Thanks for the reply.
I wasn't using the latest iTunes (was on 12.8.something) but since it wouldn't let me update the iOS otherwise then i had to do that first.
And yes i'm on Windows (7, 64bit, Pro).
This is actually one of the reasons i'm considering moving away from Apple. I've been an iPhone user since 2010 and my wife has had iPhone's since then also and iPad's since and the issues we've had with iTunes is silly. Failed restores, problems updating. The failed restore wasn't even from a bad backup because i made 5 backups just in case (as i was erasing the phone) and using different machines too. When i went to restore it kept saying corrupt backup etc. Eventually it worked after many hours by using one of the 'corrupt' backups. But i'm drifting off topic there. It's just frustrating.