How can I just be nice?

[MacAndy74]

Today this guy approached me at work, really excited and happy - saying how happy he was that he purchased a brand new iPod. Excitedly I asked which one he purchased - if it was the really awesome iPod Touch.

What followed was an awkward moment, the guy shows me he's purchased an iPod Classic; secretly I really don't like their design and I'd buy an iPod Touch or even an iPod Nano over an iPod Classic anytime.

So I smiled awkwardly and without thinking, said (in just as awkward way) 'Hey, yeah - gee hmm! ... There it is!' What followed was about 10 seconds of amazingly awkward silence as I prayed my phone would ring or some calamity that would take this awkward situation away - would eventuate. Nothing. Damn.

Then he said something like, 'yeah, isn't is a great screen'. I had to bite my lip.. The screen is so fricken small, all I could think of was ... iPod Touch.

Phone rang. Pretended it was something really really important (all this happened at work), I waved - grinned awkwardly and walked ... very quickly, away.

Wish I wasn't so damn well opinionated. I feel like such a bitch. :rolleyes:

[annk]

Why not just focus on the guy's happiness, and feel the good vibes coming from him? He chose a new gadget and is really pleased with it - so much so that he wants to share his happiness.

I think maybe you're making it too much about you, about what YOU think is nice. The focus here should be on him and the fact that he was so happy, and that he wanted to share that with you. There are so many complainers in the world; we should enjoy it when someone's happy.

Just a thought, maybe it will make it easier next time round.

[yoyo5280]

Wow, all that over an iPod?

Some people buy the classic cause....ITS CLASSIC! Holds many songs, has the original design (I love) and is a good solid option.

You could of easily said "Wow its great how many songs it holds! My iPod touch can't hold 80gb...but I like the screen size you know?"

To which he will reply "This one is nice enough for me."

Awkward moment over... Right?


-omi5280

[arkitect]

*snip* a rather sad story

Better luck next time… just bear in mind that people's priorities and expectations in life are different.

There is a lesson in there for you.
But I think you know that already.

;)

[MacAndy74]

Why not just focus on the guy's happiness, and feel the good vibes coming from him? He chose a new gadget and is really pleased with it - so much so that he wants to share his happiness.

I think maybe you're making it too much about you, about what YOU think is nice. The focus here should be on him and the fact that he was so happy, and that he wanted to share that with you. There are so many complainers in the world; we should enjoy it when someone's happy.

Just a thought, maybe it will make it easier next time round.

Yes. Great advice. I think I was concentrating on the wrong aspect of it all. Rather than look at things from my point of view, I should look at how someone feel's about their new gadget and be happy for them.

Sometimes it's just not easy, not to be critical or be happy when work demands get crazy. :(

@ arkitect I've been learned. :) Sometimes my sense of self importance is far far over embellished.

[windywoo]

Just say, "Thats pretty good, I've got one too."

Then show him yours and make him feel jealous. Of course if he's happy with his purchase, he won't be jealous so no wrong has been done on your part. If he's green with envy, you have showed him the error of his ways and he will take that classic back.

[zen]

Today this guy approached me at work, really excited and happy - saying how happy he was that he purchased a brand new iPod. Excitedly I asked which one he purchased - if it was the really awesome iPod Touch.

What followed was an awkward moment, the guy shows me he's purchased an iPod Classic; secretly I really don't like their design and I'd buy an iPod Touch or even an iPod Nano over an iPod Classic anytime.

So I smiled awkwardly and without thinking, said (in just as awkward way) 'Hey, yeah - gee hmm! ... There it is!' What followed was about 10 seconds of amazingly awkward silence as I prayed my phone would ring or some calamity that would take this awkward situation away - would eventuate. Nothing. Damn.

Then he said something like, 'yeah, isn't is a great screen'. I had to bite my lip.. The screen is so fricken small, all I could think of was ... iPod Touch.

Phone rang. Pretended it was something really really important (all this happened at work), I waved - grinned awkwardly and walked ... very quickly, away.

Wish I wasn't so damn well opinionated. I feel like such a bitch. :rolleyes:

Yeah, I wonder why you can't just be nice.

What a strange reaction - the iPod classic is great, it holds a tonne more than the touch, and yes, the screen IS great. Your friend is excited enough to show it to you, so show some frakkin' interest.

Heck, I've had friends getting excited because they've bought an iPod shuffle! Sure, I don't want one myself, but I share their enthusiasm for a new cool purchase and can happily spend a few minutes waffling about how neat it is.

You're not being opinionated, you're being a snob.

[annk]

Just say, "Thats pretty good, I've got one too."

Then show him yours and make him feel jealous. Of course if he's happy with his purchase, he won't be jealous so no wrong has been done on your part. If he's green with envy, you have showed him the error of his ways and he will take that classic back.

Man, way to kill someone's happiness. :( Why would you want to take away his pleasure in his new toy?

You're not being opinionated, you're being a snob.

Do you really think so? In his second post he said he now thinks he was looking at it the wrong way. Doesn't sound like a snob to me, it sounds like someone who was uncomfortable with his own reaction and wanted to reflect about it with people here.

[Dagless]

What, eh? The Classic is a fantastic iPod, it's just not a PDA-iPod like the iPod Touch. And all that storage space. If I could have any iPod I'd still go for the Classic (its the only Apple branded MP3 player that could store all my music and enough video for good times). And doesn't it have an awesomely long battery life? I have a 5.5G so I don't know (with more storage than any Touch :p).

[MacAndy74]

Just say, "Thats pretty good, I've got one too."

Then show him yours and make him feel jealous. Of course if he's happy with his purchase, he won't be jealous so no wrong has been done on your part. If he's green with envy, you have showed him the error of his ways and he will take that classic back.

:) A plan, I like it. You see the other side of the story is that this particular person is an especially caustic and annoying person at work, at times. Which is why. At the time. Mild ambivalence was the best I could muster.

Yeah, I wonder why you can't just be nice.

What a strange reaction (..) Your friend is excited enough to show it to you, so show some frakkin' interest.

You're not being opinionated, you're being a snob.

Ok you misunderstood me somewhat, this is no friend but an ordinarily caustic and annoying 'client' who himself is so high and righteous at times, it's ridiculous.

(..) Doesn't sound like a snob to me, it sounds like someone who was uncomfortable with his own reaction and wanted to reflect about it with people here.

I'd like to believe that myself. It's just when someone who is always such a git ordinarily, is suddenly approachable and happy; then with my personal mixed feelings about the iPod Classic - it becomes an awkward situation.

[windywoo]

Man, way to kill someone's happiness. :( Why would you want to take away his pleasure in his new toy?


But if he's really happy with it then he won't lose any pleasure from it. If he made a hastey decision without seeing all the options then you have just informed him of an option he didn't know he had.

[maflynn]

Why not share the guy's excitement and joy. Just because the device isn't to your liking doesn't mean its any less for him?

Not to sound too critical but I'd rather build up then tear down, if he's happy that he got a classic and he's loving it awesome.

How'd you feel if you showed off your new iPhone to someone but they just shrugged their shoulders and thought it was "ok" but you should have gotten the pre. You'd think the guy a downer and a jerk.

[heehee]

I think I'm a nice guy, most of the time anyway. :p

This is what I do, "Treat others as you want to be treated". :)

[Abstract]

Same thing has happened to me, although not involving any items. Sometimes we're just caught off guard, and our reaction isn't really reflective of our typical selves.


One time, at a dinner, someone decided that I should give a farewell speech for two friends who were moving away soon. I was taken a bit by surprise, so after spending 60 seconds on what to say (and being nervous for 61 of those seconds), I pretty much said, "Well....uh.....it has been great to get to know you both. I know we'll see each other again......or not, I suppose." That's not what I meant at all, but it all happened a bit fast. I heard someone else tell another person something about me acting indifferent to their farewell, which only made me feel a bit worse about it. :o


Anyway, I'm sure you know the right thing to do and say in that situation. You just happened to eff up this time. Everybody has reacted a bit strangely before, and I'm not sure how people here can't understand that perhaps this is out of character for the OP. :confused:

[dukebound85]

just be like this

http://www.adultswim.com/video/?episodeID=8a25c39215cc1d860115ce8fcc6a0028

[itommyboy]

Or next time just point, laugh, walk away. No awkward moment.

[nobunaga209]

Funny cube tale...:p

[niuniu]

I just found out that eventuate is a word, so I'm good

[Blue Velvet]

Sometimes we're just caught off guard, and our reaction isn't really reflective of our typical selves.


Truer words have never been spoken... well, in the last few hours, at least. ;)

The smooth surfaces of our outward personalities can be thrown off by many events and processes completely invisible to others, but these do not encapsulate the whole of a person and their actions and attitudes towards others.

[MacAndy74]

Or next time just point, laugh, walk away. No awkward moment.

;) I like your suggestion.

Truer words have never been spoken... well, in the last few hours, at least. ;)

The smooth surfaces of our outward personalities can be thrown off by many events and processes completely invisible to others, but these do not encapsulate the whole of a person and their actions and attitudes towards others.

Yes, sometimes I do surprise myself over how I would normally react. Maybe I should have been myself and said, 'Ok yeah, it's nice - glad you're happy; I'd prefer an iPod Touch, but then we have different needs.' :)

[clevin]

i think I would be honest, IF he is not my supervisor, I would tell him to return it right now and get an better one, in your case, an iPod Touch.

[Macky-Mac]

.....Wish I wasn't so damn well opinionated. I feel like such a bitch. :rolleyes:

oh come on....confess.....you're actually delighted to have pissed in this guy's cornflakes aren't you :D

[MacAndy74]

oh come on....confess.....you're actually delighted to have pissed in this guy's cornflakes aren't you :D

:o a bit, although I don't like the idea of 'an eye for an eye..', thing is the only time this guy even talks to me is either 1) He needs help with his Mac, or 2) He want's to show off with some new toy. Otherwise he's not a 'nice' person.

@ clevin I might do that next time, or maybe when I get my iPhone 3G[S] - I may quite accidentally and innocently show off with it, myself. :p

[dilbert4life]

:) A plan, I like it. You see the other side of the story is that this particular person is an especially caustic and annoying person at work, at times. Which is why. At the time. Mild ambivalence was the best I could muster.

And now, the rest of the story

That would have been important info to read first post. lol

Anyways - yeah - just share his enthusiasm and give him a "put 'er there" to make him fell happy. He was obviously seeking your approval.:apple:

[instaxgirl]

Work in retail for a bit.

After you've spent a few hours telling people that the two clashing prints in unflattering styles they've chosen for themselves look fantastic and go great together you'll have an unwavering ability to plaster a smile across your face and spraff about how wonderful anything is.

Actually I was knackered at work yesterday and let my mask fall for a second when a customer asked if I thought an outfit worked, they didn't look impressed by my incredulous expression . . .

It seems you don't like this guy much, so don't beat yourself up and practice your fake smile for next time ;)

[mscriv]

What a peculiar and funny thread. It's almost like I can see this being a Seinfeld or The Office episode. You know the ominous "proper office etiquette" debate and the ethical dilemma of being nice to someone that you really can't stand. Life is full of these funny little situations. Thanks for sharing and making me laugh at the same time. :)

[MrSmith]

You should have said, "Yeah, those cheap ones are nice".

[sushi]

Why not just focus on the guy's happiness, and feel the good vibes coming from him?<snip great advice.>
Great advice!

OP, you should feel happy that he wanted to shared his joy and excitement with you. All iPods are cool! :)

Once I had a co-worker want to share the joy of his Zune with me. At first I was thinking to myself oh joy. Then I realized that he thought enough of me to want to share his joy. When I opened my mind, I actually found it fun to watch him excitedly share his new joy.

So many cool gadgets out there and so little time to experience them. :)

You should have said, "Yeah, those high capacity ones are nice".
Fixed that for you! :)

[Capt Crunch]

Thank you OP, you just made my day seem incredibly important.

[yojitani]

Actually I was knackered at work yesterday and let my mask fall for a second when a customer asked if I thought an outfit worked, they didn't look impressed by my incredulous expression . . .


I would really appreciate it if floor sales people would be honest. Let's face it, if it's a bad combo the customer is going to find out eventually.

@OP: Even though you don't like the guy, you do have a professional relationship of sorts. You should ask him next time you see him how he's liking the iPod. That'll make up for the awkward conversation.

[sushi]

You should ask him next time you see him how he's liking the iPod. That'll make up for the awkward conversation.
What a nice idea. :)

[Abstract]

Thank you OP, you just made my day seem incredibly important.

"Blah blah blah....blah blah blah blah blah."


Trust me. Your day isn't important.

[designgeek]

Are you an Aries? This sounds like something all the Aries I know would do. If that's the case then there's nothing you can do about it.;)

[conch575]

Just smile, nod your head and say some crap like "I really like that colour" or "They've got good storage space!"
Seriously, it's not that hard to lie! How do you think my friends still like me?? I have to lie and pretend I like the look of the Zune and it "feels nice" in my hand/pocket. :P