College Leave of Absence

[GrandPhrase]

Hi MR. I am currently a freshman at CMU about halfway thru my first semester. I am thinking about taking a leave of absence, but I don't know if I should take one at this instant or just finish off this semester and go home.

I don't know what to study or what I'm doing and I'm already failing one or two classes because of my natural laziness and lack of motivation. In a way, I'm sort of depressed. I literally just sit in my room about 14 hours a day just listening to music, making music, youtube, trying to get some laughs and only work for about 30 min - 1 hour and sleeping for only like 4 hours.

I feel like I need a break - I only have hip hop on my mind and I don't know if I want to go back to school if I take a break - probably have to or will sometime after taking a rest or from parental "motivation or pressure"

Do college credits last forever or do they expire after a certain number of years? What's the longest leave of absence generally permissible (every college is different i assume but generally?) and what are your personal LOA lengths?

Do you think I should go home now or just finish off the rest of this semester?

I urge you to help me out as I feel "trapped inside a wall" just trying to exist.
Thanks.

Edit: Please stop viewing but not commenting lmao

 

[leenak]

Does your school offer mental health assistance? You need to seek professional help from the sounds of it. It is up to you but if you are failing 2 classes, taking a break and taking care of yourself may be the best thing.

 

[GoCubsGo]

First, people are going to view and not comment because you are here seeking advice that is actually quite serious. It outranks the kids asking where to spend their last paycheck. So try your very best not to dictate how people react to your thread.

When I see people say things that you say I wonder how the hell they got into college in the first place. I had to work pretty hard to get into my school, or so I thought. Maybe times have changed, but I cannot imagine they've changed that much. For someone to be accepted to a college and piss it all away within a matter of weeks seems unfair to someone else who probably really wanted to get in, but that is not within your control totally. I get that.

It sounds to me like you're not ready for college at all and you may very well never be. You're lazy, by your own account, and you only think of music. School is not a good fit for you right now but I question whether or not you could really make something of yourself in the hip hop world if you're naturally lazy. Perhaps the structure of school is useful and you just don't want that structure. In the end, you have to do what is right for you. It would help to talk to someone; there is staff on campus that is likely there for you during these troubled time. Seeking a definite answer from a bunch of forum strangers isn't exactly the best idea.

If I had to give you an answer the best I can do is put it in the form of a personal anecdote. At 18 I was accepted to college and did not go, I started community college because I felt I wasn't ready to leave home (school was 2500 miles away). I wanted the program, but I lost my nerve and I do have a little regret over it but I made the best of it. CC wasn't my thing either, I had a great job (for an 18 year old) and just thought I was awesomesauce. I left CC after about a year and continued to work. Years later I thought that it was time to return. I was focused and had more to lose because I was completely financially responsible for my education now. I pushed hard and completed my BA and my MBA back to back and feel proud and grateful that I decided to take care of business. I also worked full time during that time. I certainly wish I did not have to but that was the only way to pay for school.

The moral, I left college and went back when it felt right. Lucky for me it felt right in my 20's and I didn't waste too much time dicking around. Maybe that's what it will be for you but my issue was not being lazy, that is a trait I simply do not possess. Hopefully you grow out of that because it won't really be useful in the years to come.

Good luck.

 

[leenak]

Well I think often depression can be ignored because there is a stigma attached to it and I don't know if it laziness but I think talking to a professional can help.

I won't share my story but I'll say due to 'issues', I had an F in my sophmore year and it really affected the rest of my school life. I was going through a hard time though. I ended up transferring to a different school because I wanted to pursue something else and it ended up being a good thing for me.

I was recently looking into going back to school yet again (I have a BS/MS) as I really enjoy school and my GPA since I got my BS (which ended up around 3.0) has been in the high 3.9s (nothing below an A-). I was asked about the F I had 15 years ago which astounded me.

 

[Tomorrow]

I am currently a freshman at CMU about halfway thru my first semester. I am thinking about taking a leave of absence...

<snip>

...I feel like I need a break

Okay OP, you want comments, here's mine.

At the very least, you're not ready to be a college student. Being a college student - in earnest - requires you to basically turn your life upside-down for four years or so, doing a ton of stuff that other people want you to do, sticking to schedules other people make for you, all without having anybody at all breathing down your neck about it. And to put it bluntly, you're just not there.

At most, and more likely, you're just not college material. Don't take it as a personal insult, because I don't mean it as such. As a former instructor, I can tell you that not everybody was meant to be a college student. That could mean they aren't smart enough, or they aren't interested enough, or they're too distracted, or whatever - in your case, you sound like you're just too lazy. Again, that's not an insult, that's just who you are (based on your self-description above).

To address your other questions - college credits can and do expire, typically after a set number of years (talk to your faculty advisor). Also, if you really want to take a leave of absence, you should finish out the semester. It's not unheard-of to give a student a break in the middle of a semester, but it's usually due to medical or family emergencies and not a chronic lack of motivation.

I quit college for a year and a half after going for three semesters, and it was painstakingly hard to get motivated to go back once I did - but incredibly easy for me to stay enrolled once I did re-enroll.

 

[Macky-Mac]

you should check to see if your school will actually allow you to take a leave of absence without successfully completing at least one full term.

Also schools tend to have a time limit during which you are allowed to drop classes. If you're past that date you may find your only option is to finish the course or take a fail for not doing the work.....which could lead to your flunking out of school and having to reapply in the future.

 

[4JNA]

running is my therapy...

Edit: Please stop viewing but not commenting lmao

sounds like you need a break. sooner rather than later. best of luck.

 

[TedM]

The credits should last. But I would check with one of your college counselors before making any serious decisions. I also struggled with a lack of motivation in college and well the fun available only made it more difficult. I took a career test at our career center that was supposed to help me pick and major and a career. It didn't really help too much but it gave me a good enough perspective to know what I liked and how I could focus in school.

 

[GrandPhrase]

First, people are going to view and not comment because you are here seeking advice that is actually quite serious. It outranks the kids asking where to spend their last paycheck. So try your very best not to dictate how people react to your thread.

When I see people say things that you say I wonder how the hell they got into college in the first place. I had to work pretty hard to get into my school, or so I thought. Maybe times have changed, but I cannot imagine they've changed that much. For someone to be accepted to a college and piss it all away within a matter of weeks seems unfair to someone else who probably really wanted to get in, but that is not within your control totally. I get that.

It sounds to me like you're not ready for college at all and you may very well never be. You're lazy, by your own account, and you only think of music. School is not a good fit for you right now but I question whether or not you could really make something of yourself in the hip hop world if you're naturally lazy. Perhaps the structure of school is useful and you just don't want that structure. In the end, you have to do what is right for you. It would help to talk to someone; there is staff on campus that is likely there for you during these troubled time. Seeking a definite answer from a bunch of forum strangers isn't exactly the best idea.

If I had to give you an answer the best I can do is put it in the form of a personal anecdote. At 18 I was accepted to college and did not go, I started community college because I felt I wasn't ready to leave home (school was 2500 miles away). I wanted the program, but I lost my nerve and I do have a little regret over it but I made the best of it. CC wasn't my thing either, I had a great job (for an 18 year old) and just thought I was awesomesauce. I left CC after about a year and continued to work. Years later I thought that it was time to return. I was focused and had more to lose because I was completely financially responsible for my education now. I pushed hard and completed my BA and my MBA back to back and feel proud and grateful that I decided to take care of business. I also worked full time during that time. I certainly wish I did not have to but that was the only way to pay for school.

The moral, I left college and went back when it felt right. Lucky for me it felt right in my 20's and I didn't waste too much time dicking around. Maybe that's what it will be for you but my issue was not being lazy, that is a trait I simply do not possess. Hopefully you grow out of that because it won't really be useful in the years to come.

Good luck.

I understand what your trying to say. How many years did you takena break for?
I mean I am lazy but I wasnt this lazy where to the point where I barely study. Before it was like 3 hours but now its like 30 minutes. I think I am going to leave for home now. And thanks for your advice.

----------

Okay OP, you want comments, here's mine.

At the very least, you're not ready to be a college student. Being a college student - in earnest - requires you to basically turn your life upside-down for four years or so, doing a ton of stuff that other people want you to do, sticking to schedules other people make for you, all without having anybody at all breathing down your neck about it. And to put it bluntly, you're just not there.

At most, and more likely, you're just not college material. Don't take it as a personal insult, because I don't mean it as such. As a former instructor, I can tell you that not everybody was meant to be a college student. That could mean they aren't smart enough, or they aren't interested enough, or they're too distracted, or whatever - in your case, you sound like you're just too lazy. Again, that's not an insult, that's just who you are (based on your self-description above).

To address your other questions - college credits can and do expire, typically after a set number of years (talk to your faculty advisor). Also, if you really want to take a leave of absence, you should finish out the semester. It's not unheard-of to give a student a break in the middle of a semester, but it's usually due to medical or family emergencies and not a chronic lack of motivation.

I quit college for a year and a half after going for three semesters, and it was painstakingly hard to get motivated to go back once I did - but incredibly easy for me to stay enrolled once I did re-enroll.

I'll admit i am lazy - i naturally am. But i know certainly for a fact that before this, i was much more productive. Even though i was lazy in the past, at least i had the right mind to even care to go to classes and put some effort but now i feel like the bare minimum is out of me. Well, since its my first year as a freshman, credits wouldnt really matter expiring right, as it is like half a semester..

 

[dukebound85]

nothing worth having in life is easy

now is the easiest time you wil have to dedicate for school. It will only get harder the older you get

I suggest making an honest effort and finish out the semester and then weigh your options

You drop out now, you will have paid for the entire semester and have ZERO credits under your belt (as you didn't finish the classes)

What are you going to do at home? continue to be a bum? Honest question. How would that solve things? Take steps to get on track but I would finish the semester out as you paid for it already. I would not go back and pay more until you have an idea of what you want to do

 

[Macky-Mac]

.... Well, since its my first year as a freshman, credits wouldnt really matter expiring right, as it is like half a semester..

so you actually wont have any credits that could expire?

Keep in mind that if you don't officially take a leave or withdraw, you'll end up with fails on your record........and there's also the possibility the school will officially dismiss you, meaning you wont be able to return.

If you're going to leave now, at least consider making the minimum effort to salvage some possibility you can return at a future date.

 

[leenak]

And talk to a school counselor/college advisor as soon as possible. They can provide you more perspective.

 

[heehee]

I'm guessing everything is paid by your parents?

 

[GrandPhrase]

nothing worth having in life is easy

now is the easiest time you wil have to dedicate for school. It will only get harder the older you get

I suggest making an honest effort and finish out the semester and then weigh your options

You drop out now, you will have paid for the entire semester and have ZERO credits under your belt (as you didn't finish the classes)

What are you going to do at home? continue to be a bum? Honest question. How would that solve things? Take steps to get on track but I would finish the semester out as you paid for it already. I would not go back and pay more until you have an idea of what you want to do

I am planning on finishing this semester, and then going home. I know i am failing a class or two,but will this make it hard tomreturn? Dont take me wrong - i plan to return.

----------

I'm guessing everything is paid by your parents?

What are you trying to say? That im a waste? Dont fk round obviously i feel so wrong for doing this, but i need a break.

 

[dukebound85]

I am planning on finishing this semester, and then going home. I know i am failing a class or two,but will this make it hard tomreturn? Dont take me wrong - i plan to return.

Has the W drop period already passed?

If not, I would strongly consider W dropping the classes you are failing unless you think you can get a passing grade

If you get F's you will be put on academic probation most likely and will have to have a certain GPA to stay enrolled

If you are in bad shape, don't just quit but look into whether the option is there for withdrawing from the university. That way you will not have your classes show up with grades and when you do want to return, you wont have the obstacle of bad grades on your record

I am speaking only from my experiences with my college. May be different for you in terms of policy

 

[heehee]

What are you trying to say? That im a waste? Dont fk round obviously i feel so wrong for doing this, but i need a break.

I'm not saying you are a waste, but you are wasting time and money. Things don't get easier in life, it gets harder. If you need help, talk to a professional, don't just drop out thinking things will get better by itself.

 

[leenak]

I am planning on finishing this semester, and then going home. I know i am failing a class or two,but will this make it hard tomreturn? Dont take me wrong - i plan to return.

Only a school counselor/advisor can tell you the answer to that but there is a good chance that you won't be allowed to return if you fail 2 classes as you'd be most likely put on probation.

 

[GrandPhrase]

I'm not saying you are a waste, but you are wasting time and money. Things don't get easier in life, it gets harder. If you need help, talk to a professional, don't just drop out thinking things will get better by itself.

Im not dropping as i said im taking a break. During my break at home i will try to explore, get advice, and the like.

----------

Only a school counselor/advisor can tell you the answer to that but there is a good chance that you won't be allowed to return if you fail 2 classes as you'd be most likely put on probation.

Well, not failing 2 classes only 1 but the other very close. I spoke with an advisor today and she dropped thefailing one and added a mini half semester course.

----------

A lot of people here are assuming im DROPPING no im not i am taking a leave of absence or a time of break for an 'x' period of time.

 

[Orange Crane]

A "leave of absence" in the first semester of your freshman year is dropping out. It doesn't mean you can never go back but don't lie to yourself.

 

[GrandPhrase]

Okay OP, you want comments, here's mine.

At the very least, you're not ready to be a college student. Being a college student - in earnest - requires you to basically turn your life upside-down for four years or so, doing a ton of stuff that other people want you to do, sticking to schedules other people make for you, all without having anybody at all breathing down your neck about it. And to put it bluntly, you're just not there.

At most, and more likely, you're just not college material. Don't take it as a personal insult, because I don't mean it as such. As a former instructor, I can tell you that not everybody was meant to be a college student. That could mean they aren't smart enough, or they aren't interested enough, or they're too distracted, or whatever - in your case, you sound like you're just too lazy. Again, that's not an insult, that's just who you are (based on your self-description above).

To address your other questions - college credits can and do expire, typically after a set number of years (talk to your faculty advisor). Also, if you really want to take a leave of absence, you should finish out the semester. It's not unheard-of to give a student a break in the middle of a semester, but it's usually due to medical or family emergencies and not a chronic lack of motivation.

I quit college for a year and a half after going for three semesters, and it was painstakingly hard to get motivated to go back once I did - but incredibly easy for me to stay enrolled once I did re-enroll.

Dont take this the wrong way. Im not commenting because of its offensive nature, though its not intended, but because of assumption and lack of knowledge and your claim to know who I am.

You have no right to tell me whether I am college material or not (you can state your opinions but you just cant assume from characteristics stated on the internet), you only have the right currently to give me advice that I asked for.

Think of it like this - you state that your characteristics and I can assume many things about you such as your lack of qualification of being an instructor(former).

Nevertheless, I am not denying my laziness or my situation - yes I am not fit for college right now, but that doesnt mean I am not college material. If I am college material or not that is up to fate to decide but dont assume **** you dont know. You know assumption is wrong - it would be unjust to incarcerate and condemn someone as a murderer because they were with someone who died(example). You may have evidence but you may not explicitly state he or she is a murderer, only that the individual may be responsible or a potential wrongdoer.

 

[Roller]

Based on what you've said, it sounds like you're not at all ready to continue with your college education now. That's OK. There's nothing wrong with taking some time, perhaps as much as a year or two, to decide what you want to do, whether it's return to college, go to a technical school, or something else.

If you can, it would be good to finish the semester with as many credits as you can. Ask your advisor about the best strategy. Meanwhile, you can come up with a plan for how to spend your time away from college, whether it's volunteering, working, or what have you. Hopefully, you can find something that really motivates and excites you and potentially takes you in a direction that you never would have considered before.

 

[Tomorrow]

You have no right to tell me whether I am college material or not (you can state your opinions but you just cant assume from characteristics stated on the internet), you only have the right currently to give me advice that I asked for.

<snip>

Nevertheless, I am not denying my laziness or my situation - yes I am not fit for college right now, but that doesnt mean I am not college material. If I am college material or not that is up to fate to decide but dont assume **** you dont know.

I haven't assumed anything; I simply went with what you told us.

I have to disagree with you on two points in particular: (1) I most certainly do have the right to tell you whether I believe you're college material based on your posts, and (2) when you post on an internet forum, describing your situation and asking for advice, you're going to get advice that's based on what you posted in the forum.

It's quite true that I don't know you in person and there may be much more to you than what's posted in your original post; however, when you post and say the things about yourself that you said:

I am currently a freshman at CMU about halfway thru my first semester...

I don't know what to study or what I'm doing...

I'm already failing one or two classes because of my natural laziness and lack of motivation...

I don't know if I want to go back to school if I take a break...

I mean I am lazy but I wasnt this lazy where to the point where I barely study. Before it was like 3 hours but now its like 30 minutes...

I'll admit i am lazy - i naturally am...

i feel like the bare minimum is out of me...

You're getting onto me for supposedly passing judgment on you, but those are your words, not mine. Think about that for a minute - if you assess yourself so consistently, how do others around you see your work ethic and dedication to school?

I'll tell you what I've told many others; don't post on an internet board asking for advice, then turn around and get angry with the advice you get. I've seen this in students time and time again - and in all likelihood, either I'm right and my advice to you is spot-on, or you've seriously misrepresented yourself in your posts.

 

[Jessica Lares]

Keep at it. It's good that you sought out help and got that class sorted and replaced with another one. Just think about how the holidays are almost coming and how you only have a little left of the year still do do until you have a few weeks off.

Nobody knows what they want to do when they're a freshman, but don't let that stop you from getting the core curriculum out of the way. It's hard because it has to be hard, otherwise you wouldn't be getting anything from it and would only waste money.

You seem to love music... You ever think about taking production classes? I took some, and so did many other people who play instruments and sing. Knowing your way around the software and equipment can really take you far, and it's much more interesting than taking an English or science class.

 

[GrandPhrase]

I haven't assumed anything; I simply went with what you told us.

I have to disagree with you on two points in particular: (1) I most certainly do have the right to tell you whether I believe you're college material based on your posts, and (2) when you post on an internet forum, describing your situation and asking for advice, you're going to get advice that's based on what you posted in the forum.

It's quite true that I don't know you in person and there may be much more to you than what's posted in your original post; however, when you post and say the things about yourself that you said:





You're getting onto me for supposedly passing judgment on you, but those are your words, not mine. Think about that for a minute - if you assess yourself so consistently, how do others around you see your work ethic and dedication to school?

I'll tell you what I've told many others; don't post on an internet board asking for advice, then turn around and get angry with the advice you get. I've seen this in students time and time again - and in all likelihood, either I'm right and my advice to you is spot-on, or you've seriously misrepresented yourself in your posts.

First of all, I am describing myself as lazy - naturally, but that doesnt mean this situation has happened throughout. You are assuming I'm not college material because of what I describe myself as, but CMU is a difficult school to get into. You think I've been doing nothing during my high school years? Since there's a sudden drop in productivity between college and high school I MAY not be college material, but don't tell me for sure that I am not. You put such definiteness in your answer why choose "you ARE" instead of "you may".
Also, why delve the knife deeper, are you that inhumane? I understand you want to assess me all or nothing, but emotions you do not consider. You should understand one is at a sensitive measure here and advise me not by delving the knife deeper and tellin me what kind of person I am and what I ought to do, but help me remove the blade. Advice is advice, but when you even have "it" you should know in certain cases that advice is not ONLY advice. It brings along emotions and comfort and the like. Do you live by such definition and definitive measures?

 

[heehee]

Why are you arguing on the internet on a Friday afternoon? You are in college, go out and have fun with your friends. I think this is the reason why you are not enjoying college.