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Turning in a family member

BreakGuy

BreakGuy

macrumors 6502a
Original poster
Nov 23, 2009
817
0
NZ, South Pacific
Would you ever turn in a member of your family that you knew was guilty of a crime?

Would you only turn in someone for a serious or felonious crime, such as murder, rape, kidnapping, drug trafficking etc?
 
Innocent until proven guilty.

If I knew they were guilty I would try and persuade them to turn themselves in.

If not, yes I would.
 
BreakGuy said:
Would you ever turn in a member of your family that you knew was guilty of a crime?

Would you only turn in someone for a serious or felonious crime, such as murder, rape, kidnapping, drug trafficking etc?
Click to expand...

Of course, what happens if I turned my back and did nothing and they then did something even worse. I couldn't forgive myself for allowing someone else to get hurt.

As painful as it may be in turning in a family member, it prevents others from getting hurt and perhaps allows the guilty party to seek help and change the course of his/her life.
 
Turn them in, yes.
Be there to support them in their trial and punishment, yes.
Accept them back into my life if they were repentant, yes.
 
Last edited:
maflynn said:
Of course, what happens if I turned my back and did nothing and they then did something even worse. I couldn't forgive myself for allowing someone else to get hurt.

As painful as it may be in turning in a family member, it prevents others from getting hurt and perhaps allows the guilty party to seek help and change the course of his/her life.
Click to expand...

That ^^^ says it for me.

OP asked about serious crime that harms others. As maflynn says, IMO we have a responsibility to protect others if we are aware of a potential foe harm in advance.

A truly horrifying choice to have to make, but I think the correct action is clear.
 
It depends on the crime. Horrible acts against another human being or animal? Yeah, I'm not going to ignore that. Everything else, probably leaving it alone.
 
Everyone out there is guilty of something, even if it's relatively minor like speeding by a tiny amount on the motorways, dropping an apple core in flowers the park (this is littering even if it is biodegradable) etc. So it'd have to be something major.
 
BreakGuy said:
Would you ever turn in a member of your family that you knew was guilty of a crime?

Would you only turn in someone for a serious or felonious crime, such as murder, rape, kidnapping, drug trafficking etc?
Click to expand...

robbieduncan said:
Everyone out there is guilty of something, even if it's relatively minor like speeding by a tiny amount on the motorways, dropping an apple core in flowers the park (this is littering even if it is biodegradable) etc. So it'd have to be something major.
Click to expand...

I believe OP (above) was referring to a serious crime of violence - not dropping an apple core in the flowers in the park. Certainly dropping a dime on a family member, or anyone for that matter, for speeding a tiny amount would be excessively strict behavior. But that was not the behavior to which the OP referred.:)
 
One thing to think about is if your family member was capable of committing such a serious crime, he/she would also be quite prepared to murder YOU
 
Depending on the crime or whether it effected me or not (or could in the future), I would be prepared to turn a blind eye.
 
maflynn said:
Of course, what happens if I turned my back and did nothing and they then did something even worse. I couldn't forgive myself for allowing someone else to get hurt.

As painful as it may be in turning in a family member, it prevents others from getting hurt and perhaps allows the guilty party to seek help and change the course of his/her life.
Click to expand...

Agreed. As difficult as it may be, I would also turn them in.
 
BreakGuy said:
Would you ever turn in a member of your family that you knew was guilty of a crime?

Would you only turn in someone for a serious or felonious crime, such as murder, rape, kidnapping, drug trafficking etc?
Click to expand...

If there was no question that the family member committed one of the crimes above then yes -- absolutely.

However, I think such clarity is rarely the case. If there is any doubt, I think family in general will give the other member the benefit of the doubt and go to great pains to defend and/or cover up a crime.
 
Some people are too scared of a family member to turn them in for anything. Like my friend... Her Dad hits her, but she won't turn him in :( Won't let me or anyone else turn him in either.
 
macquariumguy said:
No way. I might attempt to deal with the situation myself though.
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How might you do that? Telling them that it's not nice to rape and murder? How might you go about being sure that they didn't engage in the behavior in the future?

And what about the victims of your hypothetical family member's crimes. And their loved ones.

No consequences for the perpetrator other than you "dealing" with the situation?

I am not suggesting that turning in a family member would be anything less than devastating to both you and the individual. But the crimes that OP uses as examples are not crimes that lend themselves to a family member "dealing" with the perpetrator.
 
mrsir2009 said:
Some people are too scared of a family member to turn them in for anything. Like my friend... Her Dad hits her, but she won't turn him in :( Won't let me or anyone else turn him in either.
Click to expand...

I knew of a similar case... have you tried finding a contact person she could confide in and help her with it (i am talking of an adult) could be a school consellor.... or something who you know is trustable. :)

BreakGuy said:
Would you only turn in someone for a serious or felonious crime, such as murder, rape, kidnapping, drug trafficking etc?
Click to expand...

For murder,rape,kidnapping definitely, drug trafficking depends on the circumstances etc.
 
Maybe the OP could tell us what kind of crime it was, it's do much easier to judge when you know.
 
It depends on the family member.... sorry just being honest

A cousin, uncle, aunt, etc... I would probably turn in...

Immediate members like Mom, Dad, Brother, Sister probably not.
 
My 1 year old son once stole a toy from the toy store. I have not turned him in.
 
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