tell everyone.( i understand you are not, but it comes across that way.) It should be a personal thing, private, and somewhat special. (not that it wasnt for you) Lets just not look back in 5 years and regret talking about it so casually. ( i know you are interested in the conversation about it, i just feel that you are so young, and mistakes happen. dont take it so personal, just look how you are coming across. (on a computer forum, of all things)

as for YOURE - YOUR'E. I dont put the apostrophe. just like i dont capitalize my "i"s That doesnt mean i spelled it wrogn. At least i put the "e" in the word and know the difference between YOUR and YOUR'E. half the kids on this forum dont.


sorry if i offended you, i was not making fun of you.

No, I understand sex is supposed to be fun and that's all I understand about it. Saying it's serious takes all the joy out of it. A lot of the times in bed, I'm joking half the time, which only serves to make it more fun for the both of us. So I think you maybe need to chill out and lighten up.

As to half the kids on this forum not knowing the difference between you're and your, there, they're, and their, and other assorted homophones, don't forget; half the adults don't know the difference either. Bad grammar is not restricted only to childern
Now that's a shining example of maturity.

You need to meet this person before you say I'm being immature. Really. Until then, you won't get it.

tMac85
Aug 24, 2008, 09:29 AM
I would ask more personal and interesting questions, but I get the feeling people would start reporting me to the mods left and right if I started very personal sex-related threads every which way. Besides, I would just get more flack from the people who think that my questions are too personal and would consequentially reply to flame me, but not answer the question giving me and the thread an unwanted bad rep.



No, I understand sex is supposed to be fun and that's all I understand about it. Saying it's serious takes all the joy out of it. A lot of the times in bed, I'm joking half the time, which only serves to make it more fun for the both of us. So I think you maybe need to chill out and lighten up.

As to half the kids on this forum not knowing the difference between you're and your, there, they're, and their, and other assorted homophones, don't forget; half the adults don't know the difference either. Bad grammar is not restricted only to childern


You need to meet this person before you say I'm being immature. Really. Until then, you won't get it.


you win.
congrats.
have FUN


and i didnt say you were being immature. there is a difference.

kretzy
Aug 24, 2008, 09:31 AM
as for YOURE - YOUR'E. I dont put the apostrophe. just like i dont capitalize my "i"s That doesnt mean i spelled it worng. Atleast i put the "e" in the word and know the difference between YOUR and YOUR'E. half the kids on this forum dont.

So what's the difference between "your'e" and "you're"?

As for the rest of your post, I don't think the OP has been immature about anything at all in this thread. I understand and respect that some people feel that it's a private thing and maybe shouldn't be a topic for casual conversation but no one's forcing you to post anything. He was curious and asked a question...no need for being judgmental.

As for me...I lost mine when I was 18. It felt right at the time and I have no regrets about it whatsoever.

tMac85
Aug 24, 2008, 09:33 AM
So what's the difference between "your'e" and "you're"?

As for the rest of your post, I don't think the OP has been immature about anything at all in this thread. I understand and respect that some people feel that it's a private thing and maybe shouldn't be a topic for casual conversation but no one's forcing you to post anything. He was curious and asked a question...no need for being judgmental.

As for me...I lost mine when I was 18. It felt right at the time and I have no regrets about it whatsoever.



FUNNY! my mistake!

and i never said immature. i just feel the way he talks about it, he makes it sound so very casual. but hey i could be wrong. so i gave my 2 cents and he can take it or leave it.

gibbz
Aug 24, 2008, 09:34 AM
I was 18, nearly 19, with my one and only partner. I am not ashamed to admit that I wasn't prepared for the emotional roller coaster that sex introduced. She and I are 24 and will get married when school finally ends for both of us.

204467
Aug 24, 2008, 09:35 AM
you win.
congrats.
have FUN


and i didnt say you were being immature. there is a difference.

I never said you called me immature. raggedjimmi called me immature. I think you may have misread my post.

Sometimes I can't tell, though; when you said have fun, were you being sarcastic?

EDIT:FUNNY! my mistake!

and i never said immature. i just feel the way he talks about it, he makes it sound so very casual. but hey i could be wrong. so i gave my 2 cents and he can take it or leave it.

Yes, I do sound casual about sex, but like I said earlier, it's because I don't think it should be too serious. If you put sex on a pedestal, don't let anyone talk about it, and make it incredibly taboo, then chances are people won't enjoy it when they finally have it. I believe that as long as you don't give unwanted details, they're nothing wrong with talking about sex like yesterday's ballgame. Okay, maybe be a little more discreet than that. Hopefully you get the picture; sometimes I'm terrible at explaining things.

tMac85
Aug 24, 2008, 09:38 AM
somewhat sarcastic.
i know a lot of people whos lives got changed at 15.
no, not me.
friends
youre only 16, youre young. be careful. thats all.

pseudobrit
Aug 24, 2008, 10:09 AM
somewhat sarcastic.
i know a lot of people whos lives got changed at 15.
no, not me.
friends
youre only 16, youre young. be careful. thats all.

IOW, wrap that rascal.

carlgo
Aug 24, 2008, 10:10 AM
I don't buy into the slut thing. Nothing wrong with a girl who is interested and simply can't wait. My only concern is if she has been responsible about it and has a happy time with me.

First time? There I was in full adult disguise, sipping my sophisticated drink in the trendy bar. Through the smoke and ferns (this was long ago) I saw her, all languid eyes and pouty lips. She smiled at me! A drink appeared, and then another...

Iscariot
Aug 24, 2008, 10:23 AM
I'm starting to get some blips on my righteousometer.

All y'all need to chill out. If you're comfortable answer the OP's question that's dandy, but if you're opining on the opinion or experiences of another poster then you're politicizing a thread that don't need to be politicized. If you want to dish it out on the pros and cons of virginity then feel free to make your own thread. Otherwise all you're doing is picking a fight on a personal issue that doesn't warrant it. And I assure you as it has been in the past, when it comes to a war of words you best get out of here before the Brits wake up, on account of them inventing most of 'em.

pseudobrit
Aug 24, 2008, 10:30 AM
And I assure you as it has been in the past, when it comes to a war of words you best get out of here before the Brits wake up, on account of them inventing most of 'em.

All the good ones they stole. Then they put all their Puritans on westbound boat rides.

bbotte
Aug 24, 2008, 10:42 AM
You don't truly lose your virginity until you go at it "bareback". Totally different.

Shotglass
Aug 24, 2008, 11:46 AM
I started drinking at 14, smoking (I never really did, but yeh) at 15, and smoking weed at 16. Now I'm 17, and I have never had sex. So yeah, despite all efforts, I haven't lost my virginity completely. I don't have a problem with it, but I'm not gonna say I'm proud of it. I don't want to be one of those people who get all defensive about it, and act like it's their choice. I've never met someone who I was actually really in love with, and I'll wait until that happens. It's pretty simple, really.

Ugg
Aug 24, 2008, 11:56 AM
The real travesty is how long it's been since the last time I've been laid.

Same here!

I was either 20 or 21. It's been too long ago to remember...

revenuee
Aug 24, 2008, 12:38 PM
I'm not saying how old -- that's personal.

However, I will say I couldn't wait to get it done and over with.

When I started driving it felt a lot like the first time I had sex; I was nervous and worried I would make a mistake.

But once I got that first time out of the way I couldn't wait to get behind the wheel and do it again. <-- and then do them at the same time :)

The age you should loose your virginity is the age you think you should loose your virginity.

the rest of my post is towards guys because I'm not going to pretend to empathize with the female condition <-- I would be interested in a female perspective for purely academic interest.

you're 30 and haven't had sex yet because you want to wait till your married? great! ... but don't expect any more respect from me on that merit alone.

you lost your virginity at 14? Cool, I hope it was fun, but I hope you used protection because being a dad at 15 won't be fun. <-- and you are certainly no more of a man in my eyes.

Sex is not mystical. It's a primitive biological function no more complicated then going to the bathroom.

You want to hold something of value? do something of value, research a cheap alternative fuel source. <-- as one of a million examples.

Any idiot with an erection can ****.

I'll say it a again, sex is not mystical, and it's not taboo. It is a fun way to burn some calories and a great activity for a day off. It's used for making babies. It can be a great way to get revenge. It can be a great way to get something you want (if you're good ;) ) <-- and to the romantics, it can really bring two people together.

But a man it makes you not.

Prof.
Aug 24, 2008, 12:45 PM
18 and i still have it. I don't care about it at the moment. I would rather have an emotional relationship with someone before a physical one. I think sex is all about trusting the other person completely and i would rather get to know them than have a one night stand
I'm with ya!

I wanna wait for the right person b4 I do anything (too cliche?) As of right now, sex isn't that important to me.

Side Note: With all the complaints I've read saying this topic is "too personal", It sure has taken off. People love talking about sex, no matter the setting.

tresbien
Aug 24, 2008, 12:54 PM
So go be a "slut" then. Why do you worry about what others think of you? I'm serious. I'm a gay man who came out when AIDS happened in the early 80's. I don't need to tell you what people said about us during those days (and indeed still do). I protected myself and slept with tons of guys. I've done full frontal nudity in a few films as well. I'm now in my 40's and completely healthy. I like who I am and could give a ******* what people think of me.

You wanna get laid, go do it. But if you're going to sit around later and worry about what people are gonna think of you, please don't. You obviously aren't ready.

I suppose I didn't really convey that fact that I couldn't care less about what people think about me, but I feel sorry for girls who get a "bad reputation" because they've chosen to have sex. I know a lot of guys at my school are more likely to date a certain girl just because she's willing to have sex with them, and I think thats messed up. And yeah, obviously I'm not ready, which is why I'm not having sex. Unlike a lot of other people my age, I'm in no rush to get it over with!

Melrose
Aug 24, 2008, 12:58 PM
You don't truly lose your virginity until you go at it "bareback". Totally different.

Is that like side-saddle? I'm afraid I don't know much about tack and dressage... :D

TuffLuffJimmy
Aug 24, 2008, 01:04 PM
Is that like side-saddle? I'm afraid I don't know much about tack and dressage... :D

bareback is sans condom.

Prof.
Aug 24, 2008, 01:07 PM
bareback is sans condom.
Last time it only has to do with gay sex and not straight sex. Unless terms have changed.:confused:

ismoker
Aug 24, 2008, 01:07 PM
lol

Melrose
Aug 24, 2008, 01:11 PM
bareback is sans condom.

Really? Are you sure? I don't believe you! Really? :rolleyes:

TuffLuffJimmy
Aug 24, 2008, 01:12 PM
Last time it only has to do with gay sex and not straight sex. Unless terms have changed.:confused:

I've only heard it in terms of gay sex as well. However, upon consulting urban dictionary I read that it can include straight sex as well. But I think that it is more commonly used in terms of gay sex.

Prof.
Aug 24, 2008, 01:15 PM
But I think that it is more commonly used in terms of gay sex.
Of course! The gays came up with the term. Go us!:D:cool:

Dagless
Aug 24, 2008, 01:16 PM
I suppose I didn't really convey that fact that I couldn't care less about what people think about me, but I feel sorry for girls who get a "bad reputation" because they've chosen to have sex. I know a lot of guys at my school are more likely to date a certain girl just because she's willing to have sex with them, and I think thats messed up. And yeah, obviously I'm not ready, which is why I'm not having sex. Unlike a lot of other people my age, I'm in no rush to get it over with!
Meh, this happens. And TBH the girl with the most respect (on my college course) was the one who never spoke about sex. For all we knew she could have had lads lining up outside her room, or she could be waiting till marriage. We just never knew.


I'll say it a again, sex is not mystical, and it's not taboo. It is a fun way to burn some calories and a great activity for a day off. It's used for making babies. It can be a great way to get revenge. It can be a great way to get something you want (if you're good ;) ) <-- and to the romantics, it can really bring two people together.


It's entirely what you make of it. Remove all standards and humility and such and nothing is taboo. With no external involvement I made the decision to value my virginity - or rather to wait until the perfect moment with the girl I will spend the rest of my life with (give or take possible accidental deaths, emprisonment etc). For a lot of people it is just street cred, it is just something they want to get over and done with as soon as.
I respect anyones choice on the matter because it really is what you make of it yourself. Just one of them things I suppose.

revenuee
Aug 24, 2008, 01:35 PM
It's entirely what you make of it. Remove all standards and humility and such and nothing is taboo. With no external involvement I made the decision to value my virginity - or rather to wait until the perfect moment with the girl I will spend the rest of my life with (give or take possible accidental deaths, emprisonment etc). For a lot of people it is just street cred, it is just something they want to get over and done with as soon as.
I respect anyones choice on the matter because it really is what you make of it yourself. Just one of them things I suppose.

Taboos about sex have been imposed to keep use from going buck wild and having babies we can't support <-- we're not in the animal kingdom. ;) It's why birth control in the sixties created the sexual revolution.

your right, in regards to street cred -- a lot of people do it for that -- hense my "your not a man just cause you figured out the plumbing" speech.

I hold a lot of value in discretion ... As a guy my reputation has the majority of the time worked in my favour. -- However, I do think it's unfair that girls get a reputation and it's negative ... for that reason, I never talk about the girls I sleep with to anyone -- anytime anyone finds it is if SHE told them.

This has actually made for some funny situations in my life -- there has been several occasions where I sat surround by a group of girls, all friends, all of whom I've had some degree if liason with. BUT non of them knew about the other ones -- nothing gets me more excited then sitting in a mine field like that ;)

bbotte
Aug 24, 2008, 02:32 PM
I was referring to no condom and heterosexual sex.

TuffLuffJimmy
Aug 24, 2008, 02:36 PM
I was referring to... heterosexual sex.

Sure you were ;)

revenuee
Aug 24, 2008, 02:37 PM
I was referring to no condom and heterosexual sex.

Ya, I really don't the stress of children ;)

leekohler
Aug 24, 2008, 02:43 PM
I suppose I didn't really convey that fact that I couldn't care less about what people think about me, but I feel sorry for girls who get a "bad reputation" because they've chosen to have sex. I know a lot of guys at my school are more likely to date a certain girl just because she's willing to have sex with them, and I think thats messed up. And yeah, obviously I'm not ready, which is why I'm not having sex. Unlike a lot of other people my age, I'm in no rush to get it over with!

Good for you.

I was referring to no condom and heterosexual sex.

You bareback, you better damn well be prepared to pay the consequences. Barebacking is the dumbest thing you can do. If you're ready to have a kid, or really wanting a nasty STD, go for it. Otherwise, keep it in your pants, please.

Sptz
Aug 24, 2008, 03:02 PM
Good for you.



You bareback, you better damn well be prepared to pay the consequences. Barebacking is the dumbest thing you can do. If you're ready to have a kid, or really wanting a nasty STD, go for it. Otherwise, keep it in your pants, please.

It depends actually... If you have a long term relationship and both are confortable with it, your girlfirend takes the pill, it prevents 99.9% of the times... so theoretically you COULD have sex without condoms, although me and my girlfriend still do with condoms because we're to afraid of slipping that 0.1%, but sometimes (very often) you just don't care :p

leekohler
Aug 24, 2008, 03:11 PM
It depends actually... If you have a long term relationship and both are confortable with it, your girlfirend takes the pill, it prevents 99.9% of the times... so theoretically you COULD have sex without condoms, although me and my girlfriend still do with condoms because we're to afraid of slipping that 0.1%, but sometimes (very often) you just don't care :p

That would also require that neither of you ever sleep around. And let's face it, do you think either you or your girlfriend would run home and tell the other if that happened? People cheat, it happens.

204467
Aug 24, 2008, 03:36 PM
Good for you.



You bareback, you better damn well be prepared to pay the consequences. Barebacking is the dumbest thing you can do. If you're ready to have a kid, or really wanting a nasty STD, go for it. Otherwise, keep it in your pants, please.

Yeah, but what really boggles my mind is that some people think that pulling out is a successful form of birth control. Dumb@$$es.

It depends actually... If you have a long term relationship and both are confortable with it, your girlfirend takes the pill, it prevents 99.9% of the times... so theoretically you COULD have sex without condoms, although me and my girlfriend still do with condoms because we're to afraid of slipping that 0.1%, but sometimes (very often) you just don't care :p

Yeah, even if my girlfriend goes on the pill, I don't know if I would want to do it without condoms, or at least some other form of birth control. But then again, I just worry a lot.

That would also require that neither of you ever sleep around. And let's face it, do you think either you or your girlfriend would run home and tell the other if that happened? People cheat, it happens.

Personally, I would feel too terrible if I had cheated; after the act of cheating had "come to fruition" if you know what I mean, I would just feel really guilty and probably wouldn't be able to face my girlfriend. But that's just me. Plus, I think she too would tell me, or I'd be able to tell; then again, I'm very trusting and don't ever expect her to cheat.

northy124
Aug 24, 2008, 03:37 PM
I was 14 and a bit drunk at the time (When I say a bit I mean allot:rolleyes:), Ah it was great I thought at the time but looking back I wish I hadn't been drunk, Much better sober.

Prof.
Aug 24, 2008, 03:37 PM
With all this talk of STD's in health class and on the news, it sounds like you're almost guaranteed to get an STD.:eek::eek::eek:

Gray-Wolf
Aug 24, 2008, 03:39 PM
In this day and age, you ARE more likely to get one.

TuffLuffJimmy
Aug 24, 2008, 03:41 PM
With all this talk of STD's in health class and on the news, it sounds like you're almost guaranteed to get an STD.:eek::eek::eek:

Two of my friends just tested positive for clamidia. Funny enough it's how we found out 'Jacob' was bi...

I do think the media blows everything out of proportion just to scare people. 'Jacob' and 'Will' I wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole, they're a little too sexually curious and obviously it got them into trouble.

Prof.
Aug 24, 2008, 03:44 PM
Yup. I'm scared now. :eek::(

204467
Aug 24, 2008, 03:46 PM
With all this talk of STD's in health class and on the news, it sounds like you're almost guaranteed to get an STD.:eek::eek::eek:

Only if you're an idiot and don't use proper protection. Just remember; the condom is the only form of birth control that also protects against STD's.

But you forget; you can't call them STD's anymore; they're now STI's (sexually transmitted infections). Personally, I like STD better and forget/refuse to call it an STI.

leekohler
Aug 24, 2008, 03:46 PM
Yup. I'm scared now. :eek::(

Don't be scared, be smart.

Shaun.P
Aug 24, 2008, 04:01 PM
20. And I completely regret it.

Prof.
Aug 24, 2008, 04:02 PM
20. And I completely regret it.
Did you wanna wait?

Shaun.P
Aug 24, 2008, 04:06 PM
Did you wanna wait?

I only did it to get it over and done with. :(.

AKA. One night stand in a hotel with someone I was talking to online.

TuffLuffJimmy
Aug 24, 2008, 04:11 PM
I only did it to get it over and done with. :(.

AKA. One night stand in a hotel with someone I was talking to online.

EEK

Gray-Wolf
Aug 24, 2008, 04:11 PM
Regrets, the one thing that can never be undone. But will anyone ever learn from others mistakes. Doubtful... :apple:

Shaun.P
Aug 24, 2008, 04:12 PM
EEK

And cheap wine :).

We did meet once prior, but the second time was just mainly for sex.

ZiggyPastorius
Aug 24, 2008, 04:23 PM
No offense to either of you (or anyone else) intended, but virginity is not something that is special by nature; it is special only if you consider it as such. I lost my virginity at the culmination of an amazing and life-changing journey, the likes of which I have never experienced in the many years since. I also lost it to the right person (they were the right person at the time) under the right circumstances in a situation that was so "magical" it could be a Hollywood movie. The story was so amazing it still touches people to this day.

Despite that, I have had sex that has been vastly more special since then, and with different people no less. The beauty of life is that special is what we make it. You can have amazing and truly touching sex with someone you've known all your life, or someone you've known for ten minutes. I certainly respect that you have both made your own decisions and I am in no way trying to tell you that you're wrong, but in this thread and in others there seems to be a sense of moral superiority from both sides of the fence. Waiting for sex isn't necessarily going to make it more special, unless that's what special means to you.

Thank you for saying this...I was about to say the exact same thing until I read this post :)

Ha! Good one!.



Ugh... Read some of my later posts in this thread, not just the first one. I believe that I offer good reasons as to the point of this thread; reasons you mights agree with, had you taken the time to read them.

I normally don't do this, but since you kind of pissed me off, you spelled "you're" wrong; you need an apostrophe.



Of course! I don't see anything wrong with that in the slightest! Of course, don't listen to me. However, I'm sure when you meet the right person, you'll find it's right and it will be good.

I don't normally do this, but you've continuously misused semi-colons throughout this thread. Not necessarily in this post, but in many of your posts.

But, anyways...I was 16. It was awkward, though certainly special, and has been special every time we've done it. I'm smart about it, I get better all the time (I think :p), and it's fun.

And if anyone is curious, we were watching the movie "The Doors," when it happened :p

Oh, and I'm a male.

Edit: I also don't regret it at all.

204467
Aug 24, 2008, 04:37 PM
Thank you for saying this...I was about to say the exact same thing until I read this post :)



I don't normally do this, but you've continuously misused semi-colons throughout this thread. Not necessarily in this post, but in many of your posts.

But, anyways...I was 16. It was awkward, though certainly special, and has been special every time we've done it. I'm smart about it, I get better all the time (I think :p), and it's fun.

And if anyone is curious, we were watching the movie "The Doors," when it happened :p

Oh, and I'm a male.

Edit: I also don't regret it at all.

Have I really misused semi-colons? I guess I like them better than creating either short sentences or else run-on sentences. Again, this is why I'm not an English guy, I'm more of a math/science guy.

revenuee
Aug 24, 2008, 05:08 PM
There is a lot of talk about the "right" person.

It's a cute notion I suppose ... but if I waited for the "right" person ... I'd still be a virgin and would of missed out on years of fornication. < -- and that I would of regretted. I certainly don't regret the circumstances under which I lost mine.

bbotte
Aug 24, 2008, 05:13 PM
Good for you.



You bareback, you better damn well be prepared to pay the consequences. Barebacking is the dumbest thing you can do. If you're ready to have a kid, or really wanting a nasty STD, go for it. Otherwise, keep it in your pants, please.

No worries mate, I was married for 5 years before we had our first child, I've never had an STD, and my daughter was very very planned, we tried for 6 months a lot. :)

Dagless
Aug 24, 2008, 05:15 PM
It's a cute notion I suppose ... but if I waited for the "right" person ... I'd still be a virgin

People cheat, it happens.

This is where I count myself extremely lucky.

XnavxeMiyyep
Aug 24, 2008, 05:17 PM
Lost it at eighteen. Nineteen now. No regrets for losing it, other than maybe I should've lost it earlier, but that's irrelevant now.

leekohler
Aug 24, 2008, 05:21 PM
There is a lot of talk about the "right" person.

It's a cute notion I suppose ... but if I waited for the "right" person ... I'd still be a virgin and would of missed out on years of fornication. < -- and that I would of regretted. I certainly don't regret the circumstances under which I lost mine.

Yep- relationships are great, but who says you can't have fun when you aren't in one? ;)

iJesus
Aug 24, 2008, 06:27 PM
Anyways, I was 15 (like 3 days until my 16th birthday) when I lost mine.

Looking back, it was a great experience. That was the first time I ever felt so emotionally and physically attached to someone. And the best part was, I cared so much about the person that we even laughed when either of us did something wrong.

I'm 17 now and I still haven't had the same type of experience. :(

sushi
Aug 24, 2008, 07:04 PM
Just some comments...

Sex = Biological

Making Love = Emotional

Each has to decide what is right for them. It's not a competition.

As others have mentioned, there is risk associated with having sex such as pregnancies, STDs (or STIs if you want).

Condoms break and are not foolproof. When using a condom that breaks, an STD can get passed or a pregnancy can occur.

Don't bow to peer pressure to dictate how you will live your life. Do what is right for you -- what feels comfortable. It's your life and your body. You only get one of each.

Iscariot
Aug 24, 2008, 07:43 PM
Good for you.



You bareback, you better damn well be prepared to pay the consequences. Barebacking is the dumbest thing you can do. If you're ready to have a kid, or really wanting a nasty STD, go for it. Otherwise, keep it in your pants, please.

That would also require that neither of you ever sleep around. And let's face it, do you think either you or your girlfriend would run home and tell the other if that happened? People cheat, it happens.

The couple that gets tested together, barebacks together.

leekohler
Aug 24, 2008, 08:09 PM
The couple that gets tested together, barebacks together.

Hmm...possibly. I'd still be wary. ;)

revenuee
Aug 24, 2008, 08:22 PM
The couple that gets tested together, barebacks together.

hahahaha --- awesome

I used to get tested more often because I was more active -- but I still do it pretty regularly.

There was nurse that was doing training in the Health and Education Centre who suggested that if you've been with more then 5 partners you are almost guaranteed to have HPV -- never bothered following up.

Anyway I don't like being with just one person at any given time so I wrap it up; even if she is on the pill. I've got a few friends that are in long term relationships who joke about how every month they high five with their girlfriends when they get their period. <-- I don't want that kinda stress.

MrSmith
Aug 24, 2008, 09:25 PM
18. No big deal losing it or keeping it, IMO.

No, I don't think I'm "cool" because I lost it then; in fact, I didn't tell anyone about it until I was directly asked about it. And even then, I wasn't bragging, I basically went "Yeah, [girlfriend's name] and I had sex about a week ago. Can I change the subject now?" (though a friend of mine heard the news and hugged me upon hearing it, which still makes me laugh).
If you were responsibly and mentally ready for sex your answer would have been "None of your business".

...I've done full frontal nudity in a few films as well...
Tell me it's just coincidence (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1559504/)...

revenuee
Aug 24, 2008, 09:27 PM
Tell me it's just coincidence (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1559504/)...

oh my god ...

great search

TuffLuffJimmy
Aug 24, 2008, 09:28 PM
Tell me it's just coincidence (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1559504/)...

Oh now I feel stupid. I always thought his user name was Leek Ohler.

pseudobrit
Aug 24, 2008, 10:35 PM
The couple that gets tested together, barebacks together.

When I first read that I saw "trashed" where you wrote "tested".

spearhard
Aug 24, 2008, 11:19 PM
Depends on how you define virginity. That's a discussion in itself of course.

Probably at 22. Neither male nor female. Other people do generally put me into one of those boxes but this being the internet I have a rare opportunity to deprive you of the chance.

grouper
Aug 25, 2008, 12:14 AM
full on "intercourse", i think i was 21

204467
Aug 25, 2008, 02:31 AM
18. No big deal losing it or keeping it, IMO.


If you were responsibly and mentally ready for sex your answer would have been "None of your business".


Tell me it's just coincidence (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1559504/)...

Well, since I don't think I've been seriously damaged emotionally by sex (even if it is fantastic) I think I would consider myself emotionally ready for sex. And since I am the one in my relationship who always advocates a condom, even the day after my girlfriend's period ends (she brings this up occasionally) I would say I am responsible enough for sex (I think that's what you meant by "responsibly ready for sex"). Anyway, it's still my life, not yours, so even if you don't agree with my decisions, I do agree with them. Plus, there's nothing you can do about what I've done or what I plan to do; it's my life, not yours.

TuffLuffJimmy
Aug 25, 2008, 02:49 AM
Well, since I don't think I've been seriously damaged emotionally by sex (even if it is fantastic) I think I would consider myself emotionally ready for sex. And since I am the one in my relationship who always advocates a condom, even the day after my girlfriend's period ends (she brings this up occasionally) I would say I am responsible enough for sex (I think that's what you meant by "responsibly ready for sex"). Anyway, it's still my life, not yours, so even if you don't agree with my decisions, I do agree with them. Plus, there's nothing you can do about what I've done or what I plan to do; it's my life, not yours.

I agree. I hate it when other people try and push their morals on to other people. I hate video games, not because I'm against them I just don't like playing them I get bored. But I hate it when someone tries to get certain games banned. If they don't want their children playing those games then be parents and don't let them, they don't have the right to be the parent to everyone else and say they can't play those games.

204467
Aug 25, 2008, 03:04 AM
I agree. I hate it when other people try and push their morals on to other people. I hate video games, not because I'm against them I just don't like playing them I get bored. But I hate it when someone tries to get certain games banned. If they don't want their children playing those games then be parents and don't let them, they don't have the right to be the parent to everyone else and say they can't play those games.

Interesting analogy, but I understand what you mean.

FadeToBlack
Aug 25, 2008, 03:28 AM
Still a virgin at 24, 25 in January. Eh, it'll happen when it's meant to, I suppose. I'm not really in a hurry.

MrSmith
Aug 25, 2008, 09:28 AM
Well, since I don't think I've been seriously damaged emotionally by sex (even if it is fantastic) I think I would consider myself emotionally ready for sex. And since I am the one in my relationship who always advocates a condom, even the day after my girlfriend's period ends (she brings this up occasionally) I would say I am responsible enough for sex (I think that's what you meant by "responsibly ready for sex"). Anyway, it's still my life, not yours, so even if you don't agree with my decisions, I do agree with them. Plus, there's nothing you can do about what I've done or what I plan to do; it's my life, not yours.
Yeah, maybe I'm just a square old git who shouldn't give his opinion, but telling your mates - as well as the entire MR population - when and how you last had sex with your girlfriend doesn't fill me with a lot of confidence in your maturity level. Oh, and now her period is up for discussion, too. :rolleyes:

It's your life. Do with it what you will.

As for the guy comparing sex with video games...I guess that's why Chavs exist.

Melrose
Aug 25, 2008, 09:29 AM
As for the guy comparing sex with video games...I guess that's why Chavs exist.

I'd say that depends on the video game in question. Super Mario Kart? I don't think so...

MrSmith
Aug 25, 2008, 09:32 AM
I'd say that depends on the video game in question. Super Mario Kart? I don't think so...
A mortal blow...

leekohler
Aug 25, 2008, 09:47 AM
Yeah, maybe I'm just a square old git who shouldn't give his opinion, but telling your mates - as well as the entire MR population - when and how you last had sex with your girlfriend doesn't fill me with a lot of confidence in your maturity level. Oh, and now her period is up for discussion, too. :rolleyes:

It's your life. Do with it what you will.



Oh please- as if there's something wrong with discussing these things out in the open. If anything, we need to discuss these things more, not less. Not talking about this stuff certainly hasn't helped.

MrSmith
Aug 25, 2008, 09:59 AM
You want to talk about the last crap I had? Some things are best talked about between your nearest and dearest.

Melrose
Aug 25, 2008, 10:01 AM
Oh please- as if there's something wrong with discussing these things out in the open. If anything, we need to discuss these things more, not less. Not talking about this stuff certainly hasn't helped.

I believe that we should have some form of propriety about discussing stuff like this though. At the very least, put it in the Social Issues section or create a new section to talk about sex.

I don't think putting a sexual topic in a public forum is appropriate unless you make sure that members are over the age of 16 or whatever. Now, beat me up about it...

whooleytoo
Aug 25, 2008, 10:15 AM
24, and it was very much a "getting it over and done with" thing (And only twice since, and I'm 35 now.) It would have been much better if it had been with someone I knew better and really liked, but no point moaning about it now..

So this thread is making me frisky. Coffee makes me frisky. Days ending in "y" make me frisky! :p

tMac85
Aug 25, 2008, 10:31 AM
Yeah, maybe I'm just a square old git who shouldn't give his opinion, but telling your mates - as well as the entire MR population - when and how you last had sex with your girlfriend doesn't fill me with a lot of confidence in your maturity level. Oh, and now her period is up for discussion, too. :rolleyes:

It's your life. Do with it what you will.

As for the guy comparing sex with video games...I guess that's why Chavs exist.

i could not agree with you more. This was the point i was trying to get across earlier in this thread. props. you said it better

savanahrose
Aug 25, 2008, 10:44 AM
First of all, it's nobody's business whether I am or not.

secondly, if you are, be proud of the fact you've hung onto it and will make the first time with the right woman (eg: your wife and best friend.. and by saying that I'm not pre-judging those that have given theirs up) special. Virginity isn't something to be ashamed of.

I resent the phrasing of that remark.

I love your answer. I would be more proud by holding onto my virginity than by losing it.

I personally was 18 and lost it when I met my husband. my daughter was 21 when she lost hers and met her husband.

My son waited until he thought he was in love then he actually told me.
I always was open about sex with my kids. Maybe that helped them.

204467
Aug 25, 2008, 10:46 AM
Yeah, maybe I'm just a square old git who shouldn't give his opinion, but telling your mates - as well as the entire MR population - when and how you last had sex with your girlfriend doesn't fill me with a lot of confidence in your maturity level. Oh, and now her period is up for discussion, too. :rolleyes:

It's your life. Do with it what you will.

As for the guy comparing sex with video games...I guess that's why Chavs exist.

Hmm...Don't forget that this is a pretty much anonymous internet forum; I'm sure that nobody here knows who I am, since I haven't left enough information in my posts for somebody to find me and I've never directly told anyone who I am here. So I don't see anything wrong with talking about these kinds of things.

Oh please- as if there's something wrong with discussing these things out in the open. If anything, we need to discuss these things more, not less. Not talking about this stuff certainly hasn't helped.

I agree wholeheartedly. Not talking about sex makes it taboo, which in turn scares people away from it and gives them strange ideas about it that aren't always good ones.

sushi
Aug 25, 2008, 10:49 AM
Very nice! :)

I personally was 18 and lost it when I met my husband.

my daughter was 21 when she lost hers and met her husband.

savanahrose
Aug 25, 2008, 10:59 AM
Thanks. I am very proud of that.
I had my chances when I was younger but said no thanks.

vniow
Aug 25, 2008, 11:01 AM
<silverman>
"I didn't lose my virginity until I was twenty-six. Nineteen vaginally, but twenty-six what my boyfriend calls "the real way"."
</silverman>


On another note, am I right in seeing that people are actually complaining about the content/nature of this thread? I knew I felt my prude-o-meter tingling when I clicked on this thread, or maybe that was me loving my virginity in another way...

I find the accusations of immaturity in this thread to be highly amusing. If you can't talk about sex in a mature way then well, stay out of the thread. And don't have sex until you're ready to do so if you haven't already started, otherwise I feel for what poor sucker ends up being opposite you.

Speaking of, everyone in this thread needs to have more sex, myself included. Time to start on that whole "slut" thing...

vniow
Aug 25, 2008, 11:27 AM
secondly, if you are, be proud of the fact you've hung onto it and will make the first time with the right woman (eg: your wife and best friend.. and by saying that I'm not pre-judging those that have given theirs up) special. Virginity isn't something to be ashamed of.


I would argue that its not anything to be proud of either, especially if you're "hanging onto it" (by dear life) until you meet the "right" partner for the remainder of your existence which is sure to work out fantastically. I was never proud of my virginity or lack thereof before and after it happened, it simply happened and was a point in my life everyone goes through. Well, most everyone.

The whole idea of attributing pride to something like this only seeks to increase the the abundance of ideas such as no sex before marriage, purity balls, chastity rings, abstinence (education), the idea that virginity can be "restored", that you're "pure and innocent" before you get laid for the first time and overall a very narrow (not to mention boring and well, wrong) view about sexuality. If you want to be proud of something, be proud and grateful if you're one of the lucky ones who received proper sex education and acted on it accordingly. Don't be proud if you simply have not crossed the threshold yet. YMMV on this one for sure. This does not mean however that one should be pressured to have it or not to have it. It is a personal thing after all, but its something everyone goes through. And if you haven't yet you should.

leekohler
Aug 25, 2008, 11:36 AM
18. No big deal losing it or keeping it, IMO.


If you were responsibly and mentally ready for sex your answer would have been "None of your business".


Tell me it's just coincidence (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1559504/)...

Nope- that's me. I wish they'd update that page. There are more than just those three films out there.

Melrose
Aug 25, 2008, 11:37 AM
Thanks. I am very proud of that.
I had my chances when I was younger but said no thanks.

That is to be commended. Good for you. :) And it's good to hear also that you trained your children to view it maturely as well.

leekohler
Aug 25, 2008, 11:38 AM
You want to talk about the last crap I had? Some things are best talked about between your nearest and dearest.

Sure- shape, size, color? You don't know me very well. I'll talk about anything. :) Perhaps this should be moved PRSI though.

savanahrose
Aug 25, 2008, 11:41 AM
The whole idea of attributing pride to something like this only seeks to increase the the abundance of ideas such as no sex before marriage,


I am not a prude by no means but what is wrong with being proud of this? You make it sound like a bad thing that I and others have waited. It used to be that having your virginity meant something in life. I still adhere to it. If others wants sex with multiple partners I am not going to judge them or put them down. Nor will I high five them and slap them on the back.

To me sex is something that is beautiful between two people who love each other. I don't know how other people ( I know a few who) can sleep with someone they picked up in a bar that night. Prudish? Maybe I am after all. But it is still beautiful with the one that you love.:D

Mord
Aug 25, 2008, 11:51 AM
I'll talk about anything. :)

OH RLY?

MrSmith
Aug 25, 2008, 11:51 AM
Sure- shape, size, color? You don't know me very well. I'll talk about anything. :) Perhaps this should be moved PRSI though.
I know what you're saying. I can talk about anything, too. But here I think the OP is just embarrassing himself.

sushi
Aug 25, 2008, 11:52 AM
Nope- that's me. I wish they'd update that page. There are more than just those three films out there.
Cool! :)

I am not a prude by no means but what is wrong with being proud of this?
Nothing.

To me sex is something that is beautiful between two people who love each other.
Yep.

I don't know how other people ( I know a few who) can sleep with someone they picked up in a bar that night. Prudish? Maybe I am after all. But it is still beautiful with the one that you love.:D
Different folks view virginity differently, that much is certain.

What I think is most important in this discussion, is that we all respect each other's opinion whether we agree or disagree with it.

In the FWIW category, I think our views on topics like this change as we go through life. I know it did for me, and I know it has for many friends of mine. Part of the aging process I guess. :)

The one thing or idea if you will that sticks out in my mind, is never fall for peer pressure. Always do what is right for you.

Melrose
Aug 25, 2008, 11:52 AM
Don't be proud if you simply have not crossed the threshold yet.
...
And if you haven't yet you should.

So the real message here is be loose and immoral? Society - for some apparently unknown and curious reason - managed to survive and even flourish for thousands of years whilst maintaining a strong set of morals (and until only recently - last 50 years or so - it was the common vagrant classes that slept around so freely). Morals have only declined since the 20th century and more so than ever since the 60s. To move in with someone and sleep with people gratuitously would be frowned upon even 50 years ago - it was viewed as shameful and out-of-the-ordinary. I don't call the change in recent years as simply being more intellectually advanced, I call that a decline in self discipline and moral judgement.

The fact that one possesses strong enough will power to avoid casual sex doesn't make them a prude, doesn't make them any less 'good' a person. It simply means you've got a higher standard you live by. It means you have virtue, not a meaningless set of 'personal values.' ("I only sleep with 5 different people a week" isn't virtue. It personal values... there's a difference)

I am not a prude by no means but what is wrong with being proud of this? You make it sound like a bad thing that I and others have waited. It used to be that having your virginity meant something in life. I still adhere to it. If others wants sex with multiple partners I am not going to judge them or put them down. Nor will I high five them and slap them on the back.

To me sex is something that is beautiful between two people who love each other. I don't know how other people ( I know a few who) can sleep with someone they picked up in a bar that night. Prudish? Maybe I am after all. But it is still beautiful with the one that you love.:D
Well said.

leekohler
Aug 25, 2008, 11:57 AM
OH RLY?

Oh quit- you know it's true. :)

I know what you're saying. I can talk about anything, too. But here I think the OP is just embarrassing himself.

Oh, I don't know. I thought it was interesting he brought it up.

wongulous
Aug 25, 2008, 12:02 PM
I lost my virginity at 175.

Pounds, that is. I had been obese from childhood, and it wasn't until I had lost weight and I was 175 pounds that I lost my virginity in any way. I was also 18 years old, but I think that is less significant in my story.

MrSmith
Aug 25, 2008, 12:09 PM
So the real message here is be loose and immoral? Society - for some apparently unknown and curious reason - managed to survive and even flourish for thousands of years whilst maintaining a strong set of morals (and until only recently - last 50 years or so - it was the common vagrant classes that slept around so freely). Morals have only declined since the 20th century and more so than ever since the 60s. To move in with someone and sleep with people gratuitously would be frowned upon even 50 years ago - it was viewed as shameful and out-of-the-ordinary. I don't call the change in recent years as simply being more intellectually advanced, I call that a decline in self discipline and moral judgement.

The fact that one possesses strong enough will power to avoid casual sex doesn't make them a prude, doesn't make them any less 'good' a person. It simply means you've got a higher standard you live by. It means you have virture, not a meaningless set of 'personal values.'

Good post. It used to be we listened to and respected what our parents said. Now we just do what we want and **** 'em. Is society better or worse for it? That's the question all adults, especially parents, need to ask themselves.

vniow
Aug 25, 2008, 12:09 PM
I am not a prude by no means but what is wrong with being proud of this?


Be proud of it all you want, but keep in mind the idea of waiting until marriage is a highly unrealistic goal, nor it it always the healthiest decision to make both for yourself and for your eventual partner(s). How long have humans been having sex compared to how long has marriage as we know it been around? This whole notion of one man one woman marriage is very very recent, as is the idea of no sex before it. Most researchers who study human sexuality argue that the aforementioned pairing is one of the most recent, unproven and often problematic forms of sexuality that has occurred in human history.


You make it sound like a bad thing that I and others have waited.

Have not.

It used to be that having your virginity meant something in life.


You're right, it meant being a virgin.


To me sex is something that is beautiful between two people who love each other.

It is. Its also so much more than that.

I don't know how other people ( I know a few who) can sleep with someone they picked up in a bar that night.


Because its fun?


But it is still beautiful with the one that you love.:D

That's one form of beauty for certain, however it is far from the only one.

sushi
Aug 25, 2008, 12:13 PM
I lost my virginity at 175.

Pounds, that is. I had been obese from childhood, and it wasn't until I had lost weight and I was 175 pounds that I lost my virginity in any way. I was also 18 years old, but I think that is less significant in my story.
Now that is a different way of looking at it. :)

balofagus
Aug 25, 2008, 12:14 PM
The fact that one possesses strong enough will power to avoid casual sex doesn't make them a prude, doesn't make them any less 'good' a person. It simply means you've got a higher standard you live by. It means you have virtue, not a meaningless set of 'personal values.' ("I only sleep with 5 different people a week" isn't virtue. It personal values... there's a difference)


And having sex before marriage, before your 25 or before you're financially able to support a child does not make one a terrible person either.

How can what one values be eliminated by having sex. I haven't had sex, but if did, do I somehow no longer love my mother, or respect other humans? When do I lose my values? Right at the start? Half-way through? Upon "completion"? Virginity is an absurd value. I don't think anyone in this thread is promoting promiscuity.

That said, if you value your virginity, great for you. If you've had sex, great for you. But who is anyone to tell another how to live his or her life?

** Sorry, I alternate when writing between use of male and female pronouns (only one per piece of course :P). My English teachers have always hated it too... but I don't really like "gender inclusive" writing. **

northy124
Aug 25, 2008, 12:17 PM
But who is anyone to tell another how to live his or her life?

Fixed it :).

BTW this discussion is just interesting.

Dagless
Aug 25, 2008, 12:17 PM
My son waited until he thought he was in love then he actually told me.
I always was open about sex with my kids. Maybe that helped them.

My mum couldn't believe I still was a virgin. Then again AFAIK she waited till she was married too and has never cheated. Must run in the family this kinda thing. Prior to our chat (when she found out) we never discussed anything related to it.
Btw I'm not prude or anything. Me and my girlfriend get up to some... stuff. Just not full stuff. (no devil smiley)

MrSmith
Aug 25, 2008, 12:23 PM
Fixed it :).

BTW this discussion is just interesting.
The only thing more annoying than a virgin is a politically-correct virgin. :rolleyes:

pseudobrit
Aug 25, 2008, 12:24 PM
So the real message here is be loose and immoral? Society - for some apparently unknown and curious reason - managed to survive and even flourish for thousands of years whilst maintaining a strong set of morals (and until only recently - last 50 years or so - it was the common vagrant classes that slept around so freely). Morals have only declined since the 20th century and more so than ever since the 60s. To move in with someone and sleep with people gratuitously would be frowned upon even 50 years ago - it was viewed as shameful and out-of-the-ordinary.

Your lack of historical perspective is staggering.

The fact that one possesses strong enough will power to avoid casual sex doesn't make them a prude, doesn't make them any less 'good' a person. It simply means you've got a higher standard you live by. It means you have virtue, not a meaningless set of 'personal values.' ("I only sleep with 5 different people a week" isn't virtue. It personal values... there's a difference)

And just because someone has different values than you do doesn't mean they've got lesser standards or virtue.

Mord
Aug 25, 2008, 12:25 PM
So the real message here is be loose and immoral? Society - for some apparently unknown and curious reason - managed to survive and even flourish for thousands of years whilst maintaining a strong set of morals (and until only recently - last 50 years or so - it was the common vagrant classes that slept around so freely). Morals have only declined since the 20th century and more so than ever since the 60s. To move in with someone and sleep with people gratuitously would be frowned upon even 50 years ago - it was viewed as shameful and out-of-the-ordinary. I don't call the change in recent years as simply being more intellectually advanced, I call that a decline in self discipline and moral judgement.

The fact that one possesses strong enough will power to avoid casual sex doesn't make them a prude, doesn't make them any less 'good' a person. It simply means you've got a higher standard you live by. It means you have virtue, not a meaningless set of 'personal values.' ("I only sleep with 5 different people a week" isn't virtue. It personal values... there's a difference)


Why on earth should anyone be proud of a strategy that will inevitably lead to a higher level of dissatisfaction in life? Sexual compatibility isn't a guaranteed thing. How would you feel if upon your wedding night you realise that neither of you does anything for the other? It simply makes sense to test the waters, it doesn't make sex any less special to do so in fact I'm adamant that it makes it more so.

Everyone has their kinks, my sexual compatibility with my partner is a large reason why we're so besotted with each other. I've had relationships sour purely due to sexual incompatibility and it's not fun to deal with the fallout.

sushi
Aug 25, 2008, 12:26 PM
BTW this discussion is just interesting.
Agree.

Very interesting due to the broad range of perspectives on the issue.

MrSmith
Aug 25, 2008, 12:28 PM
...Everyone has their kinks, my sexual compatibility with my partner is a large reason why we're so besotted with each other.Yeah, that's kinda not going to last, you know...

Your lack of historical perspective is staggering.
I think you're (deliberately?) missing the point.

northy124
Aug 25, 2008, 12:30 PM
The only thing more annoying than a virgin is a politically-correct virgin. :rolleyes:

Where did I say I was a virgin? If you read back and find my post I'll of said I'm not one and I wished I wasn't drunk at the time:(.

Mord
Aug 25, 2008, 12:31 PM
Yeah, that's kinda not going to last, you know...

Those I know in similar D/S relationships certainly seem to last.

vniow
Aug 25, 2008, 12:33 PM
Nothing better than a Monday morning argument about sex while I stay at home with various electrodes stuck to my abdomen. Fun fun.


So the real message here is be loose and immoral?


Um, what? Did you just define my own sexual morals for me? Who are you to decide what is considered proper, or right or moral? I'm going off of the range of human existence here, not within the last few hundred years of one simple and accepted form of sexuality. And what exactly is wrong with being loose? Wouldn't it enable the baby (the eventual goal I assume) to come out easier?



Society - for some apparently unknown and curious reason - managed to survive and even flourish for thousands of years whilst maintaining a strong set of morals (and until only recently - last 50 years or so - it was the common vagrant classes that slept around so freely).

Are you serious? You really think that society has had the same morals we did from 50-60 years ago back to the beginnings of civilisation? What planet do you live on? For one, not all society is Western in mentality and origin, and second, humanity itself has gone through many phases in what it considers proper sexuality even within the same sects of culture. Our culture if based off of the Greeks and Romans right? I'll bet you things were a bit different back then.



Morals have only declined since the 20th century and more so than ever since the 60s. To move in with someone and sleep with people gratuitously would be frowned upon even 50 years ago - it was viewed as shameful and out-of-the-ordinary. I don't call the change in recent years as simply being more intellectually advanced, I call that a decline in self discipline and moral judgement.

Blah blah, the 50s were the greatest decade ever, blah blah, white picket fences...blah...everything "immoral" or even questionably so pushed under the rug and not dealt with or discussed, blah.


The fact that one possesses strong enough will power to avoid casual sex doesn't make them a prude, doesn't make them any less 'good' a person. It simply means you've got a higher standard you live by.


Again, you're creating a standards hierarchy where none exists. The only ones which do are personal ones among each individual. What exactly makes you think that someone who avoids casual sex has higher standards than others which don't? Not everyone who has casual sex does it in a dark alley behind a bar with no protection. Your idea that this sort of standard exists contributes to your idea that people who avoid casual sex are "less good", which is quite simply wrong.


It means you have virtue, not a meaningless set of 'personal values.' ("I only sleep with 5 different people a week" isn't virtue. It personal values... there's a difference)

Who cares about virtue? Seriously, does anyone really give a ****? That's a concept which originated out of the dark ages for ****s sake. The same people who value virtue in regards to virginity are the same people who like to sweep every other form of sexuality beyond vanilla heterosexual sex within marriage (or at least people who are engaged). They wonder why modern day morals have seemed to waste away, its because their definition of a proper sexuality was simply wrong! When you ignore and/or demoralise every other form of sexuality except for one specific kind, you're going to have problems. People are going to be afraid to talk about it. People are going to to start becoming ashamed about things they have no reason to be. People are not going to feel that its their choice what kind of sexuality they end up embracing as they mature. You want to talk about personal values? My personal values are as such; to explore my sexuality to the extent of my emotional and physical limits until I perish. You want to call that immoral or lacking in virtue...well, you're wrong.



Good post. It used to be we listened to and respected what our parents said. Now we just do what we want and **** 'em. Is society better or worse for it? That's the question all adults, especially parents, need to ask themselves.


Yes, because all of our parents talked to us openly about sex. If you can find a way to listen to collective silence then I shall award you a patent in doing so.

vniow
Aug 25, 2008, 12:34 PM
My mum couldn't believe I still was a virgin.

I believe you.


Yeah, that's kinda not going to last, you know...

http://www.australiannews.net/story/398641

pseudobrit
Aug 25, 2008, 12:34 PM
I think you're (deliberately?) missing the point.

What? That humankind was a shining emblem of virtue and restraint until the 1960s?

leekohler
Aug 25, 2008, 12:34 PM
Why on earth should anyone be proud of a strategy that will inevitably lead to a higher level of dissatisfaction in life? Sexual compatibility isn't a guaranteed thing. How would you feel if upon your wedding night you realise that neither of you does anything for the other? It simply makes sense to test the waters, it doesn't make sex any less special to do so in fact I'm adamant that it makes it more so.

Everyone has their kinks, my sexual compatibility with my partner is a large reason why we're so besotted with each other. I've had relationships sour purely due to sexual incompatibility and it's not fun to deal with the fallout.

Don't forget you're talking to a US audience here. Ideas about sex are quite varied.

Remember, show a breast being caressed and the movie is rated X, show it being cut off and it's rated R. We have some seriously messed up values here.

sushi
Aug 25, 2008, 12:35 PM
Yeah, that's kinda not going to last, you know...
The unfortunate truth it seems.

My wife is the first person that I have been with in my life, that I don't care if we have sex or not. That is not to say, we don't have sex or that it is not fun. We do, it's fun, and we both enjoy it. :D

But there are so many other things about her that enchant and make me want to be with her, that sex is like the having desert with a cherry on top. Don't need the cherry to enjoy the desert, but it's nice to have.

Many years ago, I would have never dreamed that I would have this perspective when some older friends alluded to it. Now I see what they meant.

I hope this makes sense.

MrSmith
Aug 25, 2008, 12:35 PM
Where did I say I was a virgin? If you read back and find my post I'll of said I'm not one and I wished I wasn't drunk at the time:(.
My mistake. You just sounded like a David Brent character: "...or her life." Or was it Monty Python? Whatever, we know women are human, too.

Melrose
Aug 25, 2008, 12:38 PM
There now. I knew that would get me quoted a few more times. :D

The point is, do what you want - I'm not trying to define your morals for you - but morals have gone downhill in the 50-100 years. Period. I respect that you define morality differently, but whether or not the viewpoint is correct is a matter of debate. Period.

@MrSmith: I can't figger out whether you last post there was sarcastic or serious?

Dagless
Aug 25, 2008, 12:40 PM
Why on earth should anyone be proud of a strategy that will inevitably lead to a higher level of dissatisfaction in life? Sexual compatibility isn't a guaranteed thing. How would you feel if upon your wedding night you realise that neither of you does anything for the other? It simply makes sense to test the waters, it doesn't make sex any less special to do so in fact I'm adamant that it makes it more so.

Because of talking, knowing the other person? I wonder if full intercourse will work between me and my girlfriend, physically as well as mentally/what we expect and such. But that doesn't matter so much because where stand now we have a great time together. If sex works=great. If it doesn't we've got our current fumblings to fall back on.
I don't even think the strict catholic folk who wait until marriage never talk about sex and what they expect on the night. And from the catholic folk I know - those who do wait until marriage fill their boots in the million of other nekkid ways one can show love to another person.

But also... Where is the line drawn? If my girlfriend becomes a lesbian does that mean she automatically loses her virginity going off events in our hetero relationship?

sushi
Aug 25, 2008, 12:40 PM
Nothing better than a Monday morning argument about sex while I stay at home with various electrodes stuck to my abdomen. Fun fun.
For me, it's early Tuesday morning (about 0230) and the pain in my knee is keeping me awake.

Dang injuries. :)

vniow
Aug 25, 2008, 12:41 PM
Remember, show a breast being caressed and the movie is rated X, show it being cut off and it's rated R. We have some seriously messed up values here.



Heh heh, you said caressed and breast.

Mord
Aug 25, 2008, 12:43 PM
Don't forget you're talking to a US audience here. Ideas about sex are quite varied.

Remember, show a breast being caressed and the movie is rated X, show it being cut off and it's rated R. We have some seriously messed up values here.

Oh I know, I fully realise that my own lifestyle's on the extreme end of things but everyone has their sexual fantasies, whether it's light roleplay or hardcore bondage if you repress that side of you it'll just drive you dementia or even to satisfying your fetish in secret with others due to of fear of judgement from your loved one.

sushi
Aug 25, 2008, 12:48 PM
OT: Mord, like your 'tar. Did you design that yourself?

leekohler
Aug 25, 2008, 12:48 PM
Oh I know, I fully realise that my own lifestyle's on the extreme end of things but everyone has their sexual fantasies, whether it's light roleplay or hardcore bondage if you repress that side of you it'll just drive you dementia or even to satisfying your fetish in secret with others due to of fear of judgement from your loved one.

That's funny. I know lots of people like you. :) I thought you all were fairly common. I guess I've just been in the city too long. I can't remember what the burbs were like anymore. Thank god for that.

vniow
Aug 25, 2008, 12:49 PM
But that doesn't matter so much because where stand now we have a great time together. If sex works=great. If it doesn't we've got our current fumblings to fall back on.

Woah there, don't assume that sex isn't an important part of a relationship, many couples fall apart because they desire different things in that area. I wouldn't place too much stock on previous feelings once you two start becoming more sexually active. Sex changes things, and the more you explore yourself and your partner's sexuality, the clearer you'll be about what you really want. Hopefully it is something she can provide you, but don't be too surprised if sexual incompatibilities cause strain later on in the relationship since you don't yet know what those are.

But also... Where is the line drawn? If my girlfriend becomes a lesbian does that mean she automatically loses her virginity going off events in our relationship?

Wait, what....why would her being a rug muncher have anything to do with her virginity?

MrSmith
Aug 25, 2008, 12:49 PM
@MrSmith: I can't figger out whether you last post there was sarcastic or serious?
The "Good post..." one was serious since I went on to agree with you.

Mord
Aug 25, 2008, 12:49 PM
Because of talking, knowing the other person? I wonder if full intercourse will work between me and my girlfriend, physically as well as mentally/what we expect and such. But that doesn't matter so much because where stand now we have a great time together. If sex works=great. If it doesn't we've got our current fumblings to fall back on.
I don't even think the strict catholic folk who wait until marriage never talk about sex and what they expect on the night. And from the catholic folk I know - those who do wait until marriage fill their boots in the million of other nekkid ways one can show love to another person.

But also... Where is the line drawn? If my girlfriend becomes a lesbian does that mean she automatically loses her virginity going off events in our hetero relationship?

While talking and having a good knowledge of someone is certainly very helpful it's no substitute for practical experience IMO.

As for her virginity I suppose that depends on whether you've shoved a hand up there or not :P

vniow
Aug 25, 2008, 12:52 PM
That's funny. I know lots of people like you. :)


I do too. :)


At Folsom Street Fair 2007:

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2401/1508650039_2b51e70fd2.jpg (http://flickr.com/photos/vniow/1508650039/)


Fun times.


I thought you all were fairly common. I guess I've just been in the city too long. I can't remember what the burbs were like anymore. Thank god for that.

I can't either, I haven't been out of the greater Bay Area in a few years. Everyone I know who has says its a different world once you get outside the metropolitan limits. Eek.

northy124
Aug 25, 2008, 12:53 PM
My mistake. You just sounded like a David Brent character: "...or her life." Or was it Monty Python? Whatever, we know women are human, too.

That's OK, & glad to know you know women are human LoL

MrSmith
Aug 25, 2008, 12:55 PM
What kind of people are we talking?

Melrose
Aug 25, 2008, 12:55 PM
The "Good post..." one was serious since I went on to agree with you.

I see. Thx :cool: These forums make it so dang hard to figure out sometimes, you know?

Dagless
Aug 25, 2008, 12:59 PM
Woah there, don't assume that sex isn't an important part of a relationship, many couples fall apart because they desire different things in that area. I wouldn't place too much stock on previous feelings once you two start becoming more sexually active. Sex changes things, and the more you explore yourself and your partner's sexuality, the clearer you'll be about what you really want. Hopefully it is something she can provide you, but don't be too surprised if sexual incompatibilities cause strain later on in the relationship since you don't yet know what those are.


Being together 6 years we kinda know each other enough that putting a willy up there isn't going to destroy everything we know about each other. And why should it? If we've done other things that simulate that kinda business then why would swapping x for y cause tension when we're married? It just saves time in the end.
We've gone through worse than something as daft as sexual tension. Even now I'd like to give it a shot and she says no, I still love her and I'm not putting any pressure on her for it. It isn't something that controls either of our lives - just something fun to do in the evenings, and given that we've got further to go I can only imagine good things are going to get better :)
Realises the hilarity of this thread.

MrSmith
Aug 25, 2008, 01:03 PM
Realises the hilarity of this thread.
Me, too.

Mord
Aug 25, 2008, 01:06 PM
What kind of people are we talking?

Special.

OT: Mord, like your 'tar. Did you design that yourself?

Nope, I nabbed it from this page http://www.avatarcorner.com/avatars-psychedelic-85.htm

Some day i'll create one myself with coloured cubes.

leekohler
Aug 25, 2008, 01:07 PM
Being together 6 years we kinda know each other enough that putting a willy up there isn't going to destroy everything we know about each other. And why should it? If we've done other things that simulate that kinda business then why would swapping x for y cause tension when we're married? It just saves time in the end.
We've gone through worse than something as daft as sexual tension. Even now I'd like to give it a shot and she says no, I still love her and I'm not putting any pressure on her for it. It isn't something that controls my life.
Realises the hilarity of this thread.

Of course. I think what vniow is trying to say is that everyone is different. There is no one way to do anything, nor any one way to live your life well. It depends on the person. Some people don't care about sex much. Others like it a lot. So why do people think that the same rules apply to all relationships?

iJohnHenry
Aug 25, 2008, 01:12 PM
At Folsom Street Fair 2007:

Fun times.

Certainly from the rest of the pics in your album. :eek:

Did you intend to make them all public??

vniow
Aug 25, 2008, 01:15 PM
Certainly from the rest of the pics in your album. :eek:

Did you intend to make them all public??


You should see the private ones.

pseudobrit
Aug 25, 2008, 01:26 PM
The point is, do what you want - I'm not trying to define your morals for you - but morals have gone downhill in the 50-100 years. Period. I respect that you define morality differently, but whether or not the viewpoint is correct is a matter of debate. Period.

People have always been doing the same things they do now. You just don't know about it, so you idealize the past.

And even 50-100 years ago, in the thick of this virtuous society you envision, people were sure that morals had decayed horribly in the past two generations. Plus a change and all that.

Prof.
Aug 25, 2008, 01:31 PM
I have a question! Why is it when ppl talk about sex in the US ppl are like "OMG sex! We don't talk about that" but in other places of the world it's not that of a big deal? Are Americans that immature when it comes to sex?

vniow
Aug 25, 2008, 01:33 PM
Are Americans that immature when it comes to sex?


Yes.

NC MacGuy
Aug 25, 2008, 01:38 PM
Summer of 1974

Melrose
Aug 25, 2008, 01:39 PM
People have always been doing the same things they do now. You just don't know about it, so you idealize the past.

I see. And that means the reason you know I'm wrong is that you've been around for the last three thousand years and know differently? I'm sorry, but simply changing the subject by suggesting I'm not a student of history doesn't really prove anyone's viewpoint.

204467
Aug 25, 2008, 01:46 PM
I know what you're saying. I can talk about anything, too. But here I think the OP is just embarrassing himself.

How am I embarrassing myself?

I lost my virginity at 175.

Pounds, that is. I had been obese from childhood, and it wasn't until I had lost weight and I was 175 pounds that I lost my virginity in any way. I was also 18 years old, but I think that is less significant in my story.

Interesting way to look at it. Good for you that you lost that weight!

Yeah, that's kinda not going to last, you know...

He said that a large part of their relationship was based on sex, however, I'm sure a significant part is based on other things. I don't care how much you love someone for who they are, everyone gets horny sometimes. If you can't enjoy sex together, then that's going to be a big flaw in your relationship.

Don't forget you're talking to a US audience here. Ideas about sex are quite varied.

Remember, show a breast being caressed and the movie is rated X, show it being cut off and it's rated R. We have some seriously messed up values here.

It's so pathetic, isn't it. I really hate this country sometimes.

I have a question! Why is it when ppl talk about sex in the US ppl are like "OMG sex! We don't talk about that" but in other places of the world it's not that of a big deal? Are Americans that immature when it comes to sex?

Unfortunately, yes. That's just how immature people in this country are. Unfortunately, many of the people with the mindset you talked about are old and won't change how they think.

leekohler
Aug 25, 2008, 01:54 PM
I see. And that means the reason you know I'm wrong is that you've been around for the last three thousand years and know differently? I'm sorry, but simply changing the subject by suggesting I'm not a student of history doesn't really prove anyone's viewpoint.

Please tell me you're joking. You made an incorrect assertion. You got called on it. Relax.


He said that a large part of their relationship was based on sex, however, I'm sure a significant part is based on other things. I don't care how much you love someone for who they are, everyone gets horny sometimes. If you can't enjoy sex together, then that's going to be a big flaw in your relationship.


Mord is a female, FYI. ;)

kretzy
Aug 25, 2008, 01:59 PM
I see. And that means the reason you know I'm wrong is that you've been around for the last three thousand years and know differently? I'm sorry, but simply changing the subject by suggesting I'm not a student of history doesn't really prove anyone's viewpoint.

Um last time I checked, history was full of people screwing around left, right and centre.

Melrose
Aug 25, 2008, 02:03 PM
Please tell me you're joking. You made an incorrect assertion. You got called on it. Relax.

My only point is don't shout down someone if you don't have the experience or references to prove it. The fact is that neither of us have such experience, so the point of questioning whether or not my viewpoint was correct based solely on that doesn't hold much water. If it can be otherwise proved using references and historical data I'm more than open to reading that material and increasing my knowledge, but simply based assumption, nope.

I realize people have been doing this for ages - what I said originally was that only recently has it become socially acceptable the last little while.

That is all.

arkitect
Aug 25, 2008, 02:05 PM
I see. And that means the reason you know I'm wrong is that you've been around for the last three thousand years and know differently? I'm sorry, but simply changing the subject by suggesting I'm not a student of history doesn't really prove anyone's viewpoint.

"Sexual intercourse began
In nineteen sixty-three
(Which was rather late for me)
Between the end of the Chatterley ban
And the Beatles first LP."
Philip Larkin
You do realise that is actually not true
;)

darkwing
Aug 25, 2008, 02:29 PM
the op probably thinks hes "cool" since he lost it at 15 when he was a child and wants to tell everyone how much of a "man" he is lol

personally, i believe if you dont have the means to support any consequences of your decisions, you shouldnt be engaging in the practice

This is the most intelligent thing I've ever seen written on this forum. Thanks for restoring some of my faith in humanity.

leekohler
Aug 25, 2008, 02:30 PM
My only point is don't shout down someone if you don't have the experience or references to prove it. The fact is that neither of us have such experience, so the point of questioning whether or not my viewpoint was correct based solely on that doesn't hold much water. If it can be otherwise proved using references and historical data I'm more than open to reading that material and increasing my knowledge, but simply based assumption, nope.

I realize people have been doing this for ages - what I said originally was that only recently has it become socially acceptable the last little while.

That is all.

And that's utterly false. Have you never heard of the Roaring 20's? Ever seen porn from that period (yes, it existed, quite a bit of it too)? You would probably be shocked about what was going on back then publicly. Just about anything went back then, and that's fairly recent. Historically, sexual mores and norms have changed quiet drastically through time. There isn't anything going on today that hasn't been going on forever. It's all been out in the open before too. We certainly aren't the first.

DigiCatRedux
Aug 25, 2008, 02:40 PM
Is 18 years old considered "late to the party" nowdays? Oh well, no complaints- at least since then, I've had a fairly healthy sex life.

Interesting book about sex & why we have it I ran across a while back, by author Matt Ridley: "The Red Queen: Sex & the evolution of human nature".
Highly recommended read for those interested.

vniow
Aug 25, 2008, 03:32 PM
Please tell me you're joking. You made an incorrect assertion. You got called on it. Relax.



This ladies and gentlemen, is what is known on the internets as "getting pwned".

204467
Aug 25, 2008, 04:27 PM
Please tell me you're joking. You made an incorrect assertion. You got called on it. Relax.



Mord is a female, FYI. ;)

Oops. I didn't know. Thanks for telling me. And sorry, Mord for mistaking your gender.

leekohler
Aug 25, 2008, 04:40 PM
This ladies and gentlemen, is what is known on the internets as "getting pwned".

Nah- just a friendly correction, that's all. ;)

vniow
Aug 25, 2008, 04:51 PM
Nah- just a friendly correction, that's all. ;)



I know, I was itching for an excuse to use the word "pwned" and that was all I could find.

sushi
Aug 25, 2008, 06:52 PM
Being together 6 years we kinda know each other enough that putting a willy up there isn't going to destroy everything we know about each other.
I would think that once two people go on to that level, the relationship will change by becoming better.

The key is do what is right for you two. Others do what is right for them.

Nope, I nabbed it from this page http://www.avatarcorner.com/avatars-psychedelic-85.htm

Some day i'll create one myself with coloured cubes.
Cool. Thanks. :)

Of course. I think what vniow is trying to say is that everyone is different. There is no one way to do anything, nor any one way to live your life well. It depends on the person. Some people don't care about sex much. Others like it a lot. So why do people think that the same rules apply to all relationships?
Well put and agree.

Are Americans that immature when it comes to sex?
I wouldn't say immature but rather different. Having lived in different places in the world, cultures are different plain and simple. They have their own standards.

One thing I find funny here in Japan, is that if they show the female private area in a magazine, it is xxx'ed out or hair is filled in so that you cannot see the subject matter. Yet, if you take a look at their comic books, they show everything in complete, and I mean complete, detail. Same with their anime and figurines. Yet, the US is basically the opposite. Funny.

Um last time I checked, history was full of people screwing around left, right and centre.
Kind of how we (mankind) got here, me thinks. ;)

Have you never heard of the Roaring 20's? Ever seen porn from that period (yes, it existed, quite a bit of it too)? You would probably be shocked about what was going on back then publicly.
:)

I know, I was itching for an excuse to use the word "pwned" and that was all I could find.
:)

Iscariot
Aug 25, 2008, 07:55 PM
I am not a prude by no means but what is wrong with being proud of this?

The problem isn't that you are proud of it, it's the attitude of superiority that comes with pride. Example:

So the real message here is be loose and immoral?

(and until only recently - last 50 years or so - it was the common vagrant classes that slept around so freely). Morals have only declined since the 20th century and more so than ever since the 60s.

The fact that one possesses strong enough will power to avoid casual sex doesn't make them a prude, doesn't make them any less 'good' a person. It simply means you've got a higher standard you live by. It means you have virtue, not a meaningless set of 'personal values.'

The point is, do what you want - I'm not trying to define your morals for you - but morals have gone downhill in the 50-100 years. Period. I respect that you define morality differently, but whether or not the viewpoint is correct is a matter of debate. Period.

As a matter of fact Melrose, the last fifty to sixty years has seen the greatest increase in standards of living, education and medicine around the globe. I would say an increase in sharing medicine, food, and technology and a decrease in murder, theft and war would mean that "morals" have actually improved significantly. You claim you're not trying to define "your morals for you" but you are drawing a very clear picture of what morals are, and how the rest of us who don't follow your strict definition are immoral. 50-100 years ago blacks weren't allowed to vote and were routinely lynched, women had fewer rights, we had two world wars that killed close to a hundred million people, and yet we're all less moral now because we have more sex?

I made a plea earlier for people to stop politicizing this thread and start respecting other peoples rights and choices. Now I direct that at you, Melrose. You are attempting to belittle everyone who has made a different choice than you.

2nyRiggz
Aug 25, 2008, 08:36 PM
I don't see anything wrong with this thread given we've had a thread on a MacBook Pro damaged by female juices recently. :D


I'm glad I missed that thread and ewww....


Bless

jaikob
Aug 25, 2008, 09:43 PM
I was 18, nearly 19, with my one and only partner. I am not ashamed to admit that I wasn't prepared for the emotional roller coaster that sex introduced. She and I are 24 and will get married when school finally ends for both of us.

Good for you! I am way younger than you, but me and my Girlfriend, plan on doing the same thing. It will be our 4 year anniversary soon, and we plan on staying together. she was my first GF, and I was her first BF :)

PS to All: Why So Serious?

Had to be Said.

TuffLuffJimmy
Aug 25, 2008, 10:04 PM
Good for you! I am way younger than you, but me and my Girlfriend, plan on doing the same thing. It will be our 4 year anniversary soon, and we plan on staying together. she was my first GF, and I was her first BF :)

PS to All: Why So Serious?

Had to be Said.

PS: Everyone needs to stop quoting that movie!!!

kabunaru
Aug 25, 2008, 10:07 PM
I am an male and never lost my virginity.

pseudobrit
Aug 25, 2008, 10:59 PM
I see. And that means the reason you know I'm wrong is that you've been around for the last three thousand years and know differently? I'm sorry, but simply changing the subject by suggesting I'm not a student of history doesn't really prove anyone's viewpoint.

If you don't know history you don't have perspective, you have a single point in time and no references to where you are or how you got there.

You have this notion that things were different in the past that has no basis in history. For thousands of years there were countless civilizations who were much more open and tolerant of sexual promiscuity than the United States is today and your assertions to the contrary show a completely inaccurate grasp of the history of sexuality.

Today's prudishness is a relatively recent phenomenon. Even the Old Testament contains erotic chapters.

How do you think the human population got to where it is? Whole lotta shakin' goin' on.

jaikob
Aug 25, 2008, 11:06 PM
PS: Everyone needs to stop quoting that movie!!!

Would you like to see a magic trick?

mixmacface
Aug 25, 2008, 11:12 PM
i'm 19, 20 in october. . plan to wait until marriage. i'm saving myself for wild, passionate, awkward, honeymoon sex. it's going to be grrreat. ha!

Would you like to see a magic trick?
+1

SkyBell
Aug 25, 2008, 11:50 PM
Haven't yet, don't plan to for, at the very least, another two or three years.

McGarvels
Aug 26, 2008, 12:24 AM
50-100 years ago blacks weren't allowed to vote and were routinely lynched, women had fewer rights, we had two world wars that killed close to a hundred million people, and yet we're all less moral now because we have more sex?

I made a plea earlier for people to stop politicizing this thread and start respecting other peoples rights and choices. Now I direct that at you, Melrose. You are attempting to belittle everyone who has made a different choice than you.

You are my hero :D

Plymouthbreezer
Aug 26, 2008, 12:31 AM
Heh, interesting thread.

Anyway, I think it's unfortunate that so many young - like 14-15 - yearolds are having sex, now-a-days more than ever. At that age, can one really know what sex... well, what sex actually means? I think not. :rolleyes: