FIQ (Frequently Imagined Questions)
Q) That's ***** AWESOME - does it actually work?
A) F. Yeah!
Q) Why don't you get your cheap lazy azz down to Rat Shack and do that sh** right?
A). My cheap/lazy azz will be going to Rat Shack tomorrow for just that. Unless of course, I am feeling to lazy. And only if I have any lunch money left.
Q) Why don't you just use a ***** Bluetooth headset?
A) People that talk on these things in public are dorks.
Q) Wait, isn't talking on a giant orange handset from the 70's in public pretty ***** *dorky?
A) No, because it's done with a strong sense of irony like large black framed glasses and trucker hats. You wouldn't understand, you are a ****** dork.
Q) You swear a lot.
A) That's not really a question, ******! Besides, you started it.