It's probably going to look very close to what you'd get with a 4k display "scaled down" to 1440p
This is incorrect, for anyone with decent eyesight.
it still seems to look way better than my 1440p monitor does
As is expected. It's rendering at 137PPI rather than 92PPI (a 'native' 1440p 32" display).
There are two hardware options to improve GPU performance: buy an eGPU, or, as discussed, swap to an M1 Mac mini. In the mean time, disabling transparency should
drastically improve performance. That may or may not be acceptable as a long term solution for you, but it should at least make it more usable until you decide what to do.
Edit: technically there's a third option
possibly. When I used a single 4K display, I had it running at a non-default scaled resolution, and it was almost flawless for me - but I have 64GB of memory. The Mac mini will allocate
up to 1.5GB of memory to the iGPU, but it's not a fixed amount, and there are copious reports of people with the minimum memory (yes I know you have more than the minimum) having issues with scaled resolutions; so a memory upgrade
may also improve your scenario, but I'd put that very much in the
maybe basket.